//------------------------------// // Chapter Seven – Closing Doors // Story: A Certain Type of Chic // by WellKPony //------------------------------// Chapter Seven – Closing Doors Time appeared to stand still as the two unicorns looked at one another across the threshold. Twilight’s plans dissolved. Just seeing the other pony and knowing her, truly understanding what she was, was enough to fill Twilight with the purest desperation. She knew that this was her last chance and she knew that what she had intended on saying wasn’t good enough. Rarity fixed Twilight with a penetrating stare, her face betraying no hint of emotion. This didn’t bode well with Twilight. She felt very uncomfortable at that moment – more so than she had in her entire life. She looked down at her hooves to avoid the silver unicorn’s gaze before swallowing heavily and taking the plunge. “Hello, Rarity,” she said cheerily, smiling her most dazzling smile at the other mare. Rarity didn’t so much as blink. “I thought I would come by to see how you were doing,” Twilight ploughed on, undeterred. Nothing. “So... how are you doing?” she asked, feeling more than a little bit awkward. Rarity raised her eyebrow: “I’m just fine. Thank you for your concern.” “Oh, that’s good. I had hoped you would be.” Even to her own ears, it sounded lame, forced. She had gone about this in completely the wrong way. False smiles were not going to solve this. More silence. Twilight looked back at the ground, weighing up her options, but the lengthening silence and the deafening thud of her heart against her ribs were preventing her from bringing anything of her original plans to mind. She fidgeted a little, brushing some imagined dirt from her coat. Rarity rolled her eyes and moved to close the door, having seemingly grown tired of Twilight’s woeful attempts at reconciliation. “Well, if that’s all, I have some things I really have to attend to. Thank you for stopping by, Twilight. It was an absolute pleasure.” Twilight panicked. If that door closed with her outside, it was all over. It would be the end of her first foray in to love. It would be the end of her friendship with Rarity. It would be the end of her studies in Ponyville. It would be the end of everything good that she knew. She could not let that happen. Not now. Not without a fight. Summoning up every ounce of strength that remained within her, Twilight forced her hoof against the door, preventing it from reaching the jamb. “No, Rarity, wait!” she cried. The door opened again presenting a thoroughly unamused Rarity. She glared at Twilight, as though nothing would give her greater pleasure than to slam the door in her face. Twilight had never seen Rarity’s ire directed at her in this way. She cowered under this disapproving gaze. “Please. I’m sorry. I just want to talk. Will you not talk to me?” Twilight pleaded. Rarity’s fluttered her eyelids and gave Twilight a simpering smile of the kind that just oozes disbelief. She stepped towards Twilight, jabbing her hoof painfully in to the other pony’s chest. “You want to talk. You want to talk?!” she shrieked derisively, walking in quick circles around Twilight, “You’ve had more than your fair share of chances to talk! Maybe I don’t want to talk right now, hmm?” Twilight’s shoulders dropped. She didn’t want a confrontation. That wouldn’t help matters at all. Instead of arguing back, she stood quietly as Rarity continued her tirade. “It’s been a week now. Any time during that week you could have come over here to talk, but you didn’t. Yesterday afternoon, I tried to talk to you and you said you didn’t want to. I’ve waited and I’ve waited and I’ve waited quite long enough, wouldn't you agree?!.” Despite her anger, Twilight noticed a tear making its way down Rarity’s cheek as she spoke. That tear betrayed Rarity because it proved that she wanted this quarrel no more than Twilight did. And while that was still the case, there was hope. So she waited for Rarity to exhaust her anger, until she had finished saying everything she had to say.She understood why the other unicorn was so angry. She knew that she absolutely deserved to be shouted down in this way. It was this very feeling – that the other pony was justified in her anger – that stopped her from feeling sorry for herself. The gray mare stood breathing heavily in front of Twilight, her eyes still filled with an unmistakable malice. Twilight closed her own eyes and bowed her head in an act of humility, acknowledging everything Rarity had said. She knew she had done the other pony a great injustice. Understanding this, she knew that there was only one thing that she could say and she looked deep in to Rarity’s eyes as she said it. “I know. I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve for me to act like that and you have no idea how much I regret it. And this? All of this is my fault, I know it is. And I know it would be asking an incredible amount for you to forgive me, but that’s what I came here to do. I’m sorry, Rarity. I’m truly sorry,” Twilight finished in barely a whisper, fighting back tears. Rarity’s expression was unchanged. Twilight finally let her shoulders fall. She had no fight left in her. The battle was lost but for one final push. “I... I got your letter,” she told Rarity softly, her tears