On the Subject of Weather and Mentality
June 23th
Time: 8:30 pm
Day: Wednesday
What constitutes a storm? It is a question I've asked myself all day.
Early in the morning, not too long after I had breakfast, I sensed a change in wind patterns coming from my open window. By this point, I've been used to the humid summertime air that sits heavy on my body. It makes even the most basic of activities incredibly uncomfortable, to where I'd rather just stay in my cool basement and read all day.
As the wind picked up in velocity, I could also sense a gradual decrease in the overall temperature. The humidity was still present, but without the warm temperatures, the phenomenon wasn't as difficult to deal with. For the first time in around a week or so, the air felt rather pleasant and enjoyable as I felt the breeze hit my face.
So I went outside for a breath of fresh air. Expecting to be greeted by plentiful rays of sunshine, I was instead face to face with a thick blanket of gray, stretching as far as the eye could see. Examining them for an instance, it was clear that they were cumulonimbus clouds in the way they towered menacingly over Ponyville.
I knew the deal by now. When anypony comes across clouds that look like these, chances are you'll see thunder, lightning, and most significantly, rain. Sure enough, I could feel tiny water droplets begin to fall onto my mane. Looking up, I watched as swaths of rain fell from the heavens, no end in sight. The incoming storm put me in a trance, but I was able to snap myself out of it and get back inside before I was soaked to the bone.
The library shook barely a second after I came inside, a loud crackle that made head snap towards the window as a brilliant flash of light illuminated the air. I backed away from the windows, a little tip my mother used to give me during thunderstorms. She always explained that sometimes the resulting sonic boom from the thunder could produce sound waves potent enough to crack, and even break glass. While I still hold doubt to her theory, it didn't stop me from heeding her advice.
A half an hour passed before the storm finally loosened its grip. The wind driven waves of rain tapered off to some lighter showers, as the sun peeked through holes forming in the clouds. A final clap of thunder proved all the storm had left to offer, and soon the rain stopped completely.
This type of weather has proven to be common during the summertime, which brings me back to the question I had written to start.
What is a storm?
My first thought was to check a dictionary. Naturally, I already knew all the meanings of the word. The most popular one was what had just occurred. The book stated a storm as being,"a violent disturbance of the atmosphere with strong winds and usually rain, thunder, lightning, or snow. Caused by instability." Judging by the weather we had just experienced, I would call that half an hour of rain, wind, and thunder a storm of some sort.
But there are also other definitions. The dictionary told me that a storm could also mean an uproar or controversy, as well as a military tactic, like if an army attacks a castle. It also mentioned the word as being a verb, which again mentioned military tactics and the weather, but also made mention of somepony moving angrily. I've definitely stormed off many times in my life.
The dictionary only helped to give me a basis on what the word mean on the outside. There had to be more to it, but right now I don't feel like reading till the end of the world to find out. Perhaps a special study session is in line for tomorrow.
For now, a nice cup of tea is calling my name.
-Twilight
June 24th
Time: 7:30 pm
Day: Thursday
I recall mentioning a study session about the word storm in yesterday's entry. Flipping back for a second, I proved this to be true.
I ended sort of having that study session, only it was much different than my previous ones. For starters, the entire session lacked the involvement of the books I had picked out in my mind. In fact, it lacked any books at all, one of the elements I consider to be essential to studying. Second, the whole thing was completely impromptu. In essence, this wasn't really all too big a negative, as genuineness proves to be useful in studying something.
Early this afternoon, I took a stroll into the market to pick up a few grocery items I had run out of. These included oranges, bananas, avocados, and celery. This isn't really important information really when I come to think of it.
Anyway, as I was in the market I ran into a pegasus friend of mine out of the blue. Rainbow Dash was in her words "chilling" next to the apple stand where Applejack was currently on a lunch break, munching on one of her signature apples. I swear to Celestia, that pony never does get tired of the fruit. If I ate the same thing over and over again, even if it was my favorite food, surely there would come a time where I would become sick of it right? Especially if I was working with it each and every day. But I digress, as I'm getting really off-topic here.
So a little idea popped into my mind about the study session I had planned to have. Instead of consulting books, why don't I ask somepony I know about them.
The first one to come to mind was Rainbow Dash.
