//------------------------------// // An annoying narrator, slightly silly dragons and one confusing costume. // Story: Crackle's Cousin the Costume // by Smaug the Golden //------------------------------// Crackle crawled around the forest. Contrary to popular belief, large female dragons which gems imbedded in them did not fly. Crackle often pondered this, and just as often discarded it as soon as she had begun pondering the opinion. Thinking was not one of her strong suits. Going walking, however, was one of her strong suits. The dragon sniffed the air with her long snout. What was that she smelled? Phoenix? The dragon discarded the thought. It wasn’t good to think about phoenixes… or things in general. The dragon pondered why she was thinking for a moment and then crashed her train of thought way too literally. The dragon crashed into the tree with bone jarring force. Or at least it looked bone jarring… Alright it wasn’t bone jarring, she simply smacked into it. Sheesh, do you want me to tell a good story or do you want me to provide every boring detail? Give a story teller some rest. Anyway, where were we? Oh, the dragon hit her head on a tree. Happy? Crackle slammed her head into a tree. The dragon glared suspiciously at the tree. Was it out to get her? Crackle didn’t like trees in general, and this large one was especially suspicious looking. It had nice long branches, beautiful blossoms and a dragon trapped in the top. Crackle let out an alarmed snort of shock. A dragon couldn’t be trapped in a tree. They were too magnificent. Why would this tree trap a dragon? Trees knew their place. Trees would never dare harm a majestic dragon, especially a tree such as this. Crackle beat one of her many feet on the ground. “Harg hurard guag,” the dragon snarled, which loosely translated to ‘release that dragon or be torched.’ I really have no idea if it meant anything else; my dragon is a bit rusty. The tree took no notice. Crackle let out a fearsome roar and lunged at the tree. Although I admit that the lunge was more of a tiny jump, the roar was enough to strike terror into any beast smaller than a chicken. The two fought with each other, tussling and clawing at one another. Eventually Crackle swung one of her many legs and knocked the dragon out of the tree. Or the tree dropped it. View it the way you want. Crackle let out a whoop of delight, and leapt out of the tree... That or the tree dropped her. Either way, Crackle landed on the ground next to the dragon. Crackle grinned. A dragon was saved. What could be a better way to spend a walk? She waited for the dragon to acknowledge her, but the dragon did nothing. Crackle stared. Why was the dragon not doing anything? She pushed the dragon with one leg. The dragon did nothing. Crackle let out a shriek. Had the evil tree harmed the dragon? She helped the dragon upright, and then let go when she saw who it was. It looked like her. Crackle examined the dragon. Why did it look like her? Why was it staring at her? Why did it look like a costume? She discarded the last thought, as well as the first two. Then a thought occurred to the green dragon. What if this dragon was a long lost relative? The dragon offered no explanation whatsoever. Crackle attempted to ponder the situation. Should she run for help? Should she smash the tree? Should she eat this dragon? Suddenly, Crackle had an epiphany. Or at least something close to an epiphany. This dragon was her cousin! That made lots of sense. Hadn’t Garble said something about a cousin? This must be her cousin. Crackle grinned. She gave her cousin a lick with her long tongue. Her cousin did nothing. Crackle sighed. Maybe her cousin didn’t like to be licked. A sudden breeze kicked up, and her cousin nodded his head. Crackle gasped. A cousin of hers didn’t like to be licked? Crackle looked ready to cry, until she heard a voice. “Come on, let’s talk about this.” Despite the fact that it sounded like Garble, Crackle decided that it must be her cousin. “Agrag,” Crackle murmured. Her cousin stared at her blankly. “How did we get lost?” Crackle thought about this. Where they lost? Where were they? Crackle decided she didn’t care. “I don’t know.” Crackle gaped. Her cousin could talk in more than one voice. How could that be? Maybe her cousin could do impersonations. Crackle decided to test this. “Autat,” Crackle said. If you’re wondering what that meant, don’t ask me. As I said before, my dragon is rusty. “Good grief. We were chasing phoenixes, and then we crashed into a tree. How hard can it be to figure out where we are? We’re like three miles from the crater.” Crackle nodded satisfactorily. Her cousin could do voice impressions. He could do the voice of Garble, the voice of Heckler, and the voice of Boulder. Her cousin was very talented. “Garaged hafed agedged?” Crackle asked. She didn’t remember chasing any phoenixes. Her cousin nodded. Crackle felt nice. The wind was nice a breeze, just enough to tilt the head of a dragon sized costume. “You know, I don’t think that we should leave the crater next time,” her cousin said. Her cousin paused for a moment before switching voice impressions. “Oh come one. We’re old enough to leave on our own. The migration isn’t anywhere near ending, so we have plenty of time to spend trying to find the crater.” Crackle looked quizzically at her cousin. Why was he talking to himself? “Agateg juateg.” Please stop asking me to translate. If you really need to know, go find a dictionary. Her cousin let out a snort. “We should never have left the crater. I don’t like it being trapped in the forest at night.” Crackle nodded sympathetically. She could understand that. Being trapped in a forest was no fun. But the two of them were fine. They had each other. She made a decision to point this out. “Dager.” Her cousin stared blankly. “Wait… Did I just hear Crackle?” A loud noise followed this, and Garble, Heckler and Boulder crashed through the underbrush. “Crackle, how are you?” Crackle stared at Garble. Why had he come? Didn’t he understand the importance quality time with ones relatives? Heckler stared at his friend. “Garble, I think she’s busy talking to that costume.” Crackle growled. How dare he call her cousin a costume? “Agater.” Boulder grinned. “We’re lost Crackle. Could you take a break from the costume and show us the way back to the crater?” Crackle shook her head. “Ahgaeteg.” Garble grinned. “We need to get rid of the costume.” And with that, the teenage dragon blew a blast of fire at Crackle’s cousin. Crackle screamed in anguish as her cousin was burnt up. “Oh, cheer up Crackle. It was only a costume. Those nasty ponies made it.” Crackle glared at Garble and his two friends. “Gatered.” Before you ask, my dragon is rusty, and I wouldn’t translate that even if I could. Crackle charged at the three teenage dragons as fast as her legs would carry her. “Run!!!!”