//------------------------------// // Ponies and Chaos in Las Vegas // Story: HUMAN World // by Razalon The Lizardman //------------------------------// “Is it just me, or is this place more boring than we made it out to be in the book?” Rainbow Dash asked, staring out the passenger side window. Unlike the vibrant, neon-obsessed city the ponies remembered writing about, the city they were driving through seemed dull and lifeless. The buildings were like drab towers rising up with no splendor, the streets below crowded not with energetic youngsters looking for fun but instead average pedestrians like one could find in any large city. Had it not been for the sign a few miles back saying ‘Welcome to Las Vegas’, the ponies might have believed they were in another city altogether. “I’m not sure, Rainbow,” Twilight said, keeping her eyes on the road ahead. “But it doesn’t matter, because we’re not here to sightsee.” “It might be because neon lights don’t stand out in the daytime,” Pinkie said from under the driver’s seat. “Yeah, that’s probably it.” Twilight shot a brief glance down at the pink mare pressing her hoof against the accelerator. “Thanks, Pinkie.” “Oh don’t thank me,” she replied, turning her head to smile up at Twilight. “I only know it because this thing told me so.” She indicated to a black, rectangular device laying on the car floor next to her, a screen embedded into its top which was turned on to an image of white laden with lots of black text. Laying next to it was a long, thin pen-shaped object. “What is that thing?” Rainbow asked, taking notice of the device from the other seat. “What’s happening up here now?” Rarity poked her head over the seats, following Rainbow’s gaze to the enigmatic object. “How long have you had that… whatever it is, and where did you find it?” “I got it from one of those robbers while I was doodling on their faces,” Pinkie explained. Using her free front hoof, she pushed the object a little bit closer to them and indicated for them to take it. Rarity grabbed both the object and the stylus with her telekinesis and levitated them over the seat so she and Rainbow Dash could view them together. Looking closer, they saw the image on screen looked to be styled after a textbook page, only some of it was colored blue with little numbers next to them. At the top was the word ‘Neon’ in large font, while off to the side was a symbol shaped like an unfinished globe puzzle with accompanying text underneath it. “‘Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia’,” Rarity read out loud. “What the heck is a ‘wiki’?” Rainbow asked. Pinkie shrugged. “Beats me, but that thing is super de duper awesomer to the max!” she said, letting go of the accelerator in her excitement. “Pinkie!” Twilight shouted in alarm. “Whoops, sorry,” she replied, quickly pressing her hoof back down on the pedal. “Anyway, I’ve been checking out all kinds of places inside that thing. You wouldn’t believe all the things it’s got inside. Books, articles, pictures, even mini cinema! It’s so awesome!” Rainbow shrugged. “Still doesn’t beat me in that category,” she stated, matter-of-fact like. “Don’t be so sure, Dashie,” Pinkie said, and giggled. “Try typing in your own name.” Rainbow stared at her for a moment before giving the device a scrutinizing gaze. She then snatched the stylus out of the air with her mouth and pressed it up against the screen. After methodically typing her name in the search bar and pressing ‘enter’, the screen whited out for a second, only to fill back up with a new passage with Rainbow’s name at the top. “Whoa,” she said. Rarity looked down at the passage, her face turning confused. “What is this supposed to be?” she asked, her eyes falling on her own name and the accompanying paragraph underneath it. “Some sort of biography?” “I d’unno,” Pinkie said, shrugging, “but I’ve been finding all sorts of stuff like that from typing in all our names.” A smile stretched across her face, almost eclipsing her cheeks. “You wouldn’t believe all the stuff I’ve found about us: pictures, short films, stories… they’ve even made plushies of us, girls! Plushies!” “Well, who wouldn’t want a plushie of yours truly?” Rainbow asked, patting her chest and casually inspecting her hoof with her cockiest grin. Rarity rolled her eyes. “I wonder.” Pinkie looked up to Twilight. “So, whaddya think, Twilight?” she asked. “Pretty neat, huh?” “All I know is that we mentioned nothing about that device in HUMAN,” Twilight replied, neutrally, keeping her eyes ahead. “But that doesn’t matter. Whoever sent me this Enchanted Comic has a lot of explaining to do, and the sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can get our answers.” Suddenly, a loud bang sounded from outside, followed by the van bumping and lurching around as it