//------------------------------//
// The Awesome Arrival of Kiwi Blitz 
// Story: The Misfortune of Kiwi Blitz 
// by KiwiFreakinBlitz 
//------------------------------//

So, with the revelation of Rainbow Dash being my sister, I was able to figure a couple of things out. It's funny how the mind works when subjected to unexpected situations, isn't it?

Well, anyway, upon hearing that piece of information, I stopped dead in my little hoof tracks in the doorway. I blinked once. Then again. And then it all just sorta 'clicked' for me. Questions that I had slowly been forming in my brain were answered in one fell swoop of thought, a glorious conquest over confusion and my role here in the extremely green body of a young pegasus filly. 

I remembered that, Kiwi Blitz, was in fact an OC of mine...I had actually been pretty miffed that I was in the big, strong, adult body of the old Fertmeister, and I was convinced that the old dude who sent me here had tricked me. But then I remembered something. I had asked him if he could make me an OC of mine, and he said yes. I never actually told him which OC I wanted to be, so as far the nutcase was concerned, I would imagine, he didn't stray from the perimeters of the deal one iota. Huh...that means that at that inevitable point in the future that I grow frustrated and disheartened in my situation, I can't blame all my troubles on him....Bogus. 

Though, really, I don't think Kiwi should count as an OC. I mean, I only pictured her in my head one day while contemplating a character to roleplay as. I never actually got to flesh her personality and background out. All I did was say; “This is Kiwi Blitz, she is green, she has wings, she's somehow totally related to Rainbow Dash.” and fantasized about chilling with my vague relative in Ponyville for an hour or two.  Don't give me that look, you know you've had pony-related fantasies and have no right to judge me. Yeah, that's better, glad we understand each other. 


Another thing that clicked for me was the old man. Somehow, he had known about about Kiwi without me telling him about her. He just shook my hand, scattered me like dust in the wind, and bam! I was the little filly with the big wings and long bangs(seriously, they keep falling into my face, it's kind of annoying...). And, the only being capable of that kind of mind-reading could only be the patchwork god of chaos...Discord. 

I mean, it's the only explanation that fits, right? I've read enough fanfics to know it just had to be him, ya know? I mentally kicked myself, because thinking back it was sooooooooooo obvious! The eyes, the mismatched suit, the snaggletooth and the fu manchu mustache! I knew he felt familiar, I just was caught off guard by his appearing as a human. 

Though, I suppose you really shouldn't expect a powerful being like Discord to be predictable.....but wait, if all those fanfics are true, and he really does make a habit of sending all of us to Equestria, then wouldn't that mean he's being uncharacteristically consistent? My little face frowned in thought. Something about imagining Discord being predictable seemed wrong...

“Kiwi!' the call of my mother's voice broke me out of my thoughts. I looked up to see the beautiful mare and the rogueish stallion looking at me expectantly from the platform. “Hurry, sweetheart, you're going to be left behind.” 

I gave a small, hesitant smile. “O-oh! Coming...Mom!” I replied and trotted into a small gallop to catch up. My mom shot a look at my dad, who just grinned in a laidback fashion and shrugged, before they turned around and resumed walking towards town. I fell into pace with the two of them, noticing how small I was. It was really rather unsettling being, I'd have to guess, two feet tall. I blow upwards to rid my vision of the emerald locks that needed a serious trim, and noticed I only came up to just under my parents shoulders. 

I didn't know if I'd ever get used to that, being so small. Back home, I was above average in height, and was three feet at the shoulders. I was a huge beast of a young man who played varsity football and never let the defensive line get breached. I went to the gym three times a week, and I'll tell you bro; I did even lift. 

So, to be this small, thin, cute technicolor talking pegasus was a huge step away from what I was used to. It was almost as weird as thinking about the two ponies leading the way to be my 'parents'. 

I glanced up with my big malachite eyes and studied the two ponies chatting quietly before me. 

Sunflash, I had gathered was his name, looked so much like Rainbow Dash you'd be hard pressed to not think about a relation between the two. Really, the only difference between the Way Past Cool(tm) Element of Loyalty and this older male was the mane and the eyes. While Rainbow Dash had her signature rainbow mane and tail, Sunflash's mane was a dark skyblue, with some grey starting to show through. And Dash's magenta color irises she certainly didn't get from her father, as the older stallion's eyes were a golden yellow, with flecks of amber sprinkled in that twinkled when he laughed. And the dude laughed a lot. I was hard pressed not to giggle(oh god, the girly sound would shrink my manhood if I didn't already lose it!) in his presence, the guy's laughter and good humor was infectious. 

