//------------------------------// // Wandering the Everfree Forest // Story: My Adventures in Equestria // by ThatDiscordGuy //------------------------------// "Who said that." I said to no one in particular. I thought for a while before coming with the idea that it was just the wind messing with me like usual. Wait a minute... I thought with my massive amount of knowledge. Quiet voice, overuse of the world um, I'm in Equestria for no reason at all, and I'm in a meadow full of life and animals unlike Earth where everything is very life less. If logic indicates then it must be either Fluttershy or Chrysalis because she was totally thrown towards the forest and not the desert if all those shipping stories a correct. I'm thinking that it's Fluttershy but I'm not for certain. Maybe Chrysalis is taking the form of Fluttershy and this is all just an excuse to meet Chrysalis. As I stood there and pondered life's question I heard low pitched growling noises from the shrub. These didn't phase me because I was still thinking this brain buster of a riddle so the low pitched growl turned into a medium pitched growl but I was still thinking. The medium pitched growl finally turned into a high pitched, whiny growl (unlike my voice) and finally got my angry attention. I once again prepared my Royal Canterlot voice and screamed at the thing that doesn't speak or understand English because yelling at stuff that can't yell back makes me feel good about myself. "SHUT THE BUCK UP YOU GOD DAMN THING! I'M TRYING TO THINK HERE IF IT'S FLUTTERSHY OR CHRYSALIS THAT IS CALLING OUT TO ME! SO PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF CELESTIA, LUNA, DISCORD, CADANCE, AND ANYTHING ELSE THAT IS A GOD LIKE BEING IN THIS UNIVERSE SHUT THE BUCK UP BECAUSE I'M MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU WILL EVER BE!" With that the thing jumped out as if it were in a Micheal Bay movie (complete with slow motion and an explosion) and revealed itself to be a Manticore. But it wasn't just a Manticore because it had a pack of 20 other Manticores crawl out of the small shrub as if it were a small ass clown car thus making 21 manticores come out of a small useless shrub. They all surrounded me and were ready to rip my shit apart but the only thought that came to my head was Challenge Accepted. I was getting bored without the mindless violence that I partake in everyday because everything on Earth was out for my blood. True Story. I felt like initiating the battle so I ran a blistering speeds that would make Rainbow Dash jealous because I now have super speed for no reason and ran behind the first three manticores that were closest to me and grabbed them by the stingers. These certain manticores could only squeal from the sudden grasp on the stingers as I twirled them around like a fly swatter when trying to kill that pesky weasel that invaded my home and annoyed the crap out of me. Just like the incident with the weasel I got bored quickly and decided to throw them 100 meters in the air because now I have super strength but then again I always had that so nothing changed. As these manticores flew away I wasn't pleased with my performance so I flew up towards them for no reason because I can fly now and used my magic that I acquired because I can and flung them around like Garry's Mod rag dolls. I got bored of this so I pulled a rocket launcher out of my ass and blew them to Tartarus because they were monsters that were following their instincts so them deserve to die. As I landed I just realized that there were 18 manticores left and ready to avenge their fallen companions. I didn't feel like fighting them normally because I still had to find out if that voice belonged to Fluttershy or Chrysalis. So my eyes turned red for no reason and I shot a super awesome heat beam that vaporized the remaining 18 manticores. With this experience behind I walked off not thinking twice about my informed abilities because for all the hell I went through on Earth, I deserve these so that I can be even more awesome. As I wandered around the forest in source of the voice (which by this time whatever pony I was searching for was no where to be seen due to all the action that just happened) I went into my thinking mode and thought about Fluttershy. Fluttershy is best pony because she is so adorable and had some badass moments such as when she stared down a cockatrice. Back on Earth I would always talk about how Fluttershy was awesome and flame, threaten, and murder people if they said otherwise and did not follow my opinion like it were fact or if they didn't like ponies. What should I say when I meet her. Unless if it's Chrysalis then that would be wacky but she is not the best villain but still cool regardless... As I thought and walked like a boss I ran into something. As I looked up what I saw was mind blowing. It was a tall figure encased in stone. It had the head of a goat the had the expression of fear (a feeling that I don't know), two different antlers, the body of a serpent, a talon and lion paw for arms and hands which were sticking out as if he was going to get punched, two different wings that contradicted each other, and the legs of a donkey and a lizard, but most of all it had a badass beard and funny looking eyebrows. Speaking of best villain, there he is in all it's glory. It was the statue of Discord, the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony. For some reason it was in the Everfree Forest and not in the Canterlot Gardens as a display because that's the best thing to do with your greatest enemy (proven with Season 2 episode 1 that nothing can go wrong). I just walked up to it and picked it up and carried it with me because you never know when you would need a reality warper at your disposal, a philosophy that I follow dearly. With this I continued on my merry way to look for whoever I was looking for but who cares because I just found the statue of Discord. Now if I can just find Chrysalis and somehow get Nightmare Moon back in action then we can have an awesome adventure of epic per-portions. And so I continued on my merry way in hopes of finding Fluttershy. To be Continued again.