Scent of Roses

by Winston

Part 5

An hour later, Rainbow Dash's hooves led her on, an old familiar innate memory of the walk guiding her through the Jennetstown streets. They led down a main road, until it branched off into a side street, turning left down it and going for a couple of blocks, until another smaller side street came up turning off to the right, between two rows of small buildings on either side crowding towards its edges. She proceeded down this strip for a little while, until a particular sign loomed above one doorway. It was a welcome sight, the same sign she remembered always being there - a wooden arch, painted metallic yellow with peeling and flaking paint long in need of a new coat, bearing the name of the establishment splaying across it in big black block letters.

The Golden Horseshoe.

"You're taking us to this dive bar?" Applejack looked skeptically at the place's exterior of faded, beaten wood siding.

"Dive?" Rainbow Dash put a note of indignance in her voice. "I'll have you know this is among the finest of the drinking establishments frequented by the soldiers of the Equestrian Army during the war."

"If y'all say so." Applejack shrugged.

"And since when are you a connoisseur of upper-class... Uhh... Whatever the upper-class term for a bar is?" Rainbow Dash asked. She turned Rarity. "Help me out here."

"Umm... Bistrot à Vin, perhaps?" The white unicorn offered.

"Yeah, thanks, Rarity." Rainbow Dash nodded. "What she said."

"I'm just kinda surprised, that's all." Applejack replied. "I didn't say there was anything wrong with the place, necessarily."

"Darn right you won't be saying that once you'd tried one of their honeyciders." Rainbow Dash said. "Won't be calling it a dive, either, I'll bet."

"Honey-cider?" Applejack half-closed one eye and looked quizzically at Dash. "Never heard a' that."

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Oh, just come inside." She pushed open the door, holding it for her companions. "After all of you, everypony and griffin."

The group filed in, one by one, and Rainbow Dash let the door go and stepped inside last.

The place was in better shape on the inside than the somewhat rough exterior of the building would have suggested. The wood floor was swept clean and washed. The bar was well-polished, lacquered wood. It was clean and wiped-down, no dirty glasses left out, no napkins or debris littered it. Every table was similarly clean and presentable. Shelves behind the bar held a wide selection of respectable liquors. The lights in the hanging fixtures overhead, surrounded by their green glass shades in the shapes of leaves, cast a pleasant diffuse glow through the whole place.

Still, though, despite the excellent upkeep, the early afternoon wasn't prime business hours for drinking, and the room was mostly empty.

Standing behind the bar was a unicorn mare with a light sandy colored coat. She had a deep golden strawberry blonde colored mane and tail and brilliant emerald green eyes. A white collar and dark forest green bowtie were around her neck, and a cute spray of lighter colored freckles played across her cheeks. Her cutie mark was a bottle set next to a tumbler glass. Rainbow Dash recognized her instantly, and smiled with familiarity as she walked up to the bar. "Sherry!" She exclaimed. "Long time, no see! Still workin' here, huh? Not that I'm surprised..."

The bartender laughed. "Well, it's what I'm good at, what can I say? Got the cutie mark for it an' everything. It's... Uhh... Don't tell me... Been a while but I remember you..." She cocked her head slightly and rolled her eyes upward, thoughtfully, and tapped one forehoof on the floor. "Smash... Bash... No... Somethin' like that..." She mumbled quietly. "Dash!" She finally said, more loudly. "That's it. Rainbow Dash, with the crazy rainbow mane!"

"The one and only!" Rainbow Dash grinned and nodded.

"Didn't you used to come in with that white mare all the time?" Sherry asked.

The smile partly faded from Rainbow Dash's face. "Yeah..." She agreed. "I did... Once upon a time, I guess."

"Oh. Things changed, huh?" Sherry ventured with a little shrug. "Sorry."

"Guess that's a way to look at it." Rainbow Dash shrugged back.

"Yeah, breakups suck, huh?" Sherry said.

"Ehh... It wasn't exactly a - " Rainbow Dash started, sounding slightly embarassed.

"But I guess you got plenty of friends here with you now, though." Sherry continued, unintentionally interrupting.

"Uhhh... Yeah. Brought 'em in all the way from Ponyville." Rainbow Dash nodded, more than happy to just let the subject change. "This is Twilight Sparkle... Fluttershy... Pinkie Pie... Rarity... Applejack..." Dash introduced the ponies all by name, one by one. "And this is Gilda." She introduced the griffin, who'd been hanging towards the back of the group.

"Wow." Sherry the bartender was taken aback a little. "I haven't seen a griffin in here in... Jeeze. Years."

"Guess the whole war thing kinda put a cramp on that." Gilda said dryly.

