//------------------------------// // A Return to Form // Story: The Last Crusade // by CyborgSamurai //------------------------------// Chapter 5: A Return to Form “What the hay did you just do?!” Babs said as she woozily got to her feet. “Uh, magic?” I offered. It felt like someone had broken down a wall inside my mind with a sledgehammer. My horn was throbbing in time with my heartbeat. A headache was brewing that I could already tell was going to put my earlier one to shame.  Babs grabbed the side of the couch to steady herself. “I remember now... I remember everything! Whatever you just did brought all my old memories back!” I closed my eyes and massaged my temples. My pony memories lay beyond a muddled blur that I could only assume were my first few years as a human. I remembered everything that took place in Ponyville for six years, which put my earliest memories around when I was two. Amusingly, that also put my chronological age at thirty-three. “Un hombre,” I muttered. Babs looked quizzically over at me. “What?” I opened my eyes wide and yelled in a voice filled with venom. “¡Ese hijo de puta me convirtió en un hombre! Lo voy a matar!” Babs blinked several times. “English, please! Or Equestrian, that works too—hey! I’m bilingual now!” I ignored her and continued my rant. “He took everything from us! He ripped us from our families, dumped us here to rot, made us think we were completely different creatures, and top it all off he thinks it's funny to... thinks it's funny to... RAGGH! By all that's holy, he’d better pray I don’t find a way back to Equestria, because if I do, I’m going to shove my rapier up his—” “—no, you won’t,” Babs interrupted. She heavily sat down on the couch. “You wouldn’t even be able to get close to him. He’d probably just turn your sword into a trout or something and put the curse back on you. Face it, Ma—er... Sweetie? Wow, I’m not actually sure what to call you now. Or myself, for that matter! Which names do you think we should use from now on?” I did a double take at the abrupt change of topic, but considering we’d just been hit with an information overload, I let it pass. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, we didn’t stand a chance at revenge. We were just a bunch of foals that ran around and did silly things, and then a bunch of humans that lived normal lives. Discord was an age-old spirit with untold powers at his disposal. What could we possibly do to him? I snorted and looked away. “We were ponies first. But if you think about it, that time only accounts for a fourth of our total lives now, so I'd say it’s a personal call. I’ll respond to either of my names, so call me whatever you want.” I’d no intention of angsting over some kind of identity crisis. I didn’t want to hold Babs’ hoof through one, either. I didn’t feel any kind of separation between where one life ended and the other began, so I didn’t have an issue with thinking that both my personas were one and the same. I was slightly amused when I realized I’d been wrong about turning into Sweetie Belle, though. Kinda hard to turn into something I was to begin with. Babs pursed her lips and looked down at the floor. “I suppose humanity’s got a bigger claim to us now, doesn’t it? It’s weird, though. Both ‘Babs’ and ‘Phil’ feel familiar to me, almost interchangeable. You’d think they’d feel like separate identities, but they don’t at all! I doubt it’s going to cause any confusion if we switch names now and then, so... I guess I feel the same way as you?” I ran a hand through my mane. I was at a loss of what to do or even what to think. There was so much to talk about. Things were happening before I’d had a chance to process them. I looked down at my feet, for example, and saw that they’d almost finished reverting back into hooves. We probably had about a day or so before we fully turned back to our pony selves, and then we’d be stuck as aliens on foreign world with no knowledge of how to get home. Which, by the way, was currently being ruled over by a usurper who’d banished us here in the first place. Godammit. “Speaking of the others.” I slowly got to my feet. “We should wake them. See if we can get their memories back, too.” Babs looked up at my stubby horn. “Do you know how you broke the curse?” “Nope!” I said without missing a beat. “But I didn’t know what I was doing the first time, either! I’m just gonna do the same thing and hope it works!” Babs chuckled. “I suppose that’s pretty much the approach we take for everything.” She stood up and cracked her neck. “This oughta be entertaining, at the very least.” “Oh ye of little faith,” I teased. “When has toying with powerful forces we don’t understand ever come back to bite us in the flank?” A part of me was surprised to find using pony mannerisms felt normal after so long, but I was willing to take it in stride. Trying to overthink things right now was just going to lead to more stress and worsening my headache, and those were the last things I wanted right now. Babs gave me a level look. “Two words: duct tape.” I snickered as we went to her room. “You know, now that I