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// Fighting for trust...and pants 
// Story: Through the roof 
// by The Psychopath 
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"Owwwww! Could ya untighten your claws?! Just because you look like a marvel of nature doesn't mean I have to 'feel' that marvel. Stupid bird."

It had already certainly been half an hour that I was looking at the castle yards. There were some nice statues here and there, although I didn't know what they represented, kind of like modern sculptures...sculptures. Where was I? Ah yes! The trees were something else in this "Equestria". Rather than just go straight and seem bland, like most trees are, these ones gave off a strange aura that made me feel like I was back at the family farm with the "Bullboy" father. They were also much healthier looking and showed immense strength that any tree should have.

However, what really caught my attention, were the ponies who kept fleeing whenever the saw me. That was hilarious, and insulting at the same time. Word was already spreading throughout the castle that I was going to be staying there for awhile, and I could already here those ponies talking bad behind my back, but, then again, why wouldn't they? I'm a giant compared to them, I'm about the same size as Celestia, if not slightly taller, the guards didn't manage to properly hurt me when they tried to subdue me, I broke out of what was supposed to be the "best" prison bars, and I came from another world. So many things about me that could be spoken of. Tired of seeing the garden, I decided to find a away onto the walls just to be able to see what this world looked like. Was the area I was in super industrialized, or was it one o' dem countreh places?


Looking around, I could see the steps to climb up to the high vantage point, which I eagerly took. These steps were really tiny! Sure, I had the portion of wall it was attached to to hang on in case I fell, but these steps were ridiculously small...although I suppose that I'm the one who is ridiculously huge here. A good stretch, and more clamping from that bastard phoenix, and I was lying over the walls. What natural beauty! If I could paint, I would remake my painting over and over just to get a perfect view of the little valley that this castle over-looked.

A small line going in between two moutains that raised themselves to the skies like giant green pillars. The forest down there reflected like morning dew, despite a little mist brewing above it. And the river, it snaked through the forest perfectly. It wasn't too random, but it wasn't too predictable either. A magnificent tapestry of diverse colors and shapes, especially with, as what I could tell, were several different birds. I couldn't exactly see them from here, but I could see a little reflection of colorful light bouncing of of their feathers. I hope those were birds. Who knows what kind of creatures live in this world if there are phoenix birds.

"Hey, monster!" yelled an unfamiliar voice.

I decided not to react and continued to stare at the setting sun. It was already that late?

"I'm talking to you! Get down here!"

*peck*

"AGH! Why did you peck my ear?! Stupid bird. *peck* HNNNGH!"

I looked down as this damned phoenic continued to peck my ear. It was one of those "guards" whose utility was about as fathomable as using putty for cement.

"Hey! You better not harm the princess' bird."

"Hm? She's the one harming me! I'm just defending myself."

"We've got a proposition for ya."

"Aye?"

"Come down and we'll tell ya."

"Fine. Just wait."

I would've loved to jump off the wall and land on the ground like a bad-ass, but, unfortunately, they're too high and I would certainly break my legs. Instead, I did it the boring way by simply jumping off the fifth step and landing back on the ground.
Even though I hated this bird's claws, I tried to calm her as my jump scared Philomena and I ended up getting smacked several times in the head with her wings.

"So, what is it that you want?"

"We think that you don't deserve to have your own room, especially with how you trated princess Celestia."

"Trated?"

"Sorry. Got a little spit in my mouth. I meant to say 'treated'."

"Ah. And how do you puny runts expect to stop me? You already demonstrated your "talents" against me earlier."

"We weren't expecting you. Now we are. Here's the deal, you beat twenty of us, and we'll leave you be. We beat you, and you go in the dungeon where you belong."

"This ought to be fun. Where do we fight?"

"Over there, in the white square that my comrades traced on the grass."

Once over there, I stretched a bit, and Philomena decided to finally let me go, just to fly onto the branch of a nearby bush. I performed the "sumo stomp" as I waited for the opposing guard to fight me. This one was rather bulky, opposed to his friends who certainly had strength, but not against me. There was quite a long moment of waiting as the other guards surrounded our "cubicle".

"...well?"

"GO!" yelled one of the guards.

I stood up to greet the guard with open arms as he charged at me. Like an idiot, I threw myself forward to grab him, but he dodged, allowing him ample time to get behind me and kick me over and lie down on me.

"Give up?" he said. My anwser? Simply standing up and watching him tumble over as he looked at me with open jaws.

"Oh...oh yeah? I got more where that came fr- *PUNT* AAAAHHHHHhhhhh....!"

"You talk too much! Well then, who is next?" I said while clapping my hands together.

"I'll do it." said another. This one was a pegasus.

"Pegasus, eh? Let's see if you're flying powers will come in handy after I grab your wings."

"I'll lift you into the air and rop you from ten feet."

*serious mode off*

"Are you kiddin gme? That's the best you could come up with? Pfff."

"GO!"

This one was cleverer than his previous buddy. He started by circling around me, expecting me to follow him around and get dizzy. What kind of idiot would do that? After noticing that it failed, he decided to rise high and try a dive bombing. A step to the side and he barely had time to break that he slammed into the ground. I bent over him with my hands behind my back and an unamused expression on my face.

"Wow. You're terrible at this. Do you guys really want to-"

"My turn."

"-ugh!"

A unicorn this time. Hopefully, he would give me a better challenge seeing as they can use magic.

