//------------------------------// // Then Comes the Smack-Down // Story: Snapple Pie // by RavensDagger //------------------------------// It was a few days later, and I was facing down Diamond Tiara while Silver Spoon was watching her rear. Her hoof jammed itself into my chest and poked the air out of my lungs with a squeak like that of a deflating balloon. “Do you remember me?” the pink mare asked, grinning from ear to ear while her brow twitched down and almost climbed onto the bridge of her nose. She looked a little mad. And, truth be told, her question was a little silly. Looking at the grassy ground below us, I called back the first memory I had of her, back during our first years in Miss Cheerilee’s class, her walking with her daddy. Her growing friendship with Silver Spoon and how she suddenly became a meany. Yup, I did remember her, very well. “Yeah, I remember you.” She blinked at me, then looked behind her. For a moment I thought she was gazing across the wild savanna of the busy streets of Ponyville, where mares and stallions of all sizes were trotting around the markets. It was a nice day, I guess. The sun was out and the air smelled like fresh daisies and trash, but that could have been the mush pile at my hooves. Silver Spoon tucked her head into the alleyway, her greyish body still hidden from sight. So that’s what she was looking for, I thought. “Silver,” Diamond whispered. “Come on over here, quick. If we’re fast, we can teach him a good lesson and then get going. You know, for insulting yo— us the other day.” It was my turn to pinch my brows together as I tried to figure out what was going on. I didn’t remember insulting them in the last few days. Let alone the other day. “Did I say something silly again? I don’t think I meant to,” I said in my defense. “But my mom’s always telling me that my hoof drags itself into my mouth.” My mind froze for a moment, imagining my soaking and stinky hoof in my mouth. “Actually, if my hoof had been in my mouth, I wouldn’t have hurt your feelings,” I mused. She thumped a hoof against my chest again. It hurt a little more this time. As I kneeled over and tried to catch my breath (which is also a silly saying—you can’t catch a breath), I saw Silver Spoon’s eyes widen, then she looked away, setting her jaw as she gave all sorts of weird looks at the brick walls around us. “Diamond,” she said. “I don’t know if this is a good idea....” “Oh, don’t worry. He just needs a little... adjusting. I can’t let him get away with insulting you, now can I?” Diamond Tiara’s hoof dug a furrow in the dirt not too far from where my muzzle lay, squished against the gravel road. It’s about then that you showed up, right when I was trying to find a way outta there and wondering about how similar that track was to that left by a snail. But, those thoughts evaporated as I saw you. The sun was softly hugging your yellow coat, adding a brilliance to you that I’d never seen in any other mare before. Your eyes, though hidden by your crimson mane, were nothing but two pits of malice. A growl resonated from deep within your throat and as you lifted your head the light of day caught onto the orange of your irises. “What in tarnation are ya doin’?” Your voice echoed into the alley, its strength diminished by the cracky, breaking tone that you suffered from. Diamond Tiara decided to give up on me, choosing rather to stand in the middle of the corridor and stomp a hoof at the ground. “Oh, puh-lease. Did you have to come here?” “Naw, Ah didn’t have ta, but Ah sure as apples won’t let you hurt some innocent pony just ‘cause ya can.” Your eyes shifted from Diamond Tiara and landed on my own. You blinked, trying to figure out just what had happened to me before the anger shifted away and was slowly replaced by pity. It was sorta cute, coming from you. Silver Spoon took a few halting steps, placing herself between you and Diamond Tiara, also effectively cutting our view of one another. “DT, can we just go? We could visit my place? Or pass by the arcade? I don’t want to—” “Come on, Silver. We can take that ugly stack of muscles on. She’s just acting tough.” Diamond Tiara’s face contorted into a cruel smear. “If she so much as touches me I’ll go off and... well, she’s going to regret it.” “No, you don’t understand, DT, I really don’t want t—” You slid into the shadows bold as day and huffed loud enough to cut Silver Spoon off. “Move it, Silver. Ah don’t wanna hurt nopony. Just let Snails off and never bug ‘im again. It ain’t hard ta have fun when ye’re leadin’ a decent sort o’ life.” “Decent life?” Diamond's voice squeaked. “Who do you think I am? You’re just some ungrateful yokel that lives in a broken down barn and smashes her skull into trees for a living. You don’t know anything about proper, civilised living. Don’t you dare talk to me about decency when you and your coltfriend here have evidently not taken a bath in months!” If you had sleeves, you would have been rolling them up. Silver Spoon sighed, shaking her head as she walked around Diamond Tiara and deeper into the alley. “Apple Bloom,” she said over her shoulder. “Let it drop, all right? Tiara’s a little nervous an—” “Nervous?! I’m only nervous because of her!” The pink filly pointed at you accusingly, the same hoof that had been jammed into my chest moments ago. You took another