Ponyville
Present Day: 6 Months Later
The day had finally arrived. A stage had been set up just outside the train station, along with a banner and a cloud of confetti that Twilight (with persuasion from Pinkie) had enchanted to climb the walls and throw itself.
The setup had been vastly simplified from Pinkie’s original plan, something for which Twilight was grateful. After hearing the original party idea, which had called for, among other things, a catapult, Spike’s fire breath, and an unfortunate quantity of cephalopods, Twilight (with assistance from Rarity and Applejack) had persuaded Pinkie to go with a simpler idea so as to avoid overwhelming the Guildmasters.
The Guild train had arrived only a few moments ago, and its passengers – according to the mayor, who had been apprised of the procedure beforehand – would shortly be coming onstage and each speaking briefly before beginning the inspection of the various members of their respective Guilds in Ponyville. The mayor herself was on stage to greet them, along with Pinkie Pie.
The crowd, which had been muttering excitedly to each other, fell silent as the curtain shifted and Poison Point walked out onto the stage, holding the hoof of a cloaked pony that Twilight assumed was Axle Grease, the elderly Guildmaster of Machinery. Though Axle was stooped and trotted along sedately alongside Poison, it was still obvious that he had once been a very tall pony, evinced by the fact that even hunched down as he was, he was still a hoof-length or two taller than Poison. Twilight was also surprised to note the long, handsome horn that protruded from under the thick hood; it was dark brown, but heavily polished until it gleamed like gold. Obviously it was a source of pride for the aging Guildmaster.
He shook the mayor’s hoof, and then Pinkie’s. She said something to him that was lost to the distance, and he and Poison approached the microphone at the front of the stage. Axle cleared his throat and then began to speak.
“Firstly, I’d like to apologise for hiding my face. I received a grievous wound some fifty years ago which left me permanently scarred, but I hope it won’t interfere with anypony’s impressions of me.” His voice croaked and rasped like a candle flame in the wind. “Now, I’ve been Guildmaster for nigh on a century, and in all that time, the closest thing I’ve seen to a close-knit community is the Guild itself. Poison Point here tells me that Ponyville is a nice place full of nice ponies. That being the case, I think we’ll find our visit here to be most pleasant. Barring any unusual circumstances, of course, like a dragon attack.” Axle chuckled at his last comment, which quickly turned into a bout of coughing. As Poison Point guided him to the back of the stage, he withdrew a small flask from his cloak and drank from it.
Then, a pale gray unicorn with a cropped salt-and-pepper mane took the stage. His cutie mark depicted a chisel suspended over a gray block. He too shook the hooves of Pinkie and Mayor Mare, and then approached the microphone.
“My name is Stone Cutter, everypony.” He smiled pleasantly. “Guildmaster of the smallest and slowest-growing guild in the entire arrangement. I hope to know everypony much better by the end of this week.” He looked back. “I’m not the best with public speaking, but at least I always speak before Iron. Come on up, Iron!” He clopped his hoof on the stage and backed over to stand to Poison Point’s left.
Iron Shod’s hoofsteps on the stairs sounded slightly off, and as he ascended to the stage it was revealed why; his right forehoof was missing and replaced with a griffon claw made of what looked like cast-iron. His grayish-blue coat was marred by a pinkish scar that covered the right half of his face and neck, stretching from the base of his horn to his collarbone. The eye sitting in the scar was covered by an intricately tooled metal eyepatch. His mane was black, and his cutie mark depicted a hammer underneath a simple horseshoe. He also appeared to be built like Tom the boulder.
Instead of a speech, he simply grunted, nodded at the audience, and took his place to the left of Stone.
After Iron Shod had left the stage, there was a pause, long enough that ponies in the audience started to look around in confusion. Suddenly, the large tree overhanging the stage rustled loudly and disgorged a pony that Twilight almost mistook for Pinkie at a glance. Their coats were the exact same shade, and their manestyles were identical, but the new pony’s mane was streaked with a pale cream color, and also nearly completely obscured a magenta horn poking out of her forehead. In addition, the new pony’s cutie mark depicted some kind of cream-filled cookie.
After bouncing back from her impact with the stage, the pony hopped up to the microphone. Twilight realized who this must be a moment before she introduced herself.
“Hi! I’m Macaroon! But you can call me Mac if you want. It’s a lot shorter, and more fun to say. Oh right! Nearly forgot!” She hopped over to the Mayor and shook her hoof rapidly, grinning madly all the while, and then shared a hug with Pinkie. Then she returned to the microphone. “Anyway, as I was going to say, I can’t wait to try all the tasty little treats this town has to offer. As an aside, if Pinks doesn’t throw a party to welcome us here, I will, and everyone is invited either way. Cephalopods! Woohoo!” She threw a hoof in the air, and then retreated to sit by Iron.
