//------------------------------// // Chapter 19: The Princess, The Plumber, and the Produce // Story: The Defective Warp Pipe // by Level Dasher //------------------------------// As Princess Celestia used three of the Augmentation Stones to open the portal, everyone else stood back. I watched as the golden glow around her horn enveloped the Augmentation stones, which then in return shot what looked like small sparks of electricity back to her. The glow then momentarily changed to a deep blue, and everyone watched in amazement as her horn fired what looked like a gigantic bolt of lightning into the sky. Rainbow Dash had cleared the clouds away from here so we could see the portal, and it was quite high. It was a wonder I hadn’t broken my leg when I fell from that height. Celestia stopped and took a breath. She then picked up the remaining stone with her magic, and we all watched as her horn’s glow changed from yellow to green this time, then a spark flew up through the portal and disappeared. We took a moment to let the spell take its effect, but then… As if on cue, a creature that looked like a mis-matched flying puzzle of animals came through the portal and landed nearby. “Do you always have to ruin my fun, Celestia?” This must have been Discord. “Fun time is over, Discord. We— what is that around your neck?” I looked where the Princess was pointing. It seemed to be a necklace of some sort. The emblem was a mushroom… with a crown on it… could it be? Discord smiled and replied, “Oh, this? Just a little souvenir. I must admit though, it was certainly a royal pain to get my paws on! HA HA HA! I kill me!” I turned to Toad and told him a theory: Princess Peach could have been trapped in the necklace somehow. I then saw a change in Toad I had never seen before. Rage filled his eyes, and I could have sworn I saw steam coming out of his ears like a cartoon. His voice was deep. “Nobody does that to my princess…” Toad withdrew himself from his robe that he had refused to take off during the past weeks. My eyes nearly popped out of my head: his body was RIPPED. I had no idea how he did it, but his muscles were bulging, and veins were throbbing in his forehead. Without hesitation, he yelled, “Yoshi, spit-shot, NOW!” Everyone watched first in horror, then in awe, as I took Toad into my mouth and shot him directly at Discord. Flying through the air at just-short-of-Rainbow-Dash speed, Toad grabbed Discord by the throat and tore the necklace off. Discord began flailing his limbs in all directions, obviously unable to breath. It wasn’t until he had taken a deep, satisfied breath that Toad released Discord’s throat and said, “You’re lucky I won’t do worse.” We all watched with eyes as wide as dinner plates as Toad casually walked back to me, staring intently at the necklace in his hand. When he reached me, he said, “You must have a sixth sense, my friend." He held the necklace up to my eye level, and I could see her quite clearly: Princess Peach pounding her fists against the inside of the necklace. Toad then put the emblem to his mouth and said, “Stand back, Princess.” He then proceeded to make a fist. Before I could stop him, Toad smashed the necklace to pieces. There was a loud crack as a cloud of dust appeared from Toad’s hands. From the short distance she was from us, Rainbow Dash gave a slight beat of her wings. In a split-second, the dust was gone, and there stood Princess Peach. Peach looked at her surroundings, an utterly confused expression on her face, likely due to the fact that she had just been rescued and Mario was nowhere in sight. Toad looked at her and said, “I’ll explain everything later, Princess. It’s a long—” “Ha ha ha. I’m not finished just yet— I brought another little souvenir with me, and this one isn’t so little!” Discord had gained his breath back. When we all turned to look at him, he smiled and snapped his fingers. It looked like nothing happened. He just sat there with his arms crossed, a nasty smirk on his face. Everyone was confused. Was he just trying to mess with us? I was about to wave off the gesture, but then I saw Discord look up and laugh, and I heard it. It was gradually getting louder: “AH-WA-WA-WA-WA-WA-WA-WA-WA!!” No…… way… I watched as he fell, waving his arms as usual. I couldn’t believe Discord brought him here. “Don’t worry! I’ve got it!” Rainbow Dash flew underneath where Mario was going to land and prepared to catch him. I knew this wasn’t a good idea, but we didn’t really have time to think of anything else. As soon as he landed on Rainbow Dash’s back, I heard a popping sound. Rainbow Dash screamed and collapsed as Mario rolled off her back and onto the ground. Fluttershy galloped over to Rainbow and asked her what hurt. “MY WING! HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH, BUD??” Mario was still too stunned to even hear her, despite how loud Rainbow Dash was yelling. He looked around, absolutely confused. “Mamma-mia! What’s-a goin’ on here? Where-a the heck am I?” It took him a second to realize that Toad, Princess Peach, and I were all there. When he spotted us, he ran to the Princess and took off his cap. “Aww, how touching! Such respect!” Discord said in a sarcastic tone. And he was right! You make sure you show the Princess the respect she deserves if she ever comes around, but no sarcasm! Anyway, before Mario had a chance to say anything, Princess Celestia gave an order: “My little ponies! Now! Before he has a chance to cause any more trouble!” Rainbow Dash painfully got to her hooves and pulled out a golden collar, seemingly from nowhere. Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Rarity did the same, while Twilight took out what looked like a crown. Each piece of jewelry displayed the shapes of their respective cutie marks, though each was a different color from the rest. “So soon? That’s harsh, Celestia,” Discord sarcastically remarked, as if he was expecting something. “This time you’ll stay stone! NOW, GIRLS!” Twilight yelled. Their collars and crown began to glow, then they shot out beams of colored light that struck Discord. As he slowly turned to stone, Discord got in one last word: “Have a nice trip home! Don’t get stuck in any loops! HA HA!” He continued laughing as the stone enveloped his body from the bottom up. When the transformation was finished, a paw was in the air, a claw was on his gut, and his mouth was wide open. All of us, including Mario and Princess Peach, went back to Fluttershy’s cottage. The Crusaders ran off, though— Scootaloo was devastated when she saw Rainbow Dash screaming about her wing, so Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle had to comfort her and reassure her that Dash would be fine. After a thorough analysis, Fluttershy determined that Rainbow Dash’s left primary wing joint had been popped out of place. Mario apologized many times over and swore he would start losing weight. I was quite happy to hear that… Princess Celestia paced about Fluttershy’s living room, pondering the situation. Rainbow Dash not being able to fly was a problem— we needed a way to get up to the portal. Fluttershy didn’t have the strength to carry Mario, Toad, Peach, or I, and Celestia had to be back in Canterlot as soon as possible (with Discord’s statue). She was only staying at the moment to help us figure out a way to get home before the portal closed. We had no time to even explain to Mario and Princess Peach what was going on, so they were just standing stock still watching Celestia pace and yammer to herself about how to get four beings into the air at the same time. She thought about asking some of the other citizens of Ponyville, but she was afraid that Mario’s and Princess Peach’s appearance might frighten them. “I apologize, Mr. Mario, Your Highness. And you too, Yoshi and Toad. I have not had to deal with this kind of problem before. I have too many things floating through my head…” About two seconds after Celestia said this, I saw Mario’s eyes light up. “Wait-a just a moment… did-a you say ‘floating’?” He smacked himself in the forehead, then began rummaging through his deep pocket, looking for something. He eventually pulled out a large, round, light-blue fruit. “Why-a didn’t I think of this-a before? It’s-a lucky I had-a some left!” I couldn’t believe it— it was a Blimp fruit! If he had enough, that would be all the power I needed to get all four of us to the portal at once. Toad spoke up on my behalf. “Uhh…Mario? Aren’t those from the Tall Trunk galaxy? How long have you had those? How do they still look fresh?” “I honestly don’t-a know myself. They seem-a to last for years! I should-a have enough of them to get us all back to that-a portal, though! “What I want to know is, how long-a have you had-a THOSE?” He was pointing at Toad’s muscles. I never had a chance to ask him myself. Toad smiled and chuckled. “Not long. You can thank Miss Fluttershy here for that. She lent me her workout tapes right before we took that week of rest. Despite not being the same species, the routine seemed to work just as well, if not better and faster. And now you know why I’ve been staying in my new robe.” He happily put his robe back on, concealing his true physique, then he smiled at me and crossed his arms, leaning against the wall like he was posing for a modeling shot. I was confused— I looked at Fluttershy and asked her, “Workout tapes? Since when have you had workout tapes?” “Oh, I took an assertiveness class a while ago, and they came with the package as a bonus… I never used them, but I thought I would keep them just in case. I’m glad I did— I guess they actually were useful.” Toad piped, “Darn right they were. Thanks a ton! And thanks again for the robe. Best I’ve ever had.” “You’re very welcome.” Fluttershy smiled. "Maybe I can help you guys out from now on, huh?" Toad asked. I replied, "What about the conversation we had when you first got here? About not trying to play the hero?" "Meh. I’ve changed my mind. I'm not a big fan of the sidelines." Toad chuckled. Suddenly, Princess Celestia spoke. “My friends, I am sorry, but this is no time for chit-chat. Now that we have found a method to get you to the portal, we have to go. Now!” Everyone else’s eyes bulged as we glanced back and forth looking at each other as if thinking, Oh $#!+, how could we forget? As everyone started for the door, Celestia quickly said, “Fluttershy, I am sorry, but I need you to stay and take care of Rainbow Dash. We cannot leave her alone in this condition, and you are the best caretaker among us. Say your goodbyes now. I must leave for Canterlot.” Fluttershy and I rushed to each other for one last embrace. We didn’t hide it from anyone— we locked lips and cried as everyone else went outside after getting a good look. She pulled away from me after about ten seconds, and I caressed her mane one last time. I looked up and saw Angel at the top of the stairs with a smile and a tear in his eye, waving at me. I smiled and returned the wave, then turned and ran for the door. As I was the last one out, I slammed the door behind me and ran up the hill to where the portal waited, determined not to look back. As we gathered at the portal site, a few members short of the full farewell committee, we looked up and saw that the portal was closing rapidly. We had to get up there now. Mario, Peach, Toad, and I quickly gathered the blimp fruits we needed, all four of us holding one in case we needed that many. We looked around at everyone and said our goodbyes and thank-yous. After Mario, Peach, and Toad all climbed on my back, which was more weight than I was used to, I looked at them to make sure they were ready, and they nodded. It was time for the ride up. I shoved the first fruit into my mouth and felt my insides practically explode as my body expanded into a huge bubble. The ponies down below all gasped— they weren’t expecting anything like that. The first fruit brought us about a third of the way up. I started feeling heavy again, until Mario gave me the next fruit, which I quickly downed. As we continued climbing upward, I saw a familiar blue box with three ponies waving out of it not too far out in the distance. I waved back as best I could, then I saw the box vanish into thin air. Toad passed off the next fruit to Mario, who gave it to me for the next leg of the ascent. We were cutting it close— the portal was quite small now. Luckily, after I gulped down the next blimp fruit, we had only about 20 feet left, a distance which I easily covered before the portal closed. As we went through it, we found ourselves in darkness and immediately moving swiftly to our left, a feeling I was very familiar with. We were back in the warp pipe. Only seconds later, we popped out of the pipe here at Yoshi Island Junction. We were back home. Never in my life had I been happier… and more upset… than I felt right at that moment. And that... is the end of the story, from start to finish. I even included some of the ‘good stuff,' just like you asked. Now go finish your application or your mother is going to have my head!