//------------------------------// // Diplomatic Usage // Story: My Little Teelo: Masquerade // by Ardwolf //------------------------------// In which a princess retires, authority is cynically manipulated, and diplomacy is exercised with extreme prejudice. Celestia reappeared just behind her chair, not a single hair of her mane mussed by the quick trip. “Where is Princess Sparkle?” Søyle asked curiously. “I sent her with Lady Teelo to provide additional protection.” Celestia said with a smile. Søyle nodded. “You had no difficulties then?” The troll asked. “None, happily,” the Princess replied. “When it’s time to open the Bridge again I will arrange to be alone for a few minutes. I apologize for the delay in your return to Hejm, but I fear Lady Teelo had no choice in the matter. I will provide you the fastest train available to minimize your travel time. If it were in my power I would provide chariots, but alas Equestria does not have that many large ones, especially considering the three we lost to Chrysalis yesterday.” “As always, you are a kind-hearted hostess. My thanks, Princess of Ponies,” Søyle bowed her head. “Now I must return to the others and explain what has happened. I fear Skrent and Flint will feel ill-used over this.” “Such is a guard’s lot in life,” Celestia answered ruefully. “My own guards take an equally dim view whenever I manage to slip my leash. So give them my regards and thank you for giving your Queen the same license I indulge occasionally.” Søyle rose then left silently, collecting the troll brothers along the way with a terse exchange in Trollish that Celestia could hear even through the screening bushes. She rose to return to her own duties, still smiling from the prank she had played on both her guards and the nobles of Canterlot. If only they knew just how big a prank it truly was, she thought as her bodyguards fell into position behind her, and how it will shape the future of us all. ooOoo Earth, Sunday morning, May 29, 2013 09:12 AM “What are you doing here, Twilight?” Teagan squawked in shock. “You shouldn’t be here! You’re a Princess for God’s sake! They’re going to notice you’re gone!” “Calm down,” Twilight said, still smiling. “Celestia suggested it might be useful for me to see this side of the Bridge and collect a few readings from this world. It was too good an opportunity to pass up. I thought she told you?” “No,” Teelo said in a daze. “She didn’t. It’s becoming a habit.” “If you’re here,” Emma spoke up, “then who’s going to tell Celestia when to open the Bridge?” Twilight chuckled. “I haven’t been idle these last few months, you know. I knew if the Tairseach Urlabhra spell worked then theoretically,” Her horn lit up and a small amethyst gem floated out of her mane, held in place by a slender golden chain, “then so would this. I created it just in case.” “A—necklace?” Teagan asked, confused. “Is it supposed to be inside your mane like that?” “It’s not a necklace it’s a keep-me-safe,” Twilight corrected her. “Keep-me-safes are amulets you hide in your mane until you need them. The chain is just to keep it from falling out. Like the Bridge of Days, keep-me-safes have been forgotten by most ponies. Unicorns were the only ponies that could ever use them anyway.” “What does it do?” Teagan asked, walking forward to look at it. Up close it looked like one half of a coin, made from carved amethyst. It was broken in the middle, leaving a zigzag edge. “You remember the compasses we used to find Tišina?” Twilight asked. The red-haired girl nodded. “Those used the Law of Contagion to connect the blood on the compass needle with Tišina, since it was once part of her.” “So I’m guessing the other half of this amulet is back in Equestria?” Teagan asked, peering at it. “Right! I gave it to Princess Celestia, who’s wearing it in her mane just like I am. So now, all I have to do is cast a simple ventriloquism spell on the amulet, like so,” Her horn flared for a moment and the gem began to glow, “and now when I speak my voice should come out of the other amulet, just like it did in the lab! Princess Celestia, can you hear me?” “I can,” Celestia’s voice came from the amulet. “Congratulations on yet another clever magical discovery, Twilight! I have to go now, I’m about to speak with Lady Silkwind. Don’t contact me again because others might hear you. I’ll contact you when I’m alone.” The gem’s glow faded. “Magical walkie-talkies,” Emma said, laughing. “How cool is that?” “That would have been really handy to have on the glacier,” Teagan noted. “How come we didn’t?” “Um, because I only thought of it afterward?” Twilight suggested sarcastically. “I mean the individual spells involved are quite simple, but nobody ever thought to put them together like this before.” “Are you telling me nobody ever said, hey, wouldn’t it be useful if I could talk to somebody far away? Doesn’t that seem, you know, world-shatteringly useful?” Teagan asked incredulously. “Um—no?” Twilight responded uncertainly. Teagan face-palmed. “Are you serious? Twilight, think about it! You just spoke to Princess Celestia in another dimension! Just being able to call for help if you need to is absolutely huge.” “I guess you’re right. Still, it’s pretty limited.” Twilight said after a moment’s thought. “Limited how?” Teagan asked warily. “Well, for starters only unicorns or alicorns can use it,” Twilight said, “and they can only talk to whoever has the other half of the amulet. And if the other pony wants to talk back then they have to be able to cast a ventriloquism spell too.” “Yeah, that’s a pretty big limitation,” Teagan admitted. “Still, knowing we can call for help if we need to is comforting. I just wish the darn Bridge wasn’t located in the Everfree. Tramping to and from it all the time is a real pain. Especially now that we can’t really use it freely.” She sighed. “Oh well, at least this end is firmly planted in my house.” Twilight gave her a strange look. “Um, it’s not, you know.” Twilight said slowly. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you?” “Tell me what? You guys really need to brush up on your communication skills.” Teagan felt her heart skip a beat. “So what is it now?” “That’s not what I meant.” Twilight said as her eyes brightened in Lecture Mode. “Uh-oh, you’ve done it now,” Emma murmured. “It’s true the Equestrian end of the Bridge Of Days is anchored to that clearing in the Everfree,” Twilight began. “One of the reasons the Capaill and the O’Gara couldn’t cross the Bridge themselves was because when it was first created it was very unstable, there wasn’t enough magic to allow the Bridge to carry sentient creatures. Spirits could cross, or animals, but not fully sentient creatures. The Bridge wasn’t stable enough to support the magical load until hundreds of ponies had crossed over and then the Bridge was left to solidify the anchorage for a few hundred years.” “Wait, you’re saying the Bridge can be opened from this side now?” Teagan asked eagerly, “Since it’s anchored in Equestria?” “It would take a very capable caster,” Twilight said, “but yes, it could be done.” “Wait a minute. The original ponies were Shetland ponies, right?” Emma asked in puzzlement. “Weren’t the O’Gara clan and the Capaill in Ireland? So wouldn’t that mean the Bridge should be wherever those ponies came from? What’s it doing in Teelo’s living room?” “That’s just it,” Twilight said happily. “On this side the Bridge isn’t anchored to a place, it’s anchored to a person. The firstborn child of the eldest O’Gara bloodline, descended from Dagda’s firstborn son’s firstborn son, who at the time was only a newborn. The anchorage moves to a new host the first time the current anchor has a child.” “So, if I have children…” Teelo said slowly. Twilight nodded. “Yes, your firstborn will become the anchor—as long as they’re born in your world. If they were born in Equestria they’d still be the anchor but the Bridge would no longer connect to your world, it would connect two points in Equestria.” “Yikes!” Teagan paled. “So what happens if I die before having any children?” Twilight considered that. “I don’t know. It might move to the next eldest descendant. Of course you don’t have any siblings. That means…” Twilight’s eyes widened. “Yes?” Teagan prompted her, not liking the look on Twilight’s face. “The Bridge would vanish forever.” Twilight whispered. ooOoo “Søyle, where is the