"Sure did!" Sherry said. "You know... Not... That you're not welcome in here, or anything." She said awkwardly. "'Cause you are. Nice to meet you."

"Yeah. You too." Gilda nodded.

"So what can I get you girls?" Sherry asked, getting down to business at last.

"A round of honeyciders for all of us!" Rainbow Dash immediately said. "I gotta have all my friends try one, as long as we're in town."

"Ah. Good taste, this one." Sherry nodded. "You girls ever had a honeycider before?" She asked, looking at the group.

"No..." They all answered, one by one, after looking around at each other uncertainly.

"Trick question! Of course you haven't. It's the house specialty drink. Nopony else makes it... 'Least, not as good, if they try." Sherry said, proudly. "You're gonna love it." She got out seven heavy glass mugs, setting them in a row on the bar. "See, it's like a plain apple cider, to start with... Fermented with yeast 'till it's what you'd call pretty hard. 'Bout eight percent alcohol or so." She began filling the mugs one by one from a tap. "Then we add our mix of spices... Seasonings... And set it back out in the barrel to age." The mugs, as they filled with a golden brown, slighly cloudy liquid with a pale frothy head, were set back in a line on the bar. "And at the same time, we ferment some honey and water. Makes a nice sweet mead." The mugs kept lining up. "Then when they're both ready, we mix juuuuuust the right amounts together, along with some fresh honey, a few more spices... Blend it up for the right balance of taste... And BAM!" She thumped down the last mug in the row. "You've got honeycider!"

Sherry beamed from behind the row of mugs, proud of her showmareship. It was pretty good, Rainbow Dash found herself smiling. Those mugs and the drink they were filled with brought back memories. They looked delicious. She could practically hear one of them calling her name.

"Well, what are you all waiting for?" Rainbow Dash grabbed a mug from the end of the row for herself. "Help yourselves!"

All the rest of the ponies, and Gilda, took a mug at her prompting. They looked at them, cautiously, tentatively, unfamiliar with the contents.

"Shouldn't we, uh, drink ta... Somethin'?" Applejack suggested, peering down into the foam atop hers.

"Sure, if you want." Rainbow Dash agreed. "How 'bout to... Uh..." She tried to think of something meaningful to all of them.

"To the friends who can't be here." Twilight Sparkle suddenly interjected.

Applejack smiled and gave Twilight a little nod. "Sure, sugarcube. That'll do. To the friends who can't be here right now." She raised her mug a little. All the rest of them did the same, following her lead. With that, they all drank.

As she tipped her heavy mug up, the unique drink inside crossed Rainbow Dash's lips and flooded her tongue with a taste that had an old familiarity unrecalled for a long time. It was delicious, amazing, as it always had been... The taste of apple cider sugared with the sheer sweetness of honey, and the added notes of spices... Cinnamon spiked, just a touch of cloves, something suggesting citrus peel... Some other flavors that were hard to put a hoof on... Ingredients that Sherry would never in a million years divulge, anyway. It all came together incredibly.

After a heavy draught, gulping down at least a third of the liquid in one long, slow, savoring pull, Dash slowly lowered her mug.

The mug lowered, clearing her visual field once again. In her mind's eye, she could see it - the lights were different, it was dark outside, no sun coming in through the windows. A gentle cacophony of voices and music, the usual thick sound of an evening crowd at the Golden Horseshoe, filled the air, infusing the environment with a busy, energetic feeling. Suddenly another mug, emptied of its contents, slammed down on the bar next to Rainbow Dash. "Ha! All down in one shot!" The familiar voice of a female pony exclaimed proudly. "Told ya I could!"

"Easy there, killer." Rainbow Dash admonished, looking over. Alabaster was standing next to her, hoof still inside the handle of the mug she'd just drained. "You tryin' to make yourself hurl or something?"

"You're just jealous I beat you!" Alabaster grinned back at Dash. "And when was the last time I ever threw up, anyway?"

"I dunno..." Dash conceded. "Flight school, I guess? The corkscrew thing we had to do that one time?"

"You threw up too. We all did." Alabaster pointed out. "It was a pretty terrible day..."

"Oh yeah." Rainbow Dash laughed.

"But you know what?" Dash said, peering into her own still partially full mug. "Honeycider is a drink you enjoy, not just slam down... And I still have same left to enjoy and you're all out. And there's nothin' you can do about it! So HA!" She taunted her friend.

"That's not true!" Alabaster shot back. "I... Can buy another one!"

"Yeah?" Dash glanced at Alabaster and raised one eyebrow.

