Dearest Sister:
Thou art so nice when talking to interdimensional bald apes. Thou could really be nicer to thy own family (and thy people).
Sincerely, Luna.
Dear Princess Moonbutt:
Don’t get your hopes up. Celestia only opens portals to other dimensions when she gets really drunk. Sometimes the alcohol makes her nicer than usual.
Sincerely, Discord.
Dear Ash:
So, you can get a bunch of rare candies if you use an old man and a beach? Well, I may not have either of those, but I do know an old donkey, and I also know a nice pool. I'm going to experiment!
Sincerely, Pinkie Pie.
Dear Pikachu:
Why are you so willing to accept that monkey’s dominion over you? I mean, I can’t escape Twilight because she has magic, and she’ll throw me into the fairy pit if I try to resist her. What about you? The Monkey doesn’t have any magic, and he doesn’t even lock you up into those prison balls! So what gives?!
Sincerely, Spike.
Dear Princess Celestia:
However, a cursory glance led me to realize that I was looking at the wrong version of Equestria. So if anything or anyone managed to communicate with your world, I offer my apologies.
Sincerely, Arceus, lord and god of all Pokémon.
Dear Applejack:
Future champion of the Kanto Equestria region, Apple Bloom.