//------------------------------//
// Chapter 3: The First Attack  
// Story: When Kindness Met Hatred 
// by Dramapony 
//------------------------------//


Chapter Three: The First Attack


We finally caught up to Mockingbird as he charged through my cottage door like a battering ram. His impact made a clap as loud as thunder. The family of Blue Jays on my roof cowered from their nest in a state of terror. The door slowly swung back, cracking as it clung to the hinges. 

Rainbow Dash and I made our way in and came to a quick stop on the center rug. My lungs begged for mercy, while I huffed and puffed for air. My heart thumped against my breast like a rabbit's foot. My wings went numb and plopped to my sides, tingling to reanimate. Beads of sweat surfaced from the roots of my mane. My brain rattled against every corner of my skull. I didn't even fly that far, but I already felt like fainting. I haven't felt that exhausted since participating in that pegasi tornado a while ago. 

When Rainbow and I recovered, I caught Mockingbird squatting over one of Angel's beds. His labored breathing revealed a mixture of angst, panic, shock, fatigue, and sadness in his voice. A thin stream of tears trailed off his muzzle and fell like raindrops onto the bunny's cushion.  

Rainbow Dash was the first to speak. "Mocking, what was up with that? You can't just run out like a mad pony, you had us worried sick." 

He didn't respond. Trying not to startle him, I approached Mockingbird in the same fashion I would for a young fawn. 

He turned to me. "I knew tonight was a bad idea. I should've just stayed home." 

My stomach began to shrivel up. "Mockingbird, you were having such a great time. What's going on?" 

He pulled himself up and uncoiled his spine until he stood fully erect. "You said there were no ponies who would judge me in this town." 

Rainbow's head shot up. "Judge you? Who would judge you? Did you offend somepony?" 

"No, I didn't do anything wrong," he answered. "But I already know that this town isn't as friendly as I thought." 

How did he get this impression, after being accepted by all of my friends? While some ponies in this town may be a bit, um, intimidating, I never knew of anypony in Ponyville who would mistreat others. 

"What are you talking about?" I asked.  

My brother gave his last sniffle, then wiped his reddening eyes dry. "It happened when I went into the bathroom..."  





Mockingbird entered the colts' room of Sugarcube Corner, the party music muffling against the closed door. Scanning the lavatory, he found and trotted up to the all white urinals. The stallion lifted himself onto his hind legs, rested his two front hooves against the cream colored walls and began to... um... relieve himself. 

I really need to start cutting back on the punch, he thought to himself. I could've sworn I saw a baby alligator swimming in one of the bowls. He chortled at the thought, thinking it was only a part of his imagination. After what felt like a whole two minutes, the stream ended and Mockingbird let himself drop back on all fours. Then, he found some company. 

A large crimson stallion, with a dark blonde mane and a green apple cutie mark, came dashing into the bathroom. The colt's puffed up face was heated to an alarming red. His watery eyes aimed for the basin shaped sinks. 

"Water! Water! Water!" he boomed out in his southern bass voice. The patron jumped to the closest faucet, turned the cold water dial and broke open his mouth under the splashing fountain. Mockingbird glanced at him. 

"You okay, bud?" he asked.    

Big Macintosh lifted his head out of the sink upon hearing the question. The remains of his drink drizzled down his chin, as he swallowed the water that made it in his mouth. After taking a short series of deep breaths, he answered with a low, "Eeyup."  

Mockingbird bit on the flush pull string, yanked it down and the urinal did its duty on command. "Good, I didn't want to have to call an ambulance for you." 

"Oh, no, it wasn't really anything that serious," Big Mac returned. "I just had a bad cupcake, that's all." 

The tenor squinted his eyes. "Cupcake? What kind of a cupcake is spicy?" 

Big Macintosh looked at the ground and sighed. "Somepony tricked me into eating an apple cupcake that was topped with hot sauce." 

Mockingbird imagined the pastry, causing his tongue to inevitably taste the odd combination. "Ick, thanks for the heads up." 

"Eeyup." 

