//------------------------------//
// Chapter 5: Earnesty 
// Story: The Elegance of Morons 
// by FrontSevens 
//------------------------------//

Discord strode through the hall during his nightly rounds of the castle. It was more of a force of habit than anything, since sitting in any one room for too long might drive him sane if he wasn’t careful.
 
There was a reason for this round, though, but it was not to check the condition of the castle, which was quite boring as it currently stood in one piece. No, this was to see if Luna had yet left the library. She’d been there all day, even skipping supper. It was grilled cheese sandwiches, too. Much better than the caviar and lobster and junk they used to serve, certainly.
 
Discord strolled into the library, lined with bookshelves full of books, and sure enough, there was little Luna in front of two books, skimming both of them simultaneously. She was surrounded by mounds of books, and was nodding off so much, she might’ve very well slept in those books had Discord not come. He had to appreciate her lack of organization, though.
 
He also noticed the scribe sitting at a table, absorbed by a thick blue tome. Discord grinned. He swirled up to the other end of the table and folded his arms. “Figured you had the night off.”
 
Clover jerked up, ripped from the world of the book, and stared at Discord with her mouth hanging open. She looked between Luna and Discord, unsure how to explain herself and what authority he had over the scribe position.
 
“Clover loves books,” Luna piped up.
 
Clover shrugged. “Yeah, well, you know, I don’t love books. I mean, I really like them, yeah, but not in the sense that I’m pursuing a long-term relationship with them.” She snorted, thinking this to be more of a joke, then her eyes widened at how awkward of a joke it was. “I, uh, that was weird of me to say. I’ll just, uh, not talk.” She stared down at the book she was holding and propped it up in front of her face to hide. She’d have to work on her humour.
 
Discord took to the air, floating over to Luna and gently closing one of her books. “I think Celestia’s about to lower the sun. That means it’s about time for one industrious little researcher to go to bed.”
 
Clover nodded, turning to leave. Discord smirked. “Make that two.”
 
A guard crawled out of a pile of books and tried to slip out unnoticed. Discord stared at him as he snuck away. “Three, apparently.” He turned to Luna. “Did you recruit the whole castle to help you research or what?”
 
She snickered as she watched Mild Vigil crawl away, though his creaking and clanking armour did nothing to help his stealth. “Nah, just him and Clover.”
 
“I see.” Discord stood up and put his hands on his hips. “Well, so they say, let tired ponies sleep. Or, uh, early to bed, early to sleep, makes you less tired, something something wise. They say something. Let’s be off.”
 
They walked out of the library and into one of the many hallways of the castle. Discord whistled for a bit, but became bored of that quickly.  
 
Conversation would pass the time better. Luna was never hard on the ears, and a good listener to boot. “How long have you been burying your face in those boring old books?” Discord said.
 
“Since after lunch.” Luna hid a yawn. “I asked Clover to help. We’ve been in the library looking for anything on the elements of harmony since.”
 
“Ah, yes, those things.” Discord said. He was surprised that Luna would spend that much time on some random rocks he’d found out in the forest. “Any luck?”
 
Luna shook her head. “None of my spells worked on them. They’re impossible.” She looked down, embarrassed. “I even tried eating them.”
 
Discord raised his eyebrows. “Even I know that’s not healthy. You need sleep, kid.”
 
“Yeah,” Luna said. She usually wasn’t one to admit that she was tired at bedtime, but it was true. Her body ached and her eyes were sore from spending all that time stooped over books and flipping pages.
 
Tricia walked up to them, chattering as she strutted, though she was tired as well. She sidled up to Discord, and he reached out a paw to pet her.
 
“What’s the big deal with this magic obsession, anyway?” Discord said, scratching Tricia under her wing. “I mean, you’re one-third pegasus and one-third earth pony, too. What happened to flying, or… earthing?”
 
He raised a good point. Magic was probably the thing she was least good at. And Celestia was often one to remind her of that. That was the reason, then. “Because then Tia won’t treat me like a kid anymore.”
 