moved, throwing the ponies off balance. “What was that!?” Rarity screamed, gripping the seat for dear life. “I don’t know!” Twilight shouted. “Pinkie, take your hoof off the accelerator!” Pinkie did as instructed, and the van started slowing down. The ponies all relaxed, their adrenaline rushes slowing down along with the van as Twilight brought it off the road, coming to a stop along a curb in a suburban district. Setting the van in ‘park’ and pulling out the ignition key, she turned to each of her friends. “Everypony okay?” she asked. “I’m fine,” Rainbow confirmed. “And I as well, darling,” Rarity followed. “Hey, who turned out the lights!?” Pinkie said through her mane, which had fallen over her face as she laid against the backrest of a seat. A quick parting of it from Rarity’s telekinesis cured her not-blindness, and she happily sprang to all fours. “Peachy keen here!” she sing-songed. “What happened?” Rainbow asked, gazing out the window, her features turning dark. “Are we under attack?’ Twilight shook her head. “If that was the case, we’d be getting barraged right now.” She undid the lock on the driver’s side door and opened it, stepping down onto the curb. A single glance at the van’s front left tire confirmed her suspicions. “Yep, we’ve got a flat tire.” “Well, that’s just wonderful,” Rarity moaned. She threw her forehooves over the passenger seat, her lips pouting. “And I don’t suppose there’s a spare anywhere we can use?” “Nope,” Pinkie said, bouncing up to her, happy as ever. “But look what I’ve got that’s even better!” Using the prehensile quality of her mane, she retrieved from its deep confines a single, silver-colored coin, a stylized emblem of a man’s head on the front. “Our problems are solved!” “Pinkie, where did you get that?” Twilight asked, her tone that of neither fear nor anger, rather, genuine curiosity. “And what do you mean all our problems are solved?” “Yeah, Pinks,” Rainbow spoke up, raising a skeptical eyebrow as she examined the coin. “How’s that supposed to help us?” “I got it from the lead robber,” Pinkie explained. “And it’ll help us becauuuuse—” she pointed out the rear window, back toward the casino strips they’d passed by, “—we can use it to get rich quick here.” “You’re suggesting we gamble?” Rarity asked, a little apprehension in her tone. “Mhmm.” Pinkie nodded. “We can earn enough money to get the van fixed, or even better, buy plane tickets!” “Only one problem with that, Pinkie,” Twilight said, frowning. “Human airports employ maximum security levels. We’d need identification if we want to get anywhere, which we don’t have.” “Well, can’t you just make something up, then?” Rainbow asked. “I mean, you’ve got a spell for this sorta thing, right?” Everypony turned their attention to Twilight while she tapped her chin. “I think…” She trailed off, her eyes gaining a distant look that let her friends know she was deep in thought. She spent the next minute or so pacing back and forth across the pavement aside the van, eventually turning back to her friends with a confident smile. “Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do…” The Equestrian countryside rolled on by. And by. And by… With a sigh, Applejack pulled away from the window and turned to her companions. Fluttershy was curled up in the opposite seat, looking to be fast asleep, while Spike was staring down at the Enchanted Comic with a studious gaze. Curious, Applejack hopped off her seat and crossed over to him. Careful not to disturb Fluttershy, she sidled up next to the drake and asked, “Whatcha doin’?” Spike briefed a glance to her in his eye’s corner before shrugging and setting the book on his other side. “I thought maybe there’d be some hidden clues as to who sent Twilight the comic inside.” He placed his hands under his chin and lay down on the seat. “But I guess it won’t matter once we get to Canterlot.” Applejack nodded. “Don’t worry, Sugarcube; we’ll find out who’s responsible an’ give’em a good what-fer!” Spike smiled. “Yeah we will.” “Since we’re talkin’, Ah’ve been meanin’ ta ask ya something.” “Sure, what?” Applejack’s face took on a dark tint, unnerving Spike a little. “You met the owner of the House of Enchanted Comics, right?” she asked. “Was it anypony we know?” “No, just some really fat unicorn with a blue shirt and a ponytail mane.” Spike lifted his gaze up, deep in remembrance. “Kept saying everything was the worst whatever, almost on instinct.” “Didja get his name?” “No, he didn’t wear a nametag or anything, and I was so excited about getting that Power Ponies comic I didn’t think to ask him much of anything.” “Well, whoever they are, Ah hope they know who bought that comic, as well as where the no-good varmint lives.” She lightly pounded her front hooves together, a fierce gaze settling in her eyes while