The grey pegasus began trotting over to the sink, silently observing his fellow stallion. Big Macintosh was very tall and well-built. The jagged mane on his head ran down to the edge of his work collar, while his banes shaded his emerald green eyes. His traditionally masculine face was emphasized by his large round muzzle, smoothly aligned jawbones and visible cleft on his chin. His wide and broad shoulders helped even out his thick neck and muscled structure, that toned every part of his body; especially his hindquarters. Those smooth... big... curvaceous... delicious hindquarters. 

With every step that Mockingbird took closer to Big Macintosh, his heart began to feel more and more tender. His pupils widened. All the blood in his body heated up like a pot of boiling water. A fuzzy sensation, that felt like a swarm of butterflies, fluttered around in his stomach. His tongue tasted the dry, salty flavor of beach sand. The corners of his mouth flinched up to a little grin. When he arrived at the sink, his legs began to slightly buckle without consent.

Attraction is the strongest drug of the mind, that can turn even the wisest of ponies into fools. Big Macintosh's striking features, combined with his friendly smile, calm demeanor and pleasant tone, only excited the teenage pegasus. The vision of being held and protected by the earth pony, resting his head on his big soft chest like a pillow, enticed his mind beyond control. How wonderful it would've felt for him.   

Remembering where he was, Mockingbird snapped back into reality. "So, uh, that's a nice... structure your body has," he awkwardly complimented. "Do you work out?" 

"Eeyup." 

With a trembling hoof, Mockingbird quickly grasped the sink dial, turned the water on and began washing. "D-do you work mainly with your legs?" 

"Uh, yeah, why do you ask?" Big Macintosh asked, now sounding suspicious. 

"Well, uh, I-I just noticed that most of your strength appears to be in your hindquarters." The anxiety of hiding his most recent fantasy caused a dabble of sweat to soak on his temple. 

"Well, you're actually right. My legs do do most of the work for my line of business." There was a lift in Big Macintosh's voice, that sounded much more conversational than before. A very large contrast from the usual stallion of few words. 

"And what kind of work is that?" Mockingbird asked. 

"Applebucking, for Sweet Apple Acres. Founded, owned and run by my family for generations; since the establishment of Ponyville." Mac displayed a proud smile.  

Mockingbird scrubbed his hooves, forming bubbles of soap suds under the running water. "Oh, are you Applejack's brother? She told me how the Apple Family always sells the best top quality cider, pies, fritters, cobblers, apple sauce and jam all year round." He finished his cleansing and began drying his hooves with a towel.   

"Eeyup, you've met my little sister, Applejack," he answered. The farm colt extended his freshly trimmed hoof. "Name's Big Macintosh, but everypony usually calls me Big Mac, for short." 

Mockingbird returned the gesture, taking the hoof and shaking it. "I'm Mockingbird. Fluttershy's brother."   

Big Macintosh's face brightened. "Oh, so you sang that song earlier tonight? That was really beautiful. I think you have an excellent voice." Mac's face began flushing to pink, looking like he was almost embarrassed to say something like that. 

The pegasus smiled and nodded. "Thank you, I actually hope to make a living out of it one day." 

"Well I'm sure you'll do great. So, what brings ya here to Ponyville?" 

Mockingbird's ears flattened. Not again. The one question that everypony keeps asking me, and it has to be because I got kicked out, he thought to himself. Again, he had to lie. "Nothing special, I'm just in town visiting Fluttershy for a while." 

Big Mac arched an eyebrow. "You look pretty young. Aren't ya suppose to be in school or something?" 

"I turned eighteen yesterday, and I don't go to school anymore. I finished early." 

"Oh, okay then. Happy belayed birthday." 

"Thank you." Mockingbird felt an uninvited force pushing up his throat. A force that sounded more like a question trying to pass out of his vocals. His mouth remained sealed, but his mind kept repeating the desired line over and over: Do you want to get together sometime?

Mockingbird saw how Big Macintosh was beautiful, but was silenced by his own heart pounding. He could recall earlier in the day when he took his personal vow to not out himself to anypony in town. This was when he attempted to cut the conversation short. "Well, it, um, was great getting to meet you, Big Macintosh. I hope we see each other again soon." 

"Eeyup. Feel free to swing by Sweet Apple Acres anytime ya like." 

"Sure, maybe I'll find you working."

"Maybe so." 