“I get that, but you need to kick back a bit, too. Don’t overwork yourself.” Discord turned down another hallway. “It’s like you think you’re on track for god-tier power, here.” He fancied the thought of Luna as an all-powerful being like him, but figured she would probably be the god of something super cheesy like good will or, well, harmony.
 
Luna let out a yawn, her ears folded back as she urged her sleepy self to keep going. “Sombra said that too. I dunno about that.” She looked up at Discord. “Do you think I’ll ever get good at magic, Discord?”
 
Staying silent, Discord had a strange flashback. Stuck in his mind was the mental image of a shorter, more adorable version of Luna asking him the same thing. The next word he said felt half automatic and half natural. “Practice, kid. It’s all about practice.”
 
Luna nodded in agreement, smiling as Tricia snuggled up beside her, her feathers tickling the alicorn foal.
 
Smirking at the pair, Discord continued down the hallway. He felt bad that Luna really wouldn’t get anywhere with the rocks. The elements of harmony were real, yes, but from what little Discord could remember about them, they were ideals more than anything. Harmony was a sentiment, and not nearly as much fun as chaos.
 
He wondered just how much time Luna would waste in fiddling around with those rocks, expecting them to release some sort of ancient mystical power. Perhaps what the little whippersnapper needed was a break. A vacation, something else to keep her occupied. Or perhaps a more tangible goal, or at least a goal that wasn’t impossible.
 
Discord saw the sun travel down the sky outside, the deep orange light casting silhouettes of the three of them on a nearby wall. He was then struck with an idea. “You know what? We’re gonna take a detour.”
 
“Huh?” Luna said, then flailed as Discord yanked her, taking a sharp turn down a different hallway. She slid across the ground as Discord dragged her along. “Where are we going?”
 
Discord grinned. “We’re going to have a little nighttime escapade. Oh, hoo hoo, yes we are!” He did a giddy roll midair, imagining the look on Celestia’s face when she saw what he was about to do. “Trust me, Lulu, we’re going to have loads of fun!”
 
Luna felt her sleepiness melt away, the breaking-the-rules-at-night type of excitement propelling her to bust out in a run. She freed herself from Discord’s grasp, dashing down the hallway. Tricia joined in, flapping her wings and taking flight above them.
 
Discord kept twirling as he soared through the atrium and pulled open the doors to the outside. He surveyed the sky—the sun had fully set, and the moon was nowhere in sight. Perfect timing.
 
Luna looked up at the night sky riddled with a thousand stars, and took in a hearty swig of the cool, sweet evening air through her nose. Night in the forest was so calm and still, the leaves rustling in the light breeze and the crickets chirping in a slow, serene lullaby. She never got to see the night enough, not with her parents and now Celestia enforcing bed times for her.
 
“I’ve got a little project for ya, kid,” Discord said. He whirled around, his arms outstretched as he presented the sky to Luna. “Raise the moon.”
 
Luna’s eyes widened. “Really?”
 
“Yeah, give it a shot.” He glanced northward. “Hurry, though, or your sister’s going to beat you to it.”
 
Luna looked up at the night sky, then back at Discord. This didn’t seem like a good idea. “Tia said I’m not supposed to, though.”
 
“Who cares? Rules are more fun to break than to follow.” He waved her on. “C’mon, just do it.”
 
He had a point. What fun was living in their kingdom if Celestia was going to drag her down the whole time with rules? Besides, what harm could come from raising the moon for only one night? Celestia got to do it every night anyway. Plus, she could always use ‘Discord told me to’ as an excuse.
 
“Okay,” Luna said, standing tall, ready to try. Then, looking around, she realized there was a small problem standing in her way. “Uh, where is it?”
 
Discord chuckled. “Oh, right. I’ll help you with that.” He stretched out his talon, nudging the moon up from the east. He lifted it slowly until a little bit of the moon peeked out from under the horizon. Releasing his grip on the moon, he dusted his hands off and grinned. “There. Now you do the rest.”
 
