Act 1
Scene 1
If you searched long and hard and had just a bit of luck on your side there might be a small chance that you would stumble upon a rather magical realm. A place a whimsy and beauty and delight. A land that seemed to come straight out of a fairy tale, filled with a wide array of strange and colorful characters. A place where it was hard not to smile and just enjoy life! What, you ask, is the name of this mythical place?
FINNISH SINGERS (dressed in traditional Finnish clothing)
Finland, Finland, Finland
That's the country for me!
(VARIOUS ANIMAL NOISES)
MAYOR:
Finland is the country where we dance
Finland is the country where we play
Here in Finland boy and girl can find a true romance
In traditional Scandinavian vay!
ALL:
Schlip! Schlap!
MAYOR:
Schlip-a-schlap-a vay
ALL:
Schlip! Schlap!
MAYOR:
Schlap away all day
ALL:
Schlip! Schlap!
MAYOR:
You simply can't go wrong
Vith traditional fish-schlapping song
ALL:
Finland, Finland, Finland
MEN:
The country where I quite want to be
SOLOIST 1:
Outdoor trekking-
SOLOIST 2:
Or camping-
ALL:
Or just watching TV
Finland, Finland, Finland
That's the country for me
defender2222 (spoken):
But this story doesn’t take place in Finland.
COMPANY (spoken in tandem):
What? Oh, sorry, sorry about that
No, our story takes place in another magical place filled with whimsy and wonder: Equestria. Now, if one were to look at Equestria they would be forgiven for thinking it quite different from our world. For starters the Manehattan Mets are actually a good team that has won several World Series and had never disappointed their fans by failing repeatedly, over and over, until one wonders if it isn’t some cosmic joke upon the few loyal idiots that still support the team.
Also there are the talking colorful ponies.
But while it is true that this world was filled with pegasi, unicorns and earth ponies (who kinda got the raw end of the deal when it came to naming rights, I suppose), there are many similarities between their world and ours. One of the key ones is that just like in our world the day of December 25th is considered to be a very important day. This day, like in our world, is a wonderful holiday that celebrates love and family and giving. While our holiday is known as Christmas the little ponies call it Hearth’s Warming Day and hold it as the founding of their country and when the magic of friendship was first discovered.
But more important than the day is the one that comes before. Hearth’s Warming Eve. This is a day of entertainment and excitement! In every town and city and hamlet plays are put on telling the tale of the Founding of Equestria. It is a timeless tale filled with over the top characters, scary villains, and a message that all should keep in their hearts not just on one day, but all days. In fact, one would say the play might be perfect if not for a small detail.
It was dull.
This had nothing to do with the story itself, of course. One might think that such an old tale, passed down from generation to generation, would grow stale and out of date as the years went on. But it is a testament to the strength of this yarn that it endures and even now the youngest of ponies, upon hearing it for the first time, are entranced.
It isn’t the fault of the players either. Honestly, in Equestria it didn’t matter how talented the person was who put on the play, it was still enjoyed. Sometimes it was a father, using his magic to make puppets dance for his children while momma put the finishing touching of the Hearth’s Warming dinner. Other times it was whole communities taking turns with the roles and design… in fact there were a few small villages where the audience was less than that of those who put on the play. And in the great cities like Los Pegasus or Fillydelphia the finest thespian actors would perform shows with such power and amazement that one could be excused for believing they were looking through a mirror into the past.
But even so… it was dull.
The reason is simple: the tale had told so many times that most adults knew it by heart. They could still lose themselves in it but they knew the ending. Rather than inciting excitement and wonder all that was brought about… was a nostalgic feeling. This wasn’t a bad thing, mind you, but it was lacking.
So it was that this year Princess Celestia decided that something a bit different needed to be done. She announced to the thrill of her subjects that she would be providing funds to allow for Hearth’s Warming Eve to become an entire day dedicated to the theater. The Founding Play would still go on, of course, no one was going to say for even a moment that it shouldn’t. but in addition there would be other performances to fill the time and give families something else to do. It was achance to recapture magic as well as open ponies’ eyes to other things they might not have tried before.
Well, her subjects instantly supported such an idea! Different groups quickly formed and other plays and tales were selected. Some were brand new pieces that would have their very first viewing that day. Others were classics themselves but were given new life thanks to this holiday performance. Many actors found themselves being cast in multiple plays and delighted in the chance to spend the afternoon and evening slipping from one guise to the next like a changeling.
In the city of Canterlot, which is the capital of Equestria, this blizzard of plays and performances reached its fevered pitch. Every playhouse was booked full and other buildings were converted to serve such a purpose. They weren’t all grand, of course, far from it, but that actually helped serve to make the entire event more magical. It was a strange and amusing thing to sit in a restaurant or a warehouse or even the large dining room of some wealthy stallion and see it made into a small theater with hoof-made curtains and candles turned into spotlights. Even the castle itself became a theater and it is said that Princess Celestia and Luna dissolved into giggles as their guards put on a special farce for that day.
There was no doubt, however, of what the main attraction would be for the Princesses. Celestia had turned to only one mare to plan and organize the final play the sisters would attend. This mare… was Princess Twilight Sparkle. Though she had little time to do it Twilight accepted the burden with a grin and went to work gathering the actors and scenery and props and scripts needed to put on the performance.
