//------------------------------// // Why can't you just laugh? // Story: My little Short Stories // by Paradise Oasis //------------------------------// Why can't you just laugh? The mind of Surprise Celebrations... a mired morass of chaos and insanity that defies any sort of logical thought or coherent idea, it has been the source of equeal amounts laughter and tears for the ponies of Ponyland. Even Wind Whistler cannot begin to comprehend the maelstrom of craziness that brews in that noggin, and ponies came come to just except that Surprise is just Surprise. But what if we could, just for a few moments, peer into that madness, and seek out the only strand of sanity in her brain? Here, in the only page of her diary (yes, I went into her room and swiped it, she owed me for writing in my journal) that wasn't covered in squiggles and crayon drawings she my hve recorded the awnser. Written right after Ember's rescue from the diamond dogs, it's the most coherent entry in the entire book... but that's not saying much. *Sigh* Here we are again... my friends in trouble, ponies fighting a bunch of bad guys who want to hert us, yadda yadda yadda. Same old song and dance, different day. As always, we'll kick their sorry flanks in, and make em' go crying home to thier little mommies. These diamond dogs are no different that Tirek or those dumb witches or the goat with the bell or even that dumb pig lady, and it'll end the way it always does. The same old boring Dream Valley routine- what a pathetic joke! All these mares around me, they all think they're actually accomplishing something! Can't they see how much of a big cosmic prank it all is? Fight another bad guy, live another day. Any minute one of these stupid monsters could finally get the drop on us- maybe some dragon with roast us, or some troll will make us into dinner. Maybe some enchanter will put a curse on us and melt us into Swiss cheese. Both we and our silly-willy lives could end at any given moment, yet they all treat is like it's all serious and all actually means something. HA! Like I said, all a pathetic joke. I mean, I can tell better jokes in my sleep, and there's no one who can make a funny better than me! So that's why I've made it my life's mission to make everyone laugh, to get em' all to get a little amusement out of this miserable existence that's over in the blink of an eye. I don't plan parties like great-great- I-don't-know-how-many-greats grandma did, but I'm waaaaay better at pulling pranks and gags than she was... and boy, have I pulled some doozies over the years! But so many ponies don't laugh with me when I pull my pranks, why is that? When I was a little filly in Hoofkaido, I saw how sad and upset everyone was when grandpa died, so I tried to liven things up a bit by putting on his samurai armor, and trotting right into the funeral wearing it. You shoulda seen how everyone was running and screaming, and begging for mercy from the 'angry, unappeased ancestor ghost'. But when I took the helmet of and they saw it was just me, Mommy Celebrations got angry and smacked me. And at the cherry blossom festival one year, I hid a whole bunch of frogs into my kimono, and let tham all go just as the kabuki performers were starting there act. You shoulda seen that one mare scream, when a frog jumped into her wig! Hee hee! But did they appreciate me? No! I was a 'dishonor', and a 'disgrace'! I actually think Mommy and Daddy Celebrations were happy when I left for Dream Valley with Twilight and the others, and I never even get so much as a letter from them or my sister! Though I'm really not shocked with my sis not writing, she's probably still mad at me for smashing the doll she made for the Hoofkaido's Himatsuri festival. Okay, I know she spent weeks carefully painting the little mare, putting the wig and dress on it, and putting in and coloring the mane. But it was so funny when that anvil came down on it, and she got that shocked look on her face. All of the other fillies with dolls burst out laughing, so why did Sweet Celebrations start crying? The ponies here at Dream Castle haven't been much better, though. Baby Cuddles just cries and hides whenever I hit her with my shock buzzer, and Gusty chased me for two hours after I put that whoopee cushion under her chair. Gingerbread and Sweet Stuff didn't giggle when I put too much yeast into the cookies they were baking and made them explode in the oven, and Bow Tie didn't chortle when I dyed all of her ribbons plaid. And the worst out of this bunch has to be Shady. I don't think I've ever seen that mare crack a smile, or laugh, or do anything but mope and whine! She resisted every attempt to make her laugh, even the time I put a stink bomb in her toilet! I swear, I think that pony actually enjoys being sad! Why won't these ponies laugh at my jokes? Humor is my special talent, and I want other ponies to see how much of a pathetic cosmic prank this life really is! Oh, there are a few ponies who actually get the joke. Queen Majesty made me her royal court jester, and loves my 'antics' cause I make her laugh after all the serious queeny stuff she has to do all the time. Fizzy gets the joke, and always laughs at my gags. Why, she’ even helped me pull some my best tricks! And there's also Danny, Megan's brother. The two of us are real stinkers, and his sisters always getting mad at him for pulling pranks and stuff. He and Fizzy are the only ones that understand me, and they have become my best friends. The three of us do kinda feel out of place around here, though. One time, Paradise had stayed up late, watching a movie Megan had brought from the other world about aliens and space stuff. Sooo Fizzy, Danny and I disguised ourselves as Martians, and 'landed' in our ship outside her bedroom window. Oh boy, did she scream when we threatened to take her brain out! That Pegasus was so scare she couldn't sleep for a week! But instead of laughing, Megan and the other mares just yelled at us, and told us not to scare ponies like that ever again. I just don't see it, what did we do that was so wrong? Well, time to stop philosophizing, and kick these doggies in the booty. But I wish my friends could stop getting mad all the time, and just join me in the fun. I don't understand why the other ponies have to be so boring and serious all the time, can't they see that, just like one of Sweet Stuff's burritos, life's nothing but a gas? Why can't other ponies just get the joke, and giggle right along with us? Why does everybody have to be so freakin sensitive? What the hay is the matter with all of you? Why can't you just laugh?