//------------------------------// // Chapter 4: Popping the Question (Two or Three Times) // Story: The Totally Tubular and Tremendously Tenacious and Turbulent Transplanted Teen // by Sparkle Fire //------------------------------// A week before Fall Formal; September 23, 1988 As Ryder woke up on a Friday morning in late September and made his morning tea, aware that he may be recognized as a potential partner for the upcoming Fall Formal... he wondered about those who would ask him; there could be as many as a few to potentially the whole school begging for him. He could tear down a major taboo in the next fortnight... Realizing this fact, he grabbed his journal first thing and wrote as soon as he laid the newspapers on the table in front of him and tuned his radio. ............ Ryder's Journal September 23, 1988 Morning The fall formal is coming up. September 30, to be exact. Exactly one week away. One week to finally be seen for who I am. One week until I reach the Next Level (relationship-wise, of course). One week until barriers are broken, walls are torn down, and standards are tossed out the window in the name of love. One week to make that happen. Matchmaker, matchmaker, give me a match! ............ As per usual, he grabbed his stuff, hustled down seventeen flights of stairs, and caught his cab. Needless to say, the rest of the morning went by without a hitch. Once he reached the school, he didn't have to wait long for his potential suitors to come running, as he was soon to learn. Three mares spotted him in the courtyard and followed him inside, mouths open and drooling, ending their pursuit once he reached Homeroom, at which point Ryder hurriedly closed the door. "So you're available, I see," Mrs. Violet commented. "I've been considered 'on the market' for the past four weeks, almost a month now," he replied. "A few of them have even followed me home or hidden in the back corner of the coffeeshop, waiting for me to show up!" "You're kidding me." "I kid you not," he shot back, and he took his seat. "It's getting way out of fucking hand, I'm telling you now." “It’s not out of hand, the way I see it,” Violet said. “...they really seem to like you.” “Tell me about it.” In the midst of his brief rant, Lemony Gems trotted past him while on a run to the restroom. She caught sight of Ryder and stopped in her tracks. She walked back towards him and flashed him a sincere smile. “You’re available, yes?” Lemony Gems asked. “I guess,” Ryder shrugged. “...everyone in Canterlot’s been following me around like I’m Michael Jackson or Madonna or something like that... Whaddaya want?” "Do you wanna go to Fall Formal with me?" Ryder reached out and twirled his finger through her mane, twisting the two colors together. "I'm not sure right now... I mean, can you wait a while and let me think about it?" "Okay, I understand." Lemony Gems launched into a squealing fit on her way out. Women... can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em... Ryder thought as he scribbled her name on a sticky note, remembering to give her a call later. ... During lunch hour, Ryder, with sack in hand, was followed yet again by two more mares, and this time, some frisky colt decided to show up. He promptly shooed them off and proceeded to find his regular table, at which point Diamond Rose accidentally ran into him. A bit of her lunch ended up on the floor. "Would you like me to get that?" Ryder asked, politely. "No thanks," she replied. "No, I insist," he continued. "It's part of your lunch." "I said no thanks... and besides, there's prob'ly germs on it already anyways." And they continued. "How was your morning?" Diamond asked. "Sniffed on and rubbed against too many times to count..." "They must really like you." Ya think? Ryder thought, annoyed. "All morning, I've been the object of many dripping wet delusions..." "Don't go any further," Diamond stopped him. "I'm trying to make my point." She stood there in a pensive sort of stance as she contemplated what to say next. "I don't know how to tell you this..." "Just say it, Rosie. Whatever it is you have to say, just say it." The mare put her muzzle to Ryder's ear and whispered in a sweet and soft tone of voice, "Would you go to the Fall Formal with me?" He reached out to scratch her behind the ear. "Let me think about it today..." Before he knew it, he saw another random mare start to lock her sights on him and bolted straight to the table, diving and cowering underneath it in the hopes that these strange folks would leave him the hell alone. "What the fuck, dude? What's up with you?!" Caramel demanded to know. "These crazy mares... won't stop... bloody following me around..." Ryder managed to squeak out. "You're fair game to 'em, mate, so get used to it," Gaffer said, not knowing what else to say to him in his highly irritated state of mind. "Gee, that's good to know!" Captain Fucking Obvious... Ryder threw his arms up into the air. Exasperation setting in, he wolfed down his lunch. ... "After your apple tart's out of the oven and ready to present, remember to tidy up your workstations and put everything where it belongs," Mrs. Ambrosia called out. Ryder and the rest of his Home Ec group were waiting for