Dronning?” Skrent growled as they fell in behind her. “Caverns have echoes,” Søyle said shortly. Skrent nodded and remained silent until they passed the guardian unicorns at the door of the Ghrian Suite. Once inside Søyle told the brothers to go to the conference room and wait for her. Silently they did so. The troll woman then sought out Alene Hule, who she found in his room reading a large book of obviously pony manufacture. “Cavern Walker, I have a need to speak with you. Is this time suitable?” Søyle asked in Trollish. The Alene set aside his open book and gave Søyle his full attention. “How may I help you, Kona Søyle?” “Come with me to the meeting hall,” she said. She turned and left, knowing the Alene would follow in his own time. She barely had time to settle onto her seat before the small trollish wizard strode sedately into the room and shut the door behind him. Skrent and Flint were already seated at the table. “What has happened?” The Alene asked calmly as he took a stool. “The Dronning has returned to her world. There was a threat to her parents from something she called the Sedeef. I did not understand what this was. She claimed that the Sedeef was an ally, yet it still threatened her parents because it acted from ignorance, yet she also said this ignorance was needful. She said it was a human thing, and that it was hard to explain to me.” “She left us behind when facing this Sedeef?” Skrent said in what for a troll was a plaintive voice. “Why did she go into danger without taking us?” “Because she could not,” Søyle said firmly. “She traveled by magic, aided by the eldest Princess Of Ponies and the youngest one. Emma went with her. The Dronning, Emma, and the youngest Princess of Ponies are now in the Dronning’s world.” “No doubt she must hide her intentions from her enemies,” Alene Hule said slowly. “Some answers are not to be had at the end of a club, Skrent. You have been with the Kongen long enough to know this is true.” “It does not mean it fits me well, Walker.” Skrent growled. “Still, I do not understand why the Dronning would allow a Princess of Ponies to go to her world. That is not something that could be kept from notice.” Alene Hule mused. “There is further news. The Dronning has been called to Hejm with all possible speed. The Deepest Dark is stirring and Mountain Heart is needed.” The two troll brothers instantly bared their fangs and snarled. The Alene raised his head but did not otherwise react. “This is most troubling,” The wizard said flatly. “If the Deepest Dark is indeed rising they will need every Alene to look to Hejm’s wards. I must return at once.” “The Dronning has sworn to return in two days time, and the eldest Princess of Ponies has said she will provide her fastest train to speed our journey,” Søyle said. “She is sending a bird-horse to Hejm to inform Fjell of the delay.” “Are we sure Celestia’s word is good in this?” The Alene asked stoically. “I was there when the spell was cast that let us speak to her parents, Walker.” Søyle said. “The Dronning acted of her own will in this. She swore to return in two days time. The threat was real. The ponies may be tricky, but Celestia has never foresworn herself. I believe her.” “With the Dronning returned to her own world there is nothing we can do,” the Alene noted fatalistically. “But I say this. Among the many things you must teach her the first should be calling on her clan’s aid in times of need.” “I hear your words, Cavern Walker,” Søyle nodded solemnly. “I have been striving to do so already. I do not understand why the Dronning tries to do everything herself. It makes little sense, but I testify by my blood she is in truth the Dronning. Alas, I fear she is also Fate Born.” “So it would seem, Kona Søyle,” the old wizard agreed heavily. “So it would seem.” ooOoo Earth, Sunday morning, May 29, 2013 09:18 AM “So that’s something else I have to be careful of,” Teagan groaned. “This is not what I signed up for! Now the whole Bridge depends on me not dying? If that’s true how the hell has it survived for over a thousand years?” “By none of the anchors dying before having children?” Twilight suggested with a smile. “Not helping, Twilight. Oh, jeez! My parents! They’re in the back yard and they’ll kill me if I don’t let them know we’re back. Emma! Close the blinds. The last thing we want is somebody seeing Twilight. Twilight, stay here, I’ll be right back.” Teagan dashed out of the room to the kitchen. She opened the back door and spotted her parents sitting with the Halsteads. Taking a deep breath she stepped out the back door. She was almost to the table before her father looked up and saw her. “Pumpkin!” he almost shouted. “You’re back! Is Emma with you?” “Yeah, but all of you need to come in the house right now,” Teagan said with quiet intensity. “Don’t ask any questions, just get up and follow me. It’s important.” Picking up her keepsake she closed the box and wrapped it, even as she turned and started walking toward the house. Fortunately the adults actually listened to her and followed her inside. She closed the door and motioned them to follow her. “Teagan, what’s going on?” Elaine asked worriedly. “We have a guest, Mom,” Teagan replied. “Come meet her.” “Her? Who—Twilight?” Elaine exclaimed in shock. “Hello, Lord and Lady O’Gara, Mr. and Mrs. Halstead,” the alicorn replied with a big smile. “How are you?” “Emma!” Olivia grabbed her daughter in a fierce hug, which was returned just as fiercely. “It’s good to be back,” the brown-haired girl replied, “even if it is only for a couple of days.” Teagan winced, half-relieved and half-horrified at Emma’s approach. If she kept this up there was no way she was going back… “What do you mean a couple of days?” Olivia let go of her daughter and glared at her. “You’re grounded. You’re not going anywhere!” “You know, I actually wish that were true,” Emma said sadly. “I really wouldn’t mind, because that would be normal. Two days ago my life stopped being normal, Mom. It will never be normal again.” “What are you talking about? You’re home, Emma!” Olivia said uneasily. “Your little adventure is over. You’re safe now. We can just forget this whole thing ever happened.” “Maybe you can,” she replied, shrugging. “You weren’t the one standing under an alien sky and watching the stars dance to a goddess’s whim. You never spent half an hour having a heart-to-heart with the goddess who raises the sun every morning as we flew through the air in her chariot. You never asked her for advice and had her tell you it was time for you to decide for yourself.” “Emma, what’s gotten into you?” Olivia snapped. “I don’t know,” Emma said. “But I’m not the same person I was two days ago, I know that. And I can’t stay here. I’m sorry.” “Young lady you are staying here!” Jacob bristled, glaring at his daughter. “You’re grounded for a damn month, you hear me?” “I wish I could stay,” Emma said softly. “Daddy, I want to stay. But I can’t.” “Do you know what this is about?” He glared at Twilight. “Have you been putting dangerous ideas in my daughter’s head?” “Hey, don’t look at me! I said she should stay here,” Twilight protested, raising a hoof in a gesture a horse could never have performed. “But the Princess did tell her it was her choice. Søyle outright asked her to stay. Blame them.” “Who is Søyle?” John asked, trying to calm the tempest of emotion from Emma’s parents. “She’s the Troll King’s wife,” Twilight replied. “She’s acting as Teelo’s lady-in-waiting and tutor on troll customs. She’s become Emma’s bodyguard as well.” “Wait, bodyguard?” Olivia blurted. “Why did Emma need a bodyguard? Why would a king’s wife do that anyway? And if the king has a wife, how is Teelo the queen?” Emma shot Twilight a hard look. “Well, it’s complicated,” Twilight said carefully, “Trolls are all about clan you see. Since she bonded with Crush Teelo is the queen of the trolls by troll law. In fact, the trolls consider her to be a troll, not a human. Now trolls believe there are two ways for you to be part of a clan. The first is by birth or marriage, just like humans and ponies. But they have a second kind of clan, called a clan of purpose. If you’re clan of purpose, you’re also clan to everyone anypony the clan of purpose is clan to, just as if you were clan by birth.” “Being the troll queen she’s actually considered part of the king’s clan too. However, the queen also has a clan of