now flowing freely from her eyes, hardly daring to hope, “Last night. And I just want you to know that I read it and to say... to tell you... I love you Rarity. I would give anything to change all of this. Anything.” For one fleeting moment, Rarity’s features softened, seemingly against her will. With a quick shake of her mane however, she regained her composure, her eyes filled with hurt now as much as anger. “How can you come here now and tell me that?!” Rarity demanded, “After all of this, after how you’ve treated me, after how you‘ve insulted me, after how you repeatedly accused me of nothing less than lying about my feelings, do you really expect me to believe that?” Twilight looked away. She didn’t know what to say. In truth, she hadn’t really expected Rarity to believe it. Her assessment of the situation being accurate, Rarity had every right to doubt what Twilight was saying. After all, if the table had been turned, that’s exactly how Twilight would have felt. She looked back at Rarity and solemnly shook her head. “No. I don’t.” That wasn’t the answer the other pony had expected, if indeed she had expected any answer at all. She looked completely taken aback. The resentment on her face had all but dissipated. She looked like she had no idea what to say. “I don’t expect you to believe me, and I can’t prove it to you, but I can try,” Twilight intoned, repeating the words of Rarity’s letter back to her. Both ponies were silent for a moment, allowing Twilight to think of something to say. A warm breeze swept past as she looked deeply in to Rarity’s eyes. “I like to think that ponies can change,” Twilight began, ”If living here in Ponyville has taught me anything, it’s that. With everything we’ve been through together and everything we’ve learned from one another, I hope you can see that too.” Rarity found her voice, sounding now more saddened than anything else: “I do, of course I do. What I want to know is how you could possibly think that I only wanted to be with you because were Princess Celestia’s student?” Twilight had known that this was a question she would have to answer and the prospect frightened her. She had given a lot of thought to it through her sleepless night and she knew why she jumped to that conclusion. It was something she hadn’t wanted to talk about, but now there was nothing else for it. She bowed her head as she spoke, embarrassed by the truth. “I misjudged you, Rarity. I know that’s no excuse for how I acted, but that’s what happened. I assumed of you what I’d come to expect from everypony else and that was wrong of me. I should have known better but when something has been drummed in to you for so long...” Twilight paused briefly, not daring to look at the other unicorn. Rarity had, after all, exposed some of her most personal thoughts to Twilight to try to save their friendship. It was her turn. She took a deep breath, knowing that she had to do this. It was the only way. “I’ve never told anypony this but when I lived in Canterlot, a lot of the ponies at school would continually ask me questions about the princess. That’s all they ever wanted to hear about if they knew of my relationship to her. “It was the only thing about me they were interested in. They didn’t want to hear about the spells I had learned or my favourite songs or to listen to my jokes or my stories about my family. They didn’t care about my interests or my hobbies. They never wanted to play any games or just talk about anything else. All they wanted to know about was the minutia of what Celestia and I talked about. It’s why I never bothered trying to make any friends there. “So when I came here, I guess I expected things to be the same. Then I met the five of you and it was never like that. Except with you. At first anyway. But then I found out that you were just in love with Canterlot: the society, the ponies, the history and everything about the place and that it was your dream to be a part of that. I knew then that that you weren’t like those other ponies. “But first impressions die hard, I’m afraid, and I guess that’s why I jumped to the conclusions I did. “Then when I read your letter and your diaries, I knew I had made a mistake. I knew that you were nothing like those ponies. I should never have thought anything different. I’m so sorry, Rarity.” Twilight finished her story with the apology she knew she ultimately had to make. She waited for Rarity to say something, still unwilling to look up. She still felt ashamed of herself for letting her past rule her present, but what was done was done and all she could do now was hope that she hadn’t destroyed a perfectly good friendship because she couldn't forget her past. What felt like an eternity passed while she waited. Finally, after what may as well have been weeks, months or even years, she felt a hoof on her shoulder. She looked up to see Rarity gazing at her with concerned, perhaps even pity. It wasn’t what she had wanted, but to Twilight, anything other than the anger and fury of earlier was an improvement. Rarity didn’t hate her. That thought alone was a comfort. Even if they never became anything more than friends, that would be enough for her now. She still didn’t feel like smiling but she put her own hoof over Rarity’s as a silent mark of gratitude to