//------------------------------// // ... And that how Equestria was made! // Story: when slenderman left me in paradise // by Jimbob //------------------------------// [Knight] {Me} “So basically what you’re telling me is that all the Greek gods are real?” “Why do you keep calling them ‘Greek’ gods?” “Elementary my dear Luna because they’re from Greece next question please!” she shot me a look that said ‘and just HOW many times were you dropped on your head?’ simple answer is lots! “What’s this Greece you speak of?” GAAH I don’t have the patience’s too play twenty questions, especially when I wasn’t getting any of my answers. “The place where Greek mythology began, now if I can ask a question-” “Mythology?! The gods shall smite those who insult them!” and then she skittered backwards from me, obviously waiting for impending lightning bolt demise. After a few seconds of lighting freeness I continued on with my ramble. “Right, so anyway first question; how do you know about Zeus and Poseidon and the rest of the gang.” Now if I was a god getting called a gang was a pretty quick way for them to earn some horrible demise, like falling down the up escalator or something. Yes, yes I know my evil knows no bounds. Celestia just giggled leaving me a bit confused until I remembered the whole mind reading thing. {I still haven’t forgiven you~} [Huh?] {You and I will be having words at a later date about the whole ‘Trust me bro, killing the Princess is a great idea’ thing} [It’s your fault too, you know] {How so?} [Well we live in the same body and mind, so when you get pissed I get pissed the only thing is I tend to take things a little too far] {You don’t say?} [Shut up that’s as close as I’m getting to apologizing] {What’s that? You’re terribly sorry? I suppose if the Princess is willing to forgive you I can find it in my heart to forgive you, what do you say Princess?} I looked over towards Celestia who gave an almost invisible nod. {Congrats! Princess of the sun forgives you for saving the kingdom and almost killing her} [I really do hate you] {Mutual feeling! Remember? Same mind, same feelings! Mostly, I normally don’t have an overbearing desire to kill everything} “Hello~? You still in there?” Luna said while knocking on my head with a hoof. “Nobodies home! We don’t want any!” this got a giggle out of both of them. Score one for the home team! “Anyway to answer your question, well EquestriawasmadebyPoseidon.” She just spat out the last part at a speed that would make a minigun blush. “But, but-” IMPOSSIBRU! This went against every fan fiction I had ever read. But wait, in Greek mythology Poseidon had created horses. Did he create ponies? If so why create a whole other world when they were already on earth? GAAHHH the questions! “JAKE! Slow down!” Celestia was holding her head in her hooves, which was impressive since she was still standing normally, what black magic is this!? “Ok too answer your questions 1: yes Poseidon created ponies 2: yes they were on earth first, but Poseidon was not happy with the way the humans treated them, thus with the help of the other gods he created a whole new world for us too live peacefully on.” ARGH my brain can’t handle the levels of wut! [How did you not know this stuff?] {YOU KNEW?} [Well, yeah I’m a demon I do have some history of life in the underworld.] {AND YOU NEVER THOUGHT TO TELL ME?} [WELL YOU NEVER ASKED!] I slammed my head into my pillow continuously. Luna made a move to stop me but Celestia put a hoof and gave me a look like ‘Come on man! It’s not that hard to accept that mythological gods created a bunch of sentient ponies, oh and then made a TV show about them’. Fuck that yes it was. After a few more minutes of forehead versus pillow action I finally stopped and turned back to Celestia. “So Poseidon created Equestria, to keep his little ponies safe,” I can honestly say I never thought I would arrange those words together in a paragraph let alone a sentence, let alone one that makes sense! “And they were originally from earth?” “Yes that about sums it up” HOW IS THIS SO NORMAL? “Yeah, but then my brain started hurting and I realized that I was still dreaming and woke up still face down in a puddle of blood, RIGHT?” Celestia gave me that same look. “No not right, now answer my question why were you marked by Hades?” my brain still being jumbled by my recent revelations let loose a terribly simple answer. “Oh I don’t know something about Defender of Equestria.” “WHAT!?” my brain rebooted and then said ‘you’re on your own buddy’ when he saw the mess I made. “Well fine fuck you too brain” I muttered darkly then I faced the shocked Princess who seemed to being flipping between ‘are you insane?’ and ‘oh gods help us” looks. “Yep long story short, I had a dream-talk with Hades, I guess, and basically defend Equestria or your friend’s die, so I accepted begrudgingly.” “But what could possibly force us to require your help?” Queen of the changelings! Celestia shot me a dirty look while I chuckled. “He didn’t say, but I mean I figure it can’t be too hard to figure out.” Or it could be I have all of no idea. “Jake the least you could do is not lie to us.” “CELESTIA! I am insulted that you would assume I’m lying! I am simply stretching the truth to fit my needs!” “Or lying” “Or that” I chuckled. “So does being the Defender of Equestria get me any perks?” come on mansion, daddy needs a new mansion! “I suppose I could forgive you for attempting to kill me.” And I lost it all, shouldn’t have bet it all on black. “Fine I’ll settle for that, for now” I mumbled and then my stomach groaned loudly announcing its desire for nourishment. The Princess giggled at my, BAH! Disregard wrenches, acquire pastries! I began to get out of the bed when a bright yellow aura forced me back down. “Oh no you don’t! You’re still healing!” Healing from what!? I don’t recall taking too many hits from changelings, than again that whole thing was basically blood and guts in my memory. “You’re in the hospital because you went into a coma for about two days.” WHAT? TWO DAYS? WHY WAS I IN A COMA? “JAKE! Calm down you were in a coma because you spent way too much energy well, killing things.” But …… well fuck. “Fine but if I stay here then I demand muffins!” “Fine, fine.” Celestia giggled “come on Luna” she said as she led her little sister out of the room. “Better be blueberry” I mumbled