//------------------------------// // Chapter 2: First Contact // Story: Anarchy in Equestria // by TheHumanoidTyphoon //------------------------------// "Well duh." It replied. Gaige just stood there dumbfounded at the light-grey pegasus. Her arms fell limply to her sides, her weapon on the ground by her side. The pegasus eyed her confusedly wondering why she was staring like that. After Gaige picked her jaw up she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, letting it go after a few seconds. She spoke up. "What I'm about to do is not me, it does not fit my personality, and I do not wish to do it. My feminine side is acting up far beyond I would ever let it and I can't hold back much longer. Can I please release it for a few seconds before I internally explode?" The pegasus nervously spoke. "Um o-okay." Gaige began. "You. Are. So. God. Damned. CUTE!" With the last word she opened her eyes, a huge goofy grin on her face. She began to squeal and bounce. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-GRK!" Her squeal cut short by a metal fist driving into her throat. Coughing, sputtering, and gasping for air, Gaige fell on her hands and knees. "What the hay was that?" The pegasus asked, shocked at the sudden behaviour. "I was acting *gasp* too girly *wheeze* I had to shut myself up." Gaige replied rubbing her throat. "So you hit yourself in the throat?" "Yup, nearly crushed my windpipe. Totally worth it though." "What's wrong with being a girl." "Its not being a girl, its being girly. Its weak and stupid, next I'll be polishing my nails and reading celebrity gossip if I don't stop." "Well I suppose its a matter of preference. So whats your name? And what are you? If you don't mind me asking." The pegasus asked. Gaige thought for a second. I suppose I'll be fine. Even if she attacks me I could easily put a bullet between her eyes. "My names Gaige and I'm a human." She said whilst picking up her gun, holstering it, and standing up. "Well my name is Derpy Hooves and you already know what I am." Derpy said. At that Gaige began to snicker. "Whats so funny?" Derpy asked. "We may have different means for the word 'derpy'. Where I come from it normally means something is askew or awkward." Gaige answered trying her hardest not to burst out laughing. "Well its not nice to laugh." Derpy said looking down, her ears drooping. Gaige finally able to suppress the snickering spoke up. "I'm honestly sorry but in my defense, where I come from, being nice gets you killed." Derpy was taken aback by that last statement. Somewhere where nice people die? It's unheard of. Derpy spoke. "W-where did you come from?" She asked nervously. "Well I was born on Eden-5 but before I came here I was on Pandora." Gaige answered. "I've never heard of those nations before." "That's because they're not nations, they're planets." "So you're an alien?" "In a sense." "How did you get here?" "Long story." "Well I just got off work, I have time." Gaige paused at that last statement. "You have a job?" She asked. "Yeah, I'm a mail mare." Derpy answered. "Hm, wasn't expecting that. But I suppose it makes sense considering you have wings. It's funny now that I think about it, pegasuses are mythology to my race." Gaige "You must be taking this pretty well then, and its pegasi." "I've seen weirder." "Name one thing weirder than a mythological creature." Derpy said in disbelief. "Tiny Tina." Gaige replied. "Do you know anybody that seems to be a little bipolar at times and may have ADHD?" Derpy thought for a moment. "Yeah, Pinkie Pie." She responded. "Picture her except 13 and with access to weapons-grade explosives and you have Tiny Tina. She's actually pretty cool though if you don't get on her bad side" Derpy shuddered at the thought. "Fair enough." She said not wanting to delve further into the topic. "Where am I anyways?" Gaige asked. "Equestria, Sweet Apple Acres to be exact. Derpy answered. "Okay that's one question answered." Gaige said. "So, about how you got here?" Derpy asked. "Lead me to the nearest town and I'll tell you, but I'll warn you now, its pretty graphic." Gaige said. "Deal. Ponyville is this way" Derpy said. Gaige dismissing the weird name. On their way to town Gaige gave Derpy a recap of how she found herself in the forest. "So, you killed all those people!" Derpy exclaimed taking a step away. "Only because they wanted to steal from me, kill me, and eat me." Gaige replied nonchalantly. "But why!" "They've lost their sanity a long time ago. Mostly because of all the carnivorous and not to mention feral creatures there that threaten their lives daily. But some, like Krieg, were experimented on." "Who's Krieg?" Derpy asked still a