//------------------------------// // Lost // Story: Not a Monster 2: Under Their Spell // by Dreamscape //------------------------------// Although I slept rather soundly that night, from exhaustion rather than having a peaceful mind, I awoke the next morning feeling much worse. When I arrived at school, the feeling only seemed to grow. I was completely silent throughout my morning classes, lost in my thoughts, and in much too weak of a metal state to say anything worthwhile. The moment I had told Pinkie my feelings, and the way in which she reacted played again and again through my mind. I was growing rather good at picking out the little things, expanding them much larger than they ever should have been, and blaming what happened upon myself. All I wanted to do was go home, but at the same time, I knew I had to stay strong. Firstly, I did not want to show Pinkie how much her decision had truly affected me to keep her from hurting. Along with that, I had plenty to catch up on considering how little homework I had done over the previous weeks. Then, all too soon, came the dreaded hour of lunch. I contemplated sitting with Pinkie and the girls, but knew it would be too much. Along with keeping calm around her, I also worried what the other girls thought of me after I had spent so much time with their enemies. Even though I told Pinkie I was wrong by spending my time with them, I did not want to sit alone. Along with that, I had the urge to return; something about the thought of being around them once more was drawing me back. “Whoa! Not seeing us for a day really did make you sad. I was joking when I said that, you know,” Sonata said in her usual clueless but chipper tone as I took a seat beside her. I thought I was doing a rather good job of keeping my emotions locked deep inside myself, but the fact that Sonata could see it immediately made me wince. “Yeah, sure,” I attempted to joke after clearing my throat. “Great, you’re really lightening the mood,” Aria said with a dry, sarcastic sigh. “Is something up?” I asked, figuring by her sentence that the mood was already low. “Yeah, you, depressing people really get on my nerves,” she said, rolling her eyes. Sonata laughed. “Are you really that stupid? He’s not an emo, Aria.” “Doesn’t mean he isn’t moping,” Aria replied with a shrug, “and I’m no idiot.” “Yeah, I just… well… never mind,” I mumbled weakly. I was rather surprised that Adagio hadn’t said a word to me yet, but then she spoke, her words shocking me even further. “You haven’t done anything to fix whatever it is that you’re whining about, have you?” I was almost certain that I wasn’t whining. “No… but I can’t really-” She lifted a hand, cutting my sentence short. “If you’re not going to toughen up and do something, then don’t whine! Ugh, Aria’s right,” she stated plainly, giving me her fiercest of glares. I could feel myself beginning to tear up and grimaced in an attempt to hold it back. Being yelled at was certainly not good for my already ill heart and only seemed to blow my emotions even further out of proportion than they already were. “Now he’s crying… that makes me feel really awkward. Can you just make him leave or something?” Aria asked, turning to her leader with crossed arms. “Please…” Adagio sighed and placed her hands on the table before me. “She’s right again,” she said, shaking her head belittlingly. “If you’re going to keep acting like this, you need to leave. You can come back when your emotions are more… normal.” I shakily rose to my feet, avoiding any form of eye contact with the girls as tears dripped down my face. In a way, I already knew that even if I was always there for them, they would never do the same for me, but actually experiencing it was much worse. At least before, I could pretend. Now, I knew for a fact that they never actually appreciated my presence. I was being used, even though I was yet to see such using in action besides the petty tasked I did for them. I quickly traveled to the nearest empty table to spend the rest of my lunch in isolation and thought. I immediately realized that sitting with the sirens was the wrong decision, even though I knew so before I had done it. *** The day only seemed to grow worse as my emotional state crumbled even further. Even the slightest of problems were beginning to affect me, whether that be the worry of finishing my homework or how uncomfortable the seats that I had to sit in for an hour were. I craved returning to my home and laying in my bed for the rest of the evening, doing nothing but resting and forgetting about the real world. After a few more painful hours of lecture and work, the end of the day finally arrived. I slowly staggered to my feet and gathered my things as other students sped past me in a blur. Even though I was in a hurry to leave, I had no motivation to do anything which required either physical or mental activity. As I eventually left the room, the halls had already grown eerily silent and lifeless. Looking down at the dulled shine of the polished tile below my feet, scuffed after a day of use, I heard a soft, familiar voice before me. “Hey…” “…Sunset,” I muttered, looking up at her in fear, my eyes growing wide. “It’s, uh, been a while,” she said, nervously fiddling with her fingers and smiling weakly. “I heard what happened with Pinkie… and sort of saw what happened with you and the sirens. You don’t look good at all, and I can understand why. I’m honestly worried about you.” “Are you really?” A look of shock covered her face, and her mouth hung half open. “I… of course I am. I do still care about you, you know?” “Yeah,” I said with a sarcastic laugh and then gulped, surprised by my hostility. “You really think I don’t?” she asked, annoyed and offended by my response. “I mean… please, I don’t want this to turn into some kind of fight. As a friend, I’m worried and wanted to know if I can do anything to help,” she explained, her voice growing softer once more. I shook my head and glared at her. “No… someone like you can’t fix any of this.” “Someone like me? What do you mean, someone like me?” she said, her voice growing louder. “Nothing, never mind… and no, you can’t help.” “Are you sure?” she asked, placing a hand upon my shoulder. I quickly pushed it away and huffed. “Just… leave me alone, alright?” I muttered, returning my gaze to the floor. “Please… I got to know you pretty well when we, um, dated… and I feel like I can help. I know you need it too.” I shook my head once again, this time more fiercely. “No, you don’t. You never had the time too because you were always so caught up in your image.” “My image, really?” she gasped in anger. I looked up for a moment