purpose, to help cement relationships between troll clans. Right now, Søyle is part of Teelo’s clan of purpose, along with about thirty other trolls from other troll clans.” “When Teelo claimed Emma was part of her own clan of purpose and her best friend it meant Emma was part of the queen’s clan—because trolls take such things really seriously. As such, Emma is clan with Søyle, and when Subtle Dancer was attacked Teelo asked Søyle to keep Emma safe while she and the guards dealt with the changelings.” “Trolls treat clan members the same way humans treat immediate family,” Teagan jumped into the explanation. “The trolls in my clan all think of Emma as family. She’s really hit it off with them too. They all like her a lot. If you’re part of a troll clan, you’re family. Which means Clan O’Gara is part of my troll clan too, and so are the Halsteads.” “Wait, we’re part of a troll clan?” Olivia asked, momentarily startled into civility. “Yes,” Teagan said nodding. “I know it’s pretty hard to get your head around, but when it comes to clan, it is scary how seriously the trolls take family—and Emma is family to my clan. Søyle is as serious about protecting Emma as you are—or I am.” “If what you say is true you don’t want her there any more than we do,” Jacob said soberly. “It’s dangerous there! This Subtle Dancer guy, he got hurt by monsters, right?” “Yes,” Teagan said neutrally. “To be honest I’m really torn. I want to keep Emma safe, but at the same time she’s already proven how useful she can be. But I promised Emma I wouldn’t try to persuade you to make her stay here. Even Princess Celestia seems to think she should make the choice herself.” “Is Equestria dangerous?” Olivia demanded, looking between Twilight and Teagan. “Some parts are,” Twilight said after a moment when it was obvious Teagan wasn’t going to speak, “and some parts are safe. Canterlot is pretty safe. Ponyville is pretty safe as long as you stay out of the Everfree. I don’t know much about Hejm, but I do know trolls are very law-abiding.” “There are lots of monsters though?” Olivia pressed. “Yes, there are,” Teagan took over the conversation. “Small ones and big ones, ones that have magical powers and others that are as smart as people and aren’t picky about who they eat.” “We have our monsters too, Daddy.” Emma said quietly. “Rapists, serial killers, drug gangs, copperheads, cottonmouths, rattlesnakes. That’s just here in Kansas. If we were talking about Australia instead of Equestria would you be as worried? Knowing I’d be with trustworthy people who knew the land and how to avoid the dangers?” “Yes, I would!” Jacob exclaimed. “You’re talking about the whole summer, Emma! Think about how we’d feel, worried about you off on another world, and not able to talk to you! Not even by letter! Not knowing if something had happened!” “I’m not an idiot, Daddy,” Emma said calmly. “Yeah, the thing with Subtle Dancer was scary. But I had three trolls guarding me. Imagine an eight-foot tall wall of muscle, armed with a club seven feet long, with claws that can dig through stone. Three of those were guarding just me. That doesn’t count the twenty pegasi guards or little Miss Super-Hero over there with her magical club. They were between us and the changelings the whole time. Oh, and Sun Hammer was with us too!” “Who in Hell is Sun Hammer?” Jacob nearly shouted in exasperation. “Jeez, I need a damn scorecard to keep track of all this!” “He’s a friend of Teagan’s,” John said, “An earth pony that weighs about a thousand pounds and stands around five feet at the shoulder. He’s a soldier.” “Ex-Royal Guard, actually,” Twilight, ever the pedant, spoke up. “He’s currently Keeper of the Armory, Hero of the Crown and Champion of the Sun. He’s also one very scary pony when he gets angry.” Twilight shivered, remembering how Sun Hammer had challenged Princess Luna herself, rearing and slashing at her with razor-edged hooves. “That doesn’t explain why you have to go back.” Olivia said pointedly. “What can you do that Teelo can’t? She apparently knows how to fight. You don’t.” “I don’t need to know how to fight,” Emma said quietly, “That’s Teelo’s job.” Teagan was beginning to worry about just how calm Emma was being. It wasn’t like her friend at all. She wondered if the last two days had had a bigger impact on Emma than the brown-haired girl had let the world see. “So why is it so important for you to go?” Jacob asked angrily. “Did you ever wonder what it would be like to be the only human being in the entire world, Daddy?” Emma asked, meeting her father’s gaze with tranquil eyes. “I got a taste of what that must be like over the last couple of days. But Teelo, she knows. She has been the only human being in Equestria. Not knowing if she’d ever be able to go home again. Knowing if she couldn’t she’d never see another human face ever again. Can you imagine what that must have been like? “As nice as ponies are, they’re not human, Daddy. Trolls are nice too—well, to clan at least, but they’re even stranger than ponies. She’s going back to live with the trolls for three whole months. Immersing herself in all things troll, she said. She’ll speak troll, eat troll food, be surrounded by trolls everywhere she goes. Oh, sure, there are a few ponies in Hejm’s Equestrian Embassy but she isn’t going to be seeing them very much.” “So if I don’t go back she won’t see another human face for months, Daddy. Think about that. She won’t have anyone who understands her or knows what it’s like to be a human among trolls. She’ll have nobody to eat dinner with who doesn’t tower over her. No one to confide her fears to, except Søyle. Sure, Søyle is a wonderful person, but she’s still a troll. How could she understand human fears, human wants and needs?” “Who else can gather gossip that a human being would think important? I’ve already made a lot of contacts in our clan among the nobles. And the guards. And the wagon drivers. Oh, and let’s not forget my contacts among the ponies. Nobody’s afraid to talk to me. I’m not the Queen. I’m just a friendly smile and a willing ear, always ready to lend a hand and have a little chat while I do.” Twilight’s eyebrows were almost hiding in her mane. “Emma?” She asked uncertainly, “are you saying you’re a spy?” “Of course not,” Emma said, smiling happily at Twilight. “I’m just a friendly girl, Twilight. I like people, that’s all. Oh, and I’m also Teelo’s best friend. So if I hear something that she needs to know I’ll be sure she does.” She winked at the alicorn, who sat down rather heavily, clearly stunned. “That, Daddy, is why I have to go back. To let Teelo keep her humanity and still be the Troll Queen.” Both of Emma’s parents were watching their daughter uncertainly. They were used to obedience, and the occasional tantrum, even a bit of drama now and again. They knew how to handle all of that. But this new calmness had clearly unnerved them. “If it helps, think of it like me being an exchange student.” Emma said. “Hosted by a foreign family. Because that’s exactly what this is.” “In another world,” Olivia said snidely. “That isn’t exactly like going to Europe, now is it? At least in Europe you could call home every night. Not only can’t you call home, you can’t even send any letters! What happens if you get sick or hurt? Do trolls or ponies have hospitals that can treat you?” “Equestrian medicine is very advanced, Mrs. Halstead,” Twilight said, stung at the implied slight. “While our doctors have never had to treat a human before, we are familiar with many different sentient species and magic is quite versatile.” “I know they can regenerate changeling limbs and eyes,” Teagan said reluctantly, still not entirely sure she should be helping Emma’s cause, “despite never having treated changelings before. They can cause bones to heal at three times the normal rate. They have vaccines and can treat infectious diseases. In a lot of ways their medical treatments are more advanced than ours.” “But she’d be in a troll city, not a pony one. How’s their medical knowledge?” Jacob asked shrewdly. “From what I understand,” Twilight replied, “trolls heal much faster than other creatures so their trauma skills tend to inferior to pony ones, but their knowledge of diseases is just as good, and we actually trade for some of their drugs. In the worst case there’s always a chariot stationed in Hejm, so it’s only three hours to Canterlot. In