Island Dusk was no different from me. Whenever her husband cracked a joke or laughed, she couldn't help but titter quietly behind one hoof. The unicorn mare held herself completely different from the way Rainbow Dash did, and was much more serious and no-nonsense than Sunflash, that it was mind-boggling to think that she ever produced a pony as brash, bold, arrogant and hotheaded as Rainbow. As we walked along the hard dirt road, our hoof ringing out as if we were traveling over a cobblestone road,  I listened in to the conversation they were having. Apparently, Island Dusk was a famous supermodel, rivaling Fluer de Lis or however you spell it, and she was actually getting ready to go on a world fashion tour. 

Sunflash would apparently be going with her as a body guard. He had retired from the weather team years ago, when it was getting too much for him to handle, and that's when he'd met Island Dusk in a bar, and they'd fallen in love at first sight. I knew this because they got uncomfortably lovey-dovey at the memory and were rubbing their noses together and baby talking pet names to each other.

“An dat was when I fownd my Sugar-Wugar,' Sunflash cooed. 

“An I fownd my wittle Sunbear~' the unicorn said sweetly, wiggling her nose against her husbands, as they laughed. 

For some odd reason, I found myself gagging.

“Augh, gross!' I complained in exasperation, shaking the cutesy talk out of my little green head. I may not know them very well, but if I was their young daughter, this was my right to be appalled by PDAs by my parents. Heck, when I was in my early 30's I still reacted that way to my parents so much as giving eachother a chaste kiss! 

Sunflash just laughed his raspy chuckle, and my head shook a little as he ruffled my mane. “Sorry, Ki. We forgot you were there!,' he grinned lazily. I couldn't help but feel a small grin of my own forming. “Kids never do get used to the idea of their parents being in love, eh? I know I always cringed when your Gram and Gran so much as pecked each other on the lips. Eyuck!” The grown stallion shivered at a repressed memory of parental affection, and I liked the guy even more. He was pretty cool! I could see him being my pops. I bet Rainbow Dash is how she is mostly in part of this guy. 

“I know right?” I grinned playfully at him. “It's so wrong, because they're soooo ooooollllld...” 

He rolled his eyes, and scooped me up into a headlock to give me a noogie. “I'll show you old, Squirt!' he said with mock offense and I couldn't help but lament my late manhood as I let out a giggle of delight. This elicited a laughed of affection from Sunflash, and a smirk of amusement from Island Dusk. 

“Come on, dear,' she said after a while, playfully swatting Sunflash in the side with a bit of ocean blue magic. “We're gonna be late. We're meeting Rainbow Dash and her friends at the library at 4-o'clock, remember?” 

Sunflash paused in his good-natured child abuse and glanced upwards. I followed his gaze, and saw a large clock tower in the center of Ponyville. The big timepiece churned away the seconds, as the hands on it's face indicated we had seven minutes till four. He nodded in agreement and let me go. “Yeah, we don't wanna keep Dash waiting. You know how impatient she can be...” he relented, and Island Dusk nodded in satisfaction as we started down the street again. 

I took the time we were walking to glance about Ponyville with awe and excitement. The show did a good job of expressing how peaceful and colorful the little village was, but failed to do something else: express just how big this 'little' village was. I looked all about me with wide-eyes and a grin. This was so awesome! I'm actually in Ponyville! I laughed silently to myself as I absorbed my surroundings, recognizing landmarks and stores, and marveling at ones that haven't been seen in the show yet. All the buildings were the simple stone and wood constructs like on the show, with some differences between houses and store fronts. While the houses were all rather uniform in appearance, each of the stores were different colors and had varying details that set them apart from the others. Quills & Sofas was readily noticeable with the large sign of a sofa and a quill hanging over the front and the large bay windows that displayed multiple love seats and recliners. As we walked through the market place, I noticed one little store to the side that was immaculate, almost as if the owner had OCD and everything had to be just so; that was 'Button Stitch's Notions'. I wondered idly if that was were Rarity got some of her supplies...