her mouth fell into a hard frown. “An’ if’n he sent it himself…” Spike nodded, letting his eyes drift closed as he finished for her. “He’ll be in for a rude awakening, yeah…” His final words went unspoken as he drifted off to sleep, leaving Applejack alone. She spared the comic a single glance before looking out the window at the passing countryside, thinking to herself what their friends might be up to in the comic’s world. “Yo, dude, look at all this green!” “Sick, man! How much did you make?” “Enough to buy me that yacht for me and Sally!” “She is one lucky babe. Hey, maybe we can—URK!” “You okay Jim—OOF!” One after the other, the two men fell to the floor with loud thuds, unconscious. All the money the first was holding fell around him. Had it not been bundled, it would’ve scattered, likely to be lost to the wind. From the shadows of the alley they were passing through, Rainbow Dash and Twilight emerged, a grim look plastered across the latter’s muzzle. “I hope they’ll be alright,” she said. Rainbow shrugged. “As long as they’re still breathing.” She walked over and began poking her nose through the first guy’s pants pockets. “Let’s hurry before they wake up.” With a solemn nod, Twilight stepped up to the second guy and got to searching. A few seconds of pilfering from both heralded two wallets. Twilight took both in her magic and laid them on the ground next to each other. Rainbow watched, fascinated, as her friend then lit up her horn, enveloping the wallets in a lavender glow. Both then shined with a bright white light, forcing her to partially cover her eyes, accompanied by a short series of popping sounds; four in total. When the light cleared, and Rainbow could see properly, there were no longer just two wallets. An additional four had appeared, all glowing a shimmering lavender aura which soon faded, leaving them looking perfectly inconspicuous. Panting from exertion, Twilight lifted one up in her magic and opened it. With a small smile, she passed it to Rainbow, who took it in her hooves and opened it herself. Inside was a picture of herself, plastered against a card that displayed a bunch of numbers and words she couldn’t make heads or tails of, but it still brought a grin to her face. “Am I good-looking, or am I good-looking and awesome?” she asked, teasingly. Twilight rolled her eyes, retaining her smile, and picked up the remaining constructed wallets while returning the originals to their unconscious owners’ pockets. “C’mon, let’s get back to Rarity and Pinkie.” With a nod, Rainbow began following her out of the alley, never taking her eyes off of the picture displayed in her newly constructed wallet. “I must say, I would’ve expected such a place to be more popular,” Rarity said, surveying the scene before her and Pinkie. The casino floorspace, plentiful as it was, played host to only a scattered few groups of humans dressed in attire ranging from fancy suits to laughably cliché tourist wear, although a few did wear more casual-looking clothes. They crowded around tables and slot machines, keeping focused on their games and little else. The machines themselves, in stark contrast to the buildings outside, were brightly lit with colorful neon bulbs, lighting up the casino’s otherwise shaded interior. “Well, that just means we’ll have an easier time of doing this,” Pinkie chirped. She began trotting toward an unoccupied row of slot machines, Rarity following behind while occasionally glancing around her, keeping an eye out for potential trouble. After the incident at the bank, she couldn’t feel safe being in any place where money was plentiful. The two mares made their way down the row of slot machines, eventually coming to a stop in front of one near the middle. They were all alone on either side, and far enough away from either entrance that they could feasibly enact their part of Twilight’s plan without being discovered. Stepping up to the machine, Rarity used her magic to lift Pinkie’s coin up and into the designated slot. Immediately, the machine began making a whirring noise as the three columns of varied pictures in front rolled with amazing speed, making them all a collective blur of mixed colors. “Remember to go for Bar,” Pinkie said. Rarity nodded. “Right.” While Pinkie began glancing between both entrances intermittently, keeping an eye out for trouble, Rarity furrowed her brow in concentration as she studied the spinning columns, keeping her hoof just above the first button. Her keen eyes slowly picked out each individual section on the first column as they whizzed by, and slowly, but surely, she picked out the Bar symbol, and waited. ...One and a half seconds. ...NOW! She smashed her hoof against the button, making the first column come to an immediate stop on the Bar symbol, while the remaining two