It made perfect, logical sense. Being part of the weather team and in charge (supposedly) of all of the weather systems over Ponyville, surely she must have dealt with storms.
The reaction I got when I approached her was something out of the ordinary.
Gone was the Rainbow Dash I've become accustomed to since moving here. The coolness, easy-going attitude, and "swagger" (She described herself as having this once. I still haven't found a dictionary with this word) disappeared instantly. Even Applejack looked quizzically at Rainbow.
What replaced this, I determined was an overwhelming sense of anxiety. After I said hello to both of them, I could see her eyes darting from one side to the other, her tail twitching a bit similar to Pinkie's. Celestia help us if we have two ponies with something like Pinkie sense. I don't think Ponyville, or myself, would be able to handle that. But she was nervous about something in particular, and I had a brewing hunch it involved me in some capacity.
She mouthed a hello in return, her voice cracking strangely as she did so. Her overall attitude was making the situation really uncomfortable for all of us, and I wasn't sure if I even wanted to ask her the question.
A second later, Rainbow rattled off an almost incomprehensible excuse about having to do practice some techniques for the upcoming tryout for the Wonderbolts. And with that, she rocketed straight up into the sky and stormed off, much quicker than usual and with a sense of urgency which didn't add up.
I looked at AJ and then back up, the only look she gave was one of confusion herself. I asked her about Rainbow's behavior, and she mentioned that Rainbow was telling her something before I came over. She was sure, but she said that whatever it was portrayed to me in some form, but as a stern order given from Rainbow, was unable to tell me what it was.
With that, I guess I got one meaning of the word storm today. But I'm still nowhere closer to my answer than I was yesterday.
Right now, I was stuck on what Rainbow Dash was saying about me. I just hope it wasn't anything bad. No, it couldn't be. Rainbow is one of my closest friends.
Perhaps I'm over thinking something trivial.
-Twilight
June 26th
Time: 9:30 pm
Day: Saturday
Curiosity has gotten the best of me the last two days.
Part of me said to drop the whole ordeal with Rainbow Dash and the way she acted. There could have been some legitimate reason for her to act the way she did. Getting nosey and into her life wasn't the best idea anyway. Besides, even though Rainbow was a pony who always put her thoughts out onto the table, she still might have secrets she doesn't want others, or specific ponies, to know about. Being a good friend, one of the lessons of friendship I learned was to respect somepony's privacy.
However, only part of me said this. It was the other side of me which won out.
The same oddity happened this afternoon as I saw her walking past the library, talking to Scootaloo. As I was inside, she couldn't see me, but once she was in vicinity of the windows, she made a remark about giving Scootaloo a fly around the town. Of course the filly said yes, as she was so enamored by Rainbow's presence. It was cute to see how Rainbow reacted to her excitement.
So before I could drop what I was doing to say hi, Rainbow was gone. Between the instance I saw her and when she flew away, it was less than 30 seconds.
By now, I was both very confused as to the reason behind this situation, but also very curious onto what the cause might be.
As I ate my breakfast the next morning, I replayed the scene from that day. Whatever Rainbow was telling Applejack, it was something she considered important given the way she reacted.
Ever since the incident at the Running in the Leaves, the pair have become the best of friends. Even Applejack remarked in a conversation with me once that since that day, she's probably spent more time with Rainbow than any of us. It was as if the pegasus became an unofficial sister to her.
With that in mind, I was sure that Applejack was a go to for any problems Rainbow felt like talking about. I know from experience that although she may not know exactly what to do in most situations, AJ was an exceptional listener.
But I knew there was one other pony Rainbow would go to in a time of distress. So as soon as I finished my breakfast, I made my way to Fluttershy's cottage.
Out of all of us, Rainbow Dash knew Fluttershy well before she came to Ponyville. They both were former students at flight school together from the one time I asked about it. Fluttershy mentioned how Rainbow Dash stood up for her that one day, which happened to be the first time they met one another. Since that day, they've been the best of friends.
I expected Rainbow had mentioned something to Fluttershy, but I wasn't sure if she would be comfortable telling me what is was. Fluttershy was always true to her morals, and one of those was to keep promises. If she had promised to keep what Rainbow said hidden from me, then it was impossible for me to convince her otherwise.
