Chapter 3: Split Feelings
After spending hours upon hours of "shopping" (browsing for things too expensive for me to ever afford), I basically fell into bed, instantly falling asleep.
Classes. Something I'd not attended in a LONG time. I had a pretty busy schedule of classes, lasting practically all day. It was just as expected, dead-eyed students and a dread-voiced professor for basically every class. I really was regretting this choice to go to this college, even if it was enabling me to get a better education, and job, and paycheck, and so on.
It was around 8:30 PM when I got home, but with reason. I'd gotten something so useful, so amazing, that it was something I 100% totally needed entirely to survive. Okay, maybe not. I got a coffee maker. I mean, who doesn't want one of those? Bitter, high-caffinated, over-heated drinks in the morning, just the thing. Throw in some of the sun's ability to always get in my eyes, and you've got the dream-morning. I had no classes with Serenity, which was disappointing, but, she did live right next to me.
***
After about a week of classes, coffee, blinding light, and lectures, I had a day off. I slept in, skipped the coffee, and spent the day out in the city, like a real tourist. After the long day, I returned to my dorm, to find.....
Everything as normal.
Being that my dorm wasn't broken into and I didn't have to engage in some giant fight against a billion 1-thousand foot-tall ponies to win back the safety of the world, I calmly flopped down onto my bed, only to hear a knock on my door. Perfect timing, as always. I groaned, forcing myself up to go answer the door. As expected, Serenity sat, smiling warmly. Without a word, I let her in, closing the door lazily.
"How's it going?" She asked, sounding happy as normal.
"Tired." I said. "Spent the day sight-seeing."
"You went without me?" She asked, sarcastically. "We should go together sometime. Seriously."
My heart skipped a beat as I sat down. Did she just invite me to a date? "Uh.. Sure, I guess... Sounds fun."
Serenity put her arm around me. "Anything been going on lately?"
"Rainbow Dash sent me an email... She said she had a surprise for me next month." I paused, thinking. "I dunno what it could be, I mean, she said she couldn't come with me, because she just couldn't afford it, and she didn't want to leave all her friends and everything behind..."
"Maybe its....." Serenity turned her head. "Humph. You'd probably have the better guess, sense you're dating her and all..."
"She's pretty un-predictable at times, honestly." I said. "You can't really ever predict what she'll do."
We sat there in silence for a long time, just staring out the window. It was strange. Serenity turned to look at me, and that's when I realized her eyes. They were entrancingly amazing, contrasting her coat, in perfection. We both leaned into each other, our lips meeting in a perfect kiss. Slowly, We wrapped our arms around each other, getting more and more into the kiss. I hugged her tightly, as she did me. I slowly opened my eyes, seeing that Serenity had done the same. I stared into her eyes, as she did me, our lips locked in perfection.
"No!" I cried out, gently pushing Serenity back, breaking the kiss. "I... I..." I cheated on Rainbow Dash.
"Trivium..... I'm so sorry.... It's just..."
"We...."
"There was..."
We struggled, searching for a reason, other then the fact that we were in love.
"I can't do this to Rainbow Dash......" I couldn't lie to her either. "I.... Love..... You...."
Serenity remained silent, staring into my eyes. "You cannot control who you love, Trivium."
"But I should be able to control myself...." I sighed. "I can't lie to her.... I will have to be honest with her sometime..." I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. How could I just do that to her? After all she did for me? What was she going to say? How would she react? Will she forgive me?
"I.... I think I should go... I'm sorry... I will talk to you later.... I guess..." Serenity basically sprinted out the door.
I sat against the wall, my face in my hooves. It was a big deal, me losing control. I loved two ponies, each of them were willing to sacrifice for me. I knew one way, or the other, my heart would be broken, my life changed.
***
I wasn't sure how long it was until I heard another knock. It was still late at night. I walked up and opened the door, to find Serenity standing, a sad look on her face.
"We need to talk." She said.
I reluctantly let her in, both of us walking to the bed and sitting down.
"We... Made out. You confessed you loved me, correct?" She asked.
"Yeah..." I felt my face grow hot.
"Well... Things just got... Carried away..." She said. "You loving me, is completely fine... You cannot control it..."
"But I should be able to control myself!" I cried out, breaking down. "It's my fault..."
Serenity wrapped her arms around me silently.
"We've had issues before... She'll leave me for good this time.... I can't live without her!" I'd completely lost it, crying in Serenity's arms, saying all these things. Serenity stayed quiet, patting my back softly. "I don't want to lie... But I don't want to hurt her..."
***
I slowly woke, finding myself resting on Serenity's chest like I used to Rainbow Dash. Her head hung to the side, evidently she'd stayed up a while. I slowly moved, feeling embarassment that I'd cried myself to sleep in her arms like that. I decided to move her first, because she must not've been comfy. I gently lifted her, slowly putting her back down on the bed normally. I slipped a pillow under her head, and slid a blanket over her, pausing to notice how amazing she looked. I promtly layed down on the floor, using my own arm as a pillow. It wasn't nice feeling, but I wasn't about to risk getting in bed with Serenity.
I woke a while later, to find that I was in the bed, and Serenity had left. There was a note on my monitor, clearly from Serenity.
"I hope you wind up feeling better. Even if we've had personal experiences, I will still take care of you, regaurdless of the situation."
I felt even more embarrassed, she's not only held me while I broke down, but she put me back in bed after she woke up. I sighed, my mind wandering to what the surprise Rainbow Dash had for me could be.