a real emergency I could fly to Hejm and teleport back.” “Aren’t you a princess now?” John asked, surprised. “Why would a princess make an ambulance run?” “I did say in a real emergency, you know.” Twilight said with a smile. “Besides, Teelo is a really good friend, and Emma’s becoming one. I always help my friends.” “If you were a real friend you’d be telling her to stay home,” Jacob said grumpily. “Now we’re the bad guys for trying to keep her safe. You are not going back, Emma. Full stop.” “Excuse me, Mr. Halstead?” Twilight said diffidently, “Without meaning to challenge your parental authority, and acknowledging I think she should stay here myself I’m forced to bring your attention to a couple of points you may not be aware of.” “Oh?” he asked warily. “Do you think they’ll change my mind?” “I don’t know,” Twilight said, shaking her head, “but as a Princess of Equestria I feel it is my duty to present them. If I don’t, you won’t have all the information available to make an informed decision.” “In other words, you have to present it?” Jacob asked. “You don't have a choice?” “Yes,” Twilight admitted rather reluctantly. “Well, I don’t want to be unreasonable, but it probably won’t change my mind,” he warned her. “Understood, and thank you. First, Princess Celestia felt it should be Emma’s decision to make, no one else’s. I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but the Princess has ruled Equestria for over a thousand years. Equestria has flourished under her rule and her wisdom is legendary in our world. I’m not saying she never makes mistakes, but she’s very good at judging character. She was my mentor growing up so I trust her. If she felt Emma should choose, then I urge you to consider her experience in such matters.” Jacob looked mulish, but his wife suddenly seemed uncertain. “And second?” Jacob asked, clearly not convinced. “I feel compelled to ask what dangers you believe Emma could be exposed to in a city of trolls?” Twilight asked with a smile. “Trolls are extremely law-abiding, much more so than humans, or so Matt tells me.” “Your Highness,” Jacob said in a level tone, “the entire problem is I don’t know all the ways my daughter could get killed in Hejm. Wild animals, maybe? Invaders? Criminals? Rebellion? Some crazy magic plague? Bloodthirsty beach balls? How the hell would I know what the dangers are in your world? I only learned it existed yesterday. At least here I know what the dangers are and how to avoid them.” “So you won’t honor her choice?” Twilight asked regretfully. “No,” Jacob snorted, “because she’s made a stupid choice. It’s a parent’s responsibility to protect their children from themselves.” “A stupid choice?” Emma asked, tilting her head. “Because you think I don’t know the dangers involved? Because you think I’m too young to make a rational decision? Because you think those I’m with are equally clueless?” Her words were delivered in that same strange calm tone. “Yes!” Her father snapped. “This,” Emma said pointing to the lavender alicorn, “is Twilight Sparkle. She’s immortal, Daddy. She’s saved their world more often than Teelo has. She earned those wings. She used to be a unicorn, but through her own efforts became an alicorn. Does that sound like a stupid clueless idiot to you? “Princess Celestia is over a thousand years old, and she rules a country of ponies. Kind, non-aggressive, and really innocent ponies in a world filled with big predators. Is she stupid and clueless? Because she said I’m capable of making this choice. “Kongen Fjell rules a kingdom of trolls, Daddy. Big, dangerous, aggressive trolls. Except they haven’t fought amongst themselves in thousands of years. Can any human civilization say that? And now I, no we, are part of Teelo’s troll clan, which means the trolls won’t hurt me. They’ll protect me. All of them. Eight foot walls of muscle, teeth, and claws. Is Kongen Fjell stupid, Daddy? “Søyle swore to protect me against changelings, monsters, and even gods if it came to that. Teagan’s own bodyguards laughed when Teagan asked if Søyle could fight, and said she was a match for the king himself. Trolls never break their promises, Daddy. Ever. To them breaking a promise is one of the worst crimes they can commit. She told me I should stay. Is Søyle stupid and clueless? “Then there’s Teelo. She knows the dangers of that world better than anybody here except Twilight. She’s faced them and beaten them. She’s my best friend, and she really, really wants to keep me safe. But even she admits I proved I can help. She doesn’t want me to go, but she’s agreed it’s my choice, and she promised to stay out of it. Is she stupid and clueless? “After that changeling hurt Subtle Dancer I helped save his life, Daddy. Cloud Maker and Teelo told me what to do and I did it. His blood was all over my hands, so don’t tell me I don’t know how dangerous it can be there. I saw what happened to him with my own eyes, I saw that monster knock him down and try to slash his throat with its fangs. But Subtle Dancer is still alive because everyone, including me, worked together to save his life. When they needed me I didn’t scream and run away. Do you really think I’m stupid and don’t know the risks? “I didn’t say you were stupid,” Jacob said, forced on the defensive. “No, only that I make stupid choices.” Emma said quietly. “Ask Subtle Dancer how stupid my choices are.” “I can’t, can I?” Jacob rallied. “He’s not here, is he? He’s in this crazy other world, where he belongs. Yet he still nearly got himself killed! How did that happen, huh? She says the changelings were looking for payback. What happened to them, anyway? I haven’t heard a detailed account of that fight, and if you expect me to let you go back there that’s the least of what I’m going to want to know!” “Most of the changelings are dead, Mr. Halstead,” Teagan said quietly, hating how careful she was having to be. On the one hand she’d promised not to screw up Emma’s chances of convincing her parents, but on the other she was the troll queen, and couldn’t lie. “A few were badly injured instead of killed. They got captured and sent to the hospital under guard. The survivors fled.” “I see. And you fought these changelings, Teelo?” Jacob said, taken aback. “Yes,” Teagan said, dreading his next question. “Did you kill any of them?” “Yes,” Teagan said softly. “Some of them were fanatics who wouldn’t stop fighting. I had no choice.” “Wait, these weren’t just monsters? They were people?” Olivia asked, shocked. “No,” Twilight spoke up. Teagan turned to her in surprise. “The changelings Teelo killed were different. Normal changelings are sentient creatures. But the ones that Teelo fought were specially bred drones that were almost mindless. Their queen traded their sentience for huge size and combat ability. They were no more than animals.” Teagan sagged, a huge surge of relief washing through her. “Twilight, are you sure of that?” John asked with quiet intensity. “I’m sure,” Twilight nodded. “Wing Commander Stormwind’s report was very detailed. Most of the changelings killed were sentient, but not the ones inside the ring.” Teagan closed her eyes and blew out her breath, feeling a ton of guilt flow out of her. She wasn’t completely innocent—Jern’s blood was still on her hands, but at least the three guards were off her conscience. “Make sure Sun Hammer knows that, would you Twi?” Teagan asked softly. “Of course,” Twilight nodded, face serious. “Mr. Halstead, what else do you want to know?” Emma’s father seemed at a loss for words, staring at Teagan with wide eyes. Olivia’s mother took over. “How common are such incidents?” She asked sharply. “Not very,” Twilight answered quickly. “The reason this one happened is Subtle Dancer is the head of a government agency called Celestia’s Horn.” “They’re sort of the pony version of NCIS,” Teagan added. “Magical investigators crossed with the Secret Service.” “This incident had its roots in Subtle Dancer’s official activities,” Twilight continued. “It was a unique confluence of circumstances that can’t happen again.” “So you’re saying it was just a freak occurrence?” Jacob asked sourly. “How many times have you had to save the world from freak occurrences, Princess?” “Um, let me think,” Twilight said, tilting her head. “There was the incident with Nightmare Moon, and the first time Discord broke free. His second break out wasn’t nearly as