//------------------------------// // Twilight's Steamy Buns // Story: Pagemaster/Nathan Quickfic Collection // by Nathan //------------------------------// Twilight’s Steamy Buns A cacophony of clattering pots and pans echoed from the kitchen in Sugar Cube Corner, followed by the loud (and rather unlady like) curses of a certain unicorn. “Oh Twilight, it’s not that bad.” Pinkie Pie began to gather up the fallen pans, twirling them expertly and sliding them neatly into their proper places. “Pinkie, I’m pretty sure key lime pie isn’t supposed to be red. With yellow polka dots.” Twilight used her magic to gather up some flour that had spilled from a nearby bag. Curiously enough, the bag was wearing a party hat but Twilight chose not to inquire. “It doesn’t matter what the pie looks like, silly. Only what it tastes like!” Pinkie Pie bent down and licked some of the pie’s filling from the floor. “Mmmmmmm… delish!” “Does it taste like lime?” “Nope, but it’s still good!” With her face plastered to the floor, Pinkie vacuumed up the spilt remains of the pie. Straightening suddenly, a quizzical look appeared on her face again. “Hmm… maybe a meringue is too hard for a beginner like you. We should try something simpler! All you have to do is take a cup of flou—“ Twilight firmly shoved her hoof in Pinkie’s mouth. “No, Pinkie. No cupcakes. Why can’t we try something other than a dessert? Perhaps a shortbread, or something?” “That’s a great idea! We can make buns!” “Buns?” Pinkie Pie nodded enthusiastically and began hopping around the kitchen haphazardly, nearly undoing all the hard work they had just put in cleaning the place up. “There’s been a really high demand for them lately! Or at least I think there is. Rainbow Dash is always telling me how she would like to get a taste of my hot buns. Oh! Can we, Twilight? Canwecanwecanwe, pleeeeeeeeeeeeease?” Twilight’s mind had been off chasing exactly what Rainbow Dash may have meant by that but she managed to shake herself back to the present. “Sure, why not? I’ll just head back to my library and see if I can find a good reci—“ “Don’t be silly, Twilight!” Pinkie Pie grabbed her and pulled her back into the kitchen. “You don’t need a silly book to cook!” “But isn’t that what they invented cookbooks for?” Twilight glanced around nervously. “Only amateurs use cookbooks!” Pinkie proclaimed from the door to the pantry. “You wait right there!” Twilight considered pointing out that she was an amateur when it came to cooking, but it probably wouldn’t do her any good. Once Pinkie got going on something it was hard to put a stop to her momentum. “Cooking these buns will be a snap!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed upon emerging from the pantry. “What could possibly go wrong?” Sighing, Twilight consigned herself to blindly following whatever instruction she was given. She had no idea what she was doing and, as strange as it may seem, the kitchen was the one place she felt she could place her absolute trust in Pinkie Pie to know what she was doing. Flour, yeast, salt, eggs, milk. All the ingredients were brought forth in their measure and added to the gooey concoction that was the dough. When Pinkie Pie had determined the dough to be sufficiently mixed, she ordered Twilight to dump it onto the wood countertop. “Now stick your hooves in it!” Twilight gave the earth pony a flat stare. “Excuse me?” “You can’t just want to bake bread, Twilight. You have to knead it! So get kneading!” Sighing, Twilight reached forward to stick her hooves in the lump of dough. “Wait!” cried Pinkie Pie, sticking a pan of flour between Twilight and the dough. Twilight’s hooves struck the pan, sending it clattering to the ground. “Oh great, one more mess to clean up.” She looked back towards Pinkie. “Care to explain what that was about?” Pinkie Pie shrugged and trotted off to get the oven heated. “You were about to have a sticky situation on your hooves. I helped out.” Planting her flour-coated hooves in the dough, Twilight began to work it. It was strangely calming, feeling the pliable mass stretch and form beneath her touch. Twilight allowed her eyes to close and for a while she just sat there, feeling the dough. “Uh Twilight, I think you can be done kneading now.” Pinkie Pie had returned from the ovens and was starring at the lump on the counter. Its texture had become smoother and the dough as a whole had somewhat flattened under her touch. Pinkie extended a rolling pin and indicated what Twilight was to do with it. Bending over the counter, Twilight rolled the dough as flat as she could (“The yeast will make them get big!” Pinkie had told her), forming it into a rough rectangle. Using a special cutter they had found in a drawer, she stamped out circles of dough to be placed on the cooking sheet. Gathering up all the dough that remained, she again rolled it flat and repeated the process until only an insignificant portion of dough remained. All that was left to do was bake them. Pinkie opened the door to the oven and Twilight slid the tray in, making sure that it wasn’t touching any of the sides. Half an hour later, Pinkie declared the buns done. Cautiously removing the tray from the oven, Twilight set it on a nearby cooling rack. Another ten minutes had passed before Pinkie couldn’t stand to wait any longer. Taking a bun her mouth, the pink pony broke it in half and offered one of the two pieces to Twilight. Cautiously looking up at Pinkie pie, Twilight held her half to her mouth. “One,” Pinkie Pie said. “Two,” Twilight Sparkle readied herself. “Three!” they both cried out before tearing off large chunks of their respective halves. They both chewed for only a moment before spitting it out. “Salty!” Pinkie cried, rushing to stick her mouth beneath the water faucet. Twilight smacked her lips, looking around for something to get the taste out of her mouth. “I don’t understand, what did we do wrong? I followed all of your directions. “Too… uch… sal…” Pinkie Pie glubbed from beneath the running faucet. “What?” “Too much salt!” she said, emerging from the sink. “How much did you put in there?” “Two teaspoons, just like you asked,” Twilight replied, indicating the measure she had used. “But that’s a tablespoon measure!” Twilight blushed and looked down at her hooves in shame. “I guess I really am no good at this cooking stuff.” “Don’t worry, Twilight.” Pinkie Pie said, sidling up next to her friend. “I’m sure you’ll get it eventually.” “But look at how bad I screwed up, even with you helping me.” Pinkie Pie grinned. “I didn’t help. I just told you what to do.” “And that’s not helping?” “Not any more than one of your cookbooks would have.” Twilight thought about that for a moment and smiled. “I guess you’re right. I did do pretty good for a first time, didn’t I?” “Everypony makes mistakes!” Pinkie Pie laughed. “With just a teensy bit more practice, I’m sure everypony in Ponyville will be clamoring for a taste of your hot buns in no time!” “Um… sure, Pinkie Pie. Whatever you say.”