//------------------------------//
// Departure 
// Story: Smile 
// by Purple Tea 
//------------------------------//

	"...my body felt weak, broken almost. Like some little screw had come undone from my bones and they’d collapse into a pile of broken parts. Broken parts that couldn't  be fixed by sweets! Can you imagine that? Some days I couldn't even lift my head, others I was fine from morning 'till afternoon. But out of nowhere, I'd just collapse, unable to breathe.
“I'd lost a bit of weight by that time and the Cakes were worried. They had me stay inside the shop at all times and I wasn't allowed to visit anypony. They would have to come to the shop to speak with me.
“We weren't sure what it was at first. The symptoms were really weird. Mister Cake thought I was just a little light-headed. He had me eat twice as many sweets as I usually did. And I did. I would eat them, all of them. It was like my body constantly needed more and more."

Rainbow nodded, though she hadn’t found any of this particularly odd. Pinkie was well-known for her ability to knock back more sweets than anypony and without consequence. She'd been able to do it since they were fillies. It was a talent little Rainbow Dash had been very envious of.
"Nobody was really all that worried. I mean, I was tired lots, but I was okay. Once we realized it didn't seem to be infectious, I was able to help bake again. I made tortes and pies and macaroons, mmm they even let me eat on shift! I'm never allowed to do that, Rainbow Dash, never! But Mrs. Cake was worried I'd pass out again, so she told me to eat as much as
I liked, as long as I left enough for the customers."
"Wow, that sounds like heaven, Pinkie Pie."
Other than the collapsing, nothing seemed wrong. Rainbow couldn't seem to figure why the Cakes would just up and leave, especially without their star baker. It just wasn’t like them. They loved Pinkie like a daughter. 

"Oooh, it was. But only for an itty, bitty bit. Then some other things happened."
"What kind of things?"
"One day, around the end of July, I was busy making chocolate bark for Ms. Bon-Bon and I was chop, chop, chopping and ended up nicking my hoof. It wasn’t very much at all. I mean, I’ve nicked my hoof much worse before. One time I even cut off a bit of my mane. So I thought nothing of it. I got up and went to rinse and bandage the blood away. But the blood kept seeping through the bandage, so I put on another one and another one and another one. But it wouldn’t stop. 
“I didn’t want to scare anypony, so I called Mrs. Cake to the kitchen to see what she could do. She was pretty good at it, almost as good as Nurse Redheart. She took gauze and wrapped it around my bandages and at first I was scared the blood was going to show again, but it didn’t. Mrs. Cake took over for me after that and told me to rest. She had to start the bark batch all over again because I’d accidentally gotten onto some of the pieces and it wasn’t safe to eat anymore.” Rainbow Dash cocked her head, highly suspicious of this new information. This wasn’t the usual bout of light-headedness. It was something much worse and the Cakes must have noticed. Hadn’t they?
“Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash sighed. She leapt from her chair and started for her friend, “Did the Cakes try taking you to a real doctor?”
Pinkie nodded.
“R-really? Was he able to diagnosis you?”
Another nod.
“So there must be some solution, right?” 
This time Pinkie shook her head from side to side, “No cure.”
“Huh?”

“I said, there’s no cure. Something’s happened in my body. I’m this really weird kind of sick. They gave me this syringe-thingy and I was supposed to use it every time I ate a sweet. It had this weird, clear substance in it, and I was really, really scared.
“Doctor Whooves said it would only pinch a bit. And it was better than not eating any sweets at all, right? But there was this look in his face. Like there was something else he didn’t want to say. It took a bit of badgering, but he finally said that I was ‘too far ahead,’ that ‘the insulin would do nothing more than help ease the symptoms.’”
“I-I don’t understand?”
“Neither did I. Mrs. Cake was really sad and stuff. She kept crying and saying, ‘why’ over and over again. I tried asking what was wrong, but Mr. Cake told me to wait in the other room while they talked. I didn’t hear much, only snippits. There was something about time, I think. I didn’t have enough time or something along those lines. I didn’t really get it then, but I think I kinda get it now.”
“What do you mean?”
Pinkie shrugged and said, “I wasn’t allowed to be around the sweets anymore. I wasn’t even allowed to come down from my room. Mrs. Cake had me stay over Twilight’s library a couple of times, but that was more so toward the end, around when they left. And I’m still sad and all, but seeing you today so fresh and new and already always moving forward, it’s like, that’s the past and this now, you know?”