Mockingbird turned to head out the door with visible ease. Big Mac just stood still behind, watching him exit. But before anypony could leave, another patron entered. A young, snow white pegasus, with a greasy black mane, telescope cutie mark and treasure gold eyes, swung the door open. He appeared to be slightly older than Mockingbird.

The new arrival stretched a smirk with his lips, eyeing Big Macintosh. "Hey, Mackey," he scoffed intrusively at him.     

Big Mac, bowed his head. "Hi, Milky Way."  

Milky Way swaggered into the restroom past Mockingbird. "You enjoy my little treat?" 

"Nope." Mac lifted his head and tried to turn it away. 

"What? Why? I thought you enjoyed hot sauce cupcakes." he asked teasingly. 

"I don't," Big Macintosh answered. "Ya told me it was an applesauce cupcake."

"Oops, did I get them mixed up... Again?" Milky Way rudely laughed at his own bad joke. A strong sense of discomfort washed over Mockingbird. A sense that he felt all too familiar with.

Macintosh sighed in exasperation. "What do ya want this time?" 

The older pegasus looked at Mockingbird. "You know, I was really hoping to be alone with you for this, but I think it's safe for our friend here to have a fair warning." 

Mockingbird took a small step back. What warning? Warned about... Big Macintosh? He appeared to be so friendly, what was there to be warned about? 

"What do you mean?" Mockingbird asked. 

Milky Way began waving his hooves. "Oh no, don't worry. It's nothing too bad." He flicked a hoof to Big Mac. "Just, be sure to stay away from Big Fruitcake, here." 

Macintosh covered his eyes with his own foreleg. "Milky Way, can you please not call me that?" 

"Well maybe next time, you should think twice before staring at my flank!" he defensively snapped back. 

"What? I wasn't even looking at ya!" Big Mac claimed. 

The white pegasus advanced onto the muscular stallion, grabbing him by the work collar and violently shoving him against the tiled wall. "Listen, apple boy, I don't do any of that cuddling you're into. Don't say you were not doing it. I saw you out there on the dance floor, eyeballing my cutie mark. I have a marefriend back in Cloudsdale. If you ever check me out again, I will make sure you get a flanking from your granny." 

"Leave him alone!" Mockingbird interjected. Realizing what he just did, his vocals began to close. His whole coat was soaked in sweat. He knew that this action would come with a price. 

The bully turned from the farmer to the singer with a menacing grin. "Why should I? Are you trying to be his knight in shining armor? Come on, kid, I recognize you from Cloudsdale. We're better than this sissy cuddler. He has to learn what happens if he gawks at the wrong ponies." 

Big Macintosh regained some energy in his vocals. "Don't argue with him, Mockingbird. He's just trying to get a rise from you." 

"Shut up, you pussy!" Milky Way yelled to him. "Kid, are you in love with him or something? Are you actually so disgusting, vile and psycho enough to accept this kind of lifestyle? There are foals around this town. What will happen if they see him doing this kind of thing. It's too obscene to let it slide. I'm giving him what he deserves, so either join me, or get out!" 

"Well, uh, actual—, you see—, I, um— ugh!" Mockingbird pulled his mane by the roots. His breathing became more demanding for air at every millisecond. He could feel the pizza and cupcakes from his last meal swimming up for an encore appearance. The room started to rotate like a carousel. His heart burned like the sun. 

Was Ponyville really as safe as he was told? Could he trust being his true self around all these other ponies? What about Pinkie Pie? The Two Musicians he performed with earlier? Princess Twilight Sparkle? Did they secretly hide these prejudices? Did everypony at that party want to take a beating on him if they ever knew who he truly was? His brain gave him the sole instruction that seemed fit for this scenario: Run. 

"I have to go!" Mockingbird cried. With his brain now on survival mode, he spread his wings and charged like a bull through the door. The loud BANG from the slam echoed throughout the bakery, silencing the celebration. He propelled his way through the party, never looked back and dashed out the main exit, leaving all the partygoers in a lost state of confusion and anxiety. 