As I looked about at all the wonderful shops and locations, I couldn't help but grin big at the background ponies I recognized by name. There was fan-favorite Ditzy/Derpy, whom I waved to while hopping a bit. The grey mare with the blonde mane and mismatched eyes blinked and then smiled cutely and waved back, taking her attention away from delivering a package to somepony, and instead of placing it on the stallion's hooves, she shoved it into his mouth by accident. I winced and quickly turned away. Nobody could blame me if I pretended I didn't see anything, and that's what I was gonna do. What mailmare? I haven't the foggiest of what you're talking about! Good day sir! I said good day! 

Moving on from my alleged fault in some alleged mishap, I looked over to a little park area in the eastern area of Ponyville, and giggled as I waved to a certain mint green unicorn and candy-maned earth pony. Lyra smiled and waved back eagerly as she sat awkwardly on the park bench, Bon Bon waved back with a weak smile, as if her roommate/marefriend/best friend was embarrassing her. Lyra looked over at Bon Bon with a confused eyebrow raise and said something I could hear. Based an the nervous way Bon Bon had denied whatever was said, I'd imagine she was asked if something was wrong, and had told Lyra that nothing was wrong and everything was fine. What a good friend, not wanting to hurt her roommate/marefriend/best friend's feelings. 

This went on for the rest of the trek to the library. I waved at Roseluck and the flower girls as they sold their delightful blossoms. I grinned at the slow-witted antics of Snips and Snails, as they were discussing a plan to became more 'macho'. I enjoyed a a free sample of a new recipe for banana bread that Ms. Cake was passing out to pedestrians (OH GOSH was it yummy!~). I blushed as I got a wave from Cloudkicker and Blossomforth, who both double blinked in confusion to my reaction. I shook my head as a goblin stealthily stole an apple from Big Mac's apple cart, oh those goblins!~

…Wait. 

WHAT?!

I stopped in my tracks and did a double take of the scene, unsure if I had seen everything properly. Yep, I wasn't going crazy. Leaning out from a alleyway shrub behind the Apple family's cart, was a tiny little green creature. It stood roughly at 1 ½ feet tall, with stubby little legs and lanky arms ending in wicked looking yellow claws. It's face was pinched and vaguely dog-like in appearance, with big floppy bat-like ears and glowing red eyes. I couldn't believe my eyes, there really was a freaking goblin stealing from one of my favorite characters! It snatched an apple and opened it's mouth to take a bite, it's jaw loaded with so many sharp teeth it was a wonder how they fit in it's mouth. 

“HEY!” I shouted at the tiny little green thing, and it's head whipped around to look at me. It froze in mid motion, then dropped the apple and bolted down the alley. “Oh no you don't, you little bastard!” I galloped as fast as I could after the little guy, vaguely registering Island Dusk calling after me. 

“Scuse me!' I said to Big Mac as I dart behind his cart and down the alley. 

“Eeeyup.” I heard him respond, nonplussed. Man, that guy was unflappable. Granted he didn't see the little snot, but you'd think he'd have questions for some strange filly squeezing by him and run down an alley. But nah, Big Mac is like a honey badger, he don't give a shit! Like BOSS! Insert other appropriate meme here! Yeah, Big Mac's cool.

I gave chase down the tight squeeze, surprised and thankful for how light a pegasus's body was. I ran faster than I ever hoped to, and soon saw the goblin fugitive running along on all fours. I was grateful that the thing was wearing a loincloth, otherwise this would've been a much more horrifying chase. 

“Stop! Get back here!” I shouted as I closed the gap between us. 

The creature turn to view me over one shoulder and yelped in surprise, before doubling his effort to get away. I grit my teeth and put the pedal to the metal as well. No way was this thieving little punk gonna get away from me! Not to mention how cool it was to actually see a real goblin!! All those years of Dungeons and Dragons had paid off!!...okay, not in the way I had expected, to be sure, but still. 

The goblin quickly turned left down another alley, turning on a dime with little effort. 

I was not so lucky. 

I was so focused on catching the little bastard that I tried to take the turn the same way he did, not slowing down a bit, and it was then I realized my mistake. The goblin had nice, grippable claws to give him traction on the dusty dirt road and so he didn't need to slow down for that kind of a turn. I, however, had hooves. 