Luna nodded, getting into a solid moon-raising stance. Her breath wavered. Her elbows shivered. This wouldn’t be too hard. It’d be no different than levitating anything else. This was just like a feather, except bigger. Much, much, much bigger. Luna gulped.
 
Feeling magic swell in her horn, she reached out with the biggest invisible hooves she could possibly imagine. Feeling the energy bubble in her horn, she tried to bridge the gap between her and the moon, but it was much too far. Her magic couldn’t reach further than a few thousand feet.
 
“Keep trying,” Discord said. “You’re almost getting it.”
 
Trying to ignore the dull ache in her horn, Luna reached the big invisible hooves even further. Her magic touched the moon, but barely, and it wouldn’t hold for long. The invisible arms strained, thinning like noodles as her horn burned in pain, and she had to release her magic. Panting, she flopped to the ground. “I can’t do it, Discord,” she said. “It’s too far, and too big.”
 
“What are you talking about?” Discord said, pointing at the moon. “I swear by Charon’s rotten old paddle that the moon wasn’t that high when you started.” This was true, although it was by Discord’s doing, not Luna’s. He thought the little tyke might like to catch a small magical break.
 
Luna followed Discord’s finger, gaping when she saw the moon. The sliver of moon visible now was almost twice as wide as it was before. She didn’t think it was real at first, that she had actually succeeded, but the more she thought she might’ve, the more joy fizzed up inside her, and the more she wanted to jump and yell.
 
“The moon moved!” She hopped and bounded in glee, saying to Discord, “Did you see that? It moved! I moved it!” Finally, after all her hard work, years of practicing magic with little to no success before, she had moved the moon. She had never felt so charged, so giddy, so proud, so alive!
 
But before she could celebrate any more, a strong force grabbed hold of her horn. The electrifying feeling surged in Luna’s body, every strand of hair in her fur standing on end. Luna threw her head back as massive amounts of light and energy shot forth from her forehead.
 
Discord stood still as a statue, watching Luna struggle and squirm in raw power, as an intense beam of magic discharged at the moon, enshrouding it in raw magic. With seemingly no resistance, the moon glided up the night sky, coming to rest when it was fully above the skyline.
 
The magical torrent from Luna’s horn ceased, and she collapsed on the grass. Discord zipped up to her, since it was now safe to go near her. He scooped her up, but she lay limp in his arms. Discord whispered, “Luna? You’re not dead, right?”
 
Luna opened her eyes, completely worn out. In her hazy vision, Discord materialized, his brows turned up in surprise, his voice distant and soothing. “Hi,” she said.
 
Hearing her faint voice, Discord let out the breath he had been holding. He looked up at the moon in the sky, laughing to himself. What a night. In lying to a child, he had accidentally activated cutie mark magic and made her realize her destiny.
 
“What is it?” Luna asked, trying to clear her vision by blinking.
 
Discord lifted Luna up to see the moon. “You did it, kid,” he said. “I’m proud of you.”
 
Luna marvelled at the moon, shining bright and high in the sky, enormous as ever and more beautiful than anything she’d ever seen before. And she did it. She had raised the moon, all by herself. Without a doubt, this was the most wonderful night she’d ever known. She smiled, tears forming at the corners of her eyes.
 
She pulled herself closer to Discord’s fuzzy chest, hugging him. “Thank you, Discord.”
 
“Don’t mention it,” Discord said, discovering an unusual substance lingering in the corner of his eye, likely his eye’s natural reaction to the wind. He strode inside the castle, off to tuck in the little celestial-body-mover. Tricia remained outside, sleeping in the grass, tired out from the excitement.
 
Discord wasn’t about to mention the small moon cutie mark Luna now displayed on both flanks. That could wait for tomorrow. For now, she needed rest.
 

