//------------------------------// // Chapter 14: Taking Chances // Story: The Adventures of Fragment // by A Dark Reminder //------------------------------// I walked back to my room as I thought about my situation while doing my best to ignore the fact that I hadn't had breakfast this morning or dinner last night. Gezähnt was asking for too much. I couldn't do that to somepony because of something I wasn't even sure of. What if that mare was just crazy and delusional? It would kind of explain why she was talking to changelings while changelings were attacking. I thought as I heard hoof steps coming up behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw Princess Celestia and Striker walking towards me, both of them looked concerned. "Fragment." I stopped but didn't face the Princess as she walked up to me. "How much did you hear?" I asked as Princess Celestia walked in front of me and Striker stood on my right. "Almost everything. I heard what Gezähnt wanted you to do, and I'm glad to know that all that we've done means so much to you." She said with a small smile as my gaze slowly lowered. "It means a lot more than I can tell, and I can't thank everypony who's helped me enough, but I can't stop thinking about the possibility of having a family, and what might be happening because I'm not trying to warn the Changelings about whatever it was. It's driving me crazy and Gezähnt's taunts aren't helping, but at the same time, I think he's telling the truth and really does know me and we used to be friends, and I'm not sure what to do now. If I don't work with Gezähnt than I can't help the Changelings, but in order to work with Gezähnt I have to hurt the ponies. Working with one side hurts the other." I said as a hoof lightly brought my face up, forcing me to look into Princess Celestia's eyes. "You need to decide what you think is right, Fragment. I will respect what you choose." She told me with a small smile. "And, I will allow you to return to the Changeling Kingdom if you think it's necessary. Now come with me, I'm sure we could all use something to eat." Me and Striker cheered when we heard that as we headed for the dining room. Once we were about halfway there, Princess Celestia spoke up. "There is something we need to talk about, Fragment." She said as I raised a brow. "It was by sheer luck that you weren't asked about until it was too late, but there's another Press conference later today and I'm sure that you will be one of first questions if not the first. I need to know if you're okay with me letting them know the truth." I thought about it for a little as we walked. The risks scared me, but hiding would only last for so long. "I... I need to think about it more. When's the conference?" "Two P.M." "... I'll try to have an answer by then." Princess Celestia nodded as we reached the dining room. It was a quiet breakfast, which was good, because I had a lot to think about. I really wanted to get more information about the missing Changelings and at least try to look into that mare from my flashback, but I couldn't do that without Gezähnt's help which he wouldn't give unless I brought him that locket, which there wasn't a chance I was going to do. And on top of that there's the Press conference and the likeliness of them asking about my presence and how unpredictable their reaction could be. No matter which way I looked at my situation, I was taking a big chance for something that wasn't guaranteed. It was the same debate I had before, trying to choose between the risk of coming forth and the risk of remaining hidden. I was leaning towards the truth, but I didn't want to cause an angry mob to try to run me out of Canterlot, which I didn't really think would happen with Princess Celestia around. And as I've said before, lying would only last so long. After I finished my breakfast and thought about it more, I came to the conclusion that I needed a second opinion, and I knew just who I wanted to talk to, so once Striker was done we said goodbye to the Princess and left the room. "So what's your plan now?" Striker asked as we walked. "My plan is to talk to Rightmen about this and see what he thinks. I really need a second opinion on this." I said as we started looking for a maid or somepony who might know where Rightmen would be right now. "So what do you think I should do?" I asked Striker. "How would I know?" "Because you're a guard! Doesn't that mean you work with Citizens a lot?" "I work with them a lot, but that doesn't mean I can tell you how they'll react to you. All I can tell you for sure is that as long as the Princesses are on your side nothing too bad should happen, and that probably no pony will sit next to you in a restaurant for a few weeks. Or in other words, they'll need to adjust to the idea like the castle guards did." Striker replied as I saw a familiar maid. "Noted." I said to Striker as we walked up to Jewel. "Good