With a start I slipped about as if I was trying to ice skate and not being good at it, and fell on my side, skidding into the corner of the adjacent alleyway with an 'omf!'. Ow, that really hurt... I got to my fee-er, to my hooves gingerly and looked down at my barrel, noticing an already visible bruise forming from my intimate contact with the brick wall. Strange, how the bruise showed through my fur, but I didn't linger on it. I trotted through the alley that the goblin had escaped through, but to no avail. I had hoped there would be some kind of evidence or clue as to where the little thing had gone, but I apparently wasn't that lucky. 

“This isn't over, you over-used level 1 encounter....” I muttered in to the air, scowling in what was probably a cute manner, but I digress. 

“Hey Kiwi! Where's the fire?” a voice came from above me and I looked up to see Sunflash flying overhead, coming down for a landing next to me. His eyes took a look of concern when he noticed the large splotch on my side. “Ouch, that is a wicked bruise! What happened? Why did you run off like that?” He gently touched my side with one wing, and I flinched slightly as it examined the bruise. 

“I...I saw somebody-I mean, somepony stealing an apple. He ran away and I tried to catch him, but he got away...” I explained slowly, mostly because of the pain in my side, but also because I wasn't sure he'd believe me if I had told him I saw a little green man. “I didn't take a corner right, and eat the dirt because of it. It's not that bad, really...”

Sunflash leveled a frown at me. “Young lady, what were you thinking? That was really dangerous! If somepony is mean enough to steal from another pony like that, they could've done something much worse to you,' he scolded me, which was a bit of a surprise based on his character so far, but hearing the concern in his voice for his daughter made my ears droop and I glanced at the floor in shame. “Now, I know how much you look up to your sister and everything, but you're too young to go gala-vanting all on your own like that. You should've told me or your mother about it and let us handle it. You're just a little filly and I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you....You're lucky you got away with just a little bruise. Promise me you won't do this kind of thing again.” 

I never felt so small in my life. Of course he was upset, he sees me as his daughter, his baby girl. His flesh and blood, and I recklessly ran after some unknown creature without some much as a heads up to what I was doing. And he was right, I realized, as I remembered that the little goblin has vicious looking claws and teeth...Who's to say it couldn't have ripped me to shreds and eaten me up? I shudder a bit at the idea of my time in Equestria ending as something's bowel movement...No thanks!

“I promise....” I said sadly, ashamed of myself. I couldn't help how disappointed I was in myself, for letting down Sunflash. Maybe it had something to do with being Kiwi Blitz, but it didn't really matter. I felt bad. 

I felt myself pulled into a tight embrace and my eyes widened in surprise as Sunflash hugged me. I hesitated for a second, before lightly returning the gesture. It felt a little awkward to be hugging him, but at the same time it felt kind of good...

“I'm glad your okay.' he said before pulling back and looking at me at forelegs length. He grinned. “And don't tell your mother I ever said this, but I'm proud of you for doing what you did.”

I blinked in confusion. “You are?”

Sunflash nodded. “Yep! I'm definitely not happy you did it, but I am proud you felt the need to help somepony who was being taken advantage of. Anypony that would steal from another is scum, and I'm glad you can recognize that.” he chuckled and gave me a gentle noogie. I couldn't help but smile up at him as he winked. “Now come on, your mother is probably having kittens about how late we're going to be.” 

I nodded and followed after him as he lead the way back to the main street. I couldn't help but hum a little bit, happy as I was. I was right before; Sunflash is the coolest dad ever!

We exited the alleyway from behind the apple cart, and again we apologized to Big Mac for the inconvenience, who once again took it in stride. Man, Big Mac is pretty awesome too. 

I found myself in the desperate embrace of a worrying mother once we managed to get back to Island Dusk. She scolded me, told me loving things, scolded me again, fretted over my bruise, and lovingly scolded me. It took a minute to reassure her that I was okay, with some help from Sunflash, before she was satisfied and we walked down the rest of the way to the library. Mom decided to walk next to me and refused to let me out of her sight after that. I looked at all the smiles and grins of everypony in the area who saw us and felt my face flush in embarrassment.