bad, so I don’t count that. Oh, and the Nightmare Discord incident, although we were helping Teelo, really, so I can’t take full credit. I helped with Tišina, although Pinkie Pie was the one who really saved us that time. Of course Chrysalis attacking the Royal Wedding was about saving Equestria, not the whole world. And there was King Sombra, but that was just saving the Crystal Empire, not the whole world either. So—three times maybe? But I never did any of them all by myself,” she answered modestly. “Three times?” Jacob asked incredulously. “And you don’t even count saving countries? What is wrong with your world? That’s insane.” “Well,” Twilight admitted reluctantly, “it has been unusually busy the last few years. Honestly, if you don’t count the whole Sun Hammer incident there hasn’t been a real threat to the world in hundreds of years.” “Sun Hammer? Isn’t that Teelo’s friend?” Jacob asked. “What happened?” “Well, about eleven years ago Princess Celestia had to travel to the mountain under which Hejm lies. She was repairing the Veil, the magical boundary that separates Equestria from the Great Void. Because of complex issues involving troll politics that non-trolls still aren’t quite clear on, the old Troll King was forced to attack Princess Celestia’s expedition in order to drive it off. Since he wasn’t able to drive them off, it became a matter of honor for the Troll King to kill Princess Celestia. She was unable to defend herself, too busy repairing the Veil before the creature on the other side managed to break through. If she had stopped to fight the Troll King the creature would have broken through and maybe destroyed everything. Sun Hammer happened to be near enough to intervene. He attacked the Troll King, and killed him during a really nasty fight.” “The current king, Fjell, was the old Troll King’s son.” Teagan broke in. “It was a real mess all the way around and should never have happened. It left the ponies and the trolls on the edge of war for ten years. If Tišina hadn’t woken up things might still be messed up. Come to that, if Nightmare Discord hadn’t kidnapped me the war might actually have happened by now.” “You see? Teagan is the reason the war didn’t happen, she’s actually the reason for the growing alliance between ponies and trolls,” Emma spoke up. “This summer’s visit is really important, Daddy. She needs my help, if only to keep her cool while under all that pressure.” “Is that true?” Olivia asked, still not quite believing Teagan, of all people, was some kind of big wheel in another world. Teagan grimaced. “I hate to admit it, but Emma’s been a big help already. I can’t believe how easily she made friends with the trolls. They’re normally really insular and suspicious of other species. But she just smiled and chatted away and suddenly they’re all friendly and welcoming. I’m not saying that to change your minds either, because I promised to stay out of this.” “Would she be safe?” Jacob asked Teagan, who sighed. “I’m trying to be neutral here,” She complained. “I know I just said I wanted to stay out of this! But, if you really want to know what I think, then yeah, realistically she probably would be. The city of Hejm is a fortress, deep underground. Tens of thousands of trolls live there, and they aren’t barbarian savages either. They have an ancient civilization, wizards who can control earth magic, art, culture, the whole nine yards. I’ve been told the city is warded against all kinds of magical intrusion, and attackers would have to get to the city before they’d be a threat, the approaches are all heavily guarded. By trolls. Who do not find intruders the least bit amusing.” “So in the city itself, yeah, she’d probably be safe.” Teagan continued. “It’s getting to the city that might be a problem.” “What do you mean?” Olivia asked curiously. “Hejm is about a hundred and fifty miles from Canterlot as the crow flies. but on the ground it adds a lot of miles to the slog. We can take a train most of the way into the foothills, but the last fifty miles or so will be on foot. I don’t know if Emma’s got the stamina to walk fifty miles in mountains. Actually, I don’t know if I do either. But we’ll have wagons with us so if we exhaust ourselves we can ride part of the way. Not that that would do my image much good.” She chuckled ruefully. “I’m sure Celestia will provide a wing of the Royal Guard as escort, and we’ll have thirty trolls with us. Believe me when I say nothing in its right mind is going to want to mess with us! But accidents can happen.” She shrugged. “Poisonous snakes, maybe, or cockatrices, or who knows what. While an accident isn’t any more likely to happen to us there than it would to wilderness hikers here, it could happen.” “Having said that,” Teagan said forcefully, “I’m not going to sugar-coat this. We’ll be marching for a solid week through mountainous terrain, and living off the supplies we brought with us plus a little foraging. It’s going to be pretty rough on Emma.” “Do you really think my daughter can do all that?” Jacob asked. “A fifty mile mountain hike? I doubt I could do that.” Teagan paused, looking at a strangely calm Emma. It still made her nervous to see Emma like that. “I think so.” She said finally said, reluctantly. “She has no idea how hard it will be, but she’s not a weakling, and she’s not a coward. If I could learn to fight after spending a month as Matt’s punching bag then she can learn to deal with a fifty-mile hike. If she goes she really won’t have a choice.” “Wait, what?” Elaine exclaimed. “What do you mean you were Matt’s punching bag?” Teagan gave her mother a mirthless smile. “Remember how bad my temper used to be?” “Yes, but you said Matt taught you to control it.” Her mother said suspiciously. “He did,” Teagan nodded. “But the way he did it was to deliberately bait me until I lost my temper—and then keep knocking me down until I couldn’t stand up again. He did that every day for the entire first month. I wasn’t ready to learn to fight until I finally stopped losing my temper. By which time I knew exactly how much I sucked at fighting. He made sure of that.” “You never said anything, Teagan!” Her mother’s voice was horrified. “When you came home dragging every day I just thought you were exhausted. I didn’t know he was beating you! I’ll have that man arrested for what he’s done!” “No, Mom, you won’t,” Teagan said calmly. “I asked him to teach me to fight for real. Not just self-defense. Combat, because that’s what I needed. It saved my life yesterday, and last night.” “Last night?” John asked, staring at his daughter sharply. “Last night you were in Canterlot.” Teagan shook her head. “Yesterday afternoon I was in Canterlot—for all of an hour. Last night I was with Pinkie Pie and the Rolling Thunder platoon rescuing Sweetie Belle from a psycho cult in some god-forsaken swamp. Emma, on the other hand, was having dinner with Princess Celestia in Canterlot at the time,” She gave Emma a lopsided grin. “She tells me it was delicious.” “Why were you involved in a hostage rescue?” Elaine asked, appalled. “You said you wouldn’t go looking for trouble!” “I didn’t. It came looking for me, same as always. It’s a long involved story that I’m not going to go into right now. The Cliff Notes version is: bad guys defeated, Sweetie Belle saved, Teagan’s reward a serious night’s sleep. The End.” “And how, exactly, did Emma help you?” Jacob demanded. “She was having dinner while you were rescuing Sweetie Pie.” “Sweetie Belle. She helped later that night. I was having one of my nightmares,” Teagan said, looking at her mother, who closed her eyes, face tightening in pain. “I thought those had stopped,” John said, face creased in worry. “Yeah, so did I. Full blown color, stereoscopic sound and all the trimmings,” Teagan said grimly. “It was one of the really bad ones, the kind that leave me zombiefied the next day. Emma woke me up, raided the kitchen, and force-fed me a pound of chocolate. It was exactly what I needed too. I went back to sleep and slept like a baby till almost noon. A quick soak in a tub of hot water and I felt human enough to go to lunch with the Princesses. You can thank Emma for putting me back together. Without her I wouldn’t have been in any condition to have that zany idea that got us back here today.” She paused. “You know, I think I’ve been spending way too much quality time with Pinkie.” “You’re