And that, dear reader… is where our story beings.
~LPP~LPP~LPP~
“I must say, I am rather excited to see what Twilight has come up with,” Princess Celestia said as she entered her private luxury box, Luna only a step behind her. “She seemed rather excited about it.”
“That she has, sister,” Luna said. She had been working hard to break herself out of speaking in Old Equestrian and while making good strides still tended to be a touch too formal. Celestia, bless her, never made fun of her for it. “We… I hope she has not worked herself into a… what is the word… fizzy?”
“Tizzy,” Celestia said. “And I hope as much too. I was very careful with my wordings, so that she understood that this was not some grand event that she needed to worry herself sick about.”
“Your student does tend to do such. I remember your tales of how fearful she would get whenever you made an appearance in Ponyville.”
Celestia nodded, letting out a small sigh. “Sometimes I wish she had treated me as she treated you.” When Luna raised an eyebrow at this Celestia smiled. “I don’t mean when you first met… I mean that she never put you on a pedestal. With me she is always so fearful she will do something wrong.”
“But it has gotten better,” Luna pointed out.
“That is true. That is why I asked her to put on this play… to make sure she could handle it without turning it into a massive production.”
“It is a massive production,” Luna said in confusion. "Just look at the cast list..."
“I mean not make it all about me and her worries about what I will think.”
“Ah. You make sense now, sister.” She paused, looking her sister over. “So this is all a test then? Wouldn’t that merely confirm Twilight’s fears about you?”
Celestia had the decency to look abashed. “Not quite a test… more of a chance to prove herself. I am allowed to worry about her, after all, and this is an opportunity for Twilight to prove to me, and more herself, that she can handle something of this nature without losing herself to stress.”
“…did you hide all the tables in a 5 mile radius?”
Celestia let fly a dry chuckle. “No, I did not. I am sure that Twilight will be able to restrain herself from bashing her skull against them.”
“What is that saying… ‘last words of a famous mare’?” Luna used her magic to pick up a program and began to skim through it. “What do you know of this play? This ‘Les Petit Poneys’.” She closed the program and stared at the red and white drawing of a wide-eyed unicorn, the white-lettered title framed by her mane. It was a strange, striking image that held the moon princess’ attention for some time.
Celestia, once she was sure her sister was actually paying attention, began to speak. “It is a musical that takes place in France. I don’t want to ruin it for you but it deals with the ideas of love, loss, freedom, redemption, and moving beyond the past.”
“Heavy topics for a festive holiday.”
“I don’t know about that… sometimes deeper thought works best on light and happy days.” Celestia smiled as she listened to the orchestra begin to tune up. "I believe that this will be a show to remember."
Thunder ominously rumbled around them.
Act 1
Scene 2
"Spike, stop playing with that sound effects machine!"
The baby dragon, wearing a brown jacket over a starched white shirt with high collar, awkwardly pulled his taloned hand away from the wooden box. "Oh, come on Twilight, I was just testing it out! You never know when we might need it!"
"We aren't going to need it," Twilight said, her horn glowing as she pulled out a battered script from her saddle bag and flipped through it. "There are no storms in the play."
"But maybe there should be!" Scootaloo argued. The little filly squirmed as Mrs. Cake dabbed yellow makeup with a small sponge against her coat, making sure that no spot of orange could be seen. A long pink wig sat off to the side, waiting to be placed over her short purple mane. "It could really spice things up."
"Nothing needs to be spiced up," Twilight stated, looking around at the barely control chaos that was occurring around her. Several burly stallions were working to get the scenery placed and ready while Mr. Cake was helping Sweetie Belle with her lines. Last minute makeup touchups were being done and several ponies were going through the rack of costumes, searching for their wardrobes. Just beyond the heavy red curtains Twilight could hear the musicians running through some little tunes and the murmur of the audience as they found their seats. "We are going to present this musical as written, ok?"
"Really?" Applejack said. "Then why am I wearin' this dang thing on my rear?" The farmer was dressed in a blue inspector's uniform. However, the main thing that caught everyone's attention was that her flank and hind legs had been painted a dark green and a prosthetic capricorn tail was attached to her backside. Whenever she flexed her legs the tail would swish about, forcing those around her to leap away lest they get a nice smack.
Twilight blushed. "Ok... so I did alter the species of some of the cast... but that's only because I wanted to diversify things. Make it friendly to everyone, no matter their species."
Spike and several other actors rolled their eyes. They all knew the real reason Twilight had changed Javert to a capricorn and members of the Students' Rebellion to minotaurs and griffins. When Celestia had announced that Hearth's Warming Eve would be a day of theater several troupes from around the globe had decided to truly make it an international event. Series productions from Griffland were putting on plays, including the comedies of Whiny Shakespear. A kaboki group from Neighpon were also putting on a show, as was a troupe of perytons from Reinssa. Singers from Iponia were presenting select works of opera; Rarity had gone to an early showing and raved about it. Even the war-loving capricorns had gotten into the act; no one had been more surprised than Twilight to find out that capricons loved the theater but she'd found their production of Oceanus Rex to be quite interesting, if a bit bloody.
