Always Stay Good

by Opal-Evanescent

Chapter 1: Field of Innocence

Celestia's sun shined brightly in Canterlot. The streets filled with busy ponies going off to important get-togethers, or on their way to buy the latest fashionable clothes. Everypony seemed so important. They certainly all had a knack for thinking of themselves as such. But one young mare thought of herself as anything but. A simple earth pony with a dark blue coat and black, ruffled mane. Her name was Autumn Moon. She had been sleeping on a bench at a bus stop and was now being awoken by the hustle-and-bustle and the bright sun. She groaned as she began to sit up. After rubbing the sleep out of her eyes and examining her surroundings, she pulled close to her, her saddlebag, which she had been using as a pillow. Inside was, apart from the bag itself, her one and only possession; a notebook filled with poems of her own creation. Thinking about the notebook sent her mind reeling to another time.

Autumn had started writing in this notebook when she was seven. Having first written a few seemingly meaningless lines of words that just happened to rhyme. But she adored the words she came up with and even proceeded to sing them. She was a bit embarrassed when her mother had suddenly come into her room and heard her singing, but she egged her to continue. When the song was finished, the young filly's mother told her to look at her flank. To her amazement, there was a black treble clef and orange crescent moon now on her flank. She had gotten her cutie mark. The filly jumped for joy and proceeded to hug her mother, the older mare returning the embrace.
"I'm so proud of you, dear."......

Autumn blinked, returning from her trip down memory lane. She sighed, knowing all too well that those days were long behind her. She hadn't written a meaningless poem in years. Over time, her poems evolved from being meaningless to simply being about being happy. Then when she discovered sadness, her poems were about sorrow and having to deal with unfortunate situations. When she had her first crush, her poems started to be about being in love and wanting a certain pony with you. But now, all she writes about is all she knows now; hopelessness.

She opened her saddlebag and took out her precious notebook, turning to the page with the most recently added poem. It was about remembering when one was a child and longing to somehow go back to having that innocence. To be unaware of hardships and sorrow. She knew this would never be, though. She would never again have back her cozy childhood life. She would never again hear the soft, caring voice that once belonged to her mother. And she feared that she would never again truly feel safe. Without a care for who was listening, the mare began singing the words of her poem.

Memories of the past.
They come back to haunt me now...

They return, so does the pain.
Must forget, but don't know how...

Where did my life go?
Why can't I return to my childhood?
Oh now... I have to face it..
The innocence I once had won't ever be back in me again...

Lost my sense of security.
Every step I take, I dread...

I don't know if I can get through.
So afraid I'll end up dead...

Why am I alone?
Tell me, what kind of pony deserves this?
Oh why... why must this be my life?
Why can't I be happy again?....

She stopped as she started sobbing, her tears clouding her vision. She wiped them away and saw only one pony anywhere near her. And he didn't seem to have heard her singing.
Sniffling, she put her saddlebag on and got up off the bench. She started walking down the streets of the city with only one goal in mind; breakfast. She had a very small amount of bits, so whatever she bought had to be worth it.

* * *

Stepping out of the cafe, Autumn held in her hoof a simple cup of coffee. It was black. No sugar, no cream, no added flavors,  just black. She absolutely hated coffee when it was just black. But given the prices on anything extra compared to pathetic amount of bits she possessed, she really had no other option.
Stored safely in her saddlebag was a paper bag, containing one day-old, discounted muffin. She would eat it slowly as this may be the only meal she could afford for the whole day. She had only taken one small bite before putting it back in the bag. It was nowhere near as bad as the coffee.

She walked through the streets, occasionally taking a sip of her coffee. She often wondered if the residents of Canterlot looked down on her. If they did, surely it was due solely to her homelessness. They couldn't have looked down on her because of where she came from. Many ponies from Trottingham have made a name for themselves in Canterlot.

'Especially her....'

She tried to snap herself out of her thoughts. That one mare had been invading her mind for years. Always creeping into her thoughts. Almost all the time. Thinking about her had become as common as breathing.
Autumn finally tore herself away from her thoughts enough to take another sip of her horribly bitter beverage. With her head tilted back and eyes closed, she was unable to see the pony she had just bumped into. The impact caused her to drop her coffee onto the ground, the lid popping off and the drink spilling all over the pavement.

"Oh, my gosh! I'm so sorry!" said the pony she bumped into. She had a light Trottingham accent. Just like Autumn's. She looked at the pony and her heart stopped.
Before her stood an earth pony mare with a gray coat and black mane. A pink bowtie was tied neatly around her neck, and her lavender eyes looked back at her with slight worry.
She knew this mare. She was the one who was always on her mind. Ever since the day she first laid eyes on her.
'Octavia Philharmonica.....'
She was speechless.