*Insert title here*
By justarandombrony
One day in Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle was walking down the road with Spike, when suddenly she saw Octavia dressed like Ezio Auditore with bows instead of knives when she asked her "Hey Octavia. What's going on?"
"Don't you know? The Russians are taking over!" She replied.
"Wha-" Twilight was interrupted by Abraham Lincoln holding a SPAZ 12.
"Fore score and seven years ago, I found out that the Russians were trying to destroy our way of life." Abe said loading his shot gun. They were all interrupted by a group of Russian vampires holding houses.
"Get down!" A random pony yelled as the houses were thrown at the trio.
Out of nowhere Rainbow Dash appeared with Batman riding on her back.
"GET TO DA CHOPPA!!" Arnold Schwarzenegger yelled as the Russian vampires rushed at the group.
They all ran into "the choppa" which turned out to be a Pelican drop ship from Halo. They were greeted by Iron Will who pulled them in. Suddenly Batman jumped out and pulled out batrangs. He then threw the 'rangs at the vampires who then turned into dust.
"Got 'em." Batman yelled at the group in the Pelican. Out of nowhere Mario and Luigi jumped on Batman who was then flattened.
"Go help him." Master Chief said as he pushed Spike out of the ship. Spike landed on Luigi who jumped in the air and fell through the ground.
"Oh no! Mamma Mia!" Mario said as he ran from the baby dragon...right into Dovahkiin, who then yelled: "FUS RO DA!!!"
"Oh no!" Spike said as he was blasted back into the Pelican.
"Nope" The engineer said as his neck extended to go into his floating hat. Then Shining Armor appeared with Prince Blueblood.
The Pelican fell and landed on somepony's house. The group got out and started to fight the Russians/ Mario/ Dovahkiin. Derpy Hooves appeared with Doctor Whooves and a Weeping Angel pony.
"Oh great!" Rainbow Dash said. "The Doctor is here to help!"
The fight was never going to end when Jesus floated down to the ground holding two M60's. He gave one to Twilight who held it in her telekinetic grip.
"Lets show them who's boss!" Jesus yelled as he charged the Russians.
"LEROY JENKHOOVES!!!" Leroy Jenkhooves yelled as he charged into a group of Russians.
"FUS RO DA!!!" Dovahkiin yelled and blew Leroy back. Just then angels sang out in a chorus as Chuck and Buck, his brother, Norris fell from the heavens. Chuck Round-house kicked Dovahkiin in the face killing him instantly. He then pulled out an M134 Vulcan mini-gun from his beard.
"Open fire!" Buck Norris yelled at his brother as he blew The Horn of Gondor, summoning the dead army. Out of nowhere Big Brother rose from the ground and grabbed a stick and ate it. He then threw-up a machete.
"I'm always watching you!" Big Brother said. Shining Armor then threw Prince Blueblood at Big Brother, impaling him.
"In Soviet Russia, gun shoots you!" George Washington said as he shot a cannon at the battle. Jesus seeing this stopped the bomb with his fist and with his Jesus powers he turned the Russian George Washington into American George Washington.
"WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Princess Luna said. "cool story bro, but it needs more ponies!" She then, with her unicorn powers eliminated the fourth wall and turned every living thing in to a pony. Pinkie Pie seeing this decided to throw a massive party to celebrate.
Out of nowhere the "HAX!" guy appeared and got ready to say "HAX!", but then was interrupted by the "Yeah!" Pony who said "HAX!"
"He took my job." The 'HAX!' guy said. Just then a group of random rednecks appeared.
"He took his job!" one said.
"He took his dog!" another said.
"He broke his jaw!"
"He tickle her!"
"Took er jerr!"
"Durker Durr!" A random redneck jumped out of the crowd and yelled "Ker ker ker!" before falling to the ground and dyeing.
"Wow, this is the most random day ever!" Twilight sparkle said.
"Yeah." Spike said. "Wanna' join?"
"You bet!" she answered and they rushed into battle. Just then Angel ran in with a rocket launcher and started to blow up the place.
The battle raged on for a really long time. eventually the Russians were defeated and then Russia was blown up. The world became ponies and Equestria expanded its borders. Jesus went back to Las Vegas where he found a carer working with two dudes and a white tiger doing magic. Chuck and Buck Norris went back to heaven where they wait there for a while. The fourth wall was rebuilt stronger and beater.
A random story comes to and end as you, the reader say "Wait, what?". I may or may not make another story like this, so yeah. Thus ends the random story. You may be asking yourself "What is this loon thinking?" Well, I'm not so no. Why must all stories have good endings? Wait, mine doesn't.
*Different ending*
The Russians drive our heroes back and then Pinkie Pie becomes Pinkamina Diane Pie and bakes everyone into cupcakes and the ponies eat pie. The end!
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Authors note: Umm wow. This is my first attempt at making a story, so please judge. Tell me in the comments if you think I should make more stories like this. I am now attempting to fill space, so yeah.