step, the gravel crunching as your muscular legs pushed down. For my part, I decided to look at the sky. There were some birds and a few wispy clouds, all peaceful and tranquil. Even the sound of the market with the ponies calling their attention to their wares was nicer than the alley —I could hear Applejack hawking some apples still. “Snails, get up. We can take ‘em down if we work together,” you said, eyeing them down suspiciously as you took another step. “I can’t hit a filly.” Three sets of eyes landed on me, wearing expressions between contempt and bewilderment... and there are lots of expressions between those two. “I-it’s true. Hurting a filly would make me feel bad.” “Well, that’s sorta admirable, Snails, but last Ah looked you were gettin’ beat on by a filly,” you explained, waving the tip of your hoof between Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. “Maybe you should defend yerself a little. Ah can’t be around all the time t’ scare ‘em off.” “Scare us off?” Diamond said. She took a few steps towards me and shoved me back down as I was trying to stand. With an oomph I crashed back down, a few stars shimmering in my sight before popping out of existence. They were rather pretty, actually. “Who do you think is afraid of you, cowpatty? You stink of apples, you-you lamekin!” From the corner of my vision, I saw Silver Spoon heave in a breath, almost like she was trying not to sob. “Diamond, stop it. Let’s go, now.” “Ah ain’t lettin’ nopony go nowhere!” you said. “Try to stop me,” Diamond Tiara growled back. I had lots of time to think. I usually thought a lot. Still do, I guess. Sometimes things crawl along and I have time to just sit there and see. Sometimes things go by quickly, and I don’t have time to understand what it is that I’m seeing. Like a snail tipping forwards, you began to drop down, all your weight (not that you weigh much, that’s not what I said) pushed down on your front hooves and then your muscles pumped. In a moment, you were airborne, charging ahead with only a fearsome glower to plow through your adversary, accompanied by a high-pitched battle cry that belonged on playgrounds, not in alleyways. Diamond Tiara tried her best, but all she did was crouch down and grimace as her eyes shut and you approached. “Silver, run!” she screamed in a raw, hoarse voice. You collided with the force of a train meeting a brick wall. A really small train with a bow. “Don’t you dare insult mah fam’ly!” “Oh, I’ll dare much more than that, apple-picker!” Both you and Diamond Tiara rolled back, grunting as dirt and stagnant water splashed all over the place, and you twisted in the muck trying to grab at one another. Silver Spoon screamed at the top of her lungs, closing her eyes to hide the scene. I was contemplating closing my own eyes when a pair of blue tendrils whipped by me and wrapped themselves around both of the fillies on the ground. With a magical yank the loops rose up, levitating the pair of squabbling young mares into the air. “Tsk tsk, look at you. Such a mess. You should be ashamed.” Standing tall and very proudly in the entrance was a white unicorn, her horn glowing that same particular shade of blue as the rings surrounding Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom. “Let me go!” the pink filly screamed. “Lemme at ‘er!” you demanded. The mare in the alley’s entrance stepped in, her lips curving up in disgust as she stepped around the mud. “I’ll do no such thing until you two agree with one another. In the meantime, could somepony please tell me what has caused such a... spat?” Miss Rarity’s gaze went from the you, to Silver Spoon, then to me. Her piercing eyes narrowed and both of us gulped. I knew, then, that you weren't really prepared for this. Your valiant rescue was not pushed along by some plan or fraught with well-thought-out contingencies. You were just trying to help a friend. My heart swelled up and I pushed myself up off of the ground, opening my mouth to speak. Silver Spoon spoke first, pressing a hoof against your shoulder as she did so. “We’re sorry, Miss Rarity. It’s our fault, Diamond Tiara and I.” The filly cast her eyes to the ground and numbly let go of you. “W-we were trying to have fun, I guess, but i-it wasn’t the best of funs.” “What do you mean? We didn’t start it! They did!” Diamond Tiara managed to say, swiping at the air viciously. You cringed as her flailing hoof brushed past your muzzle. “Silver Spoon is wrong, miss. They’re the mean ones.” Arching an eyebrow up, Rarity looked to you. “Do you have anything to say for yourself, Apple Bloom? Your sister’s going to be incredibly disappointed if this is true.” “Ah ain’t got nothin’ t’ say about these two bullies!” you said. With a huff, you folded your hooves and pouted, your lips bulging out comically. The situation, you knew, was getting worse. Rarity was about to let them go, scot free, then she was going to talk to Applejack. It was going to be a long night at home, trying to explain the situation away. “Um, can I say something?” I asked, my forehoof raised up as if we were still in class. “Why, yes, of course you can, Snails. But please do so quickly; I’m afraid that if I remain here the stench will rub off on my coat. It’s ruined now.” I blinked a few times, the gears in my head clicking too loudly for me to think until they thumped into