Thus Twilight, knowing that Canterlot would be full of foreigners taking in the plays and experiencing Hearth's Warming for the first time, decided to give Les Petit Poneys a more diverse cast.
"And it really doesn't hurt anything... I mean, its only a few parts that were changed."
"Like Fantine being an alicorn now?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Or how my part is suppose to be played by an earth pony?" When several other actors and actresses looked at her the blue mare bristled. "What, I can't enjoy the theater just because I like sports?"
"No one is saying that. And yes, I did change your part but for good reason! There aren't any pegasus parts in this play!" Twilight complained. "When Victorious Hi-Go wrote it the play was suppose to be about the plight of the earth ponies under a unicorn monarchy. We don't have that in Equestria and besides... I didn't think that type of subject matter would be good for a Hearth's Warming Play."
"But death and war are?" Fluttershy said softly.
Twilight closed her eyes and counted to five before continuing. "The only thing we are changing is the species... the characters will be exactly the same." She paused, glancing over at the door. "Assuming our Valjean and Fantine show up!"
"You want me to take over their parts?" Spike asked, puffing out his chest and looking might proud of himself. "I mean, I know all the roles by heart..."
"We're here, we're here!" Shining Armor called out, racing through the exit door, Cadence fast on his hooves. "Sorry, but we were halfway here when Cadence realized she'd left her dress at the castle. We had to run all the way back there and the extra security meant we couldn't teleport..."
"We're sorry, Twilight," Cadence said. "But we're here now."
"Thank Celestia," Twilight said. Looking around and seeing everyone was there she raised her voice a bit. "Everypony, can you please gather round? I want to say a few words." Twilight looked at the entire cast and smiled. Their numbers included her best friends, her #1 Assistant, her BBBFF, her friend and former foalsitter, and a large array of acquaintances. There were even a few, like Iron Will, who she had only really gotten to know through the production. "I know it has been a rough few weeks getting this all together. We've hit some speed bumps and had some problems but each time we made it through to the other side. I know some of you had your doubts... when we lost five different Mariuses in the span of three days it looked like we were doomed. But Spike, you stepped in and took over the role and for that I am truly thankful."
"No problem, twilight," Spike said proudly. "Its just too bad that those totally accidental and in no way preplanned accidents happened to my victims- I mean the actors I replaced."
Twilight nodded. "And Fluttershy, thank you for being willing to switch parts with Rarity."
"No problem, Twilight," Fluttershy said.
"Wait, what?" Spike excalimed. "But... but Rarity was Cosette!"
The fashionista smiled. "I know, Spike, but I just felt that Eponine was a meatier role. It offered such flare and drama!" She looked over and Fluttershy and smiled. "Sorry, my dear... I think you would have made a fine Eponine but in my heart I know you'll be the best Cosette the stage has ever seen."
Spike looked in dawning horror at Fluttershy. "But... I wanted..." He sat down with a thud and began to tug on his tail. "Aw man!"
"And Rarity," Twilight said, "I want to thank you for creating all these costumes. I know learning two parts wasn't easy and throwing the creation of all these dresses and coats couldn't-"
Rarity laughed. "My dear, it was perfectly fine! I mean, yes, I had to basically inject coffee right into my veins so I could pull 7 all-nighters but seeing you all wearing your perfectly tailored costumes lets me know it was worth it."
Cadence shifted, struggling to get on her first costume. "Uh, Rarity, could you perhaps let this dress-"
"As... I... said..." Rarity snapped, eyes going pure black with red pupils, "perfectly... tailored... costumes."
Every pony shifted awkwardly, not wanting to say a word in case they might say the wrong thing and cause the white unicorn mare to erupt in a fury. Finally Cheese Sandwich cleared his throat. “Well, I for one am happy you let me be a part of this! I can’t wait to go out there and show that audience the brave and heroic Thénardier-“ Iron Will leaned down and whispered in Cheese’s ear. “He’s a what?!?”
Pinkie gasped. “You mean he’s a mean pony? But… that can’t be true! Why would Madame Thénardier marry a-“ Iron Will once again leaned down and whispered. “She’s a what?!?” Pinkie instantly sprang towards Twilight, grabbing her cheeks and pressing her face against her own. “We have to do rewrites! I can’t be a mean pony!”
“If we are doing rewrites can I get some cool fight sequences?”
“I don’t like how my character behaves in scene 7.”
“Maybe we should change some dialogue.”
“I didn’t sign up to make out with Fluttershy!”
“ENOUGH!” Twilight bellowed. “We are not changing anything! We aren’t changing costumes or character motivations or lines or anything! Not another change, you hear me! This is going to be perfect and you all are just going to have to suck it up and go out there and have fun or so help me I will MAKE YOU have fun! We are putting on this play as is and everypony… why are you all staring at me?”
“Uh, Twi?” Applejack said, pointing behind the purple mare. Twilight turned and saw the curtain was open… and the entire audience was staring at them.
“…eep,” Twilight said before rushing off stage, the rest of the cast following her.
“Was that part of the play?” Luna asked.