little afraid of the innocent looking human before her. "One of the many psychos out there. He's in our little group of vault hunters because he still has a little sanity in him that threatens to take over and kill them both if he harms anyone innocent." Answered Gaige. "So there's still hope for them?" Derpy asked hopefully. "Krieg yes, but he's a rare case. He had a strong will before he lost his sanity and even that got reduced to a tiny voice in his head." "How do you know all this?" "We've heard the arguments between him and his remaining sanity before, although we obviously can only hear one side of it." "Oh." Derpy said disheartened. She set her focus from Gaige to ahead of her. "We're almost there." "Great, I was getting a little tired from walking. She said. Then she saw something in the sky. A blue blur with a rainbow coloured trail was zipping through the sky at amazing speeds. "Whats that?" She asked. But before derpy could answer the blur quickly changed direction and barreled straight towards Gaige's chest. "OH SHI-OOF." The blur hammered into her chest knocking her several meters away. Gaige quickly tucked into a backwards shoulder roll and rolling onto her feet, checked her HUD, she saw whatever it was had almost completely gone through her shields. She brought her right hand to her waist where her Ornery Revolver digistructed in her hand, and brought it up to the assailant. A cyan pegasus stood in front of her, its mane and tail were all the colours of the rainbow and her violet eyes were locked in a spiteful glare at the vault hunter. "Who the hell invited the living pride parade!" Gaige yelled. They both stood at the ready, waiting for the other to make a move, but before they could do anything Derpy stepped between them and yelled. "STOP!" "What do you mean stop! this thing kidnapped you!" The Cyan pegasus yelled, not averting it's gaze from the human before her. "SHE didn't kidnap me, I found her lost in Sweet Apple Acres." Derpy argued. "How do you know its not dangerous!" The pegasus retorted. "I"m still here aren't I? And yes she's dangerous but only to things that attack her!" The pegasus seemed to calm down after that. "Sorry about that Gaige, Rainbow dash can be a little quick to come to conclusions." "Its alright." Gaige replied, putting her gun away. "If she's a friend of yours then she's good." Gaige walked over to the pegasus known as Rainbow dash and extended her left arm. "I'm Gaige." "Rainbow Dash" She responded. putting her hoof in Gaige's hand. "Fastest pony in Equestria." She said puffing out her chest. She looked at Gaige for a minute. "Uh... What exactly are you?" She asked. "I'm a human." Gaige replied matter-of-factly. "What are you doing here?" "It's a long story, Derpy was taking me to er-Ponyville was it? You can come with and we'll tell you." "Sure, I got nothing better to do." Rainbow said. "Oh, and whats a 'pride parade'. As the trio walked towards the town Gaige and Derpy filled Rainbow Dash in of how she arrived (along with Gaige explaining to Rainbow Dash what a "pride parade" was) and received a similar reaction to Derpy's, followed by a similar post-story conversation. Eventually they arrived at the edge of Ponyville. Rainbow Dash spoke. "Here we are." The town itself was reminiscent to that of a 19th century village and had straw roofs and stone or wooden walls. "Come with me, I'll take you to Twilight's place. If anypony can find a way to get you home, it'll be her. You coming Derpy?". "Sorry but I gotta go take care of Ditzy." Derpy replied. "Kay, see ya." Rainbow Dash said. "Later Derpy." Said Gaige. After Derpy left, Rainbow Dash left into town with Gaige in tow. Feeling it would be best that she wasn't noticed, Gaige sneaked through town by hiding in alleys and moving across streets when Rainbow Dash distracted the other ponies. After a few minutes they arrived at a giant tree with a door, a few windows, and a balcony with a telescope on it. A sign hanging near the front read "Ponyville Library". Rainbow Dash knocked on the door and a female voice came from the other side. "Spike, can you get that?" A younger male voice rang out. "On it." The light pattering of footsteps could be heard outside the door and after a few moments the door opened to reveal a three foot tall lizard on the other side. It had purple scales with a green stomach and similar coloured spines coming up from it's tail to the top of it's head. It looked at Rainbow Dash and spoke. "Oh hi Rainbow Dash, are you here for the next issue of Daring D-." His words caught in his throat when he saw the tall, bipedal, creature behind her. After a few moments the lizard found his voice. "Uh, Twilight?" He