//------------------------------// // The Reel Big Fish edition // Story: It only gets weirder-er // by Aiet //------------------------------// There she was, so total and utterly... random. I couldn't help my self as I rush forward while she was sitting down on a bench with gummy, that adorable murderer. I ran up to her and grabbed her while spinning. Other ponies watched confused as I swung her around and then brought her into a hug. I set her down and she was still unbalanced. “Hi Pinkie Pie!” her eyes focused and she looked at me. “You know my name?” I smiled really big. “Of course. Who else looks like bubble gum and throws the best parties in all of Equestria?” she jumped up and smiled. “That's right and some times I taste like bubble gum too!” I couldn't believe it. I was here in Equestria with Pinkie Pie. “I bet you do...” I started feeling strange again and I knew I had to use it. “Omc I can't help it I just have to...” I was so over whelmed and had to let out the pure awesomeness of everything. So I just let what ever was in side of me just happen. Now I had no idea where the guitar came from or the band. I didn't know I could play guitar or sing but I went with it. Rainbow Dash made back in town with Travis not to far behind and they came in time for the show. I just started shredding with the electric guitar, playing by my self as ponies started to gather around. It was Eruption and I played the hell out of it, when I was done they started to pound their hooves on the ground. Then the band played with me as lead singer. ~Talking away I don’t know what's left to say I'm sayin' it anyway today's not my day to find you shying away I'll be coming for you're love ok? Taaaaaaaaaaake ooooooooooon meeeeeeeeee taaaaaaaaaaake meeeeeeeee ooooooon iiiiiiii'll beeeeeee goooooone in a day or twooooooooo~ Next thing I know Pinkie and me are back to back playing and singing. I started to leak liquid pride. This was the greatest day in my life. I don't know how she knew the lyrics but she kept up perfectly with me as we played. Travis was awe struck as he heard me sing. Lets just say the last time I was singing people called the cops thinking some one was being sodomized. We rocked so hard that the entire town was now gathered around and that’s when she saw me. Lyra couldn't believe it. There was a human in Equestria. She read all about them and for as long as she could remember she wanted to meet one... so she was going to. She started pushing her way through the crowd as the song was coming to an end and I was playing the last part of the song. I strummed out the last note as she reached me. I didn't think anything about it as Pinkie and I bowed as the crowd stomped with excitement. The band was gone and we put our guitars up I don’t know where as the crowd began to leave. All but Lyra. She just stood there staring at me in awe. At this point it still hadn't hit me who she was... until she jumped at me. Leaping strait at my chest, she knocked me down onto the ground and stared really hard at me with a creepy smile. Click. Now I just figured it out. I was pinned down on the ground by the one pony who had a fetish for humans. “Uhh hey... did you like the song?” I was doomed. She just kept smiling at me with a rape face and started to breath heavily. It was Pinkie pie to the rescue. Suddenly her face was in front of mine as she had slipped under Lyra. “That was awesome! Who are you anyway?” behind the mountain of pink mane I could see Lyra slip off and creep away. “Meason, half Mexican and half Italian extraordinary and just near rape victim.” she had a large smile as she looked at me. “Do you want to be?” “What?” “Meason!” I tilted my head back to see Travis coming our way and Pinkie Pie got off me. “Dude what was that?” I could see he was still in shock from my amazing skills. I got off the ground and dusted my self off as a familiar purple unicorn walked up. It seemed she was excited to see humans in Equestria but wasn't going to plow me down... I hope. Twilight walked up to Travis and me with bright eyes and a book levitating behind her. “Wow I was just reading about humans. This is great, now I can study you first hand.” I put up a hand near her face as if to stop her. “If you want a private “study” that's going to cost you.” she looked at me really confused and Travis snickered. “That's what she said.” “ONE!” everyone jumped looking around for the booming voice that came from out of no where. Twilight recovered and looked at me again in confusion. “So I have to pay to study you?” I just grinned. “Oh once you pay you can to more then just study.” I winked at her and I think she finally got it as she started to blush. At this time cue in the rest of the gang. Applejack was rolling in a cart full of apples and Rarity and Fluttershy had just came back from the spa. I think I chibbied once again because everyone was looking down at me and they sparkled. Travis was really worried about all this strange Pinkie pie stuff I could suddenly do now. Who knows what kind of shenanigans I could get into with this kind of... power. “Uh what with the lil' guy?” Applejack's accent was some much better in person and better then Travis's. I started to grow back to normal as Rainbow Dash spoke. “His name is Meason and the other is Travis. I found them on the out skirts of town.” Twilight stepped forward as Travis stood next to me. Her eyes were bright and wide. “How did you get here? Was it magic? Could you show me?” she spoke really fast and Travis was about to say something but I cut him off. “We were killed.” they all looked at us as Travis just shrugged and nodded in agreement. “You were killed?” it was Rarity who spoke. “Eyup. Pushed off a bridge and drowned.” Travis turned to me confused. “We drowned?” “Eyup. You were knocked out and I got to experience every agonizing second of water filling my lugs.” I felt a strange felling and put my lips together spitting out water at Travis, it was kind of like emphasizing my point. “Then how are you alive?” that was Twilight again and a had a great answer. “Well