It was apparent Angel was about to be given dinner as I knocked on her door. She answered happily, inviting me inside. I mentioned that I had something important to ask her, after she gave Angel his dinner. The expression of gratitude the rabbit gave me was priceless.
More often than not, I would bat around the bush when it came asking more personal questions. This time, I asked her bluntly about what was with Rainbow Dash lately.
The answer I got was surprising.
She explained in detail that the odd behavior of her friend hadn't gone unnoticed, but mentioned that there was a very good reason she couldn't tell me. What she did say, was that I did deserve to know, and I would with time as long as I stayed patient.
Fluttershy described Rainbow as being a storm of emotions right now, and heeded advice in the form of leaving her be. She couldn't recall the last time her friend ever felt the way she currently did, but mentioned that she could see it coming.
I thanked her and she offered me dinner, but I had to refuse, as I developed a headache from thinking so much. What she reiterated as I left was to "let her come to me." I understood what that meant, but who knows how long that could take?
Maybe I'll just go back to researching the meaning behind the word storm as I wait.
-Twilight
June 27th
Time: 5:00pm
Day: Sunday
Nothing like the quiet morning hours to facilitate in depth thinking.
I woke up a bit earlier today, energized and eager to do some research. Turns out I have a 26 volume series of encyclopedias on the origins of certain words in the library. I've never seen it before, and it's probably the first time I had ever taken one of these books off the shelf.
The book for the letter S was massive, taking it off the shelf was a challenge in itself. It made a loud thunk as I put it on my desk, and I started to flip through the pages, finding the word storm pretty easily.
For each word, the book repeated the definition word for word. In fact, as I scanned them for a second time, I noticed they were identical to the dictionary. I decided to re-read it anyway, as it would be a good idea to refresh my memory.
This time, one of the words in the definition stood out.
Instability.
The gears started to turn, and I reached for my dictionary which sat on the end of my desk. Instability wasn't a difficult word to figure out by any means, the basic meaning is the state of being unstable.
As if on cue, the situation with Rainbow Dash reappeared in my mind, although with a twist. Last time, those thoughts forcefully shoved out anything else I was thinking about. Now, similarities between the word storm and Rainbow's odd behavior swirled around, forming new hypotheses I didn't think about initially.
The way she's been acting could be described as being unstable. Normal ponies don't put extra effort into avoidance, nor do they sweat and get fidgety when talking to specific pony.
With this in mind, does that mean her mental state could be classified as one of a storm? Her mind right now is comparable to a storm... which sounds like a textbook case of reverse personification.
But this all depends on just how emotionally unstable Rainbow Dash really is. I haven't even spoken to the mare since that odd and uncomfortable confrontation on Wednesday. As any good scientist knows, it's hard to try and prove a hypothesis true with a lack of proper data.
The only way I could get sufficient data was to try and talk to Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy's advice still echoed in my ears, and I knew the pegasus was right, even if I wanted to think otherwise. It pained me to go against a friend's advice, but I did have a good reason in doing so. Then again, she never did say I had to listen to what she said.
Besides, I have the perfect idea on how to make this work.
Hopefully Rarity wasn't too busy.
-Twilight
June 28th
Time: 3:00pm
Day: Monday
The plan has been set.
Later this morning, I had gone to Rarity's and was lucky to catch her on a lighter workload. I was afraid she might be too busy with her work to help me out, as she mentioned a couple of weeks ago about a rather strenuous order from a couple of higher class mares from Canterlot. There was a twinkle in her eye as she told me the news, and I could only sit back and marvel at her success. It made me wonder how those mares had discovered Carousel Boutique, as it wasn't a well known place outside of Ponyville.
I updated her on the situation with Rainbow Dash, to which she remarked speaking briefly with her a few days ago. She told me that it was initially a normal small-talk conversation, nothing really out of the ordinary. This changed completely when she mentioned my name.
Rarity told me she asked Rainbow Dash about if she had seen me recently, to which the pegasus gave her a rushed answer of no, her explanation being that I was swamped with research and work with Princess Celestia. She proceeded to question Rainbow's sudden nervousness and anxiety to where she became very defensive and flew off.
In the end, she delightfully agreed to the plan I conjured up.