welcome,” Emma said. “You see? I know I’m just a sidekick to Teelo’s superhero but I’m a great sidekick. This is why she needs me with her in Hejm. Besides, I’ll be with relatives, Daddy. Relatives, I hasten to add, with big nasty clubs and a dim view of anything trying to hurt me.” Jacob hesitated. “Teelo’s mission is as important to Equestria as it is to the World Below, Mr. Halstead,” Twilight said carefully. “Emma is willing to help her friend. In Equestria, friendship is one of the most powerful things there is.” “Friendship is magic?” John asked with a cocked eyebrow. “Exactly!” Twilight nodded emphatically. “Can you promise us she’ll come back safe and sound?” Jacob demanded, staring hard at Teagan. “No,” Teagan said shaking her head. “Can you promise me you’ll come home from work tomorrow night safe and sound?” “Of course I can! What kind of question is that?” Jacob said angrily. “You can’t promise anyone that, Mr. Halstead. You could have a car accident, or get shot in a bank robbery, or a million other things. Granted, they aren’t likely, but they aren’t impossible, either. So I ask you again, can you promise me you’ll come home safe from work tomorrow?” “All right, we get the point, Teagan,” Olivia said before Jacob could explode again. “The question is will our daughter likely come home safe?” “Ha! Shoes on the other foot now, isn’t it?” Elaine pointed her finger at Teagan. “Didn’t I ask that very same question to Sun Hammer when he said they wanted you to help find Celestia?” “You did,” Teagan acknowledged with a smile. “But we’re not asking Emma to fight, quite the opposite. The risk is the same she’d take on a normal hike, if she was with a very experienced group of hikers. If she does twist an ankle or something, well, four pegasi can carry a stretcher, and remember at worst we’re only three hours by air from Canterlot.” “So, yes, Emma will likely be safe. The trip isn’t that dangerous, and once in Hejm she’ll be as safe as anyone inside a massive armed fortress can ever be.” “For somebody who said they wanted to be neutral you’re selling this awfully hard,” Jacob grumbled. “All right, let’s say the trip is reasonably safe. We still won’t be able to talk to her for the entire summer. David is going to wonder where his sister is, and why he didn’t get to go.” “Twilight, you have any ideas on that?” Teagan asked. “I know you can communicate with Celestia with that new gadget of yours across the Veil, and you can use your simulacrum to talk to the Halsteads, but is there anything you can think of to let them talk to Emma? Or write her? Or something?” “Not at the moment, but that sure sounds like an interesting project!” Twilight said enthusiastically. “Once I’m back in Equestria I’ll start researching it immediately! It would be important for pony/troll relations, too.” The alicorn was beaming around the table. “If we could talk to Teelo whenever we needed to, or have a way for Fjell to do it, it would ease troll fears about Teelo while she’s here in her world!” She turned to Jacob. “You see, Mr. Halstead? Emma is making wonderful contributions to the Equestria and her citizens even now!” “This is too weird,” Jacob stood up. “Come on Olivia. We’re taking Emma home.” “Will you let her choose?” Twilight asked carefully. He blew air out through his nose. “I’ll think about it,” he finally said. “But if I think it’s too dangerous she’s not going. And if you lie to us,” he glared at Emma, “or try to hold things back, we’re going to know it young lady. And then you’re going nowhere.” “Agreed,” she said in that same calm voice that was giving Teagan the creeps. “See you later, Teelo.” “Bye, Emma. Good luck.” Teagan said as her friend left with her parents. ooOoo Earth, Sunday afternoon, May 29, 2013 12:06 PM “So, I should probably get started with my readings,” Twilight said brightly, trying to break the awkward silence. “I’d like to take readings in the two places Teelo was when the Bridge opened, then other rooms of the house and finally some outdoor readings.” “Your Highness, while we’re certainly honored to have such a distinguished houseguest,” John said diplomatically, “there are definitely some things you should know.” “Lord O’Gara, please call me Twilight,” the alicorn said. “You knew me before I was a princess. I’m still not comfortable with all the titles and bowing and wearing a crown.” “I’ll make you a deal,” he said smiling. “I’ll call you Twilight if you call me John.” “Done!” Twilight said happily holding up a hoof. John shook it without hesitation. “Now what is it I should know?” “Well, for one thing very few people on Earth know that Equestria is real,” he said seriously. “If anyone else saw you it would raise awkward questions. If anyone heard you speak,” he shuddered, “you have no idea what kind of hell would descend on us. I’m sorry, but you won’t be able to leave the house during the day when someone might see you. If you absolutely have to get readings from the backyard it would probably be safe to do it after midnight, if you were careful. Anything else is far too dangerous, both to you and to us.” “Dangerous?” Twilight’s eyebrows rose. “Why?” “Because humans aren’t nice, Twilight,” Teagan explained. “When ponies see a human for the first time, they run, and maybe tell someone in authority. If a human saw you they’d either run or attack you. If they did run they’d call the police—or the army. And the army would capture you and at best you’d spend years being interrogated in some secret military base somewhere. At worst—well, they might shoot first and ask questions with a scalpel later. Since, you know, you probably wouldn’t be alive anymore.” Twilight’s jaw fell open. “What? That’s crazy! Why would they do that?” “Because humans can’t run very fast,” Teagan said grimly. “And most of us can’t fight. So we tend to hit things that scare us with the biggest rock we can find—and not bother seeing if it’s friendly first.” Twilight’s pupils contracted and she began to shiver. “As for us, well, we’d never see the light of day again,” Elaine said grimly. “The government would lock us away and ask endless questions—and they’d make sure we answered truthfully.” “What do you mean?” Twilight asked. “Drugs, torture, they wouldn’t scruple about three nobodies like us.” Elaine said, staring hard at the alicorn. “Elaine’s overstating the case,” John said as Twilight paled. “But we’d be arrested and isolated from the rest of the populace. After all, they can’t have us hobnobbing with aliens.” He chuckled grimly. “The government insists it has a monopoly on that sort of thing.” “Your government has dealings with other species?” Twilight asked, recovering somewhat. “I thought you said humans were the only intelligent species on Earth.” “We are. Dad’s talking about theoretical extraterrestrials, beings from another planet out in space,” Teagan replied. “Although I guess Equestrians would qualify as extra-terrestrials too, since you aren’t from this world.” “Humans are xenophobic?” Twilight asked, horrified. “Yep,” Teagan nodded. “Utterly and completely bug-nuts psychotic about it. Well, a lot of us are. The trolls would get killed before they could say anything, because they’re a walking billboard of everything that scares humans.” She gave Twilight the once-over. “Of course you are simply adorable. Once they got to know you the average human would probably rather cuddle with you rather than shoot you. But the military would never give anybody that chance. So it’s vital nobody see you, and absolutely imperative nobody find out you can talk.” “It wouldn’t be a problem,” John said, “if we didn’t have to call the social worker. She’s going to want to come here and see the house and then interview all three of us to make sure we aren’t abusing Teagan. If we’re very lucky we can get rid of her after that one interview. If we’re not lucky she’ll insist on weekly visits for who knows how long, and then we’d have to hire a lawyer to fight. And that would turn nasty very quickly.” “But there’s no way Teagan could come back here every week,” Twilight said reasonably. “Even with a chariot it’s nearly four hours between Hejm and the Bridge. Not to mention that only Princess Celestia or maybe Princess Luna can open the Bridge for the next three weeks.” “On top of which I can’t delay my trip to Hejm for three weeks,” Teagan grumbled. “Two days was pushing it. We should