The Biography of a Transdimensional Brony
"That's new." John understated.
"Your computer doesn't do that normally?" Twilight asked, confused.
"No." John breathed as the screen returned to normal. "There we go."
"So, what do we do now?" Renee asked.
"You're in a library." John said bluntly.
Twilight asked Renee if she had a certain genre in mind. They went off, as James took Holiday to explore the town, as she seemed to be able to guide him.
This left John, his computer, and his dog; who was curled up, sleeping on his lap. John began typing away on his keyboard.
Help! I'm stuck in a world full of technicolor ponies!
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"I have such great friends." John said sarcasticly. Just then, five letters poofed into existance, and hit the back of his head in machine-gun fashion.
John picked up one.
I'll be there in a sec.
-RD
John grabbed the rest and skimmed through them, all seemed to follow Rainbow Dash's example. As he finished reading the letters, a large scroll appeared in front of him, with a sun emblem on the ribbon, which was purple. John snatched it out of the air, and hastily opened it. Much to his disappointment, only three words were written.
I'll be there.
"Well, Celestia reads the mail." John observed, not at all surprised. "I mean, isn't that what governments do?" John asked himself.
"I just don't know why you don't have anything like Harry Potter." Renee explained to the lavender unicorn in front of her.
"I'm sorry, it seems that it has not been written yet." Twilight stated.
"Fine, how about any horror stories?" Renee asked.
"Follow me." Twilight motioned.
They went off to a small room filled with more books than the shelves could hold, books were stacked in towers on the floor. It was lit by a small gas lantern.
"Hey Twilight!" John bellowed, startling the mare and causing the books to shift and rustle.
Twilight walked to the main library. "What?" She asked.
"Where's your lab?" John questioned.
"Why?" Twilight countered.
"I have some great ideas to try here, mostly to see if basic physics carry over." John elaborated with a dismissive wave of his hands.
"Sure, just through that door." Twilight responded, and pointed to a small, slightly charred, door.
John thanked the unicorn and asked one last question. "Do you have potassium nitrate, charcoal powder, and sulfur?"
"Yes, they are labeled, you should be able to find them easily." Twilight stated.
John thanked her again, than went through the door, behind which lay a staircase, which he went down.
He was met with a decent sized lab, which looked more suited to alchemy than modern science, but nonetheless, would serve the purpose he had in mind. He immediately spotted three large barrels labeled with the aforementioned chemicals. He then set out on a search for a tri-beam scale.
He found it, twenty minutes later, right on top of the barrels.
He sucked at finding things.
"Let's get to work." John said, as he retrieved three bowls, filling them with chemicals after weighing them. He then poured the appropriate ratio into a pile on a slab of stone he found.
"Fire." John reminded himself. he grabbed a wooden rod and transferred the flame from a nearby lamp to the small pile. It made a small pop and produced a metric tonne of smoke. John coughed and fanned the smoke from his face, smiling.
"Perfect." John whispered. He began the process of small-scale mass production. Eventually arriving at a small mountain of black powder. He uttered a evil laugh and quickly placed the powder in the barrels the ingredients once occupied.
Meanwhile: Holiday was taking James on a tour of Ponyville, as they saw a rainbow streak fly past them, followed closely by a pink one.
They both stood in shock, then set off towards them, heading in the direction of the library.
There was a hurried rapping at the door, which Twilight ran to answer, leaving Renee engrossed in a book entitled 'Night Shift'.
She opened the door to see her five friends gathered on her doorstep. All asked to come in, and if she was alright.
"Yes, I'm fine, come in." Twilight confirmed and ushered the ponies inside.
John bolted up the stairs, hearing many footsteps. He burst out of the door, hair blown back and face sooty in true mad scientist mode.
"Hello small ponies!" He bellowed, in a mock Russian accent.
All the ponies stared at him, expression ranging from fear to confusion. Rainbow Dash broke the silence first.
"What are you?" She boldly asked.
"I am human, my name is John." John explained, maintaining the accent.
"Why are you here?" Rainbow Dash inquired.
"I don't know, a button appeared in my house, my stepdad pushed it, my family and I went through, now I'm here." John elaborated, ditching the accent, for now.
"Seems legit." Rainbow stated, shaking her head, agreeing.
"Wh- what's that?" A quiet voice asked from the back, and a yellow hoof gestured to the computer, softly whirring.
"Is Sasha, my computer." John picked the accent up again. He laughed heartily, and then explained to them what a computer was.
"Oh..." Fluttershy said, then her eyes landed on Jack. She immediately went over to him and fussed over him.
"Who's a cute little puppy?" She asked rhetorically, in a sing-song voice.
"I am." Jack responded. Fluttershy gasped and started asking Jack all sorts of questions.
"Ah have to wonder, what's that smell. It smells like them fireworks that that Trixie gal was usin'. " Applejack asked, covering her muzzle with a hoof.
"That's my fault. I wanted to see if gunpowder could be created here, and it can." John gave a thumbs up gesture, and as he did so, a large cracking sound was heard, as darkness filled the room for a second.
"Hello bipedal subject." Princess Luna stated to the awestruck human.
"Your majesty." John replied as he bowed.
"Rise, human." Luna commanded. "We have much work to do."
"What do you mean?" John asked.
"We have much paperwork to do." Luna stated.
"What's going on?" Renee, Holiday, and James asked in unison.
"Family, this is Princess Luna, one of the two monarchs of Equestria, excluding Princess Mi Amore Cadenza." John explained.
Just then, a rustling could be heard, and a red object fell to the floor, face down. An inverted rainbow portal opened, and sucked Renee, James and Holiday in. It closed as suddenly as it opened. A small bunny was on top of John's backpack, grinning devilishly.
"You. Just. Sent. My family. AWAY!" John screamed, putting a one-handed stranglehold on Angel. Fluttershy gasped as the bunny squirmed in John's grasp.
"John, you're hurting him." Fluttershy whimpered softly. John tightened his grip, then dropped an oxygen deprived bunny, who started gulping in the air around him, trying to catch his breath.
"I'm going into the lab." John sighed, as he motioned for Jack to follow. He climbed down the stairs once again, feeling the air cool and moisten. It had a calming effect, as John felt he could breath again.
He looked around the lab, assessing the supplies at hand.
"Equestria shall pay." John grinned.