The whole idea was simple as can be. Rarity was going to ask Rainbow Dash to come over because she wanted to apologize for something she might have said which angered Rainbow. At the same instance, I would be at Rarity's because I requested her services in fixing up my comforter which had ripped and needed to be sewn. As a result, Rainbow and I would be in the same place at the same time, and I could question her directly about the odd behavior she's been expressing recently.
It was full-proof if I say so myself.
...As long as Rainbow shows up. Speaking of which, it's time for me to head on over there.
Let's hope this works.
-Twilight
June 28th
Time: 8:00pm
Day: Monday
I know that I should be doing something more important. For one, my to do list is reaching the length of Starswirl the Bearded's Beard and continues to grow longer even with the effort I place upon myself to finish it. One day it's going to be the death of me.
None of this matters right now though, because I have something that has vaulted to the top of my "give these your full undivided attention" list.
What in the hay is up with Rainbow Dash?!
I had the utmost confidence that all my questions would be answered with that plan. Instead, it only made things worse, and now I have even more questions than I started out with. For example, why did my perfect plan turn out to be not so perfect?
Everything started out as I envisioned it. I was seated on the couch, talking with Rarity when Rainbow flew into the Boutique, the door swinging open fully with a loud bang. She landed with her usual gracefulness, mouthing something along the lines of a question onto why Rarity thought she had to apologize.
It was this second she must have noticed me out of the corner of her eye, because her entire body froze up. I could make out her eyes which darted to the exit and back and me, and I was certain she wanted to fly right out the door.
To my surprise she stayed, although I thought she was going to have a panic attack at any moment.
I even remembered the entire conversation we had, mostly because of how brief it was...
"So... How ya doin Twilight?"
"Look Rainbow, we all know that you're hiding something from me specifically, and I want to tell you that whatever it is, you can tell me," I reassured, trying to make the situation as comfortable as it possibly could be. "I promise you, no matter how silly it may be, I'll be sincere and won't judge you at all."
A long winded sigh left her body as she stared downcast at the floor. My hope was at an all-time high, and I felt so confident that I would finally hear the answer to the question that's plagued my mind for the last couple days.
There was something strange about Rainbow's demeanor though. The anxiety was still present, as was the hesitation, but I could see another emotion rising out of her which I don't ever recall seeing.
Fear.
"Twilight... I can't express how much I wanna tell you this, really I can't. It feels like shaking a bottle of soda pop, the pressure continues to build and build, until it becomes too much. At this point, I'm like the bottle of soda, only I'm not shaken up to the point where I'll crack and tell you."
The sincerity in her voice was strange, because it sounded nothing like Rainbow Dash. But it was easy to hear, every word the pegasus said was completely genuine.
"I'll keep your promise in mind, and I'll trade you a promise of my own. I promise that if you wait, eventually I'll come around and tell you. I can't force myself to do it right now, but I will sooner than later."
Both Rarity and I watched as she slowly walked out the front door, before running a few paces to gain speed as she flew into the sky.
I was a cauldron of emotions myself as I tried to figure out what had happened. Even Rarity looked mystified by the whole ordeal, which gave me a hint that perhaps Rainbow didn't tell her the entire truth. Now I wondered if what she told Fluttershy and Applejack wasn't as accurate as they believed.
In times of distress about a subject like this, I'd take refuge in the indulgence of my books.
Tonight wasn't one of those nights, and all I desire is cup of tea and my warm bed.
Thankfully both are in great supply.
-Twilight
June 29th
Time: 9:00pm
Day: Tuesday
I decided to go back to comparing the building blocks of what a storm is to mental and emotional distress. At this rate, I feel like I'm closer to becoming a psychologist. Come to think of it, that type of job suits me pretty well. To help others by listening to their emotional and mental problems, while doing research on the pony mind would be interesting. I have to keep that in mind if I ever get tired of this library, which I expect will never happen.
There was a book I found which detailed some of the signs of emotional distress that one should look out for. I figured that at the very least, Rainbow would show a couple of these signs. The problem was, most of them didn't apply.
Rainbow didn't look to be tired, was as physically fit as she always was, and looked to be in control of herself aside from her emotions. The list had 10 different items on it, and the only one I could check off is mood swings and erratic behavior. As any scientist knows, to prove something is true, one needs a majority to prove their hypothesis. A one out of ten doesn't do that.
So here at my desk I sit, not much further than I was a few days ago.
