//------------------------------// // Cutie Mark Crusaders Pirates // Story: Living in Equestria // by Blazewing //------------------------------// *Knock-knock-knockknockknock* “Mrmph...” *Knock-knock-knockknockknock* “Guh...bleh..." *Knock-knock-knockknockknock* “Gah! Ok, I’m up! I’m up! What’s going on?” The knocking persisted in the same style, regardless of whether or not I’d been heard. Grumbling, I got up from bed and looked at my watch. It read 7:00, which, to me, was way too early for a Sunday. Still not in a good mood, fumbling to grab my glasses, I headed to the front door and opened it. When I first looked out, however, it didn’t look like anyone was there. “Good morning, Dave!” I jumped. It was a familiar chorus of four voices. Looking down, I saw that it was Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Dinky, all beaming up at me. “Nice hair,” said Scootaloo, as the others giggled. I felt the top of my head. I must have had wicked bed-head going on. “What are you girls doing here?” I asked, drowsily. “It’s early.” “Exactly!” said Sweetie Belle. “If we don’t get an early start, we might miss the morning tide!” “Morning wha?” “We’ll explain at the clubhouse,” said Apple Bloom. “Get dressed and meet us there, pronto.” “But-” “No buts!” said Scootaloo. “You’re a Crusader, and attendance is mandatory.” “Yeah, mandatory!” echoed Dinky. “Don’t be late!” And before I could offer another protest, the four sprinted off, leaving me by myself and utterly bewildered. “Morning tide?” I muttered to myself. “Just what the heck are those kids up to?” *** In the end, showered, dressed, but still confused, I made it to the Crusaders clubhouse, and entered to find them crowded about their little table, a brown paper map spread out atop it. “Great, you made it!” said Apple Bloom. “Come in and have a seat!” I took a seat and looked down at the map. It was one of the simplest designs I’d ever seen: a blue squiggly line with a row of dashes running down it, and a huge red X within a mass of green. “So what’s this all about?” I asked. “What did you mean by a morning tide?” “We wanted to keep it a surprise until everything was ready,” said Sweetie Belle, “but now it is, so you get to know!” “Know what?” “Our latest crusade!” said Scootaloo. “We are gonna be...” And all four of them shouted at the same time, “Cutie Mark Crusaders Pirates!” Pirates? Had I heard that right? “Pirates?” I asked. “Really, girls, is that the path you wanna choose?” “But pirates get to do all sorts of neat stuff!” said Apple Bloom. “They get to sail the seas and explore new lands!” “Hunt for fabulous treasure!” said Sweetie Belle. “Wear cool hats and eye-patches!” said Scootaloo. “Say things like ‘arr’ and ‘booty’!” said Dinky. (Pillage, plunder, rifle, loot, kidnap and ravage without giving a hoot. Don’t forget those.) “Really, girls, I’m not sure about-” “And there’s more!” said Sweetie Belle. “We came to a unanimous decision,” said Scootaloo. “And decided to name you our captain!” said Apple Bloom. I blinked in surprise. “Me? The captain?” “You’re the tallest and oldest out of all of us,” said Apple Bloom. “And you’ve got a great way with words!” said Scootaloo. “You make for a perfect captain!” “Besides, we wouldn’t stop arguing about who it should be among the four of us,” said Sweetie Belle. “So, what do you say, Captain Dave?” “Captain Dave!” squeaked Dinky. I looked around at the four of them. They were smiling up at me so earnestly, and they must have been planning this for a while. If I was their captain, how would it look if I just said no on the spot? Besides, what damage could four little fillies possibly do in playing pirates? I stood to my feet and cleared my throat. All four pairs of eyes were upon me. “What do I say?” I asked. Then, I shouted, in the best pirate voice I could muster, “I say let’s set sail, ye pack o’ landlubbers!” “Aye-aye, Captain!” said all four Crusaders, saluting. “I assume ye’ve all got the proper gear for pirating?” “Yes, sir!” said Scootaloo. “Then let’s suit up and ship out, ye swabbies!” “Yay!!” *** In no time, the five of us were decked out and ready for sailing. I had been given a real tricorner hat and a long wooden sword on a belt. The fillies were wearing bandanas of varying colors on their heads (red for Apple Bloom, green for Sweetie Belle, blue for Scootaloo, and yellow for Dinky) with smaller swords slung at their waists. They’d also taken the time to appoint their positions within the crew. Apple Bloom was my first mate, Sweetie