morning, Jewel." I said with a smile as Jewel looked away from the bust she was cleaning. "Hello, Fragment." She said, returning the smile. "I read about that mare you helped in the paper, it's amazing she actually came forward with this. I've heard that a lot of ponies would've kept something like that a secret." She said as Striker began walking away. "Where are you going?" I asked as me and Jewel watched him walk away. "Nap time. I've been up way too long and have had way too little to eat. And besides, do you really think I need to supervise you?" "Aren't you worried about getting in trouble for disobeying orders?" "No. You're a big kid now, Fragment, you can stay out of trouble on your own." Striker said as I rolled my eyes. I turned back to Jewel and resumed our conversation. "So anyways, I was pretty surprised by that too, and I'm still wondering how the rest of Equestria will react. And that's kind of why I'm here." She raised a brow at that. "Princess Celestia says there's another Press conference later today and she believes that they're going to ask about me, and she wants to know if I'm okay with being known to the public. But I don't know if I do, after two attacks by the Changelings that happened this recently I don't think I'll be exactly welcomed." "And you want advice?" She asked. "Yes. I was looking for Rightmen to see if he has any suggestions, but if you have any I'll listen to them." "Well, you're definitely right about not being welcomed so soon, but after what you've done for Canterlot, I'm sure they'll at least let you have a try. You saved at least three lives yesterday and helped fight the Cockatrice, and if that doesn't get you a fighting chance, then maybe they don't deserve to get to know you." "So what are you saying I should do?" "I think you need to give them a chance, and they need to give you one as well." "Thanks, Jewel." I said with a small smile again. "No problem. Hey, I heard that you talked to those three captured Changelings. I was wondering, what did they have to say?" my ears flattened against my head at the thoughts of what Gezähnt said. "One of them had a lot to say, but I'm not sure how much if any of it can be trusted." "What do you mean?" "One of them is a Major in the Changeling army, and he claims that he knows me and we used to be friends." Jewel's eyes widened a little at that. "And I've had flashbacks that suggest that he's right, but he also says I have a family that I'm leaving behind, and I don't know if he's telling the truth or not." "You have a family?" "Assuming Gezähnt was telling the truth, I have a wife and two sons..." Just thinking about it bothered me. That I might be abandoning a whole family without even knowing it. Not for sure, anyway. "What are you going to do if he isn't lying?" "I don't know..." I said as I began walking away. "I still need to find Rightmen and get his thoughts on revealing myself to the public. So do you know where Rightmen is?" "Last I saw he was in the northern wing of the castle." "Thanks for the help, Jewel." I said as I continued walking down the hallway. "You're welcome, Fragment. I hope Rightmen can help you." Me too... I thought as I continued looking for Rightmen. As I walked through the castle, I began to think about everything I had learned this morning. If I have a family I need to at least try to find them. Even if I don't remember them, they should have some kind of closure. What did Gezähnt say my wife's name was? 'Saphir' was it? Just as I thought that I felt pain in my head and my vision blurred a little as I tried to remain conscious, then the pain began to fade. I'd really like not to pass out right now, thank you. Why did I have to get amnesia? Why can't there be anything we can do about it? Gezähnt could help by telling me who I am, but won't without me doing something ridiculous to 'prove I can be trusted.' He taunts me about knowing who I am then acts like I don't want to know or I would only want to know so I could spy on the Changelings or something. Gezähnt is paranoid and that's why he won't help me. The thoughts of how Gezähnt probably did know me and wouldn't tell really bothered me, and as much as I wanted to believe he was lying, and I could tell he wasn't, at least not about everything, put that with the fact that thinking about the name Saphir gave me a headache, which is linked to flashbacks and therefore, memories, only made Gezähnt's case stronger. I walked through the castle, half looking for Rightmen and half thinking about what Gezähnt had told me, I looked out a window to Canterlot and saw all the damage being repaired. I felt kind of bad for the workers, first they have to repair from the Changeling attack, then in the middle of that, the Cockatrice attack, giving them even more work to do. As I stared out the window, I heard talking and hoofsteps coming towards me. I looked to my left and saw a butler I didn't