I was certain there were elements I missed, and tried to locate them in my now crammed brain. Eventually, one aspect shined through.
Storms had a trigger, something which drove them to become powerful weather systems like the thunderstorm from last week. The most common one is warm humid air which facilitated cloud development.
The same must be the case for Rainbow Dash. Nopony suddenly begins to randomly act like she has overnight without having some trigger or source for said action.
Although I consider it a sin to make assumptions without the proper evidence, I wrote that Rainbow's emotional turmoil was definitely affected by something of this sort. As much as I wanted to talk to her and find out, as I friend I had to listen to her promise. As loyal as she was, Rainbow was not the type of pony who would ever break a promise, knowing how important they are to a friendship.
I still dawned on what she held inside her mind. The way she looked at me when she made her promise made me as confused as ever. Beneath her exterior which amounted to a whirlwind of emotions, all of which collided with one another, was the Rainbow Dash I knew. I could see it she looked into my eyes when she made that promise to me. It was like a the calm eye of a hurricane.
I felt a brisk wind sweep through the window, moving a few papers as the candle flickered on my desk. Shadows danced around the room in a graceful fashion as stared blankly before me. I could feel my eyelids droop, sleep wanting to overtake my body, which I would happily oblige.
It was my mind that remained awake and alert, centered around this whole ordeal. One of the shadows I could make out in the little light I had was a massive stack of books, ones I was responsible in reading. As of now, I was at least three or four days behind schedule, and this continued to increase by the day.
But every time I tried to do other research, or read one of the books I needed, my mind wandered away, and my concentration was lost. Any focus I had centered back to Rainbow Dash, causing any single activity to become fruitless. Although I hate to admit it, I was becoming obsessed with this whole ordeal. The more I tried to deny it, the greater the obsession grew, almost like a virus feeding off my concentration.
At this rate, if Rainbow didn't come to me soon, I would have no choice but to go to her.
-Twilight
June 30th
Time: 9:00am
Day: Wednesday
This journal is the only thing keeping me sane.
The last few nights I've received only a couple hours of sleep. It was enough to allow me to function, but at a very subdued rate. I've felt increasingly tired these past few days, to the point where I considered casting sleeping spells on myself. I considered that option to be on the extreme end, since there were serious side effects that could result from said spell.
I've been awake all night researching different topics, from allergies, to infections, to reasons onto why a pony would be angry at their friend. I made a note to clean up my room later, as there were books strewn all over the floor. Various papers accompanied them, each one filled with scribbles and notes, some of which I can't even read myself.
I had a nagging thought in the back of mind concerning the possibility that I upset Rainbow Dash. It was really the only reason I haven't put much consideration with yet. Now that I thought about it, perhaps I said something that offended her?
But how does one really offend a pony as strong willed as Rainbow Dash? I knew I would never say anything bad about any of our friends, nor would I ever insult her flying ability. Sure, I would joke about her multiple crashes due to her flight practices, but I was certain she knew that I was only joking. At least I hoped she knew I was...
Unless Rainbow is actually offended by all of these little teases we give her? I could see Rainbow as being a pony who would hide more negative emotions like betrayal. She wouldn't want it to affect the overall appearance she has of being tough as nails, even if I explained to her multiple times that comparing metal to living cells doesn't make any sense.
The very thought that we slowly eroded her indestructible outer shell over time scared me. I considered Rainbow Dash one of my closest friends, but I never really knew about her sensitive side, nor did I know anything about what she hid under the thick personality she had.
A pool of wax was all that remained of the candles I read by, and I made a mental note to buy some more once I felt awake enough to leave the library. I didn't even have any desire to get off my chair, my body completely exhausted. I decided a hot shower was in order after I write this, one of the only ways I could possibly wake myself up.
Maybe I was thinking too much into this whole thing. I was a hundred percent certain that my lack of sleep was to explain for my erratic thinking, and I was shocked I could even write this successfully.
And now somepony is knocking on my door. From what I could hear, it sounded like Rarity.
A little early isn't it?
-Twilight
June 30th
Time: 12:00pm
Day: Wednesday
So, just when things couldn't get any more confusing, Rarity comes over and has something urgent to tell me. My initial reaction is to worry, since she is well aware of the Rainbow Dash problem. However, she had a smile on her face as I answered the door, which usually indicates good news.
