//------------------------------// // A new deal // Story: Through the roof // by The Psychopath //------------------------------// We had finally arrived in the dressing room. It was actually pretty small compared to the other rooms in this castle that smelled of compensation in some department or other. However, it was very well organized, what with the rollls of fabric placed in order by color and size within tall shelves. The sowing tools were already taken by this white pony, except of course, for the sowing machine itself, which lay dormant in a corner. I was standing on a stool, without my shirt, but with my pants on. Despite this pony's insistance that I take off all my clothes so that she could measure me properly, a loud "NO" was enough to hold her off. They seemed rather surprised that I actually had muscles when, with my shirt on, I looked rather fat. Twilight's interest in my species is mostly annoying at best. She even had to ask about our reproductive abilities and how they worked, to which me and Rarity choked on our spit, and Pinkie Pie told the lavender pony that that isn't the best of questions to ask. Either way, she wanted me to tell her about the more "social" aspects of our culture...she was more shocked and appalled then pleased. "Well, you can either take it or leave it. In my world, power is envied by nearly everyone of a high status. Once they have everything, they still want more. It's sad really." "But, there is no central leadership? No princess?" "Nope. In fact, I believe there are about one hundred and ninety-six countries in the world." "That is quite alot." said Rarity while still measuring my waist." "Oh yes. I'm sure you would love to see everything some cultures make, such as the Chinese. They have a great culture all the same, and they make magnificent clothing." "Oooo! That sounds exotic." "Actually, Twilight, the majority of problems in every country comes from the stupidity of humans. It's like 'Oh my god! Like, his skin is SOOO totally not white-vanilla. We should, like, totally diss on him for, like, having 'colored' skin even though white is still a color.' and many other things that I would prefer not to talk about." "What? You hate on eachother just because you have different colored skin?" asked Pinkie Pie. "Yup. I don't hate humanity though. I prefer to see the brighter side of it by admiring the art we have created over the years, whether it's painted, sculpted, or built." "So you DO have a great taste of fashion!" "I already told you that I have NO sense of fashion. Besides, I would be glad if you just gave me plain shirts, pants, and undergarments. I don't need any extravaganza." I said as Rarity pouted. "Fine, but don't come back to me if you want something special." "I won't." "They always say that. Oh, and I already finished your measurements and clothing." "What? But I just-" "Here." Two plain shirts floated into my open arms, as well as two slightly thicker pants, and what looked like a strange triangular cloth that was certainly to serve as underwear. Two shoes and a pair of socks floated near my feet too. The shoes made me think of the old fashioned leather shoes. Atleast they were sturdy. The shirts were purple and green, respectively, while the pants carried the same coloration. I w ould mix them up to give more "tropical" coloring for myself. "Thanks..." "No problem." "Now could you turn around while I put them on?" Rarity rolled her eyes but did as asked. "Much better. Hey, this is pretty comfortable!" "I'm glad you like it. Now, we need to go." "But Rar-" "No buts Pinkie. I have many things to do, and I'll need your help with them." "As for me, I need to catalogue all this." said Twilight. Before they even moved, I noticed something: "Wait...where's your blue friend?" "That's true. I'm pretty sure she left back for Ponyville. She is a sore loser after all." They all giggled. Why? What was so funny? "Bye Dom-I mean Mark!" said Pinkie with a smile. I couldn't help but twitch at what she said. HOW THE FU-never mind. She must be one of those "illogical" people I've heard so much about. They have-a the special-u sixth sense. Besides, she was too cute 'n cuddly to stay permanently mad at. I was actually surprised at how fast my encounteres with these "outsiders" was going. One second, they're here, the other, they leave. On my exit of my room, I returned to the roof to finish up my work, only to see that everything had been placed like it should have been. "How did this happen?" "I finished it for you." said a familiar voice behind me. "Thank you Celestia, but I would've preferred to finish it myself." "Yes, well, it was my thanks for you trying to keep my Philomena safe despite her falling with you." "I think I would've still taken the brunt of the fall if it was one of those little ponies. I'm the bigger one here, so I have to take the brunt of the fall." "Well, I thank you anyways. You also got your new clothes from Rarity?" "Wait...you know them?" "Of course. She IS the friend of my student, Twilight Sparkle, unless you have forgotten." "No. In fact, your student came here with Pinkie Pie." "What? Why?" "Apparently, Pinkie Pie told her about me, so she wanted to learn more about my species. She was interested when I talked about the evolution, but turned green when I talked about our...society." "I'm not surprised." "Anyways, what do you need?" " I have a proposal for you." "Yeah?" "You've been working hard for the time you have spent here, so I'll give you two days without work if you do this one simple thing." "What?" "Help the royal guards with their training." "And who am I going to fight? The professionals or the rookies?" "The neophytes." "The rookies then...all right. I suppose I shouldn't go too rough on them?" "No. We don't want you to do to them like what you had done last time..." "Heheheh. So what am I going to teach them?" "Teamwork. You are very strong and magic doesn't seem too effective on you, so they are going to learn how to take on other threats by working together." "All right. When do I start?" "Tonight. Luna and I will be watching." "Perfect. When will I be called?" "I will come get you personally. I don't trust you one bit." she said while squinting at me. "*sniff* You hurt me. I thought we had something special together. You really brightened up my day." "Just be in your room when I come." "Will do."