Belle was the navigator, Scootaloo was the lookout, and Dinky was...the parrot. Yes, the parrot. She chose it herself. She took it upon herself to sit on my shoulder and repeat what I said, and looked quite happy about it. “So you’re really doing this?” I asked her, when she had sat her little self on my shoulder. “So you’re really doing this?” she repeated, speaking in what I assumed was an impersonation of my own voice. “Hey, I do not sound like that.” “Hey, I do not sound like that.” “Quit that.” “Quit that.” I tried staring her down, but she just grinned cutely back, scrunching up her little nose. “Oh, so that’s the game you’re gonna play, huh?” I asked, crossing my arms. “Oh, so that’s the game you’re gonna play, huh?” she imitated, crossing her forelegs. “Ok, then, try this.” “Ok, then, try this.” “Raggle-fraggle!” “Raggle-fraggle!” “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!” “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!” “Nanu nanu!” “Nanu nanu!” “Bricka-bracka-firecracker-siss-boom-bah!” “Bricka-bracka-firecracker-siss-boom-bah!” I just stared at her. She hadn’t missed a single one! Satisfied that she’d won, she giggled and stuck out her tongue. I pointed a finger at her. “You win this round.” “You win this round,” Dinky mimicked, mirroring my point, though it turned to a boop on my nose. The three other Crusaders giggled. “All right, ye sun-drenched sea urchins!” I barked in my pirate’s voice, snapping them to attention. “Fun’s fun, but we’ve got sailin’ to do! Now where’s our vessel?” “Right this way, Captain!” said Scootaloo. She, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle led Dinky and me through a thick patch of bushes, until we eventually ended up at the edge of a river. On the bank, sitting at the ready, was a big log raft, wide enough for the five of us to settle onto, outfitted with a mast about half a head taller than I was, a cloth sail, and a crow’s nest. It actually looked pretty good. “Wow,” I said. “You kids built this yourselves?” “Not exactly,” said Apple Bloom. “We had to get mah brother to get the logs and help us put it together.” “Well, I think it looks very shipshape,” I said. “Does it have a name?” “We left that to you, Captain,” said Sweetie Belle. “Ah, right, right. Hmm...” I cast my mind around for a good name for this craft, Dinky imitating my thoughtful face. At last, I snapped my fingers in inspiration. I saw Dinky trying to imitate me, but as she had no fingers, she couldn’t snap a hoof, so she gave up and said, in a pouty voice, “Cheater”. I drew my wooden sword and reverently tapped it on the side of the raft. “In the name of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, I christen you...the Celestia.” The Crusaders looked puzzled. “A fine ship has to have a fine name, doesn’t it?” I asked. “Ohhh!” they said in unified comprehension. “Now let’s set sail, me little hearties!” Together, we managed to push the raft into the river, where it landed with a soft splash. I stepped aboard, Dinky still sitting on my shoulder, and helped the others onto it, one at a time, as the raft began to drift. “All right, Lookout Scootaloo,” I said, “you take the crow’s nest, and keep a sharp eye out for any trouble.” “Aye-aye, Captain!” said Scootaloo, saluting. I hoisted her up to the little crow’s nest, where she immediately began looking this way and that, shading her eyes against the sun. “Sweetie Belle, keep the Celestia on a steady course.” “Aye-aye, sir!” said Sweetie Belle, and she took a seat at the makeshift rudder fastened to the back. “Apple Bloom, as my first mate, it’ll be your job to make sure this boat runs smoothly. Report to me any and all troubles or concerns. For the time being, though, raise the mainsail!” “Aye-aye, Captain!” said Apple Bloom, and she began raising the big sail. “To sea, mateys, to sea!” I crowed, raising my sword. “Swab the poop deck!” This was met by a bout of giggling from the girls, which I rolled my eyes at. Then again, the Celestia having a poop deck did sound kinda hilarious. Oh, to be easily amused by toilet humor. “Man the bowsprit! Batten down the hatches! And if they’re already battened down, batten them down again! We’ll show those lazy hatches!” “Yeah, we’ll show them!” squeaked Dinky. I chuckled and ruffled her mane, then settled myself by the bow of the raft as the Celestia rolled on. *** The wind was good, and kept us blowing along at a nice speed, not harrowingly fast, not sluggishly slow. Sweetie Belle sat at the rudder, giving little