miss smart ass we don't know.” this was all very confusing to her and even me but I was enjoying it immensely. Twilight asked us some more questions and it was getting to warm for my taste. So I turned and walked strait to Twilight's house. “Sorry about him. He's a lil' screwy in the head.” Travis apologized to Twilight as everyone watched me just walk off. They all headed after me and I was just sitting on the couch reading a book. Everyone got situated and Travis sat down next to me as Twilight called for Spike. He came in and stared at us two and the purple unicorn came over. “So whatcha readin'” Travis looked over as I flipped through the book. “It's a book about anti-gravity and I can't put it down.” I let go off it and it floated above my lap. Twilight just burst into laughter and even had tears running down her face. We all just looked at her funny. “You laughed to hard at that.” I plucked the book out of the air and tossed it to the side. She looked embarrassed and turned to Spike. At this point I turned to Travis whispering as she had Spike take a letter. “Dude do you understand how great this is?” “But how did we get 'ere? And how do we get back?” I hadn't really thought about it but now that I was it was clear to me. “I don't care. I've dreamed of having something like this happen and now it is. You can go back but I'm staying. I've had enough of 'home', it can go to hell.” “THREE!” we all jumped again at the booming voice. Was it always going to count off each time I said hell (heads up, yes it will)? Travis had a thought (which wasn't often). “Where are we gona sleep?” Pinkie bound for us and jumped right into my lap. “He can stay with me!” the others gave her an uneasy look. “Pinkie dear, I don't think that's a good idea. I mean Mr. and Mrs. Cake have only so much room and the two of you are... umm.” I could see what Rarity was getting at and I agreed in my head. There probably wouldn't be a Sugarcube Corner left. “Well one of them can stay with me.” it was Twilight who offered. I stood up and hovered an inch off the floor over to her while placing Pinkie on my head like a hat. I raised both eye brows with a grin as I looked at her. Applejack spoke up. “Then Travis can stay with me. And by the sound of it yer gona feel right at home sugarcube.” Travis smiled, his was not a creeper smile like mine are, and nodded his head. We discussed some more things, like stuff about us and our home, and at about three I was getting hungry. “So what's there to eat here. I could 'never' guess what yall eat.” I winked at Travis who held back a chuckle. Spike rushed off with out Twilight telling him to and was back in a few minutes with full arms (which wasn't much seeing how they are so short). He laid out the food on the table and Travis and me went to chow down. But there was a problem. It was all hay related foods. I poked at a hay burger as my stomach growled. “Here you eat first.” I grabbed the burger and shoved it in to Travis's mouth. He gagged (which he does a lot when I'm around) a little and started to chew hesitantly. He thought and swallowed. “Not bad.” he started eating the rest of the burger as I picked up a hay shake. I sniffed it then took a sip. He was right, not to shabby. We ate until we were full as the others, except Applejack and Twilight, left. I spun around and rushed Fluttershy. There was no way she was leaving with out saying a single thing, I picked her up and looked her right in the eyes. “You're adorable.” she squeaked when I grabbed her and now she blushed. “T-thank you.” I put her down happy and went back to the food. The others gave me strange looks and I pretended not to notice as I finished my food. After we were done eating I was getting restless and wanted to do something... or someone. Applejack had stepped out to get things ready at the farm for Travis so that just left Twilight. I turned to Twilight who was taking down notes as she observed us. She didn't hear me walk up behind her as she watched Travis who was playing a game of chess with Spike. I stood right behind her and slowly placed a hand just above her tail, she froze and just stared strait forward. I started walking my fingers alone her spine and watched her with my eyes half closed. I then spoke soft and smooth. “So when are you wanting that 'private' study session?” she turned her head to look at me with big eyes. She stuttered something but was interrupted. “Meason, leave Twilight alone. Go and mess with somepony else.” Travis had stopped his game and Spike took the opportunity to switch around some of the pieces on the board. “Yeah I should. I'm going to go find Pinkie and raise some hell.” “FOUR!” we all jumped again, it seemed like we would never get use to that voice. I stopped molesting Twilight and went out the door. Twilight didn't know what to do, Travis tried to comfort her. “Meason's a lil'... strange but he's a good guy. He's one of the best friend someone can ask for and do anythin' for you. Just think of him as like another Pinkie pie...” A loud explosion thundered in the air and shook the library. Twilight looked alarmed but Travis just went on. “... only worse.” only Celestia knew what happened out side and Travis really didn’t want to go find out. Some time went on and night was coming closer. Applejack came back for Travis and I still hadn't come back, I had one more thing to do. “Ok sugarcube, everythin' is all ready for you.” Applejack, Twilight, and Travis all went out side where I met them with my band that I have no idea where they come from. They just stepped out the door and we where waiting just a few feet away. “So Travis before you leave, I have a song for you.” ~I wrote this song about you I wrote this song about you Just to let you know that I hate your guts And I think you suck...~ I don’t think I was going to be able to go a day with out singing, I was just to awesome. Although I felt something else that was weird, like I was being watched. Little did I know that it was Lyra and she had something planed for me. I don't know how she never saw Travis. Lucky bastard.