think about it, that was about on par with our cutie mark escapades.” Babs hummed in thought. “I dunno. We never got the cops called on us in Equestria.” “The law enforcement in Equestria was ridiculously lax,” I pointed out. “I can think of three separate incidents off the top off my head that would’ve landed us in juvy had they happened on Earth.” Babs laughed and opened the door. “Different worlds have different ways of handling things, I suppose.” Loud, nasal snores greeted us as we walked inside the pitch-black bedroom. I turned on the light and saw Mike laying spread-eagle on the bed with her shirt draped over her eyes like a sleeping mask. Her scarlet tail poked out of the covers on the side of the bed, and her mane was a hilariously tangled mess. Babs poked my shoulder and whispered in my ear. “Try not to wake her if you can help it. Crankiness from lack of sleep runs in the family.” I nodded and crept to the edge of the bed. My pony memories gave me an elementary understanding of how magic worked, but that wasn’t what I was banking on to break the curse. I remembered that unicorns built up the energy for a spell in their bodies before releasing it, and that process triggered a specific set of internal sensations, on top of requiring a considerable amount of concentration. I hadn’t felt a thing when I’d broken the curse for Babs and I, and I hadn’t been concentrating, either. My thinking was that Discord had been interrupted when he was putting the curse on me, and I suspected that had something to do with what was going on now. Mike was sprawled out right in the center of Babs’ queen-size bed. Gingerly, I put my weight on the mattress and stealthily leaned over her sleeping form. She snored on obliviously as I slowly lowered my horn to her forehead. A bright green spark formed and jolted her with a sound like static electricity. “HUZBAGH!” Mike yelled and tried to sit up. I say ‘tried’ because I was still leaning over her, and she wound up headbutting me in the nose. I reared back in pain while she clutched her head, convulsing and garbling out nonsense. “Apple Bloom!” Babs ran to her cousin. She yanked the sheets away and held her still so she wouldn’t fall off the bed. Meanwhile, I was on the floor cradling my nose and cursing in Spanish. Mike ceased her thrashing a few seconds later. Her orange eyes fluttered open, her pupils shrinking as they adjusted to the light. She blinked several times, and when she saw Babs leaning over her, she licked her lips and spoke in a high-pitched southern twang. “Cousin?” Babs smiled gleefully. “Do you remember?” Apple Bloom nodded slowly. “Yeah, I reckon I do... ah, jeez, I still got the accent and everythin’.” Babs giggled and hugged her. “It fits you! Too bad I lost mine from living in Ponyville for that year.” Apple Bloom returned the embrace and looked out the door. “How are we rememberin’ everything all of a sudden? Where are the others?” “Don’t mind me,” I called from the floor. “I’m not in any considerable pain or anything.” Babs looked over at me and rolled her eyes. “You should’ve known that was going to happen from how we both reacted before! Use your head next time.” I scoffed. “I wasn’t even sure it was going to work at all. Excuse me for not planning out every single minute detail.” “Well, now you know.” Babs smirked. “And as they say, knowing is—” “Finish that and I’ll gore you.” “Uh, hello?” Apple Bloom waved her hands. “Can somepony fill me in?” “In a bit.” Satisfied that nothing was broken, I let go of my throbbing nose and headed for the door. “I’m going to do Scoots, then we can sit down and talk about this together.” “Uh, Sweetie?” Apple Bloom called. “You might have some trouble with that. She locked the door, remember?” I hadn’t remembered, actually. “Oh for the love of...” I threw up my hands. “I’m not waiting until morning for her to come waltzing out at her leisure! Do you have a key, Babs?” Babs made a derisive noise. “It's a bedroom door. What, you think this is an apartment complex or something?” I crossed my arms. I wasn’t going to let Scootaloo’s impulsiveness get in the way. I looked down at my hooves, and noted how solid they felt... like a pair of steel-toed hiking boots. “Well, in that case.” I went out into the hallway and stood in front of the spare room. I tried the handle one more time just to make sure, then I turned around and got down on all fours. Surprisingly, or perhaps unsurprisingly, the position was rather comfortable. I took a second to line myself up, then took a deep breath and bucked the door as hard as I could. CRUNCH The door was ripped off its hinges and sailed into the room. It crashed against the far wall with a BANG, and was immediately followed by Dylan yelling out in alarm. I straightened back up and casually walked into the dark room. “Rise and shine, fellow Crusader!” I sang as I flicked on the light. “We’ve got a big day of adventure ahead of us!” “Mage, what the hell?” Dylan shouted in a scratchy, feminine alto. She shielded her eyes with a blanket. “Get out! I’m not wearing any—WAAAAH! MY THING! IT’S GONE!" I couldn’t help but