nudges this way and that now and again. Scootaloo would peer over the crow’s nest and shout down that the way was still all clear. Apple Bloom wandered around the perimeter, checking that everything was A-OK. Dinky, who was getting drowsy, sank down into the crook of my arm, while I lay stretched out, hat low over my face. At last, roused a bit by a small ripple in the water, I sat up, pushing my hat up. “First mate!” I called. Apple Bloom appeared promptly. “Yes, sir!” “Time passes slowly at sea. Does anypony have an instrument or know a song or something? It would give us something to wile away the minutes.” “I’ve got something, Captain!” called Scootaloo from up above. “And what’s that, lookout?” I asked. “A song!” She cleared her throat and began to sing in a very off-key tone that made me cringe. “Row, row, row your boat Gently down the stream Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily Life is but a dream” “Thank you, Scootaloo, that was very rousing!” I called up, hands over my ears. That certainly narrowed down what her talent could be... “Ah’ve got something, Captain,” said Apple Bloom. She held up a silver harmonica, glinting in the sun. “Ah, cool, a harmonica!” I said. “Can you play?” “Applejack showed me how once!” said Apple Bloom. “Sometimes she plays it when she’s relaxin’ after work.” “Great! Then let’s have us a song.” Apple Bloom hunkered down beside me, put the harmonica to her mouth, and blew a single note as a preliminary. Then, to my surprise, she began playing a song with incredible skill for such a little filly. I couldn’t really pick up if it was a song I knew, but it didn’t matter. It had a slow, methodical tune to it. It was incredible to just sit and listen to her play, eyes closed, swaying slightly with the music. I could almost see Applejack playing it herself, showing Apple Bloom the proper hoof placement for the note holes. It was unbelievable that these kids could be so amazing, yet not know their true talents yet. I was snapped out of my reverie, however, by a shout from Scootaloo. The wind seemed to have picked up quite a bit also. “Captain! Unfinished beaver dam, dead ahead!” Apple Bloom stopped playing at once, looking startled, and I shaded my eyes to indeed see what looked like half of a beaver dam blocking the right side of the river, a beaver still slapping away at it with its tail. “Sweetie Belle!” I yelled. “Hard to port!” “Huh?” “Port! Port! Don’t you know what port means? Left!” “Oh! Left! Got it, Captain!” Sweetie Belle gave a tug on the rudder, but instead of going left, we veered even more to the right, the starboard side of the raft scraping against the bank. “No, no, your other left!” I shouted. “Oh, sweet applesauce!” yelled Apple Bloom, covering her face with her hooves. Scootaloo clung tight to the crow’s nest, and Dinky clung to my side. The beaver saw us coming, gave a squeal of terror, and scurried away. With a crunching noise, we barreled right through the dam, bits and pieces of it splintering away. I looked back to see the beaver shaking its fist at us, jabbering angrily. “Sorry!” I called. “It was an accident!” I then turned to Sweetie Belle. “For the record, navigator,” I said, a bit tersely, “starboard means right, and port means left.” Sweetie Belle laughed sheepishly. “Sorry, Captain,” she said. “It’s all right, just try to be a little more careful, ok? We don’t want to run into any more beaver dams.” “Got it.” “I didn’t expect us to be going so fast, though. When did the wind pick up?” “Not too long ago,” said Scootaloo. “We’re almost to our destination, anyways. The weather’s always kinda wonky there.” “You know, I never asked: what is our destination? Not to diss the cartographer, but the map isn’t very self-explanatory.” It was Scootaloo’s turn to give a nervous laugh, which told me she had been the artist of the ‘map’. “Right there, Captain,” said Apple Bloom. I followed her pointing hoof and felt my stomach do a somersault. The river we were riding was going straight into the Everfree Forest! “The forest?! Are you out of your minds, girls?!” “But the forest is so full of mystery!” said Apple Bloom. “Who knows what kinda valuable treasures we might find buried away inside it?” “Yeah!” said Sweetie Belle. “Rarity told me all about the abandoned castle where she and the others found the Elements of Harmony. There could be loads more treasure stashed away in it!” “I don’t care if that forest is full of buried golden underpants!” I snapped. “I am drawing the line right here!” “Golden