place. “I’ve been thinking,” I began, ignoring the roll of Diamond Tiara’s eyes. “And I think I know what’s wrong, sorta. Diamond Tiara is being really mean because school is finished, and the only way she knows how to have fun is to hurt others. I think she likes the attention, but mostly the attention that Silver Spoon gives her. Meanwhile, Silver Spoon is sad because she doesn’t like hurting ponies and was probably bullied because she’s a bully. But she likes Diamond Tiara and still wants to be her friend while changing her. And Apple Bloom just doesn’t like seeing ponies get hurt for silly reasons... she’s actually really nice about that, but a little too violent to solve the problems.” You stared at me, hardly registering that your hooves had touched the ground while your jaw tried not to drop out of its place. The expressions worn by those around us were similar, not that I found myself able to pay them that much attention. Your eyes were on me, and for the second time I was beginning to notice just how pretty they were. You had saved me, twice. You’d been willing to hurt yourself for me—a pony that most people ignored or thought of as silly—and you treated me like a friend, as if we had something in common. The gears were starting to turn again and somehow, the friction of them were making my face redden. “Y-you might be right,” Silver Spoon said. “But that doesn’t excuse the fact that you’re wrong. Come on Diamond, let’s just go, please?” She pulled away from you while tugging at Diamond Tiara with her eyes. The pink filly seemed indecisive, jerking her glances between you and the quickly retreating Silver Spoon. “I’m going to tell my Daddy on you. You’d better watch out,” she said before turning tail and galloping after her friend. As we sighed and contemplated the quiet and peace that seemed to fill the alley, Miss Rarity decided to up and leave. “Well, that proved... interesting. Apple Bloom, I cannot find it in my heart to talk to Applejack about this... incident. Still, you were doing it for a good cause, and it would hurt me to see you punished for trying to help your coltfriend. I’ll be as accurate as I can when I tell her.” The dainty mare exited the alley as well, shuddering in relief as the smell of the passageway washed off of her. “He’s not mah coltfriend!” you cried out after her, your voice weakening as you realised mid-sentence that it was futile. “So, uh,” I began, trying to fill the silence. “Thanks for all that, again.” Without me telling it to, my hoof climbed up and began scratching at the nape of my neck. “I appreciate it, most ponies don’t stick their necks out for me, especially not twice.” You shrugged off my remark, your own forehoof rubbing against your shin. “T’was nothin’...?” “It was not nothing!” I protested, slamming at the ground and splashing in a puddle of mud. “You did a lot for me, and I have to repay you. C-could I get you lunch?” We blinked in unison, you trying to decipher what I had said, and me trying to decipher if I had really said that. “Uh, if you want, or something.” I swallowed hard, plagued by a thick uncertainty that came out of nowhere. You didn’t seem to be faring any better. “We could go to Sugarcube Corner?” I said, thinking fast. It was open, public, and safe. Nothing bad would happen there, right? “Um, well, um, thank you?” you stuttered. “But, Sugarcube Corner’s... well, Ah mean.... Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo won’t be able t’ crusade tomorrow. And Ah wanted ta fix the clubhouse a lil’ bit. Maybe you could bring something there, maybe?” My mouth felt like it had been filled with a cotton ball (something that I don’t suggest that anypony tries; the little hairs stay stuck everywhere). “Uh-kay. Sure. Thanks, and see you tomorrow?” Blinking at each other, we both walked away on stiff limbs, our minds swimming in the same mire of confusion and questioning as we marched out of the alley and into the sunlight. Snails smiled, remembering a particular batch of queasy nostalgia that followed the events he had discussed. Meanwhile, Twilight was putting the finishing touches to her work. “Wow, this information is rather odd. It’s going to take some time to correlate it all,” she said. “But I think I can do it.” The librarian perused her notes, her sharp eyes sliding down the page and taking in loads of information. Apple Bloom and Snails acted like two shy foals, glancing at one another and blushing as they recalled the next few scenes of their tale. Twilight interrupted the rumination. “I noticed something. In both of your stories so far, neither one of you seems to point to feeling... in love or attracted with the other. I mean, the subtext points to you being friends, but there’s no full connection yet. Is this normal?” Apple Bloom raised to the task of answering. “Ah think it is. At first we were friends, then we were friendlier, then we started likin’ each other and dependin’ on one another.” “Um, it was a little different for me,” Snails admitted. He shifted in his seat and stared at the ground in thought. “I think I liked Apple bloom way before all that. I just didn’t know what to do about it.” The alicorn nodded and hummed an off tune, then looked over to Apple Bloom. “Would you mind telling me when it actually... started, for you?” “Ah think Ah know when it happened....”