"Yeah!" Alabaster affirmed. "Uhh... Except that... I've already had two... And we still gotta get all the way back to camp... So... I'd... Better not." She said, lamely, and hung her head a little.

"Oh, responsibility..." Dash shook her head. "Is there a good time it can't wreck?"

"Eh, it's alright." Alabaster shrugged. "A hangover isn't exactly a good time anyway."

"Ugh... Fact." Dash agreed. She stared into her own mug, down into the remaining liquid, and gently swirled it around a couple times, watching the slow sloshing.

"... Sure is sweet, alright." Applejack's voice drifted into Rainbow Dash's ear, tugging her gently out of her memories, away from the nighttime crowd of those years ago, drinking with Alabaster, and back into the present day mid-afternoon. "But they use good apples, I can taste 'em. And the spices really give it somethin' special. Hate ta admit it, but... Even compared to the Apple family cider, this stuff's pretty amazin'."

"Oh, quite incredible, indeed." Rarity agreed with Applejack's assessment. "I do wonder how many calories come with this kind of incredible, however. I suspect it can't be a light number."

"Actually, Rarity..." Rainbow Dash began, looking up from her mug again, "That's part of why a lot of Combat Fliers came to this bar and made honeycider their drink of choice. Aside from the amazing taste, we kinda needed as many calories as we could get."

"You what?" Rarity had a skeptical look of disbelief.

"Yeah, I know. Some ponies struggle to keep weight off. We had to struggle to keep enough on sometimes." Rainbow Dash said. "Pegasi who do a lot of high-intensity flying for a long time burn through a lot of energy. Sometimes, their body tries to react by dropping muscle mass to lighten itself, especially if they already don't have a lot of fat to burn off. But we didn't want to let that happen because we still had to be able to stay in shape for ground fighting, too, and you need the muscle and strength in your legs for that. Only solution, really, is to stuff your face 'till your body's convinced it has all the energy it needs."

"So... You... Eat whatever you want, no matter how ridiculously fattening it would be to most other ponies, and it's a good thing?" Rarity asked.

"Not like that isn't pretty much how I've always done things, but yeah." Rainbow Dash nodded.

"Must... Control... Jealously..." Rarity said, through clenched teeth. "Must... Not... Hurt... Friend..."

"Yeah, I've been known to get that reaction." Rainbow Dash said. "But trust me, it's a lot less of a good deal than you think. It only works if you're burning those calories. That kind of privilege comes with a price."

"You should see her at sugarcube corner recharging after a looong day of flying." Pinkie Pie laughed. "It's a show! Dashie, the amazing bottomless pit!"

"Hah, well, I know whatcha mean. Big Macintosh gets like that durin' the harvest season when the work's the longest and hardest, too." Applejack nodded. "Sometimes I wonder, when ya balance out how much he harvests in a day to how much he can eat, if we do any better than just break even."

Twilight was a distance away, not really paying attention to the conversing of the others. She flagged Sherry over to where she was at the bar. "This is really good. But... I'm sorry, I'm just not really in the mood for sweet. I think I feel like something... Like, uh..." She looked up and scanned the shelves behind the bar. "How 'bout that one?" She pointed one forehoof at a particular bottle, square shaped, filled with an amber liquid. "That one's a pretty good whiskey. At least that's what I hear. Some of that."

"Sure thing." Sherry nodded. "You want that neat or on the rocks?"

"No ice." Twilight shook her head.

"You got it." Sherry poured the drink and set it down in front of Twilight.

Horn slightly glowing, Twilight levitated the glass gently, swirling the whiskey, and she breathed in the aroma of the liquor. "To the friends who can't be here." She said, quietly, sullenly, before lifting the glass up and sipping on it.

Rainbow Dash, after breaking away from the rest of the group, walked up to the bar next to Twilight, who barely looked over to acknowledge her presence. She was focusing instead on the drink in front of her, examining it, pondering every aspect of the liquid and the glass it was in.

She looked like she was on the verge of saying something, mouth opening to speak. But she didn't. She just sighed and kept staring forlornly at her whiskey.

"It's really getting to you, isn't it?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly.

Twilight didn't answer for several seconds. "Guess so." She finally mumbled. "I... It just... I dunno. Forget it. I'll be fine."

Rainbow Dash reached up with a foreleg and rubbed Twilight briefly on the shoulder. "Hey... I'm sorry. I know it's not an easy thing to feel." She said. "But don't try to cover it up, Twilight. Some of the good times me and Alabaster had together were here in this bar. That's why I wanted to come here, to have a drink and remember the good things... But be careful. I've told you about the mistakes I made after she died, trying to make it work the other way around instead. Don't do what I did. Don't try to drink to replace feeling with being numb. Don't try to drink to forget. Doesn't help. Know what I mean?"