laugh. “Weren’t you the one who brought that to our attention in the first place? What, did you think you were going to be exempt or something?” Dylan whimpered and looked up at me with hurt, watery eyes. Her lower lip quivered as she fumbled for her words. “I-I…” I immediately regretted making light of the situation. I didn’t think she’d have an issue with it, but it seemed she’d just been putting up a front to save face. This might have been a problem, but fortunately, I had a way to make her to get over it. I softened both my voice and my eyes. “Hey, hey. I’m sorry. It’ll be all right.” I sat down on the bed and opened my arms. Still under the blanket, Dylan sniffled and hung her head. She scooched over to accept my embrace, and when she did, I grabbed her by the shoulders and held her steady. “What are—ARRGH!” The green spark formed and hit Dylan’s forehead. She recoiled, and I quickly got up and away so as to not get hit by any flailing limbs. “Overkill, much?” I turned and saw Babs and Apple Bloom were at the door. Apple Bloom had tied her mane back in a ponytail and was examining the doorframe. Babs was staring me down with her hands on her hips. “You coulda just knocked and said you wanted to talk to her about something.” Babs clucked her tongue at the two obvious dents in the fallen door. “Or gone outside and thrown a rock, or jiggled the door handle loose, or—” “Meh, that would've required thinking.” I lifted one of my hooves and wiggled it at her. “Plus I wanted to try these babies out. They really pack a wallop!” “No kidding.” Apple Bloom motioned to the splintered chunks littering the doorway. “You took out half the frame with the door.” I examined the damage with no small amount of apathy, as in all likelihood, we wouldn’t be staying here for much longer. I suspected Babs was thinking along the same lines, as she didn’t even look all that upset about the damage. “Celestia’s sacred flank, Sweetie!” The three of us turned and saw Scootaloo slowly sitting up while holding her head. She spoke again in a voice filled with barely-restrained anger. “A little warning would be nice the next time you want to split my head open with a rail spike!” I rubbed the back of my neck. “I figured it was best to just get it over with. Was either that or listen to you freak out over losing your schlong.” Scootaloo gave me the finger in response. “You do remember though, right?” Babs interrupted. “Your past life and everything?” A lopsided smirk crept on her face. She took a deep breath, then hopped up on top of the bed. “Assuming said past life starred me as the second-coolest pegasus this side of the Everfree? Hell yeah!” She crossed her arms like she was hugging herself. “It’s time to get crunk, Crusadaz! Gangstaloo is in the hizzaaaaaay!” The three of us groaned in unison. “The world is not ready for this,” I muttered. “I thought she was obnoxious before,” Apple Bloom said. “Think it’s possible to put the curse back on her somehow?” Babs asked. Scootaloo made a dismissive noise and hopped off the bed. “Ya’ll just be sippin’ on hatorade! You know you can’t be denyin’ my swagger!” “Hey, Gangstaloo.” I picked up her jeans and threw them at her. “Put on your clothes before I bust a cap in your ass.” Scootaloo caught the pair of jeans and stared at them for a few seconds with a blank look on her face. She looked up at me and cocked her head. “Why?” “Why?” I repeated. “What you mean, ‘why?’ We can see your, well… everything!” “Eh, she’s got a point, Sweetie,” Apple Bloom said from behind me. “We’re not gonna be able to wear clothes as ponies, and we’re changin’ back real fast here. Might be good for us to get back into the swing o’things.” “No, we—” I corrected myself and started over. “I agree we’re not going to be able to wear clothes once we turn back, but we haven’t yet, all right? We’re gonna have to go out in public at least one more time, so we may as well keep our clothes on until then. Once we get wherever we decide to go, I promise we can all run around in the nude all we want.” Scootaloo waggled her eyebrows. “I’ll hold you to that.” “Ugh, pegasi.” I rolled my eyes and walked out the door. “Come join us when you’re decent.” “So you’re thinkin’ we should leave here, eh?” Apple Bloom said as I walked past her. “Where do you think we should go?” I laughed bitterly and went back out to the living room. “Equestria, preferably. Since that’s not gonna happen, though, I figured we’d all go to one of our human families for now. That is, unless any of you have better ideas.” Apple Bloom clicked her teeth and sat down at the kitchen table. “Can’t say that I do. Though even if we could, I’m not sure that goin’ back to Equestria’s a good idea right now.” “Discord would just curse us again,” Babs agreed as she sat down beside Apple Bloom. “Assuming he wouldn’t outright kill us.” Hearing them echo my earlier thoughts was comforting in that they recognized the same problem I did, but it didn’t do much for coming up with a solution. I knew it was far too early to think about getting back home, but I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about