“I think.”
“But, what am I supposed to do? Making candies, and cookies and cakes, that was my job. Without that, I’m nothing. I’m a useless pony.”
“Useless? Really Pinkie Pie?” Rainbow prodded her friend’s thigh, “Remember this, your cutie mark? This is your job, Pinkie. It’s your destiny.
“You’re not useless. You’re a very important pony. You may like to make cakes and candies and other desserts, but that’s just  a little part of you.”
Rainbow reached for her friend and pulled her into another embrace, “You make people smile, Pinkie. That’s a totally huge job in itself.”
“But-”
“Do you even know how much sadness’ there is in the world? How much fear and tears? Do you know how amazing you are Pinkie Pie? You are stupendous, amazing, and about twenty percent cooler than any other mare I know.”

“T-thank you, Dashie.” The cyan pony smiled at her friend’s response, her cheeks glowed rosy as Pinkie returned her nuzzle. “I wasn’t even close to being done yet,” Dash added, “There’s a lot more cool stuff about you, I just ran out of adjectives.”
Pinkie Pie couldn’t help herself any longer. She giggled, a really, loud Pinkie-giggle. There was a  warmth spreading through the broken earth pony. It swept through her body, her bones, and finally ended with her heart. It wasn’t all at once, but as the hours passed and the two spoke, Rainbow Dash could see Pinkie had returned to her old self. First there was her smile, her laugh. And then finally, her mane, which popped back to life with great vigor.
“Hey, I want to show you something.” Rainbow nipped her friend’s ear, and gently pulled her toward the bakery’s door. Though it had only felt like minutes to the two ponies, hours had passed since Rainbow first entered through that very same entry. Outside, the two could see Luna had taken over for her sister. Her moon stood over Ponyville, bright and welcoming. 
“Dashie, you-you missed your meeting, didn’t you?” Pinkie said, her voice rather quiet, 
“Yeah, but it’s okay. This was more important.”
Rainbow lifted her eyes to the sky. With the bright moon above her, she could just barely make out the city of Cloudsdale. Somewhere up there, Coach First Flight and Blue Cloud were sitting side by side with Spitfire, probably commenting on how unreliable Rainbow Dash was over warm cups of cider and pictures of her campers.
Pathetic, Spitfire would snort, shaking her head at the thought, real Wonderbolts are always on time. They remember their important engagements. 
Rainbow sighed at the thought, but didn’t make any move to spread her wings. Pinkie Pie had needed her and Pinkie Pie was what was important. 

“Rainbow Dash?”
Rainbow pulled herself away from her inner argument, and turned her attention back to her friend. Pinkie stood with her head held high, eyes focused intently on the moon. Her breathing was very deep as if she were trying to take in as much of the scenery as she could.
“Hm?”
“Do you see the stars up there?”
“Yeah.”
For a moment Pinkie Pie was silent. She plopped her rump down onto the steps of Sugarcube Corner, never taking her gaze from the sky.
“I think I finally understand why the Cakes left me. You helped me figure it out.”
“What do you mean?”
Pinkie Pie took another deep breath, filling her cheeks and her throat until she was about to burst. Don’t cry! Don’t cry! “I- I think they were trying to protect me.” She stopped with a shaky gasp, “I t-think they realized that their business was only hurting me. Being surrounded by sweets day after day, they must’ve thought it was tearing me apart inside. And then the goodbyes. I-think they loved me Rainbow Dash.”
“Pinkie, I know they loved you.”
“Yes, but, I think they c-couldn’t say g-goodbye, because they were scared they would change their mind. That they would stay and continue to h-hurt me. I think they miss me.”
“I bet they do. A whole lot. I know I’d miss you Pinkie Pie.”
“You would?”
The cyan pony tapped her chest, right above the spot where her heart was, “So much, it’d hurt.”

Pinkie grinned, her own heart swelling at the words. She knew her friends loved her and that she loved them just as much, if not more. It was unspoken knowledge. That was just what best friends did, they loved each other despite their faults. But hearing Rainbow Dash openly say, what nopony ever had, was just too much for the pink pony. She continued to focus on the moon above her, afraid that if she even glanced at Rainbow Dash, she’d break down again.
“Rainbow.”
“Yeah.”
“Can I tell you something?”
“Sure.”
“When I was little filly, way before I even came to Ponyville, I used to live on this farm with my parents, my sisters, and my grandmother. About a month before my sisters and I were supposed to head down to Ponyville, my grandmother passed away.”
“I didn’t know you had a grandmother. I’m sorry.”
Pinkie shook her head, “No, no. There’s no need to be sorry. She was ready to go. But I was a mess. I cried all the time, and even stopped eating for a while. Papa Pie was really worried about me. He sit with me for hours on end, trying to get me out of bed. Finally one night, he picked me up and carried me outside on his back. He said, ‘Look Pinkamena. Look at the stars.’ So I did. Without the lights like we have here in Ponyville, there were so many stars and they seemed to go one forever.”