~ ~ ~

 
Celestia sat at breakfast. She hadn’t spoken a word to anypony since she got back from her parents’ house.
 
Her parents were gone. There was no sign of them left at their house. Their cloud bedroom, cloud closet, cloud cupboards—all empty. Nopony at the cloud kingdom transportation centre could tell her anything about her parents’ whereabouts. They hadn’t even left a note, only a cloud “For Sale” sign lodged in the front yard.
 
There was nothing to fall back on, now. It was just Celestia, and no one to help her manage a maniacal babysitter and a spoiled sister, plus her subjects or whatever.
 
Eating her breakfast now was an automatic function—she was too jittery to actually feel hungry. Celestia transferred another spoonful of oatmeal to her mouth as she thought about where her parents were, why her parents had left without telling her, did she still have to trim the cloud hedges while they were gone—questions that three hours of fitful sleep couldn’t answer.
 
“Morning,” Luna said, much more chipper than usual as she trotted by Celestia.
 
Celestia stared at Luna as she walked past, not noticing that by where her sister had entered the room, she had taken the long way around from her bedroom to the Royal Dining Hall. No, Celestia’s gaze was fixated right at Luna’s flank. Formerly blank, it now bore a simple, white crescent moon.
 
If that wasn’t proof enough that she had raised the moon last night, Luna exhibited an unusually snarky attitude. The way she practically skipped to her seat at the table, the way she smiled, the way she asked for strawberry jam where before she had eaten her toast plain.
 
Celestia started to shake, not only due to fear and fatigue, but now anger as well. She tried to keep her tone as level as possible. “You raised the moon last night.”
 
Luna nodded. “Uh huh. I raised it all by myself. Didja see my new cutie mark?” She turned and stood on her tiptoes to show off her flank.
 
“Yes,” Celestia said, not bothering to look again. Her jaw clenched as she stared at the breakfast in front of her—toast and oatmeal. From a staff this incompetent, this is what she had come to expect of a Royal Breakfast.
 
Luna took a large bite of her toast. “Well, since you have a sun cutie mark and I have a moon cutie mark, I figure now we can do a rotation, you know? Like, you raise the sun, I raise the moon. Cuts your work in half. And I mean, I don’t mind, I’m totally fine with raising the moon, it’s not even a chore at all to me. We could raise the sun and moon from separate rooms, too, ‘cause that’s okay with me if you prefer—”
 
“I told Mom and Dad last night,” Celestia lied, staring hard at Luna.
 
Luna’s eyes widened in surprise. She stopped chewing her toast and swallowed. The excitement from her late night escapades died down, now turning into regret. Of course Celestia would’ve seen her raising the moon. Of course she would’ve gotten mad. But telling their parents… Luna knew she was in for it now. “It was Discord, I swear,” she said.
 
“Discord doesn’t have the moon cutie mark, does he?” Celestia said, folding her arms.
 
Luna didn’t break eye contact. “Discord told me to.”
 
Celestia leaned forward and pressed her hooves together. “Mom and Dad told me that you’re grounded to your room for three days.”
 
Luna’s jaw dropped. “Huh? They did not!”
 
“Yes,” Celestia said, wondering if there was something else she could add to that to make it more of a complete punishment. Her mind wandered to her date that night, and she had an idea. “And they also said to take away your journal.”
 
“What? Why?” Luna stood up.
 
Celestia shrugged. Mom was to blame for this, not her, and Mom wasn’t even at home. “Mom said I was in charge. You have to listen to what I say. I told you not to raise the moon. You didn’t listen.”
 
“But you said it was because my magic wasn’t strong enough. And look!” Luna levitated her spoon, then her fork, then the candelabra in the middle of the table. “Look! I can do it now!”
 
“I don’t care, Luna,” Celestia said, stiffening her jaw. “I’m the sovereign ruler. Raising the sun and moon is my responsibility, not yours.”
 
