//------------------------------// // Ch. 1: When the Talent is Reversed. // Story: Rhetorical Questions // by The Notebook //------------------------------// "To Be or Not To Be? That is the question ----------------------------------- My name is Exie, I live in ponyville, and I'm 20 as of today. Ordinary life right, the same thing that I always do. But this was different I couldn't sabotage it. Not because I didn't try, but he never sees it as my fault and hates me. "Night Exie I'll see you later okay?" Noteworthy had said to me. Giving me a quick kiss goodbye. Smiling as he walked out. I loved him so much, yet I hated him. I could never rid myself of him even in my thoughts. He was always breaks my sabotage plans when I try anything to cut us off. Blaming his bad luck and not me. Why does he do that? Is it out of love? Or simply because that's what he has always seen this kind of misfortune as. I don't know, I can never decide. It was to midnight by now and I decided to walk maybe that would clear my mind of the things I don't want in there. Putting on a smile and putting a bounce into my step I began forward on my night stroll. It was always a lovely sight to see the stars in the sky while alone. No talking, no distraction... No Noteworthy. I loved him, but I hated him. His freakishly forgiving nature. Blaming everything I tried on himself. He always found a way to make up. The roses when I had accused him of cheating. The sleeping infront of my house to apologize when we fought for real. The kisses when I accidentally hit him. He always made it up to me. When I was trying to do the sabotaging. I hated how stupid he was. Not picky about what I did, didn't care about a moment of bad manors, or how I dressed (which was always the black leg Warmers with cuts and black boots.). Never once did he complain about me doing anything wrong. He always said it was his own bad luck. Maybe it was the fact he was baned from six cities because of the 'series of accidents'following him each time he went somewhere. Maybe he considered me his good luck or something. That could of been it... Maybe. I've known Noteworthy for a month now. I've tried to give and receive but all he wishes for me is to not frown upon his mistakes. This another mystery in the raveling puzzle that is my coltfriend. ------- Octavia had stayed up that same night for some unknown reason. My only thought as to why was either she suffered insomnia or she had had a late night session before bed. Either way as a very observant mare, seeing through my mask of bubbliness and such giddy emotions. (No suprise there considering how many bits her therapy business made her.) I had not noticed her during the brief moments she watched me walk down the cold grave road of town, heading torwards shop. I was by the time I went inside and closed the door, completely torn. Should I just go back to my old home? Or should I ask Noteworthy if we could step this relationship up a notch. We were both just small time workers. I was a tailor. He wrote songs of all genres for the different companies. We were able to flex so well with him. And he had no regret or any anger towards me. I couldn't decide. On one side I was waiting for the pain. But it was all self inflicted at this point I just couldn't deal with it anymore. I wanted to run. But if I went back home I would lose my chance at a independent life. I had to stay. But how could I escape my emotions for this stallion if he wasn't like anyone else? I didn't know how I was going to deal with it all either. Deciding to run or stay. Such a stupid choice I had to make. It hurt to be in this life style, yet I loved it. Everyone was nice, no drunks or gangly stallions (or the occasional mare). I didn't have to exert myself here, and Noteworthy didn't mind in anyway at all. God that blue stallion was the problem here. He messed up my life style. I couldn't go anywhere. Running wasn't an option nor was staying. I had to get away so I could think. That's it I would go for a visit to Cashmere. He wouldn't object from a visit from me anyway. It had been I think three months now, he must of had some want to see me by now. I honestly needed his wisdom right now anyways. I had started to pack a few things and some money so I could go catch the night train. I hadn't expected a knock on my door. Little less for it to be Octavia. It was even for an oblivious pony, very easy to tell I had been doing something in a hurry. "May I come in?" The grey mare asked. She was only four years older yet she was... So calm and observant. Wisdom in youth. "Sure, the stores closed right now and I'm short on time and I need to go soon so please lets make this quick." I said to exhausted to even try at being my ordinary self. "Thank you," Octavia said coming in with elegance and only four swift steps, "so where are you going at this hour? If you don't mind me asking." "To Manehattan." I replied it wasn't the full truth, but I wasn't lying. "So your meeting someone out of town? Aren't you and Noteworthy an item?" Octavia asked. Her voice should have seemed intrusive. But instead it was as if I could talk to her like old friends would. "I'm going to see my 'Adoptive' mother," I let out without hesitation, "I need to discuss some matters with her." "Is it involving Noteworthy. I know that stallion has done nothing but apologize to you no matter the sigguation. You know he's banned from Trotingham, Baltimare, and Apploosa? And all because everywhere he went and everyplace he entered collapsed behind him. Every single one. He thinks you are his strike at gold. He's never had one good thing go for him except writing music and playing the sax 'til you showed up?" Octavia told me. "I know he has. I knew he was banned, I didn't know he had so much bad luck going for him though..." I said my thoughts kicked in again hurling it all around again making my mind a shit storm of Noteworthy, and my emotions. "So it is about him. Well I know that you'll pick yourself up soon so I only ask you this - go tell Noteworthy that your leaving for a few weeks at most. You need a little time alone without him." Octavia said lightly patting my shoulder I produced a weak smile. Octavia let herself out and returned home. It was then I had realized she was not only extremely helpful right then, but had apparently been watching me earlier. A little creeped by that fact I grabbed my small bag of things, wrote a note explaining my absence. Then deciding to do what Octavia suggested I went to Noteworthy's house. The lights were off so I assumed he was asleep. I didn't have time to waste writing anymore. Not with my hand writing being hard to read and write in the first place. Knocking about twenty times and about to go for twenty-one when a very groggy Noteworthy opened the door. "Exie? What are you doing here it's two in the morning?" He said. He didn't notice my bag and wasn't mad at me from his expression I would say he was closer to bewildered. "I have to leave for a while. I need to go visit my 'adoptive' mother Cashmere." "Then I'll go with y-" "No!" I interrupted. I didn't know if I had hurt him by that. But I needed to get away from him for a bit. Octavia was like a goddess of wisdom at this moment "Tell him you need to be alone." "I need to go alone. Sort of like I can't go on your trips to see those music companies." I said. Obviously he was starting to get the memo of something was wrong, because next thing I knew he was wrapping me in a tight embrace. "I'm sorry if any of this is my fault." He told me in a whisper. "I don't know what's wrong or if I did something wrong, but come back safe okay?" He told me. What he said though made my normal attitude come back. Giggling I started at him as he only got more confused. "Such a guilty conscious. You need to stop worrying about everything being your fault." I said, giving him a quick kiss and a playful nuzzle. I picked up my bag and left, leaving the blue stallion in a bubbly awakeness. I on the other hand will I still had a smidgen of hate always floating at him for being such a worry wart I still loved him, and I knew he cared about me. "One ticket for Manehattan please."