underpants? Eww!” said Dinky, and the girls giggled. “Oh, you think this is funny, do you?” I asked, hotly. I turned my gaze to the crow’s nest. “Scootaloo! You of all ponies should know why this is the absolute worst route we could be taking! Or did you already forget?” Scootaloo stopped smiling immediately, her ears flattening. I reached up to pet her mane in a consoling way. “Exactly. I’m not trying to dredge up ancient history, Scoot, and it doesn’t just have to do with what happened that day. I know I’m nowhere near as versed on what goes on in that forest as anypony else, but I can already say from my one time in there that I would not want a repeat visit, and I don’t think any wise pony would, either. Now, as your captain, I insist that we turn around right now.” “Um...we can’t, Captain,” said Apple Bloom, uneasily. “And why not?” “Two reasons,” said Sweetie Belle. “One, the river’s taking us one way.” “And the second reason?” “We’re already in the forest.” I looked about. Sure enough, we were already enclosed in a dense mass of dark green foliage, the sunlight almost completely blotted out. “Oh, nuts,” I muttered. This was just perfect. Here I was, adrift on a raft, riding down a river through the most perilous forest I had ever encountered, with four little fillies in tow. And, of course, as the captain, their safety was my responsibility. How could I have let this happen? My worries were checked for the moment, however, when I became aware of an odd rushing noise, growing ever louder. And then, a sinking feeling began to settle in. “Uh, girls? Question: are there rapids in the Everfree Forest?” I turned to look at them. Neither of them answered, but the looks on their faces told me all I needed to. Looking ahead, I saw the water foaming and splashing, a telltale sign of one of two things: rapids or a waterfall. “Girls, we need to get off the boat! Now!” “But it’ll get smashed!” protested Sweetie Belle. “If we stay on it for much longer, we’ll get smashed!” “Good point,” said Sweetie Belle, after a reflective pause. “Now come on! Jump to the other side!” Scootaloo had already taken the hint. She leaped from the crow’s nest, wings flapping as she hovered down. To my amazement, it wasn’t the same hummingbird-like flapping she used to employ. It was slower, steadier. She had been practicing. I didn’t have time to continue marveling, however. Apple Bloom, crouching low like a cat, pounced for the other side, but her hooves slipped, and she fell onto her stomach, where she began sliding toward the water. “Apple Bloom!” I yelled. Fortunately, Scootaloo was quicker on the draw. She ran forward, grabbed Apple Bloom’s hooves, and dragged her onto shore. “Thanks, Scootaloo,” I heard her pant gratefully. “Anytime,” said Scootaloo. “Right, come on, girls,” I said, turning to Sweetie Belle and Dinky. They didn’t move, and were looking terrified. “I don’t think I can make it,” Sweetie Belle whimpered. “Me neither,” whispered Dinky. “Come here, then,” I said, and I scooped up the two little unicorns, holding them against my chest. I could feel them shivering. “It’s gonna be ok.” “Hurry!” Scootaloo called, as she and Apple Bloom raced along the bank to keep up. “You’re getting closer to the rapids!” I looked up. The rapids were indeed looming closer. “Hang on tight,” I whispered to the two. With a crouch, I leaped towards the opposite bank. Unfortunately, when I landed, my foot slipped, and I dropped Sweetie Belle and Dinky, who tumbled onto the bank. I, for my part, had begun to slip into the swift-moving water, just like Apple Bloom, and I was beginning to think that I hadn’t learned enough swimming lessons to survive in rapids water, but the four Crusaders grabbed my hands and, tugging together, managed to slowly drag me ashore. “Are you ok, Captain?” asked Dinky. “Yeah,” I panted. “Thanks, girls. You really saved my skin...” The four smiled, but a crashing sound turned our attention to the river. The raft had gone into the rapids, and was being battered and buffeted around among the rocks. I looked at the Crusaders, who were mournfully watching their craft roll away, probably never to be seen again. I stood up and took off my pirate’s hat in respect. “She was a fine craft, lassies,” I said. “A fine craft.” The fillies nodded glumly. Then, all of a sudden, a new noise hit the air. “Ow! Oh my stars, what just hit me?” The five of us stared at each other in dumbfoundment. “Uh oh,” I muttered. “I think we just hit someone. We’d better go see.” It was against