to see her face growing red with rage. “I was just trying to become a better person.” “No, you just wanted everyone to like you again!” I yelled, once again surprising myself. “I was one of the few that actually cared for you, and after you finally got what you wanted, you just abandoned me.” It was as if all of the emotions that I had let well up inside me that day finally burst when they were boiled by an almost forgotten and painful past. I felt unable to control myself, even though I knew what I was doing was completely wrong. I could not believe that the words I said were coming from my own mouth. “No, it was never that! You know you’re lying! Did you ever take a minute to think about how hard it was for me back then?” “Yeah, you know what? I did all of the time actually! I worried about it a lot, and I’m pretty sure I was always there for you, even when you started to forget about me.” “I!” she yelped and then grew silent, grasping the bridge of her nose between her fingers and wincing. “I’m just going to stop now…” “There he is,” a voice called out from behind me, causing both Sunset and I to look in the direction from which it came. The sirens walked towards us through the completely empty hall, the clicks and clacks of their boots against the tile surface echoing around us. “Is he really with Sunset again?” Aria asked, even though it sounded more like a statement with her practically lifeless voice. “I can’t believe it,” Adagio said, glaring in my direction before shaking her head. As she grew close enough to do so, she grasped her hand around my chin and squeezed, causing me to flinch. She stared directly into my eyes with her own, both fierce but welcoming at the same time. “I guess if I was in your shoes, I’d do the same,” she said with a smirk. “Looks like I’ve taught you well… that doesn’t mean you’re off my bad side though… yet. Let’s make a deal, hm?” she cooed sweetly releasing her grasp and tickling her fingers lightly against my chin as she pulled away. “Break Sunset’s heart. Tell her how you would never be in a relationship with her again, and how you don’t want to be her friend any longer. Tell her how you’ve found girls like us who are better than to her in every possible way.” “What am I getting out of this?” I asked, completely entranced by her soft, lulling words. She began to giggle and smiled a vicious smile. “I know how interested you are in each of us. If you do as I ask, we’ll let you have a, well, a heated night with whichever one of us you choose… or being the lover-boy that you are, you can have the girlfriend of your choosing.” “Girlfriend… really?” Aria asked with a huff, crossing her arms. “Come on, Aria, you know it’s totes not like that. You could get your own personal slave! Err… I mean, uh, he’s so nice that he’ll probably do anything you ask. Besides, it’s not like he’s gonna pick you anyways!” Sonata explained. “You’re the worst, Sonata; why would he pick you over me?” “You’re worser! And because I know he’s, like, really into me,” Sonata snapped back. “Girls, please,” Adagio said with a grin, laughing. “We all know he would pick me.” “You know what? Have fun choosing!” Sunset suddenly yelled, glaring at me as she stomped away. “Because I honestly don’t want to be your friend anymore anyways!” Everything was silent as we watched her storm away. Only seconds after she had disappeared, the meaning of what she had said finally hit me. My body felt both empty and heavy at the same time. I had lost a friend. Even if we rarely talked, it was nice to know how much she cared about me, then suddenly, she was gone. The weight of the words which I had spat out through pure emotion and rage were finally catching up to me as I realized that I was the only cause for such a loss. I regretted everything that I had done, and was continuously wishing that I could take it all back. Yet, at the same time, I had always wanted a fresh start, and with both Pinkie and Sunset out of the way, I could finally do so without any baggage. Though, such a new start was completely dependent upon the sirens. “So… do I still get to, uh?” I muttered to them, shaking myself from my thoughts and turning to them, my eyes still wide with shock. All three of them began laughing and sneering, staring at me as if I was some kind of idiot. My expression grew from hopeful to confused, and then to worried. “Did you really think that we would actually be willing to do something like that with someone like you?” Adagio said with a mischievous smile. “I actually thought you were better than this. I figured you’d at least give us some kind of a challenge. Were you really never smart enough to realize that we were using you? You were our final strike against Sunset Shimmer, but it looks like she’s grown immune.” “To put it more bluntly, we don’t need you anymore,” Aria said, flicking a finger against my chin and giving me a wink. I had always known since the moment I made my choice that such a situation was bound to happen at some point. I had grown so blinded by their charm though, that I figured I could at least get something out of such a relationship first. I eventually grew so blind that I grew hopeful, promising myself that my relationship with the sirens could work out, and that perhaps something good would come out of it. Out of the desperation caused by knowing I had lost everything, I turned to my last hope, Sonata. “Too bad, so sad!” she exclaimed, her laugh in the same evil tone as the others. She punched a fist against my shoulder and stuck out her tongue as if it was actually a time to be playful. My entire body felt weak, as if I was about to crumple to the floor as I watched the girls walk away, still laughing at my despair. I swore for a moment that I saw Sonata glance back with what looked to be a frown, but it was much too quick to be sure, and I had no hope left to assume that it was real. In only two days, I had completely lost everything that I held or once held dear to my heart. Out of my own stupidity, I had lost Sunset Shimmer as a friend. I had also finally seen who the sirens were and what they truly thought of me. Of course, I still had Pinkie, but what I wanted most, I discovered was likely never going to happen. Along with that, I felt as though things between us would be much too awkward. I wanted to stay strong for her, continue being her friend, but at the same time, I was unsure if I could handle being in her presence any longer. My life had taken a turn for a place which I had always feared it would. I was alone, friendless, and lost. I knew that I had to change it, and that I was the only one who could, but was completely oblivious as to how.