//------------------------------// // #430. Unsavory Undertakings Unleashed // Story: Gone in 1800 Seconds // by True Blue Spark //------------------------------// The Prompt: Professor Piggy’s plans for Ponyville! ------ Celestia’s sun silently sank past the skyline, dim daylight drifting into dark dusk. Sleepy citizens snoozed, snuggling stuffed toys and singing sonorous songs of slumber. But though they thought themselves safe and sound, a sinister and spiteful soul sought to settle a score. Yes, precariously perched upon a parapet, Professor Piggy plotted against Ponyville! “The night of my new nation’s nascency is now,” the porcine profligate pronounced. “My minions are massed, and my mega-mecha is marking mayhem to come. I’ll crush the cretins who cursed me, and reign as their rapacious ruler! Who could hope to halt my hoof?” “Who indeed?” A vivid voice vibrated from behind the broad-bodied baddie. The perfect purple princess, Twilight Sparkle, had come to clap the insane instructor in irons! “Cease your scheming, Professor Piggy, and submit to a strict sentence!” “Aha! The aggravating alicorn who always arranges to send my aims awry!” The cold-hearted criminal cast his cape back, eyeing the interloper. “Too many times I’ve toiled only to tumble, beaten by your brains and brawn. Not this night! Never again! Prepare for the pounding you properly deserve!” Twilight tittered. “The only one owed undoing is you, Professor. Contrive and connive however you can; I cannot concede to such a cruel crook! Now come!” The raging rivals reared, and— ------ “Pinkie? Pinkie Pie, stop.” “What’s the matter, Twilight?” “Isn’t this story a little... farfetched? Even, I might go so far as to say, absurd?” “But that’s half the fun of it!” “I know, but... The plot is pretty perplexing, the antagonist’s actions are awfully arbitrary, and... Oh no.” “Hee hee hee, what?” “Sweet Celestia... Now you’ve got me doing it.”