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// Discord... Helps? 
// Story: The Story of Ian Camron 
// by Swordoath 
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	"Ow... Ow... Ow..." I muttered as I trudged along through the wilderness. My muscles were finally feeling some strain from their constant exertion, and the heat from the sun had left me nearly steaming in the rapidly cooling night air. Other than that nopony, griffon, monster, or god had bothered me. Until, of course, I had to be proven wrong again.
"Ah, hello there, my old friend!" Discord materialized in front of me.
Ignore him and he'll go away, I thought. Please, just go away.
"Hey, why so down, Ian? Even after I came all this way to bring you a present!"
"I don't want anything you've even touched. Shouldn't you be a statue somewhere in a garden right now?" I said without looking up.
"Actually, I'm here on the request of that mare. Serene, wasn't it?"
"What? Sarah sent you here?" I perked up. "Why?"
"She found something belonging to you, and asked me to deliver it." Discord held up the fragmented part of my horn between two claws. "I believe you just need to press it to the stump, and your all set."
Two things came to mind. One, did I really want back the power that had almost destroyed the ones I cared about? And two, could I even trust Discord? What if he was just going to drag me back or something, or make me his zombie slave?
"No. I don't want it."
"Oh, is that so? Pity. Well, I suppose it's time for my 'other gift.' Hold still a moment." He said, thumping me with his clawed hand. 
"Ow!" I shouted at him, swinging a hoof at his arm. "What the hell was that for?"
"What? I don't know what your talking about. I may be God of Chaos, but even I can't understand nonsense like that." He blinked innocently. "Now, about your horn-" 
Without hesitation, I snatched it from his paw. "Give me that," I muttered, fitting it as best I could to the stub. "So I just let the magic-"
I suddenly felt very cold, and slightly dizzy. A line of bluish light ran along the fracture line, erasing it as the light faded. Soon my horn was completely reattached, as if it had never broken in the first place. Other than the nausea and cold, I felt refreshed, like I'd just slept off all my fatigue.
"As much as I hate to say it," I addressed the draconeqques. "Thank you, Discord."
"Oh, it was nothing, really," he said, waving a paw in dismissal. "Besides, it was your friends who found it."
"Oh... Right. Them." I had very mixed feelings about them. I felt betrayed, but I was the traitor. I felt hated, but I was the hater. Waves of guilt and rage rolled over me, not at all helped by the nausea from the horn fix. Eventually my mind settled down on guilt.
"Hm... I take it you don't want to see them right now, do you?" The chaos god observed. I nodded in reply. "You know, I know a place you could stay for a day or two while you collect yourself."
"And where would that be?"
He leaned in close and whispered to me something I could barely make out as "My domain."
"Your... what?"
"My kingdom, of course! You didn't honestly think I stayed back in Sombra's boring old pile of rocks the whole time, did you? No, I was out and about taking the wilderness near here, and making them... better." He explained, grinning maniacally.
"Uh-huh... yeah, well I appreciate the offer, but I'll pass." I said, pushing past him.
"Is that so? Because if that is the case," he pulled up some kind of scroll from behind his ear, and donned a pair of reading glasses. "I have explicit permission to arrest the one who destroyed the castle observatory, attempted to assassinate the Princesses, and nearly destroyed their kingdom by bringing back the Crystal Tyrant, King Sombra."
Seriously? There was an arrest warrent out for me? I guessed it was good I left when I did. 
"I... I guess I'll hide out at your place." I said through gritted teeth. "If you'll have me."
"Wonderful!" He clapped. "Grab my tail."
"Why-"
He snapped his claws, and we were sent flying high into the air, with me yelling a stream of profanity as I left the ground.

"Ow..." I grumbled as I got to my hooves. Or rather, attempted to. The ground was slippery as soap, and an open mouth impact with it confirmed it to be such.
"What the...? Why is the ground made of soap?" I said, rising unsteadily.
"Why not? It's fun! Besides, here in Discordia, you'll find many stranger things." The draconeqques said, mock ice-skating, using sponges instead of skates.
"'Discordia?' Is that really the best you could come up with? You'd think the god of chaos would put a number in there or something." I commented, taking a glance around. The surrounding area was reminiscent of the one we'd left. If you could call 'nothing at all' as being reminiscent. The sky was full of floating chunks of land with trees and homes still on them. Neither the sun nor the moon were out, though the sky was filled with pink clouds seemingly moving at random of their own accord. The ground itself was now warped and twisted in ways I didn't think were even possible. "Think you left your mark here yet? It looks like the world's on acid or something. God, and what is that smell?"
"That would be a recomposing tree." Discord said as he turned me around to watch a tree un-rot and go through it's life cycle in reverse.
"... Huh. Y'know, this place is pretty cool, for something you made."
"Oh, and you've only seen the wilderness. Come on now, follow me!" He said, skating down the soap path through on on the loops created by the distorted land.