my better judgement, but we plunged further into the forest, following where the voice had come from. *** We pulled to a stop at another riverbank, cutting the forest into two. That was nothing compared to what was in the river, however. Looming high up was what could only be an honest-to-goodness sea serpent. He had purple scales, long skinny arms, a flamboyantly well-styled orange mane, and the weirdest mustache I had ever laid eyes on. Half of it was the same orange as his ‘do, but the other was purple and curled like a corkscrew. There was something oddly familiar about that half of mustache... “Goodness, ponies do need to watch where they’re dumping their garbage,” the serpent muttered. His great eyes then fell on us, and he jumped in surprise. “Oh! Well, hello there! And what may I do for you?” “Er,” I began, uncertainly. The fillies were staring up at the serpent in mute wonder. “What’s the matter?” asked the serpent. “Is there something on my face?” (Yeah, and WHAT a something.) “I’m sorry, I’ve just never seen a real sea serpent before. You are a sea serpent, right?” “Certainly,” said the serpent, slicking back his hair. “Magnet’s the name, Steven Magnet. And you are?” “Er, I’m, uh...Captain Dave,” I said, feeling my hat. “And these are my shipmates, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Dinky.” “Delighted to meet you,” said Steven. “Hold on...” he added, in a voice of comprehension. “If you’re a captain, and these darling fillies are your crew, then I assume you might know something about this?” He gestured to the raft, which had run aground. It had splintered nearly in two, the mast sunken right between it. The Crusaders winced. “Ah. Yes,” I said. “We’re really sorry about that. We had to bail out before we hit the rapids.” “Oh, no need to apologize, I understand,” said Steven, waving his hand airily. “I just wish I’d had a little more warning. Nothing ever comes down this way beyond the odd log from some silly beaver’s dam. You don’t get many outside visitors in the Everfree Forest.” “I, uh, can kinda see that,” I said. (Ok, Dave, time to put those lessons on inter-species diplomacy to work. Just be natural...) “I hope you don’t think I’m being rude, but I couldn’t help but notice your mustache.” “Yes? What about it?” he asked, twirling the purple half. “It’s, er...very unique.” “Why, thank you!” “That half of it looks a lot like how my sister styles her tail!” said Sweetie Belle. “It’s even the same color!” “Really?” Steven then clapped his hands to the sides of his face in surprise. “Ah! Of course! You must mean the generous unicorn who gave up her tail to mend my luxurious mustache!” “That’s right,” I said, briefly befuddled by the fact that he pronounced mustache ‘moose-tash’. “You’re the serpent she helped during the Nightmare Moon fiasco. You’re famous.” “I am?” Steven asked, delighted. “Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! How wonderful! I’ve always wanted to make a name for myself.” “Uh, yeah, right.” This guy was really over-the-top. The sooner this conversation ended, the better. “Hey, listen,” I went on, catching on a thought. “You live here in the forest. Would you happen to know if there are any hidden valuables or lost treasures? We were kinda on a treasure hunt.” “Treasures?” asked Steven. “Let me see...Treasures...treasures...Well, I do know there’s an old castle just beyond here, but I’ve never seen anything of real value inside it. All I really know is there’s some tacky old gargoyle statues decorating the outside. Absolutely ugly!” He made a face. “Whoever lived there last had no sense of feng shui.” “Really? You don’t say. Well, I’m glad you warned us. Otherwise, we might have gone there for nothing. Sorry again for crashing our raft into you.” “Oh, it was my pleasure to help,” said Steven, “and don’t worry about the raft. I’m just glad you poor sailors avoided those nasty rapids.” “Right. So, can you tell us which way is the best one out of the forest?” “Couldn’t be simpler! Just follow that dirt track at your feet. Should lead you right out.” I looked down. There was indeed a dirt track beneath our feet. Er, my feet and the girls’ hooves, I should say. “Awesome. Thanks again, Mr. Magnet.” “Not at all, not at all,” said Steven. “Stay safe, and keep a watch out for timberwolves!” “Oh, yeah, those things,” I muttered to myself. “We will,” I told Steven. “Come on, girls.” The five of us took our leave of the flashy serpent, who settled back down below the water, disappearing from view. *** The