the long-term. We couldn’t just stay hidden with our human families for the rest of our lives, and even if we could, we’d all go crazy from the confinement. I wanted to make sure that the decision we made now didn’t close any doors, so I at least felt it prudent to have a few goals set in place. “You’re assuming we’d be going back alone.” I leaned against the back of the couch and looked up at the ceiling. “I’m pretty sure that if we find a way back, it’ll be because we’ve found somepony who’s amazing at magic, not because we managed to engineer something ourselves.” “I’ll bet Twilight could figure it out,” Babs said. “In a few days, knowing her.” Apple Bloom perked up. “Yeah! And if we find her, she could help us find the others! We could reunite with our sisters, Sweetie! Maybe even our whole families!” My eyes went wide as I gripped the couch. See my pony mother and father again? Reunite... with Rarity? "I, uh…” My mind blanked as I fumbled for words. It didn’t seem that long since I’d seen them due to only just getting back my memories of them ten minutes ago, but the reality was that it’d been twenty-five years since I’d last saw them! What would I say to them? How would they feel about me living all this time as a boy? Would they accept me unconditionally? Would they reject me because I’d changed from who I once was? Would they even recognize me at all? “And how exactly do we find Twilight?” said a voice from the hallway. “Or did you overlook that tiny little detail?” My train of thought was blissfully derailed by Scootaloo, who was now fully clothed in her wife beater and jeans. Her fuschia mane and tail were messy and spiky as always, and an unlit cigarette was hanging from her mouth. Apple Bloom’s ears drooped, but she shook her head and stuck out her chin. “There’s gotta be a way! We can keep lookin’ on the Net—” “I’ve been looking since you all went to bed.” Babs got up and brought the laptop to the kitchen table. She bent the screen for us, and I saw she had multiple tabs open with search results and several news media sites. “There hasn’t been anything about people turning into ponies yet.” There was a silence as we all chewed on our thoughts. I knew we couldn’t be the only ponies Discord banished here! He would’ve at least gotten my sister and the other Element Bearers, and possibly others, too. It was only a matter of time until somepony else showed up, but would any of them have their pony memories? “I should probably mention this now before I forget,” I said. The others turned to me, and I nervously cleared my throat. “When Discord put the curse on me, he was, um… interrupted by Rarity, and I think that’s why I was able to break free. It’s probably why I was able to free all of you, too.” Babs whistled. “Sheesh, talk about lucky.” “I’ll say.” Scootaloo said. She grinned and pretended to put on a pair of sunglasses. “You might even say it was a... lucky break.” Apple Bloom threw a coaster at her. “It might also mean that the other banished ponies have no way of regaining their own memories,” I said with emphasis. “They might not realize who they really are! We could be the only ones that can help them!” “We can’t do squat if we don't know where they are.” Babs leaned back in her chair. “We may have the ‘cure,’ but that doesn't help us if we don’t know who to use it on.” I grit my teeth. It was holding the winning numbers to the lottery without knowing where to turn them in. and only having twenty-four hours to do so. I wanted to help my family! I wanted to help my friends! I wanted to get back at that bastard DIscord for doing all of this! “Then we make them come to us,” I growled. Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow. “Whaddya mean?” “I mean screw waiting for somepony to show up somewhere!” I pointed at the computer. “If we wanna find our family and friends, we gotta let ‘em know where we are!” Babs’ lips parted. “You don’t mean...” “Whoa there, nelly!” Apple Bloom said. “That’s not a good path to be goin’ down!” “Speak for yourself!” Scootaloo cackled. “I like where this going!” “We gotta do it!” I began to pace back and forth. “The Internet is anonymous and too large, but if we if show up somewhere live on TV, like during a live news broadcast, no one would be able to deny it! We could even get a message out to our family and friends! It’d go on national TV for sure—” “HAVE YOU GONE INSANE?!” Babs got up and blocked my path. “You want us to go out and tell the entire world that we’re aliens from another dimension? There’d be mass hysteria! We’d be swarmed by angry mobs! We’d be taken by the government to be probed and dissected in a lab somewhere!” I felt strangely calm as I met Babs’ clear, green eyes. “You forget, we’re also celebrities. Do you see anyone from Hollywood getting treated like that?” "Get your head on straight!” Babs grabbed me by the shoulders. “We won’t be able to get away once we’ve shown ourselves! We’ll be tracked down. They’ll figure out who we are. They’ll take our family and friends in and tear their lives apart! Don’t you understand? Everything we’ve ever known and loved