--Many Stupid Plans Later--
This was it, the one plan to end them all.
Dash stood in a secluded part of Ponyville, busy holding up a cardboard cutout in the shape of a pony. Her body shook and jittered in a never ending spasm as she worked to keep it up, which coupled with her messy mane and tail gave her the look of a pony no mother would want their filly standing next to, and that's not including the plain derping eyed, crazy look on her face. Even more, she twitched her head every which way non-stop, still checking to see if the spies were after her. It'd been a few days since the incident... or maybe it was only a day ago? Dash couldn't tell anymore, as the only thing that now mattered was her plans, but still, it never hurt to make sure.
She finished working on the cardboard cutout and took a step back to appreciate her triumph. Now THIS is a plan! she chuckled, I can't wait to see the look on Twilight's face when her little "investigation" falls apart from the sheer awesomeness of my genius. I think the phrase is, "Check. Mate."
The sight of Dash's masterpiece would've made her shed a tear if she were any lesser pony. A horribly cut cardboard cutout of what was supposed to be the shape of a pony, it was drawn all over with crayon and smeared with paint, with some scribbles where the cutie mark was supposed to go. It's face was like a smiley face, with a hollow circle for the eye, no nose and a zigzaggy smile. The centerpiece of it was the words "It Was Me" written in bold paint over the stomach.
"And now to end this!" Dash said, still shaking and looking for the ever elusive spies. She screamed in a goofy, deeper voice, "I confess! It was me! You heard that right folks... I pranked Princess Celestia! Now come and get me!" and ran into a nearby alleyway and hid behind the corner of a building, still watching the cutout. "Any second now..."
"Hey, you guys heard that?"
A group of ponies walked to the cutout and stopped in a circle around it, staring at it with a confused look. Dash watched on shaking even more than usual.
"I don't get it... Is this supposed to be a joke or something?" a stallion said. The ponies next to him continued staring and shared his sentiment.
"Nah, I think it's a personification of how we all view the criminal. Like its eyes for example, notice how they're hollow to show the emptiness in his soul," another pony said.
"Then why does it look like a foal made it?"
The conversation continued on, until thirty different theories were floating around as to what the cutout could've represented.
Dash facehoofed. "It. Was. Me! I am the criminal, mwahahaha!"
"The criminal! Where?!" another stallion screamed, snorting and getting in a charging position.
The original stallion put his hoof in front of his friend and looked around, saying, "Calm down there buddy, this is obviously a failed joke by some young punk who thinks they're funny. I mean just look at it... There's no way this thing can be serious." He put his hooves around his mouth like a mega phone, "Hey, funny guy, you're bad and you should feel bad! You failed bro... failed! Let's get out of here... We wasted enough time."
As him and his gang walked away, some more ponies felt the need to voice their opinions. "Get another cutie mark!"
"You should've stayed a blank flank!"
Dash jumped out of her corner, watching her potential saviors walk away and yet another plan to end all plans end the same. "No! Don't leave! Didn't you hear me! I...! Oh nevermind." She hung her head as the light breeze knocked down her masterpiece and turned around to go back to the drawing board, freezing once the pony standing behind her came into view. It was Scootaloo.
"There you are! I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. What have you been up to?"
S-S-S-S-Spy!" Dash sprinted as fast as she could the other way, with the pony she was sure was out to get her in pursuit.
"Why are you running? I'm not mad about Sweetie Belle if that's what this is about!"
Scootaloo's words never reached her idol; Dash continued galloping until her pursuer had stopped in despair, and continued on blocks more. Her sprint ended when her face slapped against the backside of a stallion, causing her to bounce backwards to the ground.
"Hey, watch it will ya?!"
Dash shook her head and froze as the scene in front of her came into focus. A crowd of ponies stared at her, with the mothers all walking backwards with their kids pushed behind them. The rest of the crowd stepped closer. "You okay there?" a stallion said.
"Spies!" Dash screamed, jumping backwards to her feet and walking in reverse. "G-Get back! I'm warning you!"
