//------------------------------// // Chapter One // Story: Cross my Heart and Hope to Fly // by Tayman //------------------------------// I've never written in a journal before. I haven't really needed to before this. I know other ponies keep journals every day, but I've always thought that would be boring. No, I'm starting a journal because I need to write about a problem I ran into today. To be honest, it's a really silly problem. I can't understand why it's weighing so heavily upon me right now. I know my friends are always there for me, but I can't tell them. I don't want to worry them with this petty issue. It'll probably blow over soon anyway. The worst thing is that I don't even know why I'm feeling this way. You're supposed to be able to know what's causing a problem and fix it. If a cake comes out of the oven burnt, it's because it was baked too long. Next time, you'd set the timer for less. Yet, I don't know why I've been feeling so sad today. It's like the cake is coming out burnt no matter how long I put it in for. It doesn't make any sense, and I have no idea what to do. If only I hadn't gone to Rainbow Dash's aerial show today. Maybe I wouldn't be feeling this down. Perhaps the random thought that struck me never would have showed up. But why wouldn't I have gone? Rainbow is one of my best friends. There was no reason to think anything would happen to me there. So here I am, starting this journal. It's the only thing that's helping right now. Hopefully I won't need to keep it past tonight. ------------------- "WOOO! Look at Dashie GO!" Pinkie Pie shouted, hopping up and down as she watched the daring pegasus soar above. She and the rest of her friends were sitting in a grandstand in the park, along with dozens of other ponies. In the sky, several pegasi were sitting on the clouds, watching from above. "It sure was a good idea for Rainbow to hold this fundraiser for the Ponyville Elementary School!" Twilight exclaimed, her eyes fixed on the skies. "Oh, please. If you ask me, she's just doing this for another chance to show off." Rarity rolled her eyes, giving a disinterested glance above. "Oh, Rarity...I'm sure Rainbow is also doing it for the school. You know how she loves to help the young ponies." Fluttershy said. Rainbow began to go into a dive with legs fully extended, her body spinning like a top, until it became a rainbow colored blur hurtling towards the ground. "Whoa, nelly! We ain't seen that trick before! Just lookin' at it is makin' me wanna lose my lunch!" Applejack cheered as Rainbow corkscrewed through several clouds. As the show went on and her other friends casually chatted to one another, Pinkie Pie was speechless for once in her life. She stopped hopping, eyes glued on Dashie's every move: how she flew through the sky as if it were water, the pegasus effortlessly conquering all three dimensions. Pinkie could practically feel the wind roaring off her wings with each powerful thrust. She had seen Dash fly before, but she had never noticed just how much passion, how much purpose was expressed through the loops and twists. Rainbow had an expression of pure joy on her face, her body soaring with all the ferocity she could muster. Wow...I wish I could do that... "Let's hear it for our extremely talented flier, Rainbow Dash!" the mayor announced as Rainbow landed on the stage, an eruption of cheers echoing throughout the park. "Hey, no problem! I figured I would help out the school by doing what I do best!" Rainbow said, flexing her wings for the crowd. "Besides, that was nothing!" More cheering ensued as she grinned widely, before zipping over towards her friends in the grandstand. "Hey, did you see me up there? How'd you like 'The Corkscrew'?" "Please Rainbow, you give us shows every time we go out whether we like it or not!" Twilight laughed, her friends joining in. Pinkie just chuckled. "Still, that corkscrew was somethin' else! I'm surprised it didn't make you heave all over the place!" Applejack said, before glancing over at Pinkie. "Hey, what's wrong with you, sugar cube? You're being awful quiet." "Oh!" Pinkie exclaimed, jerking out of her gaze. "Sorry! I just spaced out a little there. You did a great job, Dash! I bet you're REALLY hungry after that. Everypony, dinner at the Daily Hay, on me!" "My, that sounds delicious!" Rarity said, her face lighting up as the six