"Once upon a time in the magical land of Equest...."
"NO! Pretty Pony no storyspeak! Storygoblin job! So Storygoblin storyspeak!"
"...Fine!" Pretty Pony Narrator storms off.
*Cough, cough, HACK, WHEEZE, Phlem, Spit*
A smooth and deep voice starts to narrate.
"In a time forgotten by all but the eldest of the races a war raged over the territories of the surface and sky. What only a handful of races knew was the war also raged for territory below ground as well. The Goblin race, consisting of goblins, orcs, and trolls fought with Diamond Dogs, Changelings, and Thestrals (or Bat Ponies). When the surface world started to freeze and the ponies of the surface decided to find a new home, the goblin race decided to follow. Weary of the fighting in the home country and wishing to find peace. So it was to be that when Equestria was established above so too was a goblin kingdom below. When refugees from the other underworld races made their way into goblin lands they were not shunned instead deals were made to broker peace. The Goblins deciding if it worked for the," *Ahem*," 'Pretty Ponies' then it should work for them. So it came to be that the Goblins took their kingdom and solidified it in the mountains. Diamond Dogs received the valley floor where jewels most commonly were found and the Thestrals were allowed the swamps and marshes of the land where fruits were abundant but other ponies feared to tread. The changelings were at first welcome but after many betrayals and attempted coups, they were shunned by the other three races and banished from the underworld and surface alike. And so it came to pass that Equestria found it self with two separate kingdoms. One above and another below. And this is where are story truly begins."