columns kept spinning. “One down,” Rarity whispered under her breath. “Omigosh!” Pinkie’s sudden exclamation caused Rarity to jump. She spun on her hooves to face her friend. “What is it, Candy?” she asked. She glanced between both entrances, but saw nothing, or anyone, heading toward them. “I don’t see any trouble.” Pinkie held up the mobile device for her to see, a wide grin plastered across her face. The screen showed a picture of six humans, weirdly colored and dressed as far as they went. Only after a couple of moments did Rarity realize the picture was of them and their friends as humans. The sight of her wearing a white, loose-fitting dress in place of her pristine white fur coat made Rarity visibly cringe before she narrowed her eyes at Pinkie. “Now is not the time for messing around with that little contraption, Candy,” she said, letting her harshness come through in full. “You’re supposed to be keeping watch for trouble.” “Oh yeah, right.” Pinkie stowed the device back into her mane and took a guard stance, facing toward one of the entrances. Rolling her eyes, Rarity returned her attention to the machine, and the second spinning column. Squinting her eyes in concentration, she picked out its own Bar symbol. Alright… now! She hit the second button, to which the column stopped right on the Bar symbol. “Wonderful!” Rarity clapped her hooves together excitedly. “Just one more to go and we’ll be set to go home!” “Um, Maria?” Pinkie asked, tapping her shoulder. “Not now, Candy,” she replied, pushing her friend’s hoof away before settling her gaze on the final spinning column. “I’ve almost got this.” “But Maria…” The unicorn didn’t hear her, having tuned out Pinkie to focus her attention entirely on the last remaining column. Just one more… N— “Excuse me, Miss?” came a masculine voice from her right. Rarity froze. Her pupils shrank to pinpricks. That voice, despite being perfectly normal every which way, sent an icy chill down her spine. Her body tensed, and all focus she had on the spinning column was replaced with immeasurable dread at what was happening. Slowly, straining to force her neck muscles to respond to her brain’s stimuli in spite of the fear coursing through her very soul, she turned her head toward the voice. Her worst fear was confirmed. Standing there, eyes wide with both confusion and fear, was a security guard. His burly figure towered before her, intimidating enough on its own, but the addition of his cold, steel blue eyes boring into her sent another chill down Rarity’s spine. Out of her peripheral vision, she saw Pinkie looking much the same as she felt right then. She chewed her bottom lip, nervously casting her eyes between her and the guard. Had it not been for the whirring noise it made while active, the slot machine’s very existence would’ve been lost to the two terrified mares. At last, the guard spoke again, sounding utterly calm despite his apparent discomfort. “Ma’am, I’m gonna have to ask that you come with me.” Rarity felt the sweat begin to accumulate on her forehead. “Why, whatever do you mean?” she asked with a nervous chuckle. “Nothing to see here but a couple of young ladies playing with their hard-earned money.” “Yeah, nothing bad happening here, right?” Pinkie said, sounding no more confident than Rarity. The guard’s expression didn’t change, but his voice took on a sterner tone as he replied. “Don’t make this any more trouble than it has to be, Miss.” He took a step forward, to which both mares reflexively took one back. “Both of you need to come with me right now.” The sweat was pouring down by this point. Rarity felt her heartbeat quicken and her body seize up as the guard took another step forward, reaching for her. “Excuse me, is there a problem here?” The familiar voice was a godsend to Rarity’s nerves. All at once, she felt her body relax and the oppressive anxiety churning in her mind dissipate, as if time had stopped and allowed her to meditate for hours on end in just a second. Everyone turned toward the voice, and the two mares smiled wide at the sight of Twilight standing there, only to frown a little upon noticing Rainbow Dash wasn’t with her. Her face held a pensive expression, but a sense of cheekiness made itself present in the ever-so-slightly upturned corners of her mouth. The guard’s expression was now lost to Rarity and Pinkie, but his rigid posture combined with his crossed arms made it clear he wasn’t swayed by their friend’s arrival. “Are these two with you, miss?” he asked, pointing to Rarity and Pinkie. Twilight nodded. “Yes, and I’d like to know what the trouble here is, please?” she asked, politely. “I just need them to come with me for a little bit to answer a few questions.” His eyebrows turned up in thought. “Actually, I’m gonna need you to come too.” Twilight