ponies began descending from the grandstand. "But Pinkie, darling, you don't have to pay for us!" "It's okay! The Cakes just paid me, and I'm making extra now from watching Pumpkin and Pound!" Pinkie beamed, bounding down the dirt road that lead into town. However, she couldn't get Rainbow's performance out of her head. It's like the sky is another playground for her. I've never seen Dash so joyful as when she's flying. She's so talented up in the sky. She peered down at the ground as she hopped, before coiling up her legs and springing off with all her might, but of course, she landed back on the road. Pinkie looked back, seeing Rainbow casually hovering above the rest of them. The pink pony sighed, the smile momentarily vanishing from her face as she slowed to a trot. "Pinkie? Are you okay?" Fluttershy said softly. "You just seemed to slow down a lot." "Fluttershy, I'm fine!" Pinkie managed to dig up one of her signature grins. "I'm just a little tired! I don't have to bounce EVERYWHERE, do I?" she giggled, but the laughter couldn't cut through the chilling feeling that was creeping up on her like high tide. Shortly afterwards, they arrived at the Daily Hay, a cozy little shack with a pointed straw roof . "Whew! I'm famished!" Applejack said as the six took their seats around a circular, wooden table. "Good thing we got here before the rush." She glanced around the restaurant, seeing only a few tables filled. "They'll probably all be stampedin' in here now that the show is over!" A light blue unicorn walked over to the table while levitating six menus, which he set down in front of the ponies. "Good evening. Welcome to the Daily Hay. Might I grab you all something to drink?" As the waiter walked away to fill their drink orders, Rarity said, "Girls, I forgot to tell you earlier at the show! You know the full spectrum-fashion line I've been working on? It's going to be featured in Canterlot Fashion Monthly!" she squealed, brimming with pride. "In a couple weeks I get to go visit and present my work personally!" "Oh Rarity, that's wonderful!" Fluttershy said, smiling gently. "You'll be a famous fashion designer in no time!" "Yeah, that's really super great! Too bad you probably won't have any time to party when you're a big shot!" Pinkie exclaimed, but this news only accelerated the cold feeling itching at her consciousness. She was beaming, but it took her more energy than usual. How am I special? She shook her head wildly at this thought, as if to dislodge it physically from her brain. The other ponies gave her a brief, awkward glance, but just chalked it up to her being Pinkie Pie. Shortly afterwards, the waiter returned with their drinks. "Don't forget, girls! PARTY at Sugarcube Corner tomorrow night! You're all invited!" Pinkie squealed, practically jumping out of her seat. It seemed a bit over the top, even for her. "Really? What's the occasion?" Rarity asked, taking a sip of tea. "Just because?" Rainbow snickered. "Yep! Just because! Who says you need a reason? Come on, you all know me better than that!" Pinkie giggled, throwing her head back and chugging down her entire glass of lemonade. "Of course, we'll all be there." Twilight smiled. ------------------------- It's funny. I had seen Rainbow fly how many times? Hundreds? I never gave it a second thought before. It was just one of those things I accepted, like the color of the sky or the taste of an apple. But then, to be jealous for some reason? To want it for myself? There's just no explanation for it. Was my mind slightly weaker that day? Did my 'silly thoughts filter' fail? It makes no sense. All that matters is that it's stuck in my head now, burrowed in my mind like a parasprite. It left me vulnerable to what happened next: when Rarity said her dresses were going to be featured in some magazine. I should have been ecstatic for her...but I wasn't. It was a just a reminder of how she's doing really important, special things and I'm not. I tried to shake these thoughts at the restaurant. I tried to be my overly hyper, excited self. I hoped this would submerge these gnawing feelings forever, but they kept resurfacing. We continued to talk and laugh, but this longing to be something more was a force field that let only the hollowest sense of joy in. But this is all just a phase. It'll all be gone tomorrow. A nice party will cheer me up! -Pinkie Pie