//------------------------------//
// Shut Up And Drive 
// Story: There's Nopony I'd Rather Be Than Me 
// by Tatsurou 
//------------------------------//

	The live fire test went down with other members of Calhoun's unit recording data.  Wily focused his attention on trying to analyze Nightmare Moon's abilities.  However, this proved difficult, as the 'decoding' aspect seemed to be continuous at this stage, and any device he built and coded to analyze her abilities became irreparably damaged by the analysis, leaving no data to be examined.

Eventually, he was forced to fall back on what his own senses were able to tell him, speculation based on what few details Moony was able to provide, and the research Uncle had provided for him.  The conclusions he was able to reach this way were unsatisfying, not to mention disturbing.

Eventually, he brought his observations to a halt as Moony started getting irritable.  "The Queen of the Night hungers!" she proclaimed angrily.  "We desire sustenance, and we desire it now!"

"Ralph!" Albert called out.  "I think you'd better take her home.  She's complaining of being hungry."  He scratched his chin.  "Which is strange, since sprites don't actually need to eat..."

"I can get her some food in Sugar Rush," Ralph pointed out, scooping her up.  "I want to introduce her to Vanellope, anyway."

"See you later, Ralph!" Felix called, waving him goodbye just before getting hit by a rocket to the torso.  As soon as he landed, he whacked himself upside the head with his golden hammer, fixing all damage.

Chuckling, Ralph waved goodbye to everyone else.  "Say goodbye to our friends, Moony," he instructed.

"Fight for your Queen's entertainment, peasants!" Nightmare proclaimed, startling laughter from everyone who didn't suffer from SHS(1).





Nightmare Moon's eyes nearly popped out of her head as she witnessed Sugar Rush.  Sure, it was bright and colorful, which didn't really appeal to her tastes.  However, given how hungry she was, something else of much greater importance caught her attention.

"The entire world is made of candy!" she shrieked happily, leaping into the scenery to begin filling her belly.

"Now don't overeat!" Ralph called out a warning.  "We've got a long way to go, and you can't race on a full stomach!"

Moony lifted her head from a pool of chocolate she had been slurping from, the brown ooze dripping off her face.  "Race?"

"Yeah, Sugar Rush is a racing game," Ralph replied.  "I figured after we met up with Vanellope, we could make you your own kart to use, and then do a quick no items race just for fun."

Nightmare grinned widely at the idea.  "But why no items?"

"Because you aren't from this game, and I don't want to risk you turning permanently into a slice of pie just because a scoop of ice cream lands on you," Ralph explained.  "After all, we don't have your game of origin to reset your code with."

Moony shrugged.  "Fair point."  She then dashed off looking for something else to eat.

"Moony!" Ralph complained, racing to keep up with her.

After a time, another voice startled him into running faster.  "Hey!  Quit eating my racer you stupid horse!"

"I am no stupid horse!" Moony countered.  "I am Nightmare Moon, Queen of the Night!"

"Well it's daytime, so get off my wheels before I a la mode you!"

"Brave words from a knave!" Moony shouted.  "I shall smite thee with magic beyond thy ken!"

"Vanellope!  Moony!  Cut it out!" Ralph shouted out, rushing to the scene of the argument.  Vanellope and Nightmare Moon were giving each other death glares as Moony was gripping one of the wheels on Vanellope's race cart, looking ready to rip it off and eat it.

"Ralphy!" Vanellope complained.  "Get this stupid horse off my racer!"

"Daddy!" Moony complained at the same time.  "Make the stupid girl give me the tasty food!"

Both froze as they heard each others words.

"Daddy?"

"Ralphy?"

Ralph groaned.  "Moony, this is Vanellope, the friend I wanted to introduce you to.  Vanellope, this is Nightmare Moon...my daughter."  He braced himself for the awkwardness that was sure to come.

Both females backed off, looking embarrassed.  "Talk about bad first impressions," Vanellope joked.

"Well, if you'd just let me take a nibble..."

"Hey, Ralph helped me make this car!  Nobody's taking a bite out of it on my watch!"