“That must’ve been some sight.”
“It was. He asked me, ‘Would you like to hear a story?’ And I nodded. I loved stories. I still do. So he settled down into the dirt, and I climbed from his back. He nuzzled me close, told me how much I meant to him. Then he started the story. He said, once upon a time, way before the Princess Celestia or Luna, there was a small town of ponies. In this small town there was one family in particular. There were only two ponies in this family, a papa and his daughter. The mama pony had died a long time ago, back when the filly was born.  The daughter always had guilt for this, as she thought it was her birth that had caused her father so much emotional pain. She wanted to help him,and fix her wrong. Being young and unable to really comprehend death, she thought that she could make substitutions. The filly tried many times to take her own life and thought that by doing so she could restore her mothers'. Desperately she held knives to her throat, climbed the highest of heights, and even contemplated drowning herself in the nearby river. But she was never able to fulfill the attempts. She was afraid, very afraid of what waited for on the other side, and because of this she did not succeed in her suicide.”

Rainbow released a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. The air blew from her lips, as if she were pushing the anxiety from her body.
“As the filly grew, she began to question her past actions. One day, as a young mare, she confessed to her father what she'd been trying to do. 'I'm sorry,' she cried, 'I wanted to bring mama back for you, but I couldn't do it. I am selfish.' 
“Her father listened to her confession with open ears and a gaped mouth. He was surprised his daughter had thought such terrible things about herself. He tried to console her, tried to tell her how special and beautiful she was, but she refused to listen. The following night, he had once last idea. And with a bit of coaxing he was able to pull his daughter outside. 'Look up,' he instructed. Despite her suspicions the mare obeyed, she look up high into the sky, but saw nothing but black.
“'Not there,' her father replied, 'there.' He lifted a hoof and pointed high above their farmhouse. It was tiny, but the mare could just make it out. A small glimmer was in the sky, glowing bright.
'What is that thing?' Asked the daughter, as she had never seen such a sight before.
'That is your mother,' the father replied, 'She has come down from where it is ponies go after death. She's come to speak with you, and ask that you cease harming yourself. Though she can't speak to you directly, she's come now to watch over you, and prevent harm.'
'Isn’t she angry?'
'At you, my dear? Why of course not. She loves you very much with every bit of her heart. Seeing you in such pain as wounded her. She's afraid of the way you talk to and threaten to harm yourself.'
'But how do you know?' The mare retorted, 'You can't speak with her, can you?'
'No I cannot. But I can see her clear as day. She's up there watching you, glowing bright with her love.'
The mare was unable to say another word, she took her father's reply to heart. And with a smile, she looked to the star and nodded."

"Wow."
"That's exactly what I said! I asked, 'Papa, is there any ponies watching over me?' And he nodded. He pointed to a star directly overhead. "All stars are ponies that have come to watch over their loved ones. This one popped up a couple of nights ago. I wasn't sure who it was at first, but the way it glowed and shimmered, I could tell it was somepony important.   And then I remembered my mother, how strong she was despite her age, how rough and angry she always seemed. And I remembered how you, Pinkamena, were able to make her smile and laugh and I realized that it was her, come down from wherever it is ponies go after death, to watch over you. She sees that you're not smiling anymore, and that worries her. So she's come to make sure you giggle again and grin.'
'Really?' I'd gasped, and Papa had said, 'Really. And one day I'll be up there too, watching over you and your sisters.'"
Rainbow didn't know how to reply to that. The story was powerful to say the least. Pinkie Pie turned her attention to Rainbow and asked, "You would never hurt yourself would you, Rainbow?"

"No never," the multiple-colored mare retorted, "It's against Equestrian law."
"I know that, silly. But what if you were really, really sad? Like if it hurt very much to get up and move the clouds? Or if you couldn’t even fly? What if you couldn’t do a Sonic Rainboom again?"
"Um, I-I guess? “ Rainbow struggled to think of losing her ability, losing what made her special and set her apart from other ponies. “I don’t know, Pinkie Pie.”

“What if, you lost someone special?”
“What do you mean?”
Pinkie leaned into her friend, intertwining her puffy pink tail with Rainbow’s multi-colored one, “What if you lost me?”
“Pinkie! That’s an awful thing to say!”
But what if she did lose her? Rainbow scattered her thoughts of Spitfire, the Wonderbolts, and whatever else she’d been thinking about. She started with a clean slate and placed Pinkie Pie in the middle. She filled the background with the colors of her home, Ponyville. She saw Twilight outside her library and Rarity with a sewing pin between her hooves. There was Applejack with her cart full of fruit and finally Fluttershy with her animals. She tried to imagine picking them away one by one, until only Pinkie remained. Then, she attempted to remove the pink pony bit by bit. She imagined picking away her mane, her tail. Little bits of her that seemed insignificant, until finally only her voice remained, echoing loudly in Rainbow Dash’s subconscious. 

Good morning! 

Come on let