tilted her head in response, her features turning especially confused for a brief moment before a mischievous smile crossed her lips. “This is some pleasant weather we’re having, huh!?” Momentary looks of confusion washed over everyone’s face, before a sudden ringing sound from above prompted them to look up, to which their faces were quite literally washed over. Shouts of alarm and panic began rising throughout the building as the sprinkler system showered the casino floor with its load, drenching everything within range. Included among that which was in range was the guard. He threw his arms over his head and tried to get out from under the above sprinkler head, only to trip over Twilight’s outstretched hoof and fall to the floor with a hard thud, knocking him out cold. Twilight stared with remorse at him for a bit before turning to her friends with a small smile. “You okay girls?” she asked. Rarity took a moment to breathe deeply, calming the last of her frayed nerves before replying. “Yes, darling, I’m alright now that you’re here.” “Me too!” Pinkie chirped. Then she looked around with a small frown. “But where’s Dash— I mean Jenny?” “Looking for me?” said a voice as Pinkie felt a hoof clamp onto her withers. She turned around to see Rainbow’s smirking face staring back. “Didn’t think I’d leave you all hanging, did you?” “Jenny!” Pinkie capped off her exclamation by wrapping her hooves around her friend and squeezing like there was no tomorrow. “Thank goodness you’re okay!” “Good to see you too, Candy,” Rainbow struggled to say through her friend’s crushing hug. “Where were you just now?” Rarity asked Rainbow as Pinkie let her go. “And why is the ceiling showering everything?” Rainbow shifted her mouth around until a small, white stick with a beige end stuck out. She spat it out onto the floor, where it bounced once before rolling under the still-active slot machine. “Stole some dude’s cigarette and used it to start the sprinkler system,” she said while casually inspecting her hoof. “No biggie.” “Are you crazy!?” Rarity shouted, throwing her hooves up and standing on her hind legs. “We’ve already attracted enough attention unto ourselves, now we’re practically begging to get arrested!” “Relax, Maria,” Twilight said, putting a hoof on her friend’s shoulder. “We did what we had to do, and if it comes back to haunt us, we can take on whatever this comic’s world throws at us.” Rarity sighed. “I suppose you’re right,” she said, and looked between Twilight and Rainbow. “So, did you get our IDs?” “Mhmm.” Twilight levitated two cards from her side, passing one each to Rarity and Pinkie, who accepted them with a nod and an enthusiastic squeal of excitement, respectively. “What about your end? Did you get the money?” “Almost, darling,” Rarity said before turning back to the slot machine, still active despite being as wet as everything else beneath the sprinklers. “Just a little more… There!” The lever was pulled, and the slot machine’s last remaining column stopped on the final Bar symbol. The machine then lit up in a flurry of lights and buzzers while a whirring noise sounded from inside, followed by the clinks and clanks of metal coins piling into the designated tray. “Awesome!” Rainbow shouted. She leapt into the air on her wings in excitement, only to be instantly pulled back down by Twilight’s hoof. She glared at the pegasus, who sheepishly chuckled while tucking in her wings. “So, yeah, we’re good to go?” “It would appear so,” Rarity hummed as she began levitating large clumps of coins from the tray and into Pinkie’s mane, who giggled with every load. Eventually she finished loading all the coins into Pinkie’s mane, save for one, which she held in her telekinesis, poised to insert into the machine. “That said, as long as we have the benefit of all this mayhem—” she gestured with a hoof beyond the row of slot machines, where the sounds of people shouting could still be heard over the continued spraying of the overhead sprinklers, “—another round couldn’t hurt. Better to be safe then sorry, after all.” The three other mares nodded in unison. “Sure thing,” Rainbow said. “We’ll watch your back for trouble.” “Hopefully we’ll be out of here before everything calms down,” Twilight mused, facing one way down the slot machines, while Pinkie and Rainbow faced the other way. She glanced upward with a slight frown. “Those sprinklers can’t last forever.” “Oh I don’t know,” Pinkie said with a giggle. “They’ve lasted pretty long so far.” The other three turned to stare at her blankly, before remembering who exactly they were looking at and turning back, rolling their eyes at Pinkie’s antics. “Sure darling,” Rarity said while inserting the coin into the machine, activating it in another frenzy of lights and buzzers. “Whatever you say…”