Her backside hit what had to be the chest of another pony, stopping her. True to the feeling, a mare stood behind her, saying, "Yeah, what's wrong?"
Dash jumped away again, but found herself still making contact with another pony.
"We only want to help."
The sea of ponies closed in on her, trapping Dash as a shivering mess on the ground, unable to even respond from the sheer panic of having Twilight's personal army descend upon her. The only things she could see were their eyes, along with the indistinct and head banging chatter from their collective questions. As the seconds passed even her shivering went beyond her control. The spies had come, and there would be no mercy for her.
"Oh my... There you are!"
The crowd stepped away and formed a path as Fluttershy ran to the center where her friend lay, saying, "Don't you know what time it is? Twilight's about to start her big announcement any minute... You don't want to be late do you?"
Dash just continued convulsing.
"Oh my... You don't look so good." Fluttershy picked up her friend and got her back on her hooves. "Don't you worry now. Trust me, after hearing what Twilight's going to say you'll be back to good health in no time. Why, I just feeling like screaming myself. Now come on," she said, dragging Dash, who was still in her own world, along for the ride.
Fluttershy galloped away from the area with her friend dangling behind her and leaving a trail on the dirt from her plot. They traveled across town to the remains of the town hall where a crowd of many dozen ponies stood, with the podium back up in front of the ruins and the rows of specialized royal guards beside it. The crowd was all locked in conversation.
"So is there a point to this or what?" a pony said.
"Who knows? But apparently Princess Twilight has something huge to announce."
Fluttershy let go of Dash once at the crowd. "Here it is. Thank Celestia we reached here in time. I wonder where Twiligh-?"
The crowd erupted into cheers as Twilight's hooves became visible as she walked behind the guards. Dash got up from her episode and looked around. "Wait, the spies are gone? Where am I?"
A dead silence followed as Twilight reached the podium. Her face was emotionless, a spitting image of her brother's when a serious tone was called for. "Ponies of Ponyville, I speak to you today to tell you... oh forget this," using her magic she threw away her note cards, "It's over everypony; I figured out who pranked the princess!"
The crowd remained silent for a moment and looked at each other, no doubt taking the time to fully take in the words they had just heard. A second later they erupted into cheers and screams of pure euphoria, with the ground beneath them cracking from their stomps. Dash stood in the center of the climax, frozen and without a single thought other than the empty silence within her.
Twilight's voice boomed over the microphone, "Now, now, I know you're all excited but at least try to save some energy for when I actually say who it was."
The crowd all turned to her, screaming, "Who?!" in unison.
"Sorry, but you'll have to wait a few more hours for that. I want to announce it alongside Princess Celestia in a more formal ceremony. I'm sure you all understand, right?"
The crowd gasped and began booing, "Aww come on, just tell us already!" but as the seconds passed their screams of discontent turned to cheers once again. After all, a few more hours wasn't that bad considering they had already gone so many not knowing, and it gave them time to prepare themselves for the big reveal and ensuing, inevitable punishment.
"Can you believe it, Dash?" Fluttershy said, dancing in place, "Isn't this just wonderful?"
Dash was still incapable of responding.
"Aww... it's okay if you don't want to say anything. I can see that you're very excited," Fluttershy said, looking at her friend's jaw dropped, eyes popping out face, "And that's all that matters. Told you this would make you feel better."
And with that Fluttershy left the scene, along with the rest of the ponies there. The minutes passed, turning into ten, then twenty, then thirty, and Dash stayed right where she was, now the only pony there, and with only one thought in mind,
How could I lose?
She collapsed to the ground, still able to hold back her tears, and rested her face on it, savoring each little grain and worm that crawled over her. This would be the last time she'd get the chance to feel them, or any other of the small blessings of life she never took the time to appreciate. To her they'd always be there, and it was only now, knowing her time with them was at an end, that she could feel every grain of earth and breeze to the fullest. I... lost.
The only thing left for her to do now was lay where she was, and wait for her inevitable punishment. This truly was the end, but like Twilight had said, at least it was all finally over.
"Hi ya Dash!"