recognize and Rightmen. Convenient. I thought as I began walking towards them. "We'll have to keep the icing cold until then, and don't worry too much about flavor of the cake itself." Rightmen said to the butler as they saw me walking up to them. "Hello, Rightmen." I said with a slight smile as the butler walked away. "Good day, Fragment." He replied. "Can I talk to you about something?" "Of course. What would you like to talk about?" "I'm sure you read the paper today." Rightmen nodded. "At this morning's Press conference one of the reporters asked about the rumor about me and Princess Celestia didn't answer, she told me she wouldn't reveal me unless I was okay with it, but I'm not sure if I want to take my chances with the public, and I thought you might be able to help me." "Well, as much as I'd like to help you, Fragment, I'm afraid that my knowledge of how the public would react isn't sufficient enough to help you make a decision like that. However, I can recommend somepony you could talk to." "Who?" "Miss Dex. She has more of a social life than anypony else is the castle. She's currently in the courtyard tending to the plants." "Thanks, Rightmen." I said as I began walking away. "It was my pleasure." Rightmen said as he also began walking away. I resumed my thinking as I made my way to the garden. Assuming that I do decide to go public, should I still try to stay out of sight or walk around like I'm just another pony? There's some risk in just walking into public with no disguise or anything, maybe some ponies hassle me and try to make me leave, or something else. But staying hidden brings me back to the whole debate of whether it would be better for my image to be in hiding or not. I debated the subject as I headed for the gardens, mostly to keep my mind off of my family, and luckily I had most of the castle's layout memorized, so getting to the garden was easy. I wandered around the garden for a few minutes before I heard humming. The humming got louder as I approached, and when I reached the area near Discord's statue, I saw Dex watering some flowers as she hummed to herself. I walked to about five feet behind her before I cleared my throat to get her attention. She jumped a little in surprise as she turned around. "Oh! Fragment." She said as she put the watering can down. "You startled me." Dex said as she stood up. "Sorry, I was kind of surprised to hear humming." "So what's up?" "I'd be lying if I said not much. I've talked to those captured Changelings and had two very… unpleasant conversations with one of them." Dex raised a brow as I said that. "His name is Gezähnt. He claims that we were friends while I was a part of their army. And he also says that I have a wife and two sons at the hive…” I surprised myself with just how much talking about it actually bothered me. "Damn... And this 'Gezähnt' just goes around dropping bombs like that on ponies?" "And there's also the fact that I'm on Equestria's newspapers as a rumor, which is the real reason I'm here." "What do you mean?" Dex asked. "Princess Celestia told me there would be a Press conference―" "Later today and she wants to know if it's okay with you to be publicly known?" My jaw dropped and my eyes widened as she laughed a little at it. "You should see your face right now. Ha!" "How did―" "I know? I've worked here a long time and I've seen how Princess Celestia acts. After you brought up her and the media, it was kinda obvious. So I'm guessing you want my opinion or something like that, right?" "Yeah. I asked Rightmen if he could help me and he told me that you'd probably be able to give better advice than him on this." "So what is it exactly that you want advice on?" "I want your best guess as what the public's reaction to me will most likely be." "It's not easy to say without personally knowing them, but if I had to guess I'd say they won't like you and you'll probably have to do more to improve your public image, and keep it looking good. I honestly don't think that just because the Princesses trust you means they'll play nice with you." "But you think that I could gain their trust?" "It'll take time for sure, but yeah, I bet once the memories of the attacks aren't so fresh things will be easier for you. I don't necessarily think it's smarter than not being known but it helps others trust you when you trust them, and from what the guards say, you're trying really hard to prove we can trust you." "So you think I should let Princess Celestia tell them the truth?" "It's for you to decide. Just 'cause somepony says it's a good idea doesn't mean it is. You need to do what you think is best for you, not what the Princesses or the guards think is best for you." Dex told me as she got up. "I hope that helps you. And thanks for the talk, I usually don't have anypony to talk to around here." "No problem, and thank you for the help." After that she resumed her work while I headed back