would be investigated, scrutinized, and thrown into the public eye! Do you want that for your folks? For Angie?” I looked down at one of her hands. It was still human, but the hairs on her arms we lengthening and starting to turn brown. I looked down at my own and saw that the same was happening to me, save for with white hairs. As our humanity ebbed away from us, I couldn’t help but feel less of a connection with my Earth family. I still cared about them, yes, but I wasn’t even sure if they’d accept me as I was now. It was obvious that Babs' fear was making her conjure up the worst case scenarios, but I refused to believe that the society I’d been a part of for a quarter of a century would suddenly reveal some kind of xenophobic dark side. I gently removed her hands and took them in mine. “I don’t think it’ll nearly be as bad as all that. If we plan our appearance and prepare a statement, we can make a good impression and up our chances of being treated fairly by the authorities. They might even help us find the others!” Babs shook her head. “They’ll want to study us and learn more about us. They’ll ask us questions about our society and anatomy that we won’t be able to answer. I tried to say the same thing when we first broke free of the curse: face it, Sweetie, we’re in over our heads here.” My stomach twisted as I went back and forth between her convictions and mine. A large part of me agreed with Babs. It would be easy to just sit back and wait for somepony else to come in and save the day. But what if there was nopony else? What if we were the only ones that could help everyone we knew and loved? What if us sitting back meant that we’d never get home, and Discord would rule Equestria unchallenged for eternity? Was I willing to take that chance? “You know, contrary to popular belief, not all humans are bastards,” Scootaloo piped up. Babs blinked. She stepped away from me and turned to her. “We’re trying to be serious here, Scoots. This isn’t the time for witty quips.” “Ahaha, Scoots…” She smiled softly and took a long drag of her cigarette. “Now there’s a nickname I haven’t heard in forever. I only ever let you girls call me that, you know.” Babs swished her tail. “Don’t change the subject.” “Well excuuuuuse me for reminiscing,” Scootaloo blew a puff of smoke in her face. “I wasn’t trying to be funny. I really am with Sweetie on this. There’s a good chance this'll be treated it as a first contact scenario if we spin it right, and combined with our fame from the show, we’re practically guaranteed to be given the royal treatment. Hay, we can even say we’re ambassadors or something, and if our pony bodies haven’t aged at all, we’ll get major sympathy points. After all, who’s gonna mistreat a bunch of kids?” Babs frowned. “There are so many things wrong with that plan, I don’t even know where to start. You can’t actually believe something like that would actually work!” I wasn’t surprised that Scootaloo was siding with me. I figured she’d want to act rather than hide, and if she had her way, we'd probably all be out in the middle of the street trying to start a conga line. I wanted to go public, but I wanted to do it in a controlled way. Babs, of course, was vehemently against me. I understood her misgivings, but she was blowing things out of proportion. Perhaps I was doing the same thing in the opposite way, but at least I wasn’t completely shutting down other possibilities like she was. There would be details that would need to be ironed out, and yeah, it wouldn’t be the sunshine and rainbows deal that Scootaloo was pitching, but I felt things would work out in the end. Which left Apple Bloom. She’d been strangely quiet for a while now, and there was an analytical look on her face I knew she only got when she was contemplating something. She’d side with Babs if push came to shove, but we’d all agreed long ago that neither her nor Babs would consciously let their family bias influence group decisions. Apple Bloom was usually the last to give her input on things, which made her the deciding vote more often than not. I watched Apple Bloom’s eyes shift between me and her cousin. Babs and Scootaloo were going back and forth on something, but I wasn’t listening. If Apple Bloom took my side, it was three on one. If she went with Babs, we had to keep debating or come up with another idea. I felt myself sweating as her gaze met mine, and after a few tentative seconds, she winked. “Let’s do it,” Apple Bloom said. “—willingly hoof myself over to a scientist to—” Babs stopped in mid-sentence. “Wait, what?” “I said let’s do it.” Apple Bloom calmly stood up and stretched her back. “Ain’t no sense hidin’ away for years and livin’ out our lives without any hope.” “I never said we should!” Babs’ voice rose. “I just think—” “Applejack and the others are out there somewhere,” Apple Bloom said pointedly. “They’re out there alone, confused, and have no idea who they really are. We’re the only ones who can help ‘em.” “We can’t do anything for them if we’re in a government facility somewhere!” Babs protested. “How will they get to us if we—” “Even if the world was as grimdark as you think it is, our captors would still help us if we told ‘em there are others like us.”  