//------------------------------// // A Dash of Dragon // Story: Guy Talk // by JonRS //------------------------------// Guy Talk A Dash of Dragon Episode 15 “I’m Snails!” “I’m Snips!” “And I’m Spike! This is Guy Talk where we objectify females in a society dominated by them for entertainment. Today, we’re here with Vinyl Scratch and our special guest, Rainbow Dash.” “It’s great to finally be on the show.” “We got the feeling you’ve been wanting to come on for sometime. You made a pretty flashy entrance last time.” Scratch referred to Rainbow Dash blowing through the town and into their studio. “Sorry about that.” The pegasus said rubbing her mane. “Don’t be. You’re not the first pony to bust in here.” Spike informed her. “It doesn’t feel like the show’s ended until someone’s showed up out of nowhere.” Snails commented. “You’d think we’d be used to it by now.” Snips rolled his eyes. “Enough about that though. You brought something you wanted us to help you with.” Spike changed the subject. Rainbow Dash pulled a weird looking glass bottle from her bag she had brought with her. It had faces on it similar to the ones found decorating Zecora’s hut. “That’s one freaky looking bottle in it.” Snips said looking at the strange object. He could have swore on of the faces stuck it’s tongue out at him. “I got it from Zecora. It’s a transformation potion.” “Transformation potion? You mean like the spell you’ve been asking Twilight for all week.” Spike said remembering the pegasus pestering her endlessly since they became breezies. “She’s not the only pony in town with powerful magic.” Dash said holding the bottle. “Isn’t her magic like tricks and stuff?” Snails asked. “Mostly, but she assured me this was the real deal. She used it to commune with the creatures of the forest or whatever.” “Wait a minute! That sounds pretty important. Are you sure you’re supposed to have that?” Spike asked looking at the mare suspiciously. “Forget about that. I need your help specifically, Spike.” “My help? What can I help you with?” The dragon wondered. “I need the essence of a creature in order to turn into one.” “Essence? What’s that mean?” Snails asked. “I think we all know what she means. She obviously needs Spike to jerk into the bottle.” Snips chuckled knowingly. “Actually, I was thinking a little bit of fire.” Rainbow Dash said as everyone looked at Snips weirdly. “What! I was not the only one who heard the word ‘essence’ and thought of spunk.” Snips said looking around the room. “Oh, you can all go collect your own essence!” The diminuitive colt told them. “Anyway just blow a little flame into the bottle.” As Rainbow Dash uncorked the bottle, a number of spirits escaped and swirled around the room before disappearing altogether. “Are you sure this is safe?” Scratch asked worried by such a reaction. “It’s fine. Just blow into the bottle, Spike.” Dash said holding the open container towards him. Spike just took in a tiny breath and blew a small drop of flame into the bottle. The concoction blew up releasing another spirit out of the bottle. Unlike the other ones, this one had a shape similar to a dragon. It faded as quickly as it came into existence. “This is kind of scary. Are you sure you want to drink that stuff?” Snails asked. “What’s the worse that can happen?” Rainbow Dash said before taking a swig. Everyone watched as the mare downed a bit of it before stopping and exhaling. “How is it?” Spike asked. “Spicy.” She said continue to breath heavily. The mare felt her head start to spin as she felt really woozy. Everything seemed to clear up for a moment before she blacked out and hit the floor. “Rainbow Dash!” She heard everyone calling her name before finally waking up. “Ugh… what happened?” She said looking up to find Spike holding her in his arms. His eyes looking at her strangely. She put a hoof to her head to find a claw resting on her head instead. “Wow!” Spike said smiling at her. “It worked. It worked! I’m a dragon!” The pony looked over her new body. Her scales were still blue, but they glistened in the light. She tried to get up, to continue her inspection, but Spike was still holding her. “Wow!” Spike still staring at her. “You can let go of me now.” She said causing Spike to snap out of his stupor and release her.. “Oh, right! I was… uhhh..” Spike trailed off as he tried to find a reason for acting so weird. “You look great!” Snips said looking her up as she tried to stand on her new feet. She wobbled at first but managed to right herself quickly enough. She was slightly taller than Spike and much leaner. Each spine going down her tail contained all the colors that her mane held and had a much sharper look than Spike‘s. She flexed her back muscles and was surprised to find she still had wings. “Wahoo! This is way better than being a breezie! Ow!” She said flapping her wings and shooting into the air. She hit her head on the ceiling doing so. Her new form was a far more powerful flier than her old one. “Are you alright?” Spike asked as she hovered over head. “I’m fine. I just got to get used to this.” She said rubbing her head. Rainbow Dash could feel her clawed fingers moving over the area. It felt weird having fingers that moved independently, instead of a single hoof. “Try your fire breath!” Snips said excitedly. “Good idea! Okay, here goes nothing.” She said taking a deep breath, but Spike could tell she was taking in a dangerous amount of air. “That‘s too much air! You‘ll