have already been in the foothills.” “Hoofhills,” Twilight said, grinning. Teagan rolled her eyes. “Hoofhills, then.” She waved a hand dismissively. “No way can I commute.” “So, if I understand you correctly,” Twilight said slowly, “you have to convince this social worker that everything’s normal. That doesn’t seem hard.” Teagan barked a laugh. “In case you haven’t noticed, Twilight, my life is about as normal as yours.” “Point taken,” the alicorn nodded. “Well, what about casting a suggestion spell on her?” John and Elaine stared at her, shocked. “What? It won’t hurt her. I just cast a spell and she’ll never remember seeing me. In fact, she’ll be convinced everything is fine and go away and not think about you anymore.” “That sounds risky,” Elaine said, looking away. “How do you know it will work on humans?” “It works on everything,” Twilight said confidently, “even animals, if you do it right.” “Yeah, but a spell like that,” Elaine shook her head, “will mess with her mind. Make any mistakes and it could leave her a mental vegetable—or kill her. And if that happened we’d be done for.” “I know what I’m doing,” Twilight said. “The chance of something going wrong is vanishingly small.” “But not zero,” John noted. “Let’s hold that option in reserve, all right? If we can persuade her we aren’t neglecting Teagan she’ll apologize for bothering us and go away. That’s the preferred outcome.” “All right, if you say so,” Twilight said agreeably. “So when is this social worker coming over?” “As soon as we find a good hiding spot for you,” John said, smiling. ooOoo “Thank you for seeing me, Your Highness,” the griffiness said, bowing low and sweeping her wings forward in a graceful and understated flourish. “May the sky bear you forevermore.” “Lady Silkwind, always a pleasure. May the winds lift you upward.” Celestia nodded to her guest. “It’s been too long since we last spoke.” “Good company is swift to part, alas,” the golden furred catbird said quietly. “I would hope our time together might be spent to the greater good of us all.” “Oh? That’s always to be hoped. Would you care for some tea?” Celestia offered, lifting the teapot with her magic. “If I recall correctly you prefer a dollop of honey in it, do you not?” “Yes. I am honored you remember, Your Highness.” The griffiness took her tea and let the steam waft to her beak. “Ah, wonderful! Canterlot White, such an exquisite bouquet.” “You’re so fond of it,” Celestia said with a smile. “I like to make my guests comfortable.” “Quite thoughtful, Your Highness.” The catbird sipped her tea and closed her eyes in pleasure. “Perfect, as always. I am somewhat surprised by your choice of a tea party to discuss matters. Although, far be it for me to disagree, the tea is delicious.” “The teacakes are quite good as well,” Celestia said, nodding to the dish of golden disks. “Dried sultanas and cinnamon.” “Ah, thank you. I’m very fond of cinnamon,” Lady Silkwind delicately picked one up and neatly snipped off a corner with her beak, letting it roll over her tongue with beak firmly shut as griffin etiquette demanded. Due to their unique physiology griffins could actually wrap their tongues around a morsel in their beak, giving them a far superior sense of taste. “I was actually inspired by something Lady Emma said to Lady Teagan,” Celestia said with a chuckle. “Apparently there is some contact between their world and Equestria, probably in the form of dreams, which inspired a series of plays about Princess Sparkle and her friends.” “Really?” The griffiness blinked. “That’s very odd, don’t you think?” “Very odd indeed,” Celestia said with a laugh. “Apparently these plays are extremely popular on Lady Teagan’s world. I’m told the plays are aimed at human fillies, but they have garnered a following among adults as well. The aficionados call themselves bronies and pegasisters.” “Bronies and pegasisters?” Lady Silkwind tilted her head in puzzlement. “Pegasister is clearly a world play on pegasus but what pray tell is a brony?” “Brother pony,” Celestia supplied. “I’m not sure of the etymology but I believe it could also be rendered as brother of ponies, in the figurative rather than literal sense.” “Ah, of course,” Silkwind nodded. “That would seem sensible. So pegasisters are then sisters of ponies. You said figuratively, so that would mean they feel a kinship to ponies?” “Either kinship or great friendship,” Celestia said nodding. “During the recent unpleasantness with Tišina I actually met a pegasister. She was quite knowledgeable about Equestria. I found her intelligent, competent, and very friendly.” “Have you met many humans then?” Lady Silkwind asked casually. “Let me see,” Celestia said, considering. “Six of them, actually. Lady Teagan and her parents, Lady Emma, the pegasister Evelyn Lewis, and a soldier named Matthew Sanders.” “I have not had the pleasure of meeting Lady Teagan. What can you tell me of humans?” Silkwind asked curiously. Celestia paused, thinking. “It’s hard to say, really. In many ways they act like ponies, but in other ways they do not. Humans are omnivores, and Matthew tells me they are pack hunters. They don’t practice magic, but apparently have a good theoretical grasp of it, even though they don’t believe it is real.” “How can that be if they don’t believe it’s real?” Silkwind asked in surprise. “Evelyn told me humans like to play games where they pretend to be mages. Oddly they have legends of pegasi, unicorns, dragons—even griffins. Likewise their legends of magic are quite extensive. What I find fascinating is that their legends cover a vast array of different magical traditions, many that I have never heard of.” “Do you think these legends are borne in dreams the way the plays were inspired? Perhaps from other worlds than Equis?” “It’s very possible,” Celestia admitted. “Of course, since these are games, much of it may simply have come from somepony’s overactive imagination.” “True,” Silkwind nodded. “Still, they sound very intriguing. I had heard that Lady Teagan has returned. Perhaps you could introduce us?” Celestia looked apologetic, “I would be delighted to, Lady Silkwind, but unfortunately Lady Teagan’s duties as the Dronning av Fjellet have not left her much time for social gatherings. She is, after all, queen of the trolls,” Celestia delicately stressed the word. “They have differing views on the usefulness of such gatherings.” “Ah, I understand,” Lady Silkwind said nodding. “Perhaps another time.” “We will be holding a party the night before she returns to her world,” Celestia noted. “I will be sure to tell Faerie Mist to send you an invitation.” “How very kind,” Silkwind smiled at the alicorn. “You mentioned that Lady Emma’s comment prompted your choice of tea for our meeting, Your Highness. May I ask what the comment was?” “Oh!” Celestia laughed, eyes twinkling. “Forgive me! I had completely forgotten your question! For some reason most humans seem to think that Equestrians do nothing all day but have tea parties and play dress up. Lady Teagan and Lady Emma were actually surprised to find out it wasn’t so.” “I’m sorry?” Lady Silkwind’s decorum slipped for a moment as her beak fell open in shock. “How would that even be possible? Surely humans realize clothing and tea services don’t grow on trees? That one must have an income to afford such luxuries?” “One would think so,” Celestia agreed, giggling. “I really must find some way to watch those human plays about Equestria!” The meeting continued for another few minutes before Lady Silkwind took her leave, expressing thanks to her hostess. A few moments after the griffin was safely away Faerie Mist approached her sovereign. “Make sure Lady Silkwind is extended an invitation for Lady Teelo’s farewell party, would you?” Celestia murmured quietly. Her lady-in-waiting nodded. “Of course. What did our esteemed stalker want? Anything I should know about?” Faerie Mist asked, taking a teacake and nibbling it. “It would seem the griffins are beginning to take an interest in humans,” Celestia replied quietly, taking another teacake for herself. “She was unusually curious too. Well, at least somewhat more obvious about it.” “Hmm. What did you give her?” Faerie Mist asked with furrowed brow as she contemplated the implications. Celestia chuckled. “Oh, quite a lot, actually. Once she filters our conversation through griffin sensibilities I predict she’ll report