Rarity sat down on my couch as I took a seat beside her. Almost instantly, she gasped in shock as she looked at me. Remembering that I've been awake for over 24 hours now, coupled with the lack of sleep I've been getting, I can only imagine how my appearance must look.
"Twilight darling, you look positively disheveled beyond words! Have you been sleeping okay?"
"I haven't had a good night's sleep in four nights, my body just refuses to comply. I didn't even sleep at all last night," I answered, finally noticing the hoarseness of my own voice. I excused myself to grab a glass of water, hoping that this would aid in me talking normally.
"Sweetheart, you look to be worse for wear that Rainbow Dash herself. I think you're letting this whole ordeal get to your head. I'm worried for you," she told me, evidently concerned.
"I know, I look like a mess. I was going to take a shower before you walk in. But yeah, it's been rough the last couple days."
"Would you like me to come back later?"
I shook my head no. Whatever she wanted to tell me, it was significant enough for her to come out here in the morning, so I wanted to hear it as soon as possible. "I'm curious on what you wanted to tell me."
"Oh yes!" Her voice rose an octave in excitement. "So I've been thinking about the whole ordeal myself, especially the way Rainbow Dash has been so avoidance of you. Now hear me out, I think she suddenly got shy around you."
"So, she's suddenly acting like Fluttershy now?" I deadpanned, which didn't deter her attitude at all
"Even better. Now don't be overly alarmed by what I tell you. I think Rainbow Dash is in love with you."
Naturally, I had gone and taken a drink of water when she told me this, which was a horrible mistake. I spit the water out all over the floor in response. Rarity jumped back in fright, nearly falling off the couch and onto her face.
"WHAT?! ...with me?! Why with me?"
Rarity was taken aback by my sudden reaction. I must have sounded very negative by accident, which wasn't the truth. The right word to describe how I felt was shocked, as I didn't expect this at all. In fact, I wondered why I never considered love to a reason behind why she was acting like that.
"You sound like it's a bad thing," she questioned.
"Not at all, I'm just, not sure what to think right now," I responded.
"Well, whatever you decide to do now, all I can say is that I would give it a chance. Rainbow is one of our closest friends, and I know how much you two enjoy spending time with one another. Even if it doesn't work, isn't the friendship all of us have with one another strong enough to withstand this?"
"I have to admit, you make a good point. But I'm still on the fence as of now. I want to talk to Rainbow Dash before I make a decision like this."
Rarity smiled approvingly. "I understand completely. Do you want to come and stay with me for the time being? It might help you sleep better with all the distractions out of the way."
"No no, I'll be okay. Thanks though."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, trust me I'll be okay," I reassured, a smile forming on my lips for the first time in days.
"Good." She gave me a warm hug of assurance. "Promise me you'll go to sleep tonight?"
I chuckled. "Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."
I still cannot believe I skipped over something as simple and as blatant as love. It should have been one of the first causes I looked at when doing the research. Instead, I went and assumed that Rainbow hated me. Way to overreact to a simple situation Twilight.
However, there was always the chance that Rarity was wrong. I don't have a tally on how many times she's been right or wrong, but I'll safely say that the percentage is over fifty percent at least. This time, she looked as confident as ever in her idea, and I hoped she was just as much right as she was confident.
But even if she was wrong, there was a very slim chance Rainbow was angry with me. I knew from experience, if Rainbow Dash is angry about somepony or something, there was no getting in her way when it came to dealing with it. Frustration and anger are emotions Dash dealt with head on, so if she was annoyed with me, she would have come right up muzzle to muzzle by now. The fact that she was avoiding me in such a manner pretty much debunked this idea completely.
With my mind at ease for the time being, maybe a nap is in order... after gather some more quills, as I just realized I'm running low. I wish everypony would disappear right now, I had no interest in going into public with as little sleep as I've had. Even after the shower I still resembled a zombie pony. Too bad Nightmare Night isn't for awhile, I could definitely use this as an advantage in winning a contest.
-Twilight
June 30th
Time: Present
Location: Not in a Journal
To be a hundred percent honest, I wasn't too happy with the looks I was getting from some of the ponies in town. Apparently my zombie-like form was indeed as bad as I initially feared, as many of them looked at me with expressions of shock, surprise, and worry. What they didn't know, is that under this disheveled appearance I felt better than I have in days.