Moony hung her head.  "...sorry..."

Vanellope chuckled.  "I know it's been a while, Ralph, but I wasn't expecting this kind of changes!  I mean, isn't it the woman's job in the relationship to be out of contact for a while and then show up with the unexpected child?"

"Wha-bu-I-" Ralph stammered, her question catching him so off guard that all he could do was babble incoherently.

Moony looked up at Vanellope with doleful eyes.  "Are...are you my Mommy?" she asked sorrowfully.

Vanellope chuckled.  "Sure, I'll be your Mommy!  Makes sense for a Princess to mother a Queen."  Reaching over, she gently scratched Nightmare Moon behind one ear.

As Ralph groaned in frustration, Moony giggled.  "Daddy's funny when he gets verklempt, isn't he?"

Vanellope giggled.  "I like you already, squirt!"  She began scratching just a little more firmly.

Moony closed her eyes in pleasure.  "Fingernails..." she moaned happily.

Ralph shook his head ruefully.  "Well, as long as you two are getting along," he allowed.

"Hop in, Moony!" Vanellope said happily.  "We're gonna make you a racer!  Then we're going to see if you're as much of a racer as your Mom!"

Squealing happily, Moony hopped into the kart with Vanellope, who promptly gunned the engine.  Groaning, Ralph took off after them.  Thankfully, the Candy Constabulary gave him a lift before he fell too far behind.





At the factory, Vanellope gestured around at the kart options.  "Pick the design you think will suit you best!" she said happily.

Grinning, Moony ran towards one of the less used designs, nearly flat with flaring wings.

"Hmm," Vanellope mused.  "Low max speed, high acceleration and drift, low weight, and boostable...interesting choice."  She raced in after Nightmare, gesturing to the controls.  "Now get all the good stuff into the batter and none of the bad!"

Smiling, Nightmare energized her horn, grabbing every ingredient as they came out the chutes and sending the good stuff into the bowl and the bad stuff into the trash.  "I did the right stuff, right?"

"That's right!" Vanellope proclaimed.  "Now you need to keep it at the right temperature while baking!"

Grinning, Nightmare pumped the bellows to maintain the temperature until the oven went ding.

Ralph came into the factory just as they got to the toppings.  "Four wheels!" Vanellope proclaimed.

Grinning, Nightmare fired off the gun to drop in the four wheels.  Turning to the frosting, she dumped dark blue blueberry and black super dark chocolate.  She then dropped in a bunch of tiny white sprinkles.

"Here's your racer!" the factory voice proclaimed as the time ran out, and the door opened.

The machine that rolled out was sleek and smooth, stark contrast to many racers that had come out before.  The bottom and wheels were a very dark blue, while the top was near pitch black and speckled with the tiny white sprinkles.  The afterburners flared out from the back as the engine purred.  Yellow gumdrop headlights looked like glowing eyes.  With the flared wings on the sides, it looked like a chunk of the night sky had come to life as a manta ray to swim onto the race track.

"Whoa..." Vanellope breathed as she stared at the race kart.

"That's...wow..." Ralph admitted, staring at it.

Nightmare Moon grinned.  "I love it!" she proclaimed, cackling wickedly.  "I shall call it...the Dream Eater!"

Vanellope grinned.  "Let's see how you race!"  She raced to her own kart.

Cackling again, Moony leapt into the Dream Eater, her horn glowing as she manipulated the stick, pushing the pedals with her hind hooves as she clutched the steering wheel with her fore hooves.

"From here to Cola Mountain!" Ralph proclaimed, drawing the course on a nearby map.  "I'll meet you there!"

With that, the pair revved off into a race.








(1) Silent Hero Syndrome: Some hero sprites are, unfortunately, programmed to never speak for some reason.  Within their games, this generally causes no problems as the world around them is programmed to take it into account.  Outside their own game, however, this causes a great deal of problems in communication.  However, most arcade residents do their best to be understanding and welcoming of such sprites, finding a way to communicate with them, mostly via charades, and occasionally written dialogue.