"GO!"

A strange sparkling from his horn and a bolt of lightning nearly hit me. Atleast three bolts and he got tired of me. Instead, the unicorn tried to glue me in place. I just casually walked forward while he seemed to struggle tremendously. They couldn't be this weak, could they? Nah, they must be going easy on me or something. 

The guy suddenly stopped "holding" me and started to pant.

"You look tired. Let me help you with lying down. Finger push!"

This guy really tipped over as I pushed him with my finger. I did notice that it was getting darker, and I'm sure it would be time for me to go to my room.

"Can we hurry this up? I have to go to my room after this."

"Ooh yeah? Well I bet you can't deal with seventeen of us at once!"

"Seventeen? BRING IT ON!"





Luna had just finished raising the moon and was ready to make a few mores tars in the sky. However, after exiting her room, she heard strange clanking sounds and grunts. A few of the night-shift servants were running towards the source. Luna followed them.

"What is going on? What is the source of this noise?" she asked a running maid.

"It's that thing. Twenty of the guards had challenged him to a fight, and he accepted. It's been going on for an hour now."

"Oh no!"

Luna knew that some of the guards had a habit of trying to look superior n front of others, like some tried to be modest and helping. Everypony was like this, but, despite her knowing of his great strength, she was sure that twenty of the guards could have hurt him. What did she see, however, when she looked over the ledges where the servants were? A sall battleground in the garden. A few guards were strewn about, but the human was holding one of the groaning guards by both hind legs and was using him to beat those that were trying to leave the pile he made.

"So, do you still think I don't deserve a room? AH! Don't move."

Luna jumped down with fury on her face. No matter what she did, she looked radiant, especially during the night.

"What are you doing, human?" she snapped at me.

"My name is Mark Fénix. Not 'human'."

"That's true. We never did ask your name, but the question remains."

"Oh. Well, they said that I didn't deserve a room for myself, and wanted to "duel" with me. Unfortunately, they got angry after I knocked out three of their buds and ganged up on me all at once."

Luna looked rather...sceptical at what I was saying. I may be a good flatterer when it comes to what I see, but it would seem that I was still untrustworthy.

"The servants here have told us the same story, although the soldiers grouping all at once to attack you is shameful if this was indeed meant to be a "duel". It is late now, I will show you to your chambers."

"Wait...isn't that "unelegant" for a pricess to do something so menial?"

"You have proven yourself to be much for the royal guards to handle. Even if you are just wearing simple leg attire."

"Wha-AH! This is embarrasing. Do you have someone that could, perhaps, create some pants for me? And a shirt?"

"Tomorrow. For now, you must go to your appartments. Oh, and one more thing before we take you there, let go of the guard."

"Woops! Sorry."

I had completely forgotten about the guard I was holding. I would have dragged him all the way into the "chambers" if the princess hadn't showed me. Yet, I felt like I was forgetting something.

"Wait...where's the bird?"

"Philomena?"

"Yes."

"She has returned to Celestia. My sister's phoenix can't watch over you indefinately."

"True. So, can we go to the room now?"

"Follow us then, if you are so impatient. And you best start behaving around my sister, she is kind-hearted, but she can be angered, and you do not want to see her when she is angry."

"It's true that what I had called her at the room was uncalled for, but it's not my fault she's hiding her depression."

We suddenly stopped.

"What?"

"You can't see it? She regrets doing something in her past. It's super obvious to see. I mean, most people who admire art are capable of seeing these ort of things. Others, like family members, can usually see these sort of things between eachother."

"We thought she had gotten over it."

"Hmph. I'm only thirty-four and I could see that your sister has a scar that did not heal properly. Would you happen to know anything about it?"

"Perhaps, but we cannot speak of these sort of subjects so casually, even if you are as good as you say."

"I understand. Now, if you could, II'm really tired and I would like to go to bed for my work-shift tomorrow."

We went to what looked like a room for guests. It was in one of the towers that this castle held aloft on it's walls. Surprisingly, it looked like it was made more thine royalty. The huge bed with that wierd roof thing. The many windows going all around the room with very expensive looking curtains, the private bathrooms...BATHROOMS?!

"Isn't this a bit much for a prisoner?"

"You are not our prisoner. You are our temporary castle repair pony."

"Man." I said with an annoyed face.

"...right. We will be leaving now. If you try and escape, we will know, for we can see everything at night."

"Riiiight. And I'm a giant being wearing purple and who eats planets."

She looked at me with the corner of her eye and a head-lift . She looked so purdy! However, many flowers have defences, and she spoke on the other side of the door: 

"To be sure that you don't escape, we have sealed your exit with a spell. Two guards here will keep it up so long as it is not time for you to leave."

"FINE!"

"She's going away? Time for the submarine to exit port!"

That actually felt much better. I didn't realize that I hadn't...done my personal deeds in what I could assume was two days. (One?) 

"Welp, time to jump onto the-wait a minute."

Brushing my chin with my hand, I pushed hard on the surface of the bed to make sure I wouldn't end up falling through  yet another roof.

Seems stable... alley oop! *flop*  Ah! This is really comfy. I'm going to need all the sleep I can get for tomorrow. I hope my time spent here doesn't delay on just fixing walls and floors. AND I REALLY NEED THOSE PANTS TOO! MENTAL SCREAM ABOUT A MENTAL SCREAM!