My mane was the aspect which was causing most of the concerned looks. Despite the numerous attempts I made at brushing it, there were places in which it frizzed and stuck out. It was as if Pinkie Pie took a dozen balloons and rubbed them all over my head, letting the static electricity work its magic.
Despite this, I continued to smile as I walked back to my home. It was nice to have an 800 pound gorilla lifted off your back, even if it you're not certain if the reason for it is sound.
As I neared the library, I could make out a very familiar figure walking past it. Her eyes darting to and from the windows of the building as she proceeded with caution, worried about somepony being inside.
I didn't know if I should hide and wait till Rainbow Dash is ready to come and talk to me face to face, or risk having one of the most awkward meetings ever. I wasn't sure if she was still trying to avoid me like the plague, but from what I just saw, that still is the case.
Instead, I continued walking straight to my home, knowing that eventually I would have to bump into her, whether it be by chance or purpose.
Rainbow Dash saw me, and it startled the pegasus, her wings flaring out to her sides as she started to move in the opposite direction. I was quite confused to see her eyes look right at mine, and as she did so her wings went down. The expression of fear and anxiety she had both times I encountered her last faded away to be replaced with that of... concern? Was she worried about how I looked too?
"Um, Hi Rainbow," I greeted, trying to break the silence.
"Hey Twilight. You know you're mane is all messed up I imagine?" I smiled in her attempt to ask this, as she looked dumbfounded.
"I haven't slept well in days, and I've been really stressed out. But I've been alright otherwise," I lied. One look at my messy bedroom would solidify this fact. I would have to make cleaning that a priority later.
"Do you have a minute? I'd like to ask you about something if you don't mind." It was uncanny just how similar Rainbow's speech pattern sounded to Fluttershy. I wasn't sure if Rarity was joking around when she mentioned that, but apparently she wasn't.
"Of course," I replied, smiling to try and make the situation comfortable. "Come on inside, I'll make some tea for the both of us."
Rainbow Dash went and sat on the couch, her hooves twiddling together as I put a pot of water on to boil. I looked over at her as she sat there, her nervousness still extremely evident in how she handled herself. The way she sat on my couch was how somepony who never has been here before would. In essence, she resembled the posture of a really shy stranger.
I poured a cup for both of us, spooning in sugar for each of us followed by a dollop of milk. Rainbow usually drank tea only when I made it for her for a reason I couldn't fathom. The closest explanation she gave was that I made tea in a way that made it taste "absolutely awesomely delicious." It was easily the best comment I ever received in cooking, if you consider tea making to be that.
"So, whenever you're ready, fire away," I told her, sitting down next to her as I placed her tea on the coffee table in front of her.
"Well first off, what was it that stressed you out this badly?" A seriousness came over her as she asked me this, and I could tell she only wanted completely honest answers.
"Remember those awkward sort of conversations we've had with one another the past two times we met?" She nodded in response. "Well I didn't understand why you were acting that way, so the logical thing I could think of was to try and figure out the cause why. After the first confrontation, I actually arranged an indirect meeting at Rarity's to try and sort it out, but you didn't give me an entire answer, which I don't fault you for not doing."
"Wait, so are you telling me you've lost sleep and put yourself in this sort of state due to me?"
I didn't answer, because I had no idea what to say. One way or another, she was making this lead into her being blamed for everything that's happened. This was the last thing I wanted to do, knowing that she was under her own distress.
"I should have just told you that day, we could have avoided all of this," she said, I could feel the self anger emitting from Rainbow as she placed her head in her hooves. "What if you got sick from all that stress? I mean that could lead to even worse things and soon you're in the hospital with who knows what and..."
"Rainbow!!"
She stopped at the sound of my voice, looking up at me. I swear to Celestia, the pain in her eyes over being the cause of this was causing me a heartache.
"You can't put blame on yourself for this," I pleaded. "I wasn't even going to blame you for anything anyway. I assumed that you were in an emotional state you didn't understand, which resulted in all the events of the past week." Her expression softened as I explained my understanding of everything.
"I know you don't want me to," She replied. "But I have to say that I'm really really sorry about this. I was so confused and had no idea how I wanted to approach this."