the timer to trip so they could take their apple tart out of the oven to be judged and graded. To pass the time, the four decided to toss around some gossip. On the subject of Fall Formal, the tension racked up. "So Ryder, who're to taking to fall formal?" Moondancer asked. "I don't know yet." "Have you asked anypony?" Sweetcream Scoops asked. "I've been asked twice." All three now crowded around him, astounded. "Who asked you!?" they jubilantly asked. "Lemony Gems asked me in homeroom, and Rose asked me during lunch. That makes two." Cheerilee gasped a bit. "I wouldn't 'ave guessed... so who's the lucky one?" "Once again, I haven't decided yet!" Ryder huffed. As soon as that happened, the timer went off with a loud, mechanical Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrinnnnnnggggggg!!! "She's done!" Ryder hurriedly grabbed an oven mitt as Moondancer grabbed a bowl and some confectioners' sugar, Cheerilee tossed him a sieve, and Sweetcream went for some whipped cream in a can. Cheerilee opened the over door, and Ryder immediately reached inside and grabbed the ends of the dish. He set it down on the island. After that, he spooned up some confectioners' sugar and patted it through the sieve, adding a soft powdery sheen to the tart itself. There were two more groups putting the finishing touches on their tarts at this point, so Berry Punch decided to drop in on him. Ryder noticed. "What're you doing here, toots?" "I just want to see the tart that you made," Berry explained in simple terms. "You like it, huh?" "Well, in case you haven't already seen it, the two other colts that I was stuck with decided that they wanted to dump a whole thing of applesauce into the top of it, so that's why looks a bit sloppy." "So that nice yellow one, she isn't here?" he inquired, referring to Lemon Hearts, her other group member, who was out sick. "Unfortunately..." she lamented. "She knows how to keep the other two in line and get shit done." "I can see that." The conversation paused. "Aside from that, I'd also like to ask you something..." "Yes?" "Would you like to go to Fall Formal with me?" Ryder's heart skipped a beat; everypony in the immediate vicinity began shuffling their hooves and 'oohing', anticipating a response. He clammed up. "I'll think about it," he responded, shooing her off to the dismay of his classmates. “‘I’ll think about it’ this, ‘I’ll think about it’ that,” Sweetcream went on. “When will you make up your mind?” She was visibly annoyed. “Well, I’m soooorrrry,” he said, “But when the entire fucking city’s breathing down your neck, constantly wanting to know who you’re dragging to Fall Formal, it really gets to you…” Ryder was very cross. … In the break room that afternoon, nursing his tea, he sat in one of the recliners and tried to forget the incident in Home Ec. Lemony Gems asked him first thing, and exploded in a hyperactive giddy fit. Diamond Rose asked him, and another mare made him bolt. Now Berry Punch, another good friend of his, popped the same question, and it only made his Home Ec partners moan rather loudly. It made him want to throw his hands in the air in defeat. The thought of it constantly racked his brain and muddled his thoughts. It was driving him nearly to drink. He finished his tea and thought of Lemony Gems, since she was the first to ask. Gems seems like a sweetie, he began, but after I said ‘maybe’ this morning, she hopped up and down like she’d met George Michael or Johnny Depp something, as if he’d autographed her a picture. However, I’m getting the feeling that she’ll be quite possessive, she looks like she’s obsessed with me, he added. If I choose her, remember the old mountain saying: ‘it takes a strong man to handle a broken woman’. She might be coming down from an emotional high tide or something unfortunate in her life. That, and she has a nice physique. On to Diamond Rose now… Oh yes, what to say about the fair Diamond Rose? Very beautiful hair, soft fur, dreamy eyes. She could practically melt in my arms. If I choose her, Ryder continued, she'll be absolutely excited and kissing me like crazy. She seems content with life, and with no emotional baggage, I'll fit right in. But yeah, still not diving right in. And last but not least, Berry Punch. Berry Punch, the sophisticated one - very sophisticated for an Earth pony from Ponyville or the mining towns, I'm surprised to say. My only issue is - and this is a big one - distance. She lives in Ponyville and takes a train every morning to go to school here. Wouldn't want to have that in a relationship, though - train fares add up very quickly. This would be quite the tough decision to make. Unfortunately, the dismissal bell rang, derailing his train of thought. He went straight home. He ran upstairs, grabbed a pencil, and wrote in his journal. ... Ryder's Journal September 23, 1988 Evening, After school Lemony Gems Diamond Rose Berry Punch For the first time in history, (for one of these lucky ladies - names up there) it's gonna start Raining Ryder!!! Off to work now. ... As he shut the cover on his journal, he suddenly remembered the note he scribbled down that morning; he dug it out of his pocket and laid on top of his dresser for safe-keeping.