A few minutes later and the large tree of our destination loomed in the near distance. Walking along the last bit of street we had to trek, I noticed that Twilight lives very close to Rarity, as Carousel  Boutique was maybe only a block away from the 'treebrary'. Interesting...

With Sunflash leading the way, we made it to the front door of the library and walked right in, since we were expected. The well-made door swung open slowly and the three of us stepped inside, only to be greeted by darkness. Sunflash and Island Dusk blinked and looked around in confusion, but my eyes lit up knowingly. Ah, yes....I knew what was coming. 

“Are you sure this was the right place?” Dusk asked Sunflash.

“Ofcourse it is, it said so in the letter.' he said defensively, before stepping forward into the blackness of the library. “Hello?” 

Suddenly, the lights flashed on and I congratulated myself inwardly for being savvy. 

“SURPRISE!!!!!”

In a flash of good-natured chaos, balloons and streamers fell from the ceiling, all kinds of ponies seemingly jumped out of nowhere and greeted us with humongous smiles, and the most humongous of them all belonged to a very familiar pink mare who surprised us the most. 

“Welcome to Ponyville, Dashie's family!” Pinkie Pie popped out of the door itself, making us jump in surprise. She seemed to have devised a costume that hung onto the door itself, making it look bigger than it was, kind of reminding my of that ninja disguise were they blended into the walls with convincing camouflage. Very clever, Pinkie, very clever. 

The pink mare was very similar to her show depiction, though you have to see it in person to really get all the details that aren't made apparent in the animation. Pinkie had a light pink coat, with a darker pink mane and tail. Up close, her poofy, curly hair style looked like it had the texture of cotton candy, and each individual strand was visible no matter how deep in her mane it went, it was pretty amazing actually. Hard to describe to you guys, again, you'd have to see it in person. Her big, blue eyes shone with a love for life and an curiosity in all around her. My god...she had just the most beautiful blue eyes I'd ever seen....they were just so blue and enthralling.....Like the sky itself was smiling at you. Her eyes were so pure and innocent, they could charm a baby bird out of it's nest. I had to blink a few times to stop myself from being hypnotized by the party pony. 

“Oh my gosh it is so great to finally meet you guys, I've heard so much about you from Dashie, she's just been super duper excited, like that one time I heard about the legendary cake maker Chiffon and how he was making the masterpiece of his career but wasn't gonna make cakes after that, and so this was his last cake, like, ever and he was raffling it off to one lucky pony to eat all for themselves and I bought a raffle ticket and I was totally nervous, because what if I didn't win and somepony else got the scrumdiddlyumptious cake that I've been dreaming about for days and then I was a silly silly head because I did win and then I got the cake and got to share with all my friends, she's totally that kind of excited, and has been like Twilight when planning this party and -umhmfghmgb!” we were saved the legendary fast-talking abilities of the pink one by a cyan colored hoof in the mouth, which ofcourse didn't seem to stall Pinkie at all, as she continued on with her tirade despite having her mouth full. 

Rainbow Dash appeared before us, rolling her eyes at her best friend's antics, and then looked at us with a happy smile. “Hey guys! Sorry about Pinkie, she's-”

“Just being Pinkie?” I 'guessed' what she was gonna say, and Dash grinned down at me. 

“You said it!' she agreed, and in a blur of rainbow colors scoops me up into a tight hug. “I missed you, Kiwi! How ya been?” 

I yelped in pain slightly as she squeezes my bruise. She looked at me with a quizzical expression, and I forced a grin. “Been alright, um,,Sis.' I laughed nervously. “Just got a bit of a bruise that you're squeezing, that's all...”

The Awesome One(tm) put me down and looked me over, before finding the bruise. She whistled low and shook her head. “That's a wicked bruise, sis... How'd you get that?” she asked, giving me a small sense of deja vu. 

I shrugged like it was no big deal, trying to look cool in front of my big sister. “Eh, I had a little crash. Nothing to worry about. I'll tell you about it later.” I said, trying to like aloof. 

Rainbow Dash grinned and ruffled my mane with a hoof. “Yeah, that's cool,' she said, winking at me. “I'm sure I got some stories to tell you too. We'll make a night of it, chyeah?”

I smiled and nodded eagerly. 