I enveloped her into a hug the second she finished her sentence. The warm embrace was welcomed as her arms wrapped around my frame, her head resting on my shoulder for a moment. I let go, keeping my hooves on her shoulders as she stared straight into my eyes. The longer we stayed in this position, the more her anxiety, fear, and any conflicting emotion she had eroded away. "I forgave you awhile ago. Now, I may not be a mind reader, but I know there is a much more pressing matter you wanted to ask me about."
She nodded, taking a deep breath as her eyes closed for the time being. I took my hooves off her and allowed her to take as much time as she needed. At this point, I had no doubt onto what she wanted to say.
"Remember the one time I said I didn't need a colt friend?"
"Yes, you said that you valued your independence far too much to share it with a colt," I replied, smiling at the memory.
"Exactly," she grinned a bit herself at the memory. "But it turned out there was a good reason behind that. Apparently I don't need a colfriend because I was looking at the wrong side of the coin."
"Explain?"
"Well... oh screw it. Twilight, I liked you the first instant I met you, but at the time I didn't realize it. You were really different than most ponies I knew. In fact, you've made me truly appreciate all of the experiences I've had with you since we met."
I was touched by what she was saying, even if I expected some of it. To hear these sorts of things being said about me made me think about how much I succeeded in making the best friends I could, or at this present time, something far beyond.
"But over the past few weeks I had these really, really clear dreams. It felt like I was actually there. And each one was about you in some form. And a week ago I had the clearest one out of them all. It finally dawned on me that there was one pony out there that was awesomer than myself, and I've been staring at her all this time."
I chuckled as the prospect of being more awesome than queen awesome herself. "Are you sure I'm as awesome as you are?"
"Yes. And naturally, the two most awesomest ponies should come together and reign over Ponyville, which by the way, starts... now."
Before I even could react to what was happening, I felt a pair of lips press aggressively into my own as my eyes opened wide in shock. I was frozen on the spot as Rainbow Dash pulled me close, her hooves wrapping around my back as she continued, the kiss working to make me melt into a puddle.
Electricity danced through every nerve in my body as I kissed her back with a matching aggressiveness, our tongues battling with one another like two armies on the front line.
I remember reading a couple of romance novels just for fun one time, especially curious about the kissing scenes. I had my doubts onto if they were as magical as the authors wrote them out to be.
My answer to this question was a resounding yes.
We broke apart in due time, mostly because I enjoyed breathing and didn't feel like passing out. That and I was still exhausted from the lack of sleep.
"Woah..." was the only word that Rainbow could think off as she panted next to me, her body looking as if she underwent a 10 hour luxury spa treatment. Any evidence of stress and emotional turmoil was gone, whisked away into the sky somewhere.
"Now then, I think you have to ask me one question?"
"Oh right! Twilight Sparkle, would you like to be my marefriend?"
Right now, I couldn't make out if my gigantic grin was scary like a clowns, or cute. Judging from Rainbow's expression, it was definitely cute.
"I would love to."
Rainbow pulled me into a warm embrace, nuzzling my neck in approval of my answer. As I laid in her grasp, an odd yet brilliant idea came to me. With that I hopped onto my hooves, and began to drag her upstairs with me, to her befuddlement.
"Come on Rainbow, I want you to do something with me!"
June 30th
Time: 3:00pm
Day: Wednesday
Dear Twilight's Journal,
Hi there! This is Rainbow Dash.
I'm not sure what else to write here, so I guess I'll just write whatever comes to mind. This is sort of hard to do, considering the fact that I have an egghead who is the Princess' pupil breathing down my back. Perfectionists right? Oh boy, she took some offense to that.
Anywho, all I want to write here is that Twilight Sparkle is the greatest, most awesome, and most beautiful pony I have ever encountered in my entire life. Hopefully we get to spend many moons together, with each day being dedicated to spending time together. Well not everyday, I might go insane if I ever have to do math or something.
So with that, Twilight is awesome, so am I, and Equestria needs to be prepared for the greatest one two combo anypony has ever seen.
Oh and Twilight apparently was doing some really hardcore research on what a storm was. Weird, as I wrote that a clap of thunder sounded from outside. Funny, because I don't remember scheduling a storm for today.
All I can say is that thankfully the storm isn't one of us.
-Rainbow Dash