set something on fire!” Spike shouted as she unleashed a large reddish pink flame from her mouth. Everyone ducked as the flame nearly roasted the trio. “Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry. Are you guys alright?” She said floating to the floor. “I’m fine.” Snips said popping his head up. “Yeah, I’m okay!” Snails said sitting up. “You got to be more careful, Rainbow Dash! The amount of air you take in determines the size of the flame you make. You‘re lucky the station isn‘t on fire!” Spike scolded her. “I’m sorry, Spike. I shouldn’t have been playing with fire anyway.” Dash said feeling down. Spike felt bad about blowing up at her like that. “Hold on! If you want to do dragon stuff, there’s one thing you got to do.” Spike reach down into his bag next to his chair and pulled out a large green gem. “Whoa! You could probably buy a whole bunch of stuff with that.” Snails said looking at the treasure with envy. “It’s not for buying. It’s for eating.” Spike corrected him. “You want me to eat this?” Dash said looking at the gem. She had never seen a jewel as anything more than a decoration or a form of currency. Being a dragon, she could feel an almost overwhelming desire to wolf one down. “Yeah, I was going to eat it, but I figure I’d let you have it. A dragon should eat gems at least once in their life. Take it already before I change my mind.” Spike said pushing the gem into her claws. Rainbow Dash looked at the gem before looking at Spike and clutching tightly in her claws. “Thanks, Spike.” Rainbow Dash said taking the gem and biting into the corner. Her sharp teeth easily breaking through the surface of the shiny rock. As her the fragment of the gem hit her tongue, she felt a rush of pure ecstasy wash over her. The gem was perfect mixture of sweet and crunchy. In addition to being delicious, she felt a rush of energy and strength. It was like the ultimate sugar rush. Everyone watched as Rainbow Dash effortlessly finished off the rest of gem. “It’s good, right?” Spike asked as she licked the remnants from her claws. “That… was… amazing.” She said rubbing her belly. “I’m glad you liked it.” Spike said staring at her and sighing. Scratch decided to remind Spike of his relationship status. “So how’s Apple Bloom?” The question seemed to take the dragon completely by surprise. “Huh? Oh, she’s… uhh… good. Yeah, she’s good.” Spike nodded without taking his eyes off Rainbow Dash. “Just good? Usually you have a little more to say than that.” Scratch said worried about Spike’s infatuation with Rainbow Dash’s new form. “I’m sick of Apple Bloom talk. We got Rainbow Dash as a dragon on our show! Let’s talk about that.” Snips said. “Yeah, how long do you plan to stay like that?” Snails asked. “I don’t know. Zecora said she just took another swig to turn back so I figure I could stay like this as long as I want. Where‘s the bottle anyway?” She said looking for the container. “Actually, you broke it when you fell down.” Snails informed her. “What! I didn’t see any shards of glass on the floor.” She said frantically looking around for the fragments. “It didn’t leave fragments. The bottle kind of just turned into more spirits when it hit the floor and flew away. It was kind of cool actually.” Snips explained. “Zecora’s going to kill me when she finds out!” “So how long are you going to be like that?” Spike asked. “I guess until Zecora can make another potion or until she forgives me. No big deal! I’m not in a big rush to turn back anyway.” Rainbow Dash said relaxing. “Really? I was thinking we could do more dragon stuff together. I know all sorts of fire tricks and you haven‘t tried gems with regular food. It makes everything taste better. I could actually cook you something sometime…. if you want.” Spike said nervously fiddling with his claws. “That sounds awesome, Spike. We should totally hang.” “Are you sure that’s such a good idea, Spike? Don’t you think somepony might take offense to you hanging out and having dinner with Dash?” Scratch asked. “We’re just hanging out. What’s wrong with that?” Spike said shrugging off her concerns. “I wonder about that.” Scratch said crossing her hooves. She didn’t think Spike would ever cheat, but something about the way he was looking at Rainbow Dash since she became a dragon made her worried he might neglect Apple Bloom. “Let’s get to the questions.” Snips said. “Okay, we got a lot questions, but for the sake of time, we’ll try to answer two. Our first question comes from Masmium. How does it feel to do a sonic rainboom?” “Oh, it’s crazy! The world becomes a blur and your heart is practically beating out of your chest. The wrong move could send you hurdling into a spin that could spell instant doom.” “Whoa! Do you think you could do one now?” Snips asked. “With this body, I feel faster than ever! I could probably do something even cooler.” She said flexing her new light blue wings. “Your wings are beautiful.” Spike mentioned. “Ummm… you know I had wings before, right?” Rainbow Dash said unable to recall Spike ever complimenting her wings before. “I guess I never really looked at your wings before.” Spike shrugged. “You never saw my wings before! I’m a pegasus pony! You‘ve seen me flying! How did you not notice my wings before?” She shouted. “I don’t get it. Why are you angry? I complimented you.” Spike said confused by her anger. “I’m angry because you never made this much of an effort to hang out with me or be nice