girls were oddly subdued as we went along the path. They didn’t look at each other or at me, but kept their faces straight ahead, looking glum. I had a feeling I knew what was wrong. “Kids,” I said, gently, “I’m really sorry. I know that raft took a long time to make, and-” “It’s not just the raft, Dave,” said Apple Bloom. “Huh?” “We were so excited about being Cutie Mark Crusaders Pirates,” said Scootaloo. “But we almost get all of us and you killed, lose the raft, and didn’t even find any treasure,” said Sweetie Belle. Dinky sighed sadly. “Aw, girls...” I thought for a moment for something to say, then said, reasonably, “Playing pirates is fun, but do you really want to make a living sailing for weeks, maybe even months on end in a boat, just to go tramping around in the hot sun through sand and jungles searching for treasure that might not even be there?” The four turned to look at me. “If you ask me, I say we leave the dangerous treasure questing to ponies like Daring Do. Besides, isn’t it more fun to be able to hear about those stories than to blindly fall into dangers like that ourselves?” The four looked at each other, then back at me. Finally, they smiled. “Yeah, you’re right, Dave,” said Sweetie Belle. “It was a good try, though,” said Scootaloo. “Yeah. It was kinda fun, wasn’t it?” I asked. “It may be something to scratch off the list,” said Apple Bloom, “but we’re not gonna pack it in yet!” “A Crusader’s job is never done!” squeaked Dinky. “You said it, sis,” said Scootaloo. The return of their energy brought a smile to my face. “That’s the spirit,” I said. “Now what are we?” “The Cutie Mark Crusaders!” chorused the girls. “And we’re not afraid of anything, are we?” “No, sir!” Something rustled in the bushes just behind me. “YAUGH!” I jumped about a foot in the air and whipped about, my wooden sword drawn. The girls stiffened as well, staring about with wide, alert eyes. “What was that?” “I don’t know,” said Scootaloo. “Could be anything in this forest.” As I stepped backwards, I heard something snap, whirled around with a yelp, and swung my sword about...at thin air. I’d stepped on a twig. The girls were starting to giggle at my jumpiness. “Ok, mateys, a joke’s a joke,” I grumbled, “but this forest really gives me the heebie-jeebies. What do you say we just head back to Sugarcube Corner? My treat.” “YAY!” cheered the fillies, and they instantly made a beeline toward town. Glad to have an excuse to get away, I hurried after them, leaving the Everfree Forest behind in our wake. *** The five of us sat, enjoying fresh cookies provided by Pinkie, who was back at her spot behind the counter, offering service with a smile. She actually came over to hear about our escapades. “You rode down the Everfree River?” she asked. “On a log raft?” “It was a fine craft, Pinkie,” I said, regretfully. “There shan’t be another like the Celestia." “Especially not with a poop deck like it had,” said Scootaloo. The girls broke out into fresh laughs, Pinkie laughing the loudest. “You mutinous scalawags,” I muttered. “How dare you mock the majesty of the Celestia!” “Relax, Dave, we were only jokin’” said Apple Bloom. “I should hope so. Think of what the princess would say if she knew you were taking her name in vain for such a joke.” “I dunno,” said Pinkie. “I heard she likes a good joke every once in a while. We actually pranked her with vanishing ink once, and she never got mad about it!” “Really?” “Yeah!” “Wow. I’ve never known a ruler who was so relaxed about stuff like that.” “Shame we had to lose the raft, though,” said Apple Bloom. “Yeah. It did have a nice poop deck,” said Sweetie Belle, unable to keep a straight face. “Ok, knock it off!” I snapped. “As your captain, I forbid you to say those words!” “Which words?” asked Dinky. “Poop or deck?” “Either, and/or both!” The girls laughed again, but were interrupted by a loud clinking noise, as of a glass on a tabletop. “Hey, Pinkie, another milkshake,” came a gloomy voice, one I recognized. As Pinkie turned to investigate, I saw Spike sitting alone at a table, an empty milkshake glass in front of him, and his face was one of the glummest I had ever seen. His eyes were tinged at the corners with red, as if he had been crying. “Spike, don’t you think you’ve had enough?” Pinkie asked. “C’mon, Pinkie, just one more?” Spike pleaded. “Please?” Pinkie, looking like she shouldn’t, but didn’t have a choice, removed his glass. “Spike?” I asked, bewildered. “Uh?” He turned his bleary eyes toward me. “Oh, hey, Dave. Nice