Rainbow Dash nodded as that matter was settled and flew to Sunflash, tackling him with a firm hug, both of them laughing as they sprawled on the ground. 
“Hahahaha! Oh, take it easy on your old man, will ya?” the stallion laughed and noogied his eldest daughter. 

Rainbow Dash smirked as she let herself by noogied. “Oh yeah, you getting to old to hang any more? Is that what you're saying to me?' she teased with a big grin. “And here I thought you were cool.”

Sunflash gasped and narrowed his eyes. “I am the coolest pony ever and you know it!” he says, with a growl.

Dash grinned smugly and got right in our dad's face. “Maybe a long time ago, but newsflash old man,' she said with a similar growl. “I'm 20% cooler than you, Mr. 'coolest pony ever'. You're nothing but a has been now.....”

I blinked uneasily at this strange confrontation, unsure of what I was watching. I looked to the rest of the ponies in the party, but they weren't paying any mind to what was going on, doing their own thing and having a good time. I looked up to Island Dusk so see what I should be feeling, but her face was a mask. I jumped at the sound of raucous laughter and turned back to see Sunflash and Rainbow Dash with a foreleg around each other's shoulders and giving each other an affectionate squeeze. 

“That's my girl!,' Sunflash laughed, fondness in his voice. “Never accept anything less than the best, Dash!”

“As if you gotta tell me,' Rainbow said, puffing out her chest. “I am so awesome, I never let anyone down, especially not you Dad.” 

Sunflash grinned and nodded his approval, and came to stand next to me as Island Dusk stepped forward, tentatively. I instantly noticed the change in demeanor in my older sister. She stiffened ever so slightly, in the shoulders and the wings, and while she still smiled that trademark grin, I saw it didn't reach her eyes. Upon further inspection, Island Dusk had a similar body language. The tension was so thick, you'd need a +6 Sword to cut it.... 

I glanced up at my dad, and notice he wore his lazy grin, but he watched the exchange with some worry in his eyes. 

What the heck was going on?

“It's good to see you....Rainbow,' Dusk said hesitantly, giving a hopeful smile. 

“Uh....yeah, totally...' Rainbow said, sounding forced. “You look good, Island Dusk....but you'd have to be, since you're a model, right? Heh heh...heh...” 

Island Dusk slowly nodded and forced an awkward chuckle. “Yes...heh...”

And for a few minutes the two of them just stared at each other, rubbing there frontlegs together in such an uncomfortably awkward manner, it was almost literally painful to watch. 

Rainbow Dash looked up, a serious expression on her face. “Look....I don't want you to worry about Kiwi while you're gone, okay?' she said softly, but with conviction. “I won't let anything happen to her...She's my sister and I love her. I promise you I'll look after her.” 

Wait, what now? Did I miss something. 

Island Dusk smiled again, this time it was less forced than the first. “I know you will, Rainbow Dash....I trust you.” she said and together they had a cautious embrace, as if either one of them would stab the other at the drop of a hat. 

“What are you guys talking about?” I piped up, my cute voice laced in confusion. Boy, was I lost. 

Rainbow Dash and Island Dusk broke their embrace and blinked at me. 

Sunflash chuckled and pet my head with a hoof. “Oh, there you go again,' he shook his head. “We told you before, Ki, you're gonna be staying with your big sister for a while.”

I blinked, then I blinked again and looked up at him. 

“What?” I asked, my vocabulary vast and mighty. 

“We can't bring you with us while your mom is on her fashion tour, so Rainbow Dash volunteered to take care of you while we're gone.” Sunflash explained.

“We'd love to take you with us, honey, really we would,' Island Dusk spoke up and she approached me and gave me a big old hug. “But you can't afford to be out of school for a year, so you're going to live with your sister Rainbow Dash and go to school here, in Ponyville.”

...School? I'm gonna have to go to elementary school again?! How uncool! This can't be happening, I am grown man!....I just can't physically prove it...

Wait a minute, what was that about...?

Rainbow Dash strutted up and put an arm around him. “Yeah, no worries, little sis! It's gonna be a great chance for us to bond and stuff! It's gonna be totally awesome!' she grinned down at me. “Just wait and see.”

That's right, I may be going to school again, but I'll be living in Ponyville...with one of my favorite characters, who is now my big sister. I smiled big and nodded back at her. 

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.