called out behind him. A slightly agitated voice replied from in the house. "What is it Spike?" "You might want to see this." The lizard known as Spike called out. Footsteps (or rather hoofsteps) could be heard coming from the stairs that Gaige could see through the doorway. A few seconds later a lavender pony stepped into the room. It had a dark-violet mane and tail with a pink stripe running through the middle. Its most prominent feature was the horn growing through the center of its forehead. Gaige quickly came to terms with it and moved on. It came to the doorway and froze when she saw Gaige. "Um... Rainbow Dash. Who is this?" Twilight said eying her curiously. "Oh right." Rainbow Dash said. "Twilight, meet Gaige." "Sup." Gaige said. Heh, I always wanted to say that, glad Lilith isn't around. She thought. A look of wonder dawned upon Twilight's face. "Hi my name is Twilight Sparkle, I'm really glad to meet you. Please come in." She said, barely keeping her excitement from bursting out. After entering the room Twilight levitated some chairs into the room and sat in one. Twilight noticed the surprised look on Gaige's face when she looked at her. "What? Do they not have magic where you're from?" She asked. "Well people claim to but its normally just parlor tricks and illusions." Gaige replied eying the chair curiously. "Hm, well I can tell you all about it later." Twilight said. "But first, I would like you to answer some questions if you have the time. Please, take a seat. Deciding she had nothing better to do, Gaige took a seat in the closest chair while Rainbow Dash and Twilight sat in the other two, making a triangle. Spike had run off somewhere most likely out of fear but it was reasonable considering the situation. Twilight levitated a long piece of parchment and a quill in front of her. "Great." She said. "First off, where did you come from." "Pandora, but I was born on Eden-5." They went through question after question, Twilight writing down every answer, and having the anticipated reaction about her "occupation", which was explained, and how she got here. "I still don't think its right." Twilight muttered. "I never said it was right, I said it was necessary." Gaige replied. "Besides, if you're worried I'm going to go on a mass-murdering rampage then you can rest easy, I have no reason to." "Fair enough, last questions." Twilight said. "Is that a robotic forelimb?" "Yeah I've been wanting to know what that's about too." Rainbow Dash said "Yes it's a robotic arm, and honestly, I didn't expect a high enough level of technology here for you to recognize it. No offense." Gaige said. "None taken." Twilight replied. "Mechanics like that aren't exactly a commonly used thing. Next, do all humans have robotic limbs? If not, what happened to your arm?" "No, not all of them do, and I cut mine off for a school science fair project." There was a long period of silence that seemed to go on for minutes on end. The silence was broken when Twilight took a deep breath. "YOU CUT YOUR OWN ARM OFF? ARE YOU CRAZY!" Twilight shouted loud enough to rattle the windows. After Rainbow Dash and Gaige uncovered their ears the latter spoke up. "God damn you're loud." Gaige moaned, trying to suppress the ringing in her ears. Twilight realized the effect of her outburst and blushed from embarrassment, hiding her face in her mane. "Sorry." She muttered. "But what good reason do you have for cutting your own arm off." "Like I said, for a science project... And my greatest creation." Gaige responded, still trying to stop the ringing in her ears. "What is it?" Twilight asked curiously. "Yeah this is starting to sound cool." Rainbow Dash added. "I'll tell you, but only because you don't look like the kind of people that want to kill me when my back is turned." Gaige said. "It's called project DT, later named Deathtrap. It was a design for an anti-bullying bot made to be deployed in a school environment. It would locate any rude, offensive, or downright hostile actions towards another and deliver 'punishment' accordingly. I got the idea after finally being fed up with Marcie Holloway for the umpteenth time." Gaige spit the name out like venom. "Who's Marcie Holloway?" Twilight asked. She immediately knew she would regret asking when she saw the look on Gaige's face. "She's a little brat who thinks she's better than everyone else just because her dad is rich! She goes out of her way to upset people and even ripped off my DT project! Not to mention her dad bought off the judges panel and she got first with her defective ass copy while I got third! THIRD!" Gaige's voice raising little by little. "She hasn't worked a day in her damn life and even rubs