//------------------------------// // Epilogue // Story: Flash Fog // by Kwakerjak //------------------------------// September 17 – 4:35 PM The previous two weeks had felt like a blur to Pencil Pusher. In the aftermath of the fog, so many things happened at the Department of Weather that he hadn’t really had the time to make a return visit to Ponyville. It wasn’t until things began settling down a bit that somepony realized that Fluttershy still had to make her final report to the Department; granted, by this point many of the details were public knowledge thanks to interviews she’d granted to the press, but she still needed to deliver an “official” version for their records. Even though his schedule was busier than ever, Pencil Pusher had jumped at the chance to volunteer for this assignment. He had explained that, as he’d been working with Fluttershy since the beginning of the incident, he ought to be the pony to help her bring it to a close. Thus, he once again found himself sitting in the tastefully decorated living room of the animal caretaker/fog specialist/Element of Kindness/former supermodel, only this time Fluttershy wasn’t distracted by worries of an imminent raid from the Equestrian Revenue Service. “Well,” she said as she considered her answer to his request, “as far as the details that haven’t been covered by the press go, I think the department will be able to get quite a bit of information out of the article Twilight and I are publishing in The Journal of Magical Theory. Just yesterday, she stopped by to let me know that it had passed the peer-review process; apparently, Celestia and Luna pulled some strings to speed things up a bit. Though, to be honest, I’m still not sure why Twilight insists on sharing the credit. I only came up with the original idea; she’s the one who analyzed all of the data and actually wrote the article.” Pencil Pusher nodded. “I’ll make sure the Department orders a few copies for our archives. Still, an official statement from you will certainly make things go over smoothly. Don’t worry, you can just copy statements from previous reports verbatim. As long as you let us know all the important details not covered by your agreement with Caligo, it won’t be a problem.” “Oh, okay. Um, do you need it right away?” “Not really. If you take a few days to write it up and mail it in, there shouldn’t be a problem.” Fluttershy simply smiled in response, which gave Pencil a warm, gushy feeling from somewhere in his stomach. Her pet rabbit was still giving him the stinkeye, though. “Er, speaking of Department business, how has that nonprofit group been doing? You know, the one that was all worried about humans?” he asked her, hoping that her answer would distract him from the bunny’s baleful glare. “Oh, right. Well, I attended one of their meetings, like I promised on the first day of the fog. It was, um... interesting. I mean, apparently these creatures are mentioned in some old folktales, so I suppose that explains where they got the idea from, but still, if creatures like them really existed, I'm pretty sure at least one of my animal friends would have heard of them.” “Um, okay. So, I take it that they were disappointed that there weren’t any humans in the fog?” “Well, Lyra was disappointed. She’s the one that really likes this human idea. Bon-Bon seemed relieved more than anything.” “But at least they admit that the fog wasn’t caused by humans, right?” “Oh, no. They’re still convinced that humans were behind it. Basically, both of them think that the humans mistook the swiftlets’ echolocation calls for some sort of defense system and were frightened away.” Pencil Pusher’s reaction was more than a little incredulous. “‘Frightened away’? Where would these things retreat to?” “Um, Pinkie Pie had a theory that they may exist in an alternate dimension...” “I thought she didn’t believe in humans.” “I’m pretty sure that she doesn’t, but she also says that if they do exist, they won’t stop existing just because she doesn’t believe in them.” “Uh-huh... and what do you think of this alternate dimension idea?” “Well, to be honest, it seems a bit farfetched to me, especially the part about human versions of ponies.” Pencil Pusher nodded uncertainly and decided to change the subject. “Right.... by the way, whatever happened to those fillies who left Pinkie’s party? I mean, I heard they were safe, but I had to head back to Cloudsdale before I could learn anything else.” “Oh, well, the Crusaders were in quite a bit of trouble. As I understand it, their families consider their experience in the fog to be ample punishment in itself for their escape from the party, but the fact that they attempted to misuse medications to make their escape is another matter entirely. All three of them were grounded for a month, and it probably would have been much longer if Derpy hadn’t decided to intervene on their behalf.” Pencil Pusher found this to be rather surprising. “Really? They gave her an overdose of ipecac and she thought their punishment was too harsh?” “I know what you mean,” Fluttershy said before taking a sip of tea from her cup. “What’s even more surprising is that the Crusaders