the other pony. Rarity smiled weakly in response: “Perhaps you should come inside. I’ll make us some tea. Two lumps of sugar, yes?” Twilight nodded her assent, following Rarity in to the shop and once they were both inside, closed the door behind them. * * * * * The next few weeks passed with a remarkable calm, even by Ponyville standards. The only event of any note was a short spell of heavy rain which disrupted the weeks of beautiful sunny weather that had gone before. Yet even that had only been worth mentioning because it had come and passed so suddenly. Now, the weather was as fine as it had ever been. The stiflingly warm air of yet another glorious afternoon created a detached haze in Twilight’s mind and sent her drifting through another book related daydream. She closed her novel, having read the last page and absent-mindedly imagined herself in the role of the fictional heroine of her story, one Amethyst Sky. It wasn’t the kind of book she would usually read. In it, a beautiful mare, Amethyst, had been condemned by her family’s wealth and connections to marry somepony she didn’t love. The ending had been so delightfully predictable: the colt of Amethyst’s dreams came charging in and proclaimed his undying love to her. The two had then run off to start a new life together, free from the shackles of her parents outdated views on love. Twilight sighed. Fluttershy had lent it to her, insisting that it was a masterpiece and whilst Twilight couldn’t agree with this evaluation, she could see why the pegasus liked it so much. With this kind of subject matter, she reflected, no mare was ever more than a warm afternoon or a relaxing bath away from an hour in the arms of her prince. Yet no matter how real it might seem, it was still nothing more than a daydream. In reality, she could never hope to be like Amethyst. Her parents weren’t rich, she wasn’t betrothed to some repulsive oick and as time went on, it was seeming less and less likely that the mare of her dreams would come for her. Relations with Rarity had steadily improved since Twilight had made her apology. They had spent some time together with friends since then – not alone, never alone – and everything seemed to be returning to normal. Much of Twilight was glad that things had turned out okay and that they were able to be friends again. Still, though, she was left feeling bereft. Twilight’s mind retreated back to that morning at Rarity’s. Rarity had made the proffered tea and they had drunk it. It was as good as Twilight had ever had. It was Rarity’s tea, after all, something that nopony else could make. Afterwards, they had talked. At first about nothing at all; what does one talk about at a moment like that? Then gradually the conversation had found its way back to the matter at hoof. Rarity had apologised for having been so quick tempered with Twilight. Twilight had apologised again for overreacting to Rarity’s comment and Rarity had finally accepted. Twilight had enquired where they were to go from there and Rarity had replied that she didn’t know. A long silence had followed this exchange before Twilight thanked Rarity for her hospitality and left. A tear trailed its way down Twilight’s cheek as she remembered. At the time, she had simply been glad that the other pony was willing to forgive her. It had been consolation enough that they could go back to being friends. Since then however, she had come to realise that she needed more than that. And the worst part of feeling like this was that she could do nothing about it. Irritated, Twilight swiped at the tear, stood up and began pacing. She had already spent countless hours concocting spurious plans to try to get back in Rarity’s favour. She had considered everything from buying her extravagant and expensive presents to learning a spell which would allow her to make any gemstone shine with a dazzling fire. However it occurred to her that Rarity would most likely see through these gestures and Twilight didn’t want to risk their recovering friendship by forcing the issue. There was no point in dwelling upon it any further. It would do nothing to help her feel better. What might make her feel better would be seeing one of her friends. She stood, picking up the finished book and putting it in her saddle bags. Fluttershy would be glad to have it back. Slinging her bags over her back, she trotted from the library. The walk to through Ponyville was pleasant enough. When she arrived at Fluttershy’s cottage, Twilight knocked gently at the door and moments later she was being ushered in to its comfortably decorated interior. She sat down on one of the squashy little armchairs. “Oh, it’s so nice to see you again, Twilight,” said Fluttershy. Twilight smiled at her friend and opened her bags to retrieve the novel: “It’s great to see you too. I thought I would come over to return your book. It was a wonderful read.” “I’m so glad you liked it. It’s one of my favourites,” Fluttershy replied, “I just love the part where Amethyst meets Charming for the first time... it’s so magical.” Twilight had taken great pleasure in reliving that particular scene one night while she took a bubble bath. She nodded in agreement. They discussed the book in great depth. It was strange to hear Fluttershy talking at such length and so