“But, Tia—”
 
“SILENCE!” Celestia erupted in a full Royal Voice. No, Celestia, count to ten. Count to ten. She counted up to ten, relaxing her shoulders and clearing her throat. “Do not call Us Tia. As princess of this castle, We command that thou must finish thy breakfast and depart to thy room at once and fetch the journal.”
 
Luna gawked at Celestia. Never had she expected things to go this badly. She looked down at her half-eaten toast, losing her hunger, but eventually finding the courage to speak. “You used the Royal Voice. On me.”
 
Celestia lifted a spoonful of oatmeal to her mouth, chewing slowly, like a princess. She swallowed, looking back at her sister and waving her spoon in the air as she spoke. “If thou should choose to act like a subject, then thou shalt be treated as such.” She jerked her spoon toward the hallway. “Go to thy room and fetch thy journal.”
 
It was Luna’s turn to shiver in anger. She threw her toast down on the plate, then picked up her spoon in her magic and slapped that down, then rose from the table, then picked up her toast and threw it down again for emphasis. She stomped out of the room, her stomps eventually getting quieter as she went to her room and the Royal Dining Hall growing silent.
 
It was then that Celestia noticed the sound of scribbling. “Scribe,” she said.
 
Sweating, Clover stopped writing, hoping she could hide behind the ensuing silence. Celestia was mad, though, so Clover didn’t want to further anger her by delaying a response by too long. “Yes?”
 
Celestia stared at her, overwhelmingly tired from a sour date, barely any sleep, and having to use the Royal Voice on something other than decrees. She seized the scroll from Clover, tearing it in half five times. “Thou art fired.”
 
Clover nodded, fleeing from the room. Once the rest of the staff heard of this, they arranged a meeting to discuss unionizing. One mare pointed out that the daughter of omnipotent beings was on edge, and so if the staff were to go on strike, the princess may resort to smiting. Nopony knew if such a thing as smite insurance existed, so all agreed that perhaps it would be best not to annoy the princess, and if she became angry, to stay still in case she only saw movement.
 
Celestia waited in the Royal Dining Hall, tapping her hooves together. She’d never had the power to punish her sister before, actually, and although it did feel right to exert it, she was trembling from it. She now not only had responsibility, but power, and that was scary by itself.
 
No one was above her, now. No one was here to tell her how she was doing, nor to confirm she had done all her chores today, or even if she’d done them properly. Was grounding her sister for three days a suitable punishment, or would three weeks be more appropriate? Ruling a kingdom was easy, in theory, but now she wished she had some guidance, at least somepony who had done this before. For the first time in many years, she wished Star Swirl was here to guide her.
 
She didn’t even have a scribe anymore. Celestia was all alone now, and she couldn’t decide if this was liberating or a catastrophe waiting to happen.
 
Luna came plodding back, Star Swirl’s journal floating above her head. She hurled it on the ground in front of Celestia, then turned around with a ‘hmph’ and stormed out.
 
Celestia had barely noticed her sister’s behaviour, only seeing the journal now before her. She picked it up, smoothing over the cover with her hoof. This was her ticket to peace of mind.
 
She didn’t have to be alone. Sombra could guide her. He was the ideal solution. He was experienced, certainly; he’d probably been a king for at least more than two days. Also, not only was he a charmer inside and out, but she could turn to him for help at any time, once they were married and all that.
 
There was literally no other option: she had to win him over. Thus, there was only one thing left to do at this point, and that was study spells.
 
She cleared her throat. “Cancel Our plans, clear Our calendar for the day,” she said out loud, then realized that she did not yet have a Royal Calendar. “Scribe, devise a Royal Calendar for Us,” she said, then remembered she no longer had a scribe. In fact, she was completely alone in the room, and had been speaking to no one at all.
 
Fine. She didn’t need to speak to anypony, anyway. She flipped open the journal to the rearmost pages, filled with the complicated spells. If Sombra was looking for a high something of magical somethings, he was going to witness the highest something of magical somethings she could muster.