The fifth of the seven Guildmasters followed promptly after; a tall, slender, snow-white unicorn mare with flowing lime-green hair and a cutie mark depicting a needle threaded with acid-green thread. Like Macaroon and Stone, she was smiling, but uncomfortably so. Above the grin, her eyes flicked laconically around the assembled crowd.
She tapped the microphone and cleared her throat, reciting woodenly, “My name is Shimmerthread. I’ve heard several wonderful things about this place. I look forward to meeting each and every one of you.” With the look of a pony who had just stumbled in something unpleasant, she trotted back to sit to Axle’s right.
After Shimmerthread had sat down (and Stone Cutter had thrown her an irritated glance), the sixth Guildmaster ascended to the stage. He too was a unicorn, with a dark maroon coat and bruise colored mane, and a cutie mark depicting a sickle cutting a bundle of wheat. The stallion was built like Applejack’s brother Macintosh.
“I am Grain Chaff.” He had a strong Stalliongrad accent. “Is not first time I have been to Ponyville. I have not been in some time, however. I look forward to seeing how place has changed.” He too went to stand in the row of Guildmasters, next to Shimmerthread.
If Twilight remembered Rarity’s lessons accurately, that meant the only pony left was whoever had succeeded Two Face as Guildmaster of theater. A drumroll seemed to come out of nowhere, though a quick glance revealed that Macaroon had somehow obtained a set of drums.
Then, not one but two nearly identical ponies climbed the steps onto the stage. Two very familiar ponies.
“Tough crowd, Flam.”
“I know as well as you, Flim.”
“We’re really sorry about how our last visit ended up, folks.”
“And not just because we got run out of town by an angry mob.”
“But rest assured, we aren’t going to try and sell you any cider or related paraphernalia this time around.”
“This time around we’re just here about performances.”
“I mean, our song wasn’t bad, was it?”
“Easily the best part of our first visit.”
“Anyway, the point is, give us another chance and we promise not to sell you any more metaphorical snake oil.”
The brothers bowed in unison and retreated to the row of Guildmasters to stand next to Grain Chaff. A number of ponies in the audience were whispering inaudibly amongst themselves, no doubt expressing various opinions about the Flim Flam brothers. They quieted down somewhat when the mayor stepped up to the microphone.
“Now that we’ve officially met all sev… er, eight Guildmasters, we’re prepared to begin the tour in earnest. Now, let’s all properly welcome our esteemed guests to Ponyville.” With that, she sat back and clopped her hooves together. Pinkie joined in with a halved coconut, and the audience followed suit. Flim, Flam, Stone, Macaroon, and Grain bowed in a more or less exaggerated manner, while Axle inclined his head lightly and Shimmerthread rolled her eyes. Iron Shod simply stood watching the audience impassively, a state Twilight was beginning to think was his permanent state of existence.
After a short time, the applause ceased, and the Guildmasters left the stage to grab any tools they might require for their various inspections. The audience proceeded to slowly filter back to their homes or places of business.
Ponyville: Guild train
Moments later
“Oh, thank god. I thought it would never end.” Shimmerthread massaged the back of her neck with a hoof. “And now I’ve got to spend the rest of the day reviewing these earth ponies’ travesties of fabric-work.”
“Now, Shimmerthread,” said Axle Grease as he passed by. “These ponies are our hosts. You would do well to treat them with the respect entailed by such a position.” He opened the door at the end of the car and proceeded in the direction of his own cabin, accompanied by his ever-present aide, Poison Point.
“Creaky old twit,” she muttered under her breath. Iron Shod, passing by, uttered a short bark of amusement.
She gestured to him. “Hang on a second, Iron. There’s something I need to discuss with you.” He trotted over to stand by her. She was about to start speaking when the Flim Flam Brothers passed through the car as well, accompanied by Grain Chaff.
“Well, yeah, we sort of figured that out for ourselves. They’re better than we were because they worked together, whereas we tried to monopolize the cider market,” said Flim.
“Which basically amounts to most of the economy here,” finished Flam.
“Was not such the Ponyvillers’ success, but rather your own failure. As I said, they better understand how the world ought to work, yes?” Grain Chaff replied in his thick accent. He turned to Shimmerthread. “Ah, young lady. I have been meaning to speak with you. It will not take long. I need only say, you must relax in presence of ponies from Ponyville. Is not same as Canterlot where you are expected to believe certain things. Ponies will not like you if you simply parrot upper class beliefs as you do.”
Iron Shod glared at the group until they left.
“We found it,” she said simply to him.
Iron raised an eyebrow in the largest display of emotion he had made in the seven years Shimmerthread had worked with him.
“I see from your expression you know what I’m talking about. Good. That means I don’t have to explain. The point being, we only have to endure this miserable existence for another week or so. All we need to do is retrieve the object, and we’re in business.”
Iron grinned nastily.
“Yes. No more of that creaky old mechanic. Only one more week and our master, Prince Cogspin the Scorned, will once more walk the halls of Canterlot Castle as its rightful king.”
Iron chuckled throatily, joined shortly after by Shimmerthread’s own high pitched laughter.