before.” “So you’re mad because I’m being nicer to you than before?” Spike still not fully understanding her anger. “I’m mad because you don’t seem to care about me unless I’m covered in scales and breathing fire.” “Th-that’s not true. I mean… it‘s just-” “Whatever!” Dash said turning her back on Spike. “How about that other question?” Scratch asked trying to ease the tension. “I guess.” Dash said expelling smoke out of her nose. “Oh, good. It’s about wings.” Scratch said wondering if she should ask it. Dash just shot Spike a mean look as if it was somehow his fault that someone chose that topic. “Go ahead and ask. It’s fine.” Dash sighed. “This one’s from Rejigged. Do you ever get wingboners while flying and is it dangerous?” “Wingboners?” Snails was confused by the term. “It’s a pegasus thing. When they get horny, their wings stiffen and stick out.” Snips explained. ` “Aren’t Scootaloo’s wings always sticking up though?” Snails wondered. “I asked her and it’s definitely not cause she’s horny. I learned that the hard way.” Snips said rubbing his cheek. “It happens, but you can usually glide to the ground or flap just enough to slow your fall. I never really heard of anyone falling out of the sky because of it. Also not everypony with their wings out is technically horny. It’s really a matter of preference. Some ponies like to keep at their side and others like to let them hang.” “I wish I’d have heard that sooner.” Snips sighed. “Hold on! We have Zecora on the line. I’m patching her through.” Scratch said. “Rainbow Dash, you thieving mare! Reveal yourself, I know you’re there!” “Hey, Zecora. How’s it going?” Dash chuckled nervously. “If I had I known you’d steal from my hut, I would have kept my big mouth shut.” “I was just borrowing it, Zecora. I was going to return it.” “You play with magics you can’t understand. Do not drink from that bottle or things will really get out of hand.” “Let’s say I did drink from the bottle and then dropped it by accident causing it to break. How bad would that be?” “This joke of yours had better be fake. Recreating everything would take a couple of years, give or take.” “A couple of years! I can’t stay like this for a few years.” Rainbow Dash panicked. She liked being a dragon, but she liked being a pony more. “Luckily, there is still some small hope to turn back now. You must return the essence somehow.” “The essence! I used Spike’s flame as the essence.” “Return the flame to the dragon’s mouth. Do it soon and let it out.” Spike and Rainbow Dash looked at each other as they considered the awkward proposition. “So I have to spit into Spike’s mouth?” “It must be fresh and you cannot risk a miss. In order to return to a pony, you’ll need to kiss.” “A kiss!” The two of them exclaimed. “I don’t make this suggestion without cause. I know this might make Spike pause. Unfortunately, this is the only way. Your only other solution is several years away.” “I can’t make Spike do that.” Rainbow Dash sighed. “I’ll do it.” Spike said. “Why? You’re dating Apple Bloom. Won’t she be mad if we do this?” “She’d be even madder if I left you like that because of her. Besides, you’re right. I was treating you differently. Before I found out they were egg murdering jerks, it was actually kind of nice to hang out with other dragons. I wasn’t Spike the dragon. I was Spike and it was nice. When you became a dragon, I thought I could feel that way again. I ended up treating you differently because of it. This is the least I can do.” “Do you think we could hang out sometime after this?” Dash asked. “I’d like that.” Spike smiled. “Maybe you want hold off on that after you kiss. I don‘t think Apple Bloom would appreciate it if you two had dinner after this.” Scratch pointed out. “Right.” Spike chuckled. “Maybe wait awhile.” Dash added. “I got to say this is kind of hot. You sure you aren’t going to enjoy this at least a little?” Snips asked. “Shut up!” Spike said blushing a bit. He had no idea if this kind of thing was done amongst dragons or what. He just wanted to help Rainbow Dash out. Still, it felt kind of naughty in a way. “Spike must take the fire deep within, only then will the transformation end.” Zecora advised. The two of them stood up and faced each other. Each one a little nervous and apprehensive about what was about to transpire. “Here goes nothing.” Spike gulped as he leaned forward. “Y-yeah.” Dash said closing her eyes. As their soft, scaly lips met, Rainbow Dash could feel the warmth of his essence resonate deep inside of her. A soft green glow could be seen making it’s way from her stomach and up her throat. She could feel Spike’s essence roll of her tongue and into his mouth. As his flame left her body, Rainbow Dash found her body enveloped in a white light before passing out again. “Hey, Rainbow Dash! Are you alright? It worked! You’re a pony again.” Spike told her as he tried to wake her up. “Thanks, Spike! I appreciate it.” She answered getting back to her hooves. “I hope you think twice before you take my things. Next time could be far worse than dragon wings.” Zecora warned. “I promise it won’t happen again.” Rainbow Dash said enjoying being a pegasus again. “Maybe I could use that new potion in a few years.” Snips asked. Zecora simply hung up leaving him with a dial tone for an answer. “I think we can end the show on that note. I’d like to thank and apologize to everyone who listened to this. I’m Spike and this is Guy Talk signing off.”