Apple Bloom grimaced and stuck out her tongue. “Granted, they’d just do it so they’d have more ponies to experiment on, but at least then we’d all be together.” I almost pointed out the obvious hole in that reasoning, but as Apple Bloom was arguing in my favor here, I thought it best to keep quiet. It seemed Scootaloo thought the same, although if her silent laughter was any indication, she was having a harder time of it. “What about our human families?” Babs pointed to a framed picture on the wall. On it was a picture of two dozen people standing in front of a newly-erected barn. “They’ll be dragged into this, too! We can’t just—” “Sugarcube, look at yourself.” Apple Bloom guided Babs to a mirror that was hanging the wall opposite the stairs. Her mane was as red as an apple ready to fall, and slightly paler red streaks zigzagged all the way down her back. Her eyes were the color of summer grass, and her furry brown ears were slightly drooped from a combination of stress and anxiety. A trio of freckles adorned each of her cheeks, and her angular jaw was clenched tight with concentration. “Even if we all kept identification on us, the humans are gonna have a hard time believin’ we’ve been living among ‘em for twenty-five years," Apple Bloom said. "The only way they’d know anything about our human families is if we told 'em.” Babs said nothing for a while as she inspected herself. We were all having trouble coming to terms with encountering a stranger in the mirror, and it was stressful not knowing what part of our bodies was going to change next. Granted, it got easier as time went on due to the list getting shorter, but that still didn’t change that this was going to get worse before it got better. “Damn,” Babs murmured with a short laugh. “Half pony, half human… heh, I bet neither of my mothers would know who I was right now. I guess you got a point, Bloom, but I still don’t think just up and shoving ourselves in front of a camera is the right thing to do. You sure you wanna back Sweetie up on this?” Apple Bloom turned to me and gave me a searching look, which I returned without comment. She and I stared at each other for a few seconds, then she stepped in between the three of us and addressed us all in turn. “We all know we were never the ones who saved the day back in Equestria. We never were here, either, and I don’t think we’re gonna be now. We don’t got the power or courage or brains to go up against Discord, but that don’t mean we still can’t do something to help the ones that do. We got the potential to do somethin’ that’ll stick it to that dung-sucking varmint, and I’ll be darned if I’m gonna hide away like some snot-nosed yearling. We can’t afford to wait! We gotta find everypony as soon as we can, and I think Sweetie’s idea is just the way to do that. Do I like it? Not on your life. Is it gonna be hard? You bet your bottom bit. But do I think it’s the right thing to do? Yes ma’am, and that’s why I’m gonna do it, plain and simple.” There was an awkward pause as we were all left momentarily speechless. There wasn’t much I could add onto that, and apparently Scootaloo felt the same. It was clear that Babs was in the minority with her misgivings, and as she beheld the resoluteness in Apple Bloom’s face, she knew that she’d lost. I looked out the kitchen window and saw that the sky was turning a dull pink, and when I looked back, Babs’ posture sagged and she let out a long, breathy sigh. “All right. We’ll go with Sweetie’s idea.” I withheld the urge to cheer. I hadn’t actually thought the others would go along with me! It seemed things were going to move faster than I thought, and now we were going to take center stage for once! Rarity and the others would see us for sure on TV, and then we’d be able… to… And that’s when the gravity of what I’d suggested hit me full force. We were going to go on TV. “This is gonna be so cool!” Scootaloo rubbed her hands together. “We’re not gonna get the exposure that we need from the local TV station, though. We’ll need to go south to the city for sure.” We were going to make global headlines; attract the attention of seven billion people. “Good thinkin’, Scoots.” Apple Bloom shut down her laptop and began packing it up. “It’s a two hour drive to get down there, and I reckon we’re not gonna be able to drive for much longer. We’ll need to leave by mid-morning at the latest.” Our message would be forever remembered in human history as the first encounter with a sentient alien race. “I suppose we’re not gonna be coming back here.” Babs cast a despondent look around her home. “Let’s figure out a plan and a place to stay, then pack some things and get on the road.” We were going to see our pony families again. I was going to see Rarity again. “Speaking of a place to stay.” Apple Bloom turned to me. “You said Angie still lives down in the city, right? Think we can stay with her?” Shmangie… “Shit! Catch her!” someone yelled. “She’s gonna—” The floor rushed up to greet me as I fainted.