that humans know magic but I want everypony to think they don’t, that humans are indeed dangerous in a way ponies are not, that humans can easily be manipulated, and that Equestria has an extremely close alliance with the human world. I suspect it was our alliance with the trolls that sparked this sudden interest in humans.” Faerie Mist smiled slowly. “Easily manipulated?” Her smile grew wider. “I would give a great deal to be there when Lady Silkwind meets Lady Teagan.” “That’s easily arranged. After all, Lady Teagan will need someone to introduce them,” Celestia said thoughtfully, “and I am always so busy at those gatherings…” Faerie Mist’s smile widened to a delighted grin, showing her teeth. ooOoo Earth, Sunday afternoon, May 29, 2013 2:39 PM Mia Gant walked up to the O’Gara’s home and took a quick breath, before knocking. The door was opened almost immediately by a smiling man in his late thirties. He was dressed in dress slacks and a pullover sweater. “Mr. O’Gara?” she asked. “Yes, are you Mia Gant?” He asked pleasantly. “Yes I am, here’s my card. I’m here to talk to Teagan.” She said, watching him. He took the card and glanced at it. “Won’t you come in?” Standing aside he politely waved her in. As she entered the house her eyes took in her surroundings. The man led her through a hallway and into a living room of a typical middle-class home. Everything was clean, although not overly so. It didn’t appear any special effort had been made to prepare for her visit. She did note the furniture was oddly arranged. A trio of comfortable armchairs were placed along one wall and had been turned to face the couch, which had been pulled into the middle of the room, facing away from another archway that looked as though it led into the dining room. “Won’t you have a seat?” the man said, indicating the couch. She sat down, placing her briefcase beside her. When she looked up she found the man had taken the chair to her left. A slender red haired teenager, Teagan she presumed, was in the middle chair while a woman in her mid-thirties with brown hair was sitting on the right. The woman was staring at her with clear hostility. “Hello, I’m Mia. I’m a social worker for the Department of Children and Families.” She began pleasantly. “We received a report that Teagan could be suffering from neglect. By law the DCF is required to investigate all reports we receive. Let me reassure you this is only an investigation, no one is accusing you of anything. I’m simply here to make sure Teagan is safe, and to help you deal with any problems that you might be having.” “Assuming the report is true, of course.” The woman next to Teagan growled. “Of course,” Mia smiled back. “You’re Teagan’s mother?” “Yes,” the woman said. The word was clipped and icy. “And your name?” Mia asked, apparently unperturbed. “Elaine.” “Elaine, please understand. I’m not here to cause trouble, despite what you might think,” Mia said. “I only want to make sure Teagan isn’t having any problems. I’m sure that’s what you want too, so we’re really on the same side here.” The teen raised her eyebrows. “I’m not having any problems, Miss Gant. I am happily living my life and don’t need any help. Whoever lodged this complaint was either mistaken or malicious. Frankly, I’m offended by this accusation and plan to find out who made it and why.” “It’s not an accusation, Teagan; it’s a report of possible neglect. Please don’t be offended by someone trying to help you.” Mia said placatingly. “I’m pretty sure whoever did this wasn’t trying to help me,” the girl said dryly. “My parents have never neglected me. Your presence here insults both of them, and that makes me angry, Miss Gant. I understand you don’t have a choice in this, that you’re just doing your job. I will even concede you genuinely want to help. So believe me when I say my anger is directed at the source of the complaint and not at you.” “I understand, I really do,” Mia said in a soothing voice. “No one likes it when I show up. I’ve been doing this for ten years and seen everything from heartbreaking abuse to false alarms. I’m just here to see if you need help or not.” She watched them glance at each other and come to a silent agreement. To her trained eye that glance was telling, and she relaxed slightly as the hostility in the room dropped significantly, especially the mother’s. “Forgive me for being frank, Mia,” Teagan said pleasantly. “but I don’t want to waste your time. I don’t need help. I have never been neglected, physically or emotionally. What do you need to see to go away and never come back? My grade point average this year was 3.85 with an advanced curriculum. Physically, I’m extremely fit and strong, with a full ten hours of martial arts training every week. Emotionally, I’m neither depressed nor unstable, as you can see. I love my parents very much and they’ve taught me to be independent and to stay out of trouble. I admit to running away from home during the January before last, but that was because I was being silly. I came back on my own and won’t be doing that again. Now, what else do you want to know?” “You study martial arts?” Mia asked, interested. “Which school? Karate? I’m a brown belt in Goju-ryu myself.” “Impressive,” Teagan said, nodding. “I imagine that comes in handy in some of the rougher neighborhoods. I study Krav Maga, I’m currently a P2 working on my P3.” “That’s a pretty brutal discipline isn’t it?” Mia asked, raising her eyebrows. “Israeli, right? Military?” “Yes. My instructor is a retired Green Beret,” Teagan replied. “I’m doing survival training too, along with some tactical stuff like threat recognition, terrain reconnaissance, that kind of thing.” “What got you into martial arts?” Mia asked enthusiastically, having finally found some common ground. “Do you plan to join the military when you graduate?” “Oh no,” Teagan said chuckling. “I do it for the same reasons you do, I’d imagine. It’s always nice to know how to defend yourself, right? Plus it’s good exercise and a wonderful way to work off stress.” “You have stress to work off?” Mia asked disingenuously. “Not since I started Krav Maga!” Teagan laughed. Mia took the rebuke without comment, all grist for her mill. “So as you can see I’m in no need of help. You’ve been sent on a wild goose chase, Mia.” Teagan said. “I imagine your plate’s already pretty full. No need to waste more time on us.” “You seem awfully eager to be rid of me,” Mia noted. “Why is that?” “I would think that would be obvious, Miss Gant,” Elaine spoke up. “Your being here is a slap in the face, both to us, and to Teagan. Your services aren’t needed here, so leave us in peace to finish raising our daughter as we see fit.” “Elaine may be putting it less tactfully than I would like,” the man spoke up, standing. “But her point is still accurate. A complaint was filed and you did your due diligence. As you can see there is no problem here. Teagan is well fed, well guided, and well loved. We haven’t abused our daughter, nor neglected her. In fact I’m proud of how strong and beautiful a young lady she has become. Will you report this was a false alarm and we’ll not be seeing any more of your people?” Mia sat, thinking about it. As far as she could see there wasn’t anything wrong. The family’s united front wasn’t consistent with neglect, and Teagan’s whole attitude reeked of self-assurance, which was rare in cases of abuse. Their anger at being the target of a DCF investigation was pretty normal as well. Mia came to a decision and closed her briefcase. Standing, she extended her hand. “Yes, Mr. O’Gara. I see no evidence of abuse or neglect in your home. I hope you’ll forgive the inconvenience, however you can understand we at the DCF have to take each report seriously, both by law and as a moral imperative.” “I understand,” he nodded seriously. “You’ve done your duty, Miss Gant. Allow me to see you out.” She nodded and glanced at Teagan, who nodded pleasantly. Even Elaine gave her a neutral faced nod of acknowledgement. As she was driving away she couldn’t stop thinking about the girl’s expression as she’d left. Although her smile had been agreeable enough her eyes had been hard and glittering, an expression far too old to be on her young face. Maybe I’ll have a quiet word with Millicent and find out what the history between them really is, the social worker thought as she swung on the highway to return home.