in everyone's face the fact that it's better! The stuck up BITCH!" Gaige screamed, standing and kicking the chair she was sitting in into a wall. "Crime-Buster bot! Are you serious!" After blowing off the pent-up rage Gaige turned towards Twilight and Rainbow dash. The two just sat there with wide-eyed stares at Gaige. "Oo-kay then, bad topic." Twilight said after recovering from the shock. "Do you... Need a minute?" She asked warily. "Nah, I'm good." Gaige responded releasing her breath. She walked over and picked up the chair, bringing it back to the middle of the room. "Sorry about that. I'll move on with the story." She said sitting down. "So I couldn't find a way to efficiently digistruct it into existence until I got an idea when I cut my arm on some sheet metal." "Digistruct?" Twilight asked curiously. "The assembly of something on a near-molecular level." Gaige replied, pulling an SMG magazine from her backpack unit to show as an example. Twilight watched in awe as a small box formed from the blue particles coming out of a machine on her waist. "That's pretty cool." Rainbow Dash said. "Before we elaborate lets just get this story over with." "Yes, go on." Twilight said after snapping out of her daze. "So I got the idea that I could build a robotic arm with Deathtrap's digistructing data programmed in it. So I cut off the rest of my arm with a particle saw and voilà. I made myself a robotic arm. You should have seen the look on my dad's face when he saw me with only one arm." Gaige chuckled at the last part. "You think it's funny?" Twilight asked, a hint of concern in her voice. "Well yeah, why wouldn't I?" Gaige answered. "He was genuinely concerned for your health. How can you laugh at that?" "Well it sounds horrible when you put it that way. Listen, he knows I'm smart enough to have a good reason to do it." A somber look came over her face. "I still miss him and mom at times." "Don't get sappy." Rainbow Dash said playfully. Gaige and Twilight shot her a glare. "What happened?" Twilight asked sympathetically, turning away from Rainbow Dash. "I'm kind of a criminal on Eden-5." Gaige said sheepishly scratching the back of her neck. "What! Why?" "I may or may not have accidentally... blown up Marcie Holloway. Gaige murmured. "What? I couldn't hear you." Gaige looked at the two for a second, she took a deep breath. "I blew up Marcie Holloway." Gaige said shamefully. "YOU WHAT!" Twilight and Rainbow dash yelled. "How can you accidentally blow somepony up!" Rainbow Dash followed up. "Well after she won the science fair she started gloating and laughing at me, then she shoved me. Deathtrap recognized her as a threat and did his job. I must have screwed up something when programming deathtrap's digistruct claws because when he swiped her, instead of scratching her, she... yeah. Like, I hated her and all but even she didn't deserve that. So my dad made a distraction and I broke out and fled to Pandora where my talents would come in use." "Oh." Twilight replied. "What are your talents?" She said trying to change the subject. "Engineering, metalworking, the sort." Gaige replied catching on what she was trying to do. "You're good with technology?" She asked. "Well duh, who do you think built my arm?" Gaige answered sarcastically. "It's kind of obvious Twilight." Rainbow Dash added. "Just clarifying, do you think you could help me with something?" Twilight asked. "Depends on what it is." Gaige replied. "I found some strange object on my way back home and I think it's some form of technology. I've been studying it for the past hour now." "Alright, I'll bite. Who knows? It could be some of the gear I lost." "Ugh, egghead stuff? No thanks." Rainbow Dash said, getting up to leave. "Hold on a minute there Dash. If it is mine, I can promise it will be awesome. And I'm an egghead too and I'm still a badass." Gaige called out. Rainbow Dash paused for a second. "Well I can't say no to seeing something awesome. But I doubt it will be as awesome as me." Rainbow Dash said turning back around. "Perfect." Twilight said enthusiastically. "I'll go get it." She said, heading upstairs. There was the sound of a few things shuffling around before she came back down with something in her magical grasp. "Here it is." Twilight said handing it to Gaige. She looked at the blue, white, and orange piece of metal in her hands. A smile crept upon her face. "I know what it is." She said. "You do?" Twilight gasped. "Yup, It's a Maliwan brand fire SMG, this specific one is called the Fervid Gospel. But seeing as you don't have guns here I'll have to explain it to you. Guns are projectile weapons and SMG stands for sub machine gun, it is fully automatic