hadn’t asked her to help them. I suppose Derpy’s just a very forgiving pony.” Pencil Pusher chuckled. “Well, we could probably use a few forgiving ponies in the DOW these days.” “Hmm? Oh, right, that scandal. Hard Hitter asked me about that when he interviewed me. He seemed unusually happy when I told him that I didn’t really learn anything from the course Five-C sent me. I’m not sure why, though. I would think that most ponies would rather learn about fog from a course instead of having to teach themselves everything about it.” Pencil Pusher wasn’t particularly eager to speculate on the inner workings of a reporter’s head, either, so he forged ahead with the aspects of the scandal that had directly affected him. “Well, it’s caused a bit of a shake-up back in Cloudsdale. Basically, the head of Personnel ended up taking most of the blame—not because she’s personally corrupt, but because everything happened on her watch. She was getting close to retirement anyway, so the higher-ups convinced her to resign with a full pension so the heat would die down.” “But aren’t they going to fix the problem?” “Well, that’s why they’ve put somepony else in her place. Namely, my boss—or rather, my former boss.” Pencil Pusher couldn’t resist a smile as he once again contemplated the fact that he was no longer dealing with Greg on a daily basis. Sure, there were some ponies in Requisitions who were quietly expressing shock and resentment over the fact that their idiot boss had somehow managed to cajole his way into a bigger office with a higher paycheck and more prestige, but Pencil Pusher knew better. Convinced as he was that he was the primary reason for his department’s success, Greg hadn’t requested that any of his subordinates be transferred with him. However, he had since learned to his dismay that it wasn’t the regular practice of division heads to push all of their duties off on others, and he hadn’t been in his position long enough to figure out who could be bullied into taking on the tasks that Synergy had willingly completed on her own. Faced with the horrifying prospect of actually having to do his job, Greg had made a desperate attempt to have “Pizza Party” transferred to Personnel... but by that point, it was too late. “Oh?” Fluttershy said, raising her eyebrows in interest. “So, you have a new boss, then.” “In a manner of speaking,” Pencil Pusher replied. “Thanks to my performance during the fog response, I’m the new head of the Requisitions Division, so my new boss is my old boss’ boss.” The bureaucrat tried to say this as humbly as possible, having been informed by Rarity and Rainbow Dash that Fluttershy was not interested in braggarts, but he couldn’t quite conceal all of his pride. “Apparently, volunteering to be your liaison was the best career move I’ve ever made.” “Well,” Fluttershy said as she set down her now-empty teacup, “I really enjoyed working with you. I wouldn’t mind keeping in touch.” This was it. He’d spent a lot of time mentally preparing for this moment, but the time had come for Pencil Pusher to make his offer. “Well, how about we meet for something a bit more informal? Maybe dinner this weekend?” Crap! I botched it. That was the worst possible way to ask anypony out on a date. I had all the possible approaches in the world, and I went with the boring cliché. Fluttershy, however, didn’t seem to find the ordinariness to be all that off-putting, though she did look noticeably flustered. “Um... are... are you asking me out?” “Well, yeah, I guess so. I mean, if you’re interested.” Fluttershy, however, looked rather uncertain about the situation. “But... isn’t a three-hour flight a long distance for a date?” “Not really,” Pencil Pusher said. “I mean, after all the flying I did as your liaison, I’m sort of used to the commute. It’s really not that bad when you aren’t in a hurry.” “Oh,” Fluttershy said, breaking off eye contact as she stared nervously at the corners of the room. “But... are you really sure I’m the pony you should be asking?” “What do you mean?” “I mean, when you think about what you want in a special somepony, wouldn’t you rather have a confident, successful mare? You know, the kind who obviously knows what she wants and is willing to do what’s necessary to get it?” Pencil Pusher wasn’t expecting a question like this, but something in the back of his mind told him that this wasn’t just a polite rejection. There was a bit too much self-effacement in Fluttershy’s tone for a typical “let’s just be friends” response. After taking a second or two to decide on a reply, he answered her with a touch more confidence in his voice than he actually felt. “Well, yeah. That’s why I’m asking you.” Fluttershy’s eyes widened when he said this, which Pencil took as a cue to restate his offer. “So, are you interested in dinner sometime this weekend?” At first, Fluttershy was silent, staring at her hooves and allowing the ticking of the clock on her wall to fill her living room as Pencil Pusher did his best to avoid looking nervous. Then, after interminable seconds that felt like hours, she looked him in the eye, smiled sweetly, and with a slight blush in her cheeks, she replied, “Sure.”