"Right." Twilight nodded. She stared down at the woodgrain of the bar for a few seconds, then, finally, looked up at Rainbow Dash. "Yeah, I know what you mean. And... And I won't, I'll be okay..." She said. "It's just more the surprise than anything, you know? I'd never even heard anything about her after I left. I had no idea."

"I know, Twi." Rainbow Dash said softly. "I know. It... Just... It sucks. I know."

"There's nothing you can do about it, is there?" Twilight asked, with a sigh.

"Just time, Twilight." Rainbow Dash said. "Just time. That's about it. And if you need to talk to somepony about it... Do it. I'm here for that, if you ever want to. Don't forget."

"I suppose you would be the pony for it." Twilight nodded.

Twilight sat there, taking a couple of slow, small thoughtful sips over the next minute or two.

"You know, Moondancer, she wanted to know how to make Equestria a better place." Twilight said. "I think that's why she went. I think it's why she wanted to be an officer in the unicorn corps. She always wanted to understand how to lead ponies. That was what she thought was important, figuring out how to get us all to work together to make big things happen."

"I'm sure she was good at it." Rainbow Dash said. "They don't make you an officer if you're not."

"She was." Twilight nodded. "She was a natural organizer. It's why her parties always had a reputation for being successes. I just wish... That I'd ever showed up to one."

"You can't change it." Rainbow Dash shrugged. "So don't beat yourself up."

"I know." Twilight sipped her drink. "It just kinda hurts to realize these things retrospectively, that's all."

"Yeah." Rainbow Dash nodded.

"It just feels like seeing those gravestones gave me a good hard kick in the side and I'm going to be bruised for a while." Twilight said.

"Well..." Rainbow Dash thought for a second. "Bruises don't last forever. That ache will die down eventually."

"I'll be glad to get home." Twilight said. "Where I won't have to think about places and things like this for a while. I think that'll help."

"You and me both, Twilight." Rainbow Dash nodded. "I'm looking forward to seeing this fade into the distance again. I'm ready to let it go, out of my life. That's about all I want now."

"Good thing it'll be time to catch the train soon, then, isn't it?" Twilight smiled a little bit.

"I can't wait!" Rainbow Dash laughed a little bit and smiled back.

Late at night, in much the same way it was on the ride out, Rainbow Dash was sitting in the dark, alone, in a car that was quiet except for the constant soft background noise the train made as it rolled along. Faint moonlight illuminated the features of the land, the rocks and the trees and fields, glimmering off the dewdrops that formed from the chilled night air, just barely enough to see the world rushing by.

It was calming. The blanket of night brought a silent peace to the land they were passing through. For the first time in a long while, Rainbow Dash felt like a part of that peace herself.

She was alone for a long time, enjoying that feeling, enjoying the night, until, to her slight surprise, she heard the quiet hoofsteps of another pony approaching. She'd thought all the others were long asleep.

Turning to look, she could tell in the dim light that the other pony was Twilight Sparkle.

"Hey Twi." Rainbow Dash said softly as the other pony neared.

"Oh!" Twilight was briefly surprised. "I didn't think you'd still be up."

"You couldn't sleep either, huh?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"No. I tried to, for a while, but... I suppose not." Twilight said, while moving into the seat next to Rainbow Dash.

"You're not still thinking about it, are you?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I guess so." Twilight admitted. "A little."

"Well... That's only natural, really." Rainbow Dash replied with a shrug.

"It's made me think more about something else, though." Twilight said.

"Yeah? What's that?" Rainbow asked.

"I think it's made me realize that... I... Maybe I kind of owe you an apology, Rainbow." Twilight said.

"What?" Rainbow Dash was surprised. "How could you possibly have anything to apologize for after everything you've done for me as my friend, Twilight?"

"Because I keep thinking about how I felt, and how... Unfamiliar it was... How I wasn't able to understand before. I thought I did, but it..." Twilight shook her head. "It wasn't enough. It wasn't as much as you deserved."

"You did as much as you could, Twi. I know that." Rainbow Dash said. "That's all that matters."

"Yes, but it just feels different now." Twilight shook her head. "I kind of... See it in a new way. Now I know what I was missing."

"So... what changed?" Rainbow Dash asked curiously.

"I've never been shaken like that, Rainbow. I've been... Just... Lucky, until now." Twilight said. "I've never really lost somepony I knew. So I guess I never understood what this has been like for you. I still don't, not as strongly as you must. Moondancer wasn't somepony that close to me, not like I can see now that Alabaster was to you. But it still feels... Well, like you said the other night. Like there's something missing now, like there's a piece gone. Now I understand that feeling. I'm so sorry. If I'd really, truly known what this was like, maybe I could have helped you more before now. I feel like all I could do was listen and nod my head. I couldn't really say anything 'cause I couldn't feel it, you know?"