passionately about anything apart from her animals. Twilight largely just sat and listened, enjoying hearing the pegasus’ take on the story and only giving her opinion when it was asked for. Soon Fluttershy was dreamily recounting the plots of other similar stories she had read, though it seemed to Twilight that she was purposely minding what she said. She then proceeded to show Twilight her collection of romance novels. There were only about a dozen or so crammed in to a small corner of her bookcase but they were all very well worn. Twilight was offered another, but she declined politely. She couldn’t risk another fortnight of pining after what might never be. The conversation progressed on to more everyday things. Twilight could see what the other pony was doing. She had clearly realised that all this talk about romance and true loves was making Twilight feel bad. Yet despite her best efforts to help, her avoiding the subject wasn’t really helping matters. It was the same as when Twilight had asked to borrow the book. Fluttershy had been quite unwilling to lend it out in the first place because she had just talked Twilight round from her distress at the Rarity situation and felt that reading something like that would simply make it worse again. She had been right of course. Now, she was simply trying to avoid talking about it at all. Twilight listened to her go on about a picnic she had had with some of her critter friends, not thinking this evasion to be too unusual. Fluttershy hated confrontation in all of its forms. In addition, Rarity was her best friend so she wouldn’t want to say anything that might get back to her. Just as Twilight was beginning to relax a little, their conversation was interrupted by a knock at the door and Fluttershy flew away to answer it. When she returned, she had her head bowed nervously, almost apologetically. Twilight looked at her questioningly, but the pegasus would not return her gaze. Moments later though, Twilight understood the meaning of the other pony’s dismay as out from behind her stepped Rarity. The unicorn looked around the room, spotting Twilight and giving her a bright smile. “Hello, Twilight! Oh this is just perfect. I have some amazing news. I was going to come by and tell you later on, but now I can tell you both at once,” Rarity exclaimed It wasn’t perfect at all. This was the type of thing Twilight had been hoping to avoid. She had hoped for a thoroughly Rarity free afternoon. Not that she hadn’t wanted to see her, just that she had wanted some time to try to get over her. As it was, she would probably go home feeling worse than she had when she arrived. A small amount of time passed during which nopony said anything. Fluttershy continued to stand behind Rarity, looking embarrassed which in turn caused Twilight to feel awkward. It was as though the pegasus thought it was her own fault that she hadn’t considered that Rarity might stop by. Rarity, on the other hand, appeared completely oblivious to the reasons for the silence. She stood, her eyes glittering with excitement as she revelled in the silence she felt that she had created by announcing the good news but not what it was. She loved her dramatics. It was one of those little quirks that endeared her so much to Twilight. “Well? What’s happened?” Twilight asked, dutifully playing along with Rarity’s theatrics. “Well,” Rarity began with delight “While I was working on a commission for a client, I received a letter from Saddles and Sequins magazine. As you’re probably aware, they hold a fashion show every year to showcase the best dressmakers in the run up to the Grand Galloping Gala. And this year, they’ve asked me to display some of my work. Not only that, but this year’s event is to take place right here in Ponyville!” Twilight and Fluttershy galloped over to Rarity to congratulate her. This was some very good news indeed. Twilight knew of the show. It had been held in Canterlot a number of times while she was a filly. Her mother had attended it once, in fact. The biggest names in fashion paraded the very best of their designs every year. A regular spot in this show could spell big things for Rarity. Twilight tentatively enveloped her in a hug which the other pony returned with gusto, grinning madly. Rarity looked excited fit to burst. She deserved this though. She worked so hard, it was only fair that she was recognised for it. Twilight released Rarity and the unicorn immediately began bouncing around the room, using Fluttershy’s antimacassars as mock dresses as she acted out her would-be models poses and facial expression. Fluttershy joined in with the charade. Twilight sat back down, laughing as her two friends shared their joy on this wonderful occasion. It was impossible not to be caught up in it, after all. The only thing that could have made it better was if Rarity was telling her alone. Perhaps they could have shared the joy in quite a different way... Twilight shook the thought out of her head. No, this was enough. She eventually gave in to temptation and joined the two ponies in their games, enjoying the simplicity of it all. Yet even as she told herself it was enough, even as she threw herself headlong in to the celebrations, she couldn’t help but watch Rarity with the greatest longing in her heart.