hat.” “Spike, what’s the matter?” I got up and went over to him. “You look terrible.” “Do I? Well, small wonder.” Pinkie returned with a fresh vanilla milkshake, still looking concerned. Spike took a long, steady sip through the straw, wiped his mouth, and said, in a voice cracked and sounding on the verge of tears, “You know how you said Peewee was acting restless?” “Yeah?” “Well, Twilight wrote to Princess Celestia yesterday for advice. And she...” Spike sniffed and wiped his nose with the back of his arm. “She said that phoenixes take a lot of care and patience to tend for, and she and Twilight both thought that...that maybe Peewee would be happier if he was...if he was with his own kind...that I should...should find him a new home...” Pinkie gave a slight gasp, and the two of us looked at each other before turning back to the little dragon, who was trying hard not to completely lose it. “Oh, Spike...” I muttered. “I’m so sorry. I know this can’t be easy for you.” “It isn’t,” said Spike, “Peewee’s known me ever since he hatched. How do I know he’s going to be all right if I just let him go? He was my own pet, my own little friend, and now Twilight and the princess just want me to give him up? I know it’s for his own good, but it’s not fair! It’s just not fair!” He buried his face in his arms atop the table-top, the milkshake unfinished and forgotten. Pinkie came over and put her forelegs around the baby dragon, patting his back. I looked over at the Crusaders. It seemed they had overheard, and were looking concerned for the poor guy as well. What was one supposed to say at a time like this? Well, I had to say something. “Spike, no one likes saying goodbye to their pets. I’ve had several who have come and gone back home. I know it has to be especially stressful for such a young kid like you.” Spike sniffled and looked up, tears in his green eyes. “Think of it this way,” I tried, “You said you got Peewee as a wild phoenix egg, right?” “Y-Yeah. A bunch of dragons I thought were my friends wanted me to smash it, but I took it home instead.” “Well, you’ve done the best you can for him. You spared him from those dragons, you helped hatch him, you tried to give him a home. Well, sometimes we have to know how far our gifts can go. Maybe Peewee’s just not meant to be cooped up in a house. Maybe he wants to be wild and free among his own kind.” I could see fresh tears forming in Spike’s eyes, so I put a hand to his claw. “Look, Spike, I know it hurts, but you could also look at that in a good way. I’ve heard a wise man say that the more it hurts when you say goodbye, the more you know you cared about them, and still will care about them.” Spike didn’t say anything, so I tried something else. “Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘If you really love them, let them go’?” Spike shook his head. “It means that sometimes, we have to make sacrifices for those we truly care about, even if we don’t think it’s right for us. If you really do love Peewee, then maybe it’d be for the best to take Princess Celestia’s advice. I’m sure she’ll find a home for him. Who knows? Peewee might get lucky and be returned to his old parents. You could help him with that!” Spike’s eyes widened slightly, and he wiped his eyes. “Wouldn’t that be something, Spike? You know where you got him, don’t you? Maybe you can bring him back to the mom and dad he had as an egg. I think that would make him really happy, don’t you?” Spike considered for a moment, then said, with a brave attempt at a smile, “Yeah, it would. Do you really think it can happen?” “It could. Besides, wherever he ends up, you can always visit him, can’t you?” “Yeah, I could!” Spike sat up straighter, a smile on his face. “You’re right, Dave. I’ve gotta put Peewee first. I’ve tried to be a good owner for him, but maybe I’m just not cut out for it. I’m gonna ask Twilight if we can try to find his old nest first chance we get!” Pinkie beamed down at him and gave him a loving noogie. “That’s our responsible Spike!” she cooed. “Aw, sheesh, cut it out, Pinkie,” laughed Spike. He then looked up at me and said, genuinely, “Thanks, Dave. I needed a good pep talk.” “You’re welcome, Spike. Everything’s gonna be ok, you’ll see.” “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. I’ve gotta go, Pinkie. Put my shakes on Twilight’s tab.” “Will do!” Spike hopped down from his chair and scurried out the door. I turned to Pinkie and asked, “Does Twilight even have a tab?” “I guess she does now,” said Pinkie, with a shrug.