to my room as I thought about what it might be like if I just walked around Canterlot, or any Equestrian city, in my Changeling form. I remembered how the ponies in Ponyville stared at me when Twilight and the others were taking me to the hospital, then I imagined that without them or anypony by my side, just me walking down the street with everypony staring at me, reeking of fear and hate. The thoughts of how they might react to me were always negative. I imagined it wouldn't be as bad in Canterlot or Ponyville; in Canterlot because of helping against the Cockatrice, and in Ponyville because I was associated with Twilight and her friends in a good way, but what about the other cities? The ones that didn't know much about me? Would they simply try to ignore me, would they welcome me to the community, or would they try to run me out of town? There was so much uncertainty involved in the whole situation that it made choosing very difficult, I was so deep in thought because of that I barely even noticed when I got back to my room. When it finally occurred to me that I had reached my room, I put my cloak on it's hanger in the closet with my magic and laid on my bed, thinking about what to do. I saw it was already eleven thirty-seven A.M and I wasn't much closer to making my decision, then I began to think about what kind of life I would have depending on if I became public; If I was known, then I might have to deal with some harassment or discrimination but overtime they might adjust, or I could avoid that problem altogether by staying in disguise, assuming Princess Celestia can actually teach me how to Shapeshift, but in that scenario I'd be living a lie, which is something I wouldn't be proud of. After a few more minutes of thinking, Striker came back from his nap and told me it was time for lunch. He asked me if I had any luck in making my choice and I told him that I was leaning towards telling the truth but I was still unsure. Once we reached the dinning room I expected Princess Celestia to be there waiting for my answer, but she wasn't there. I was told that she was preparing to speak to the Press even though it was still about two hours until it was time. I was kind of thankful she wasn't there to ask me just yet, even though I was probably going to say I was okay with it. There wasn't really anypony I could talk to at this point either. I might have been able to talk to Sinistar, but I didn't know where to find him. I might have talked to Shining Armor if I wasn't unsure of how comfortable he was with me by now, so at this point I had expended everypony I could talk to right now. After we finished lunch, me and Striker went back to my room. "So you're really having that much trouble making up your mind?" Striker asked breaking the fifteen minute long silence we had. "It's not as easy as you might think, Striker. You haven't smelled what fear and hate smell like. Remember when we were on our way to the Ponyville hospital, how most of those ponies just stared at me?" Striker nodded and remained silent. "Well I can remember their fear, and it was strong. You can get a much better idea of how much someone or something fears you when you have the ability to smell emotion, and because I can smell their fear, I can tell you that those ponies pretty much thought I was going to attack them or something along those lines. I don't know if I want everypony staring at me like that everywhere I go." "Isn't that the point of proving you're not evil? Once they realize you're just like everypony else, they won't stare at you, they won't discriminate against you, and they won't bother you. Well, not anymore than anypony else, but you get the idea." "Yeah, but what if―" "You shouldn't make a decision like this based on what you're worried will happen and instead on what's already happened. Look at how everypony here at the castle treated you; yes they pretty much just avoided you at first, but now no pony even flinches when they see you. They've gotten used to you. What's the worst you think is going to happen, Fragment?" I had to admit, Striker, like everypony else I talked to, made a good argument. After that, Striker began reading a book while I continued thinking this over in my head. I knew that my time was almost up and we would be lucky if Celestia could avoid any questions about me at the conference. At around one thirty P.M. I made up my mind, and a few minutes later there was a knock on my door. "Come in." I said as I stretched and got off my bed. The door opened showing Princess Celestia standing there. Me and Striker gave a quick bow as she walked in. "Hello, Fragment. Striker." She said as we stood back up. "I'll have to address in ten minutes, and I need to know if you've made up your mind, Fragment." Princess Celestia said as I sighed. "Have you made your choice?" "I have." I then took in a deep breath and spoke. "I'm okay with them knowing."