I remained seated on my haunches in the center of the living room. My hoof covered my mouth on its own accord. I just didn't know the proper response to that incident that left me hocked and paralyzed to stiffness. The same ponies, that I showed so much kindness to for many years, treated other ponies that way? It couldn't be. I was beginning to hope that Big Macintosh was okay and that nothing bad happened to him. Poor thing. Wait? Big Mac, into colts? All these years and it never even occurred for me to think of that possibility. Could it really be true?  

"Did that r-really happen t-to you?" I asked Mockingbird. I wasn't sure whether the tears were just delayed, or I was just getting better at this.  

He wiped a streak of sweat off his forehead and said, "I wouldn't be telling you if it didn't." 

Rainbow Dash shot up and hovered in a defense position, throwing practice punches at her invisible foe. She was obviously not trying to hold back any anger. "I'm gonna have a good talk with that Milky Way! If he thinks he can say stuff like that and get away with it, well he didn't see what's coming! Maybe he's forgetting how much flank I kicked at the Wonderbolt Academy." 

Gasping, I reached up and placed a hoof on her flank. "Rainbow, can we please not escalate this to violence? Doing that won't make us any better than he is." 

She looked down at me with skepticism. "Fluttershy, are you just going to let him get away with something like that? This happened to your brother." 

"No, I think what he did was terrible," I answered, "but that doesn't mean we have to sink to his level." 

"Fluttershy's right, Dashie," Mockingbird spoke up. "Besides, it will just happen too much around here anyway." 

I turned to him. "What? Mocking, I don't know of many other ponies in town that would ever—"

"Exactly!" he interrupted. "You don't know. Shy, the reason why I don't want to be outed here is because of what happened in that bathroom. I don't want to get bullied again like in flight school." 

My ears shot up, breath emptying from my lungs. Did he really get picked on in school? Why didn't he tell me? My mind continued to draw a very long blank. 

"Bullied?" Rainbow asked in disbelief. 

Mockingbird forced himself to nod. "The worst years of my life. Going to school every single day was a living tartarus. Why do you think I was in such a hurry to graduate?" 

Like the incident from the previous day, my brain was refusing to process the new information. In all the letters he sent me, he always talked about the good at home, but was he really neglecting the bad? He always sent me messages like 'I passed all my classes,' or 'I got the lead in the upcoming school musical.' Bullying never came up, but why? 

"Mockingbird, don't you realize that you could've told me about all of this?" I asked him. "I've been there before. I know what it's like to be picked on constantly. You could've gotten through so much easier if you just talked to me." 

His muzzle aimed for the carpet. "I thought it was better for you not to know. It would've made you upset, and I thought you've already dealt with enough."

"The only thing that would've happened, was me offering you my full sympathy and support." 

"What good would that have done, Fluttershy? It wouldn't have made them go away. Did you seriously want to hear about all the hazing, black eyes, bathroom harassing, and obscene locker messages they gave me? One time, a stallion tried to pluck all the feathers off of my wings because he thought I was checking him out." His lips quivered. His nose immediately clogged with mucus. He sealed his eyes and held back the tears of those dreadful memories.  

A deep pang came to my heart like a gong. My eyes began to well. My knowledge of him having a wonderful flight school experience was shattered like a broken vase. The one time he truly needed me for support and he never told me. Why couldn't I be there to protect him?  

"You didn't have to go through any of that alone," Rainbow Dash interrupted. "You could've even come to me, and I would've kicked some serious flank, just for you."

"Rainbow!" I shot up from my seat.

"What? They would've deserved it. They can't just treat somepony like that." 

"GIRLS!" Mockingbird jumped up, then took a step back, exhaling. "I appreciate the fact that you have support for me, but when they had their suspicions, there was no stopping them. If anypony in Ponyville has those same thoughts, then I'll re-live it all like some living nightmare. Besides, it would all just be easier for everypony if I wasn't even here." 

My eyes widened. Wasn't even here? What was that supposed to mean? Did he mean not with me? Not in Ponyville? Not in Equestria? But if not here, then where? "Mockingbird, what are you talking about?" 

"It's just a thought," he answered. He trotted over to the kitchen window, fixing his sight on the dusk. "Every day, I just live in so much fear of being something I have no control over. Everypony thinks I decided who I'm attracted to and they believe that somehow, it's alright to judge me harshly for it. Because apparently, my personal life has everything to do with them. Whenever I try to defend myself, it just fans their fire. I keep telling myself that things will get better, but better never comes." 