and shoots until you stop pulling the trigger or it runs out of bullets. This one is made by the company Maliwan which specializes in elemental weaponry. There are other companies like Torgue which specializes in explosive weaponry or Jakobs who's guns can, and I quote, fire as fast as you can pull the trigger." "It's a weapon?" Twilight questioned. "I find that hard to believe. I've been experimenting with it for hours and it never did anything. But that may be since it seems to be broken or missing a piece." She said pointing to a rectangular hole in the side of the gun. "It just doesn't have any ammo." Gaige said. She pulled a magazine from her inventory unit and popped it into the slot in the gun. A few lights on the gun flicked on. "I don't see anything awesome about it." Rainbow Dash cut in, unimpressed. "You haven't seen it in action yet." Gaige replied. "Let's go outside and I'll show you what it can do." With that the trio left the building and to a nearby clearing. "This should do." Gaige said. "Got anything I can use for targets?" She asked. "A log or a bottle should do." Twilight levitated a nearby log over to their position and stood it up. Gaige took aim at the log, firmly placing the butt of her gun into her right shoulder and assuming a firm stance. She squeezed the trigger and chattering filled the air. After she stopped firing she brought her gun down to look at her work. The log in front of her was now a splintered stump and had flames eating away at it, pieces of wood scattered everywhere. "So? What do you think?" Gaige asked. When she turned around she saw the two sitting there, slack jawed and wide eyed, staring at what was left of the log. "Uh... Hello?" Gaige said. When she received no answer she walked up to the two. She waved her hand in front of Twilight's eyes but it didn't work. She tried snapping in Rainbow Dash's ear and received a similar result. "Badass to ponies, can you read me? Argh." Gaige pulled out her Ornery Revolver and unloaded it into the air. The loud bangs that it emitted managed to snap the two out of their daze. "You okay? You two looked like you saw the meaning of life." "That was... Horrible and amazing at the same time! The level of technology is centuries ahead of our time! But it's so destructive." Twilight said with a mix of fear and awe. "That was totally awesome! You tore that wood to shreds!" Rainbow Dash yelled in excitement. "It's what I do." Gaige replied with a smirk. "Besides this isn't even my best gun." She turned to Twilight. "Hold these." She said throwing her revolver and her SMG down in front of Twilight. "I emptied the clips when I fired them so they're safe. And I don't think you'd be comfortable with these in my possession." Twilight carefully picked them up with her magic and floated them over into her bag. "You're just giving them to me?" Twilight asked in disbelief. "Why." "I don't need them, besides, if someone or something attacks me I can handle myself, and in a pinch I can bring out deathtrap." Gaige said as she walked over to the wood, picking it up with her robotic arm. "Now check this out." She threw it high in the air, a second later blue particles began to form and create sharp blue claws at the tips of her fingers on her left robotic arm. When the wood came down Gaige slashed it twice, slicing it into splinters. The claws broke back down into blue particles and receded. "I gained some anarchy stacks when i emptied the clips, I can use them to do that." "Anarchy stacks? But that's not a thing, you can't stack it." Twilight stated. "It's just named anarchy because of its effects. It increases the damage done by the bullets i shoot but the mental effects mess with my aim. It's a very complicated process and I'm not going to go into the explanation." "Mental effects?" "Yeah, a minor setback. It can change my mood a bit." "Like?" "After a few dozen or so stacks I get a little over excited, if I gain say one hundred and fifty I tend to develop a little bit of a full-blown god complex." "That doesn't sound pleasant." Twilight said. "Actually it isn't too bad. Besides, the stacks fully deplete when I prematurely reload my ammo." Gaige responded. "Well it's good to know you got a fail safe." "Wait, a god complex? Seriously?" Rainbow Dash chimed in. "It's complicated." Gaige replied. "We should head inside, I need to send a letter to Princess Celestia, and I don't think that it would be a good idea to tell everypony you're here yet." Gaige shrugged and followed Twilight. "I gotta go and check up on Tank, see you later eggheads." Rainbow Dash called out before flying away. "Later Dash." Gaige replied. And with that, the two left for the library.