"That's alright, Twilight." Rainbow Dash said. "The truth is... Well, it's like this. There's good days and there's bad days. That's life, you know? There'll always be ups and downs. All in all, though, the last five years haven't been too bad. It's been mostly good days. I've been happy, Twilight. I really haven't been suffering. You don't need to worry about that. And the biggest part of that has been because of you guys. You've helped me more than I think any of you realizes, just by being my friends. Just by being around. That's all I could ever ask any of you for. There's no way to magically erase the things that happened in the past and take away all the scars, and I don't expect that from anypony. Bad days are just gonna happen sometimes. It's the price I know I have to pay for what I had to do. That's okay. I mean it, really, I'm okay."

"Why?" Twilight asked. "When we talked about this, a long time ago, it sounded like you'd been getting it all pretty well under control."

"Mostly, yeah. Some kinds of hurt, you can get over just by thinking them through, realizing you don't have to hold on to them. Sometimes it's not always so easy. But I guess it can fool you. Sometimes you can feel alright even though there's still something you need to take care of." Rainbow Dash said. "It's like a splinter stuck inside of you. You can get so used to it just being there after a while that you don't really notice it anymore. But it's still there. Just thinking about it isn't enough. You gotta do something about it to really make it go away. You gotta finally just pull it out. I didn't realize that so completely until now... It was hard, but... I'm glad in a way that I had this kind of 'bad day', because now this particular one is finally over for good. I won't have it again, not like before. When I used to think of Alabaster, I used to smell blood, Twilight. I used to smell the blood, the war, the death... The bad things that happened out here, the bad things we saw and had to do together. And all I could feel was sad, and angry, and how much I still miss her. But thinking about her now... It's not like that anymore. Now I smell those roses I left at her memorial, the kind she loved because in her heart she was gentle and beautiful. And that's all. It's finally over. I finally... Have a happy memory of her, the kind of way she deserves to be remembered. I'm glad I ended up having to come back here."

"I think you have a lot of courage to have done that." Twilight Sparkle said. "I... Wish I had as much."

"Nah." Rainbow Dash shook her head with a modest smile. "If I had courage, I woulda done it a long time ago, when I should have just gotten it over with. In the end it wasn't a matter of courage, it was a matter of not having a choice."

"But you did have a choice." Twilight said.

"Not really. My friend needed me." Rainbow Dash shrugged. "I had to help Gilda. I had to protect her. Loyalty. I'm the shield, remember?"

"I wish you wouldn't think like that." Twilight Sparkle said, slightly unhappily.

"It's what I am." Rainbow Dash said. "How am I supposed to pretend I'm something else? I can't live like that... We have to accept what we are, Twi. That means accepting what other ponies are, too. I know it's hard. It's hard for me, too, sometimes." She smiled wryly. "Like Applejack, she drives me crazy 'cause of who she is sometimes. But I can't change her. And I wouldn't want to. She's gotta be who she's gotta be, even if it means we get into a fight once in a while. We're always still friends when the dust settles."

Twilight looked comtemplative, but said nothing. Silence settled between the two of them for a while.

"It'll be alright, Twilight." Rainbow Dash finally said. She raised her foreleg and put it around Twilight's shoulders, trying to be comforting. "I know what you're worried about, what I told you a long time ago about me being first... But don't. Everything will be alright."

Twilight looking down at the floor. "Yeah." She said quietly.

After a few seconds, Twilight turned and pulled Rainbow Dash into a gentle hug. She laid the side of her head on Dash's shoulder. Dash reached out with both forelimbs and held her.

"I don't want you to leave us." Twilight Sparkle said softly.

"Not for a long, long time, Twi." Rainbow Dash replied.

"Not ever." Twilight shook her head.

"Nopony lives forever." Rainbow Dash spoke softly.

Twilight didn't answer, she only sighed and hugged Dash a little bit tighter.

Rainbow Dash just held Twilight for a few minutes. "Thanks for coming with me." She finally said. "I know I wanted to say no at first, but... Now after it's said and done, I'm glad you were all here."

"I love you." Twilight whispered. "We all do."

"I love you too." Rainbow Dash whispered back.

Gradually, in the quiet peace of the embracing darkness, the two of them fell asleep together as the train carried them home.

For Nicole. I don't know how I could have made it through the worst times if you hadn't been there for me. Friendship truly is magic.