Mockingbird reached over to my cutlery and drew one of my larger knives from its sheath. He closely examined his own reflection along the silver blade with a grim look in his, now moon white, eye. "I feel like they won't stop until I leave. It's probably what they really want. Probably the only way out of this. I feel like there's no place for me in Equestria. It's like I've been a mistake. Whatever's on the other side can't possibly be any worse than what I'm living." 

Why was he saying all this? I never knew that my brother could be so dark, or let alone think about doing something so frightening. But as I observed him gazing out into Luna's night, I developed the uneasy feeling that he was craving the same haunting nothingness that the evening sky possessed. Falling asleep, to never wake up, seeing nothing but blackness for all eternity—how could that possibly be any better than living? I glanced at Rainbow Dash, her hoof covering her heart as she stepped away. This was a pony who won't even let terror drive her to shelter, but watching the descent of somepony close was just enough to make her skeleton tremble.  

Enough was enough! I trotted to him and gripped my hoof around his that wielded the knife. "Mockingbird!" He redirected his focus to me. "Mockingbird, I'm starting to get very worried. Please tell me you're not serious!" My voice was shaking like a leaf. Tears of concern were stinging my bulging eyes. Rainbow remained silent in the other room. I just knew that things had to get better soon. If not, then his dark desire would've been granted. I just didn't know what I would do with myself if that actually came true. 

"Please," I whispered, softly. 

He began to frown while looking into my face, and snapped out of his trance. It was like he could sense how much he was hurting me by saying all that alone. The knife slipped from his hoof and fell, with a shimmering thud, to the wooden floor. He gripped his forehead like it was burning and massaged it. 

"I'm so sorry, Fluttershy," Mockingbird said. "It's just a thought I get when I'm frustrated. I don't really mean it. I'm sorry to scare you like that." 

"So you won't do it? Ever?"

He shook his head. In relief, I threw my arms around his neck and gave him a squeeze. "Oh, apology accepted, Mockingbird. But, please remember, if you don't mind that is, to talk to me if you ever feel that way, okay?"  

"Alright," he began, "I'll try looking for a better tomorrow. I'll even try to apologize to Pinkie Pie for running out, when the time comes."

"Whatever you feel is right to do, I'll support it." I gently nuzzled my head under his neck, as we made our way back into the living room. "I'm sure Pinkie Pie will forgive you for tonight's incident. She cares very deeply about how her friends feel."   

"Hey, Fluttershy, there's something on your door." Rainbow Dash was looking at the front entrance, still swinging open. On the center of the outdoor side, there was a small, manilla colored, envelope pinned to the wood. It was probably something that was there for sometime, but none of us noticed until that moment. 

I went over to the marking, ejected the pin and caught the envelope as it sailed down. I read the return address at the top left hoof corner: Mr. and Mrs. Barrister and April Shower, 4 Cloud Drive, Cloudsdale, Equestria. The center of the envelope simply said, 'Fluttershy.' I shut the door. Four years of separating themselves from me, and now they want me back? I pondered. Rainbow Dash and Mockingbird circled me in curiosity. 

"Who is it from?" Mockingbird asked. 

"Mom and Dad," I said. "I wonder what they want?" 

Rainbow peered at the mystery message yet to be revealed. "Well, Fluttershy, open it and find out." 

Without further ado, I flipped to the backside, tore off the waxy stamp seal and slipped out a white parchment that was the letter. I unfolded the paper, smoothing the creases from its original position before reading it aloud. 

Dear Fluttershy, 

How has life been for you? It's been a very long time since we last spoke with you, but we figured it would be nice to do some catching up. We imagine there's probably loads of exciting things that you would like to share with us and we have some news for you, as well. That's why we would like you to come home for a little Sunday morning brunch tomorrow at ten. We have some things that we would like to discuss. Something just happened to our family and we would like you to be here to talk it out with us. Also, feel free to bring Rainbow Dash along; we're assuming that you both are still close. We look forward to seeing you again and will not take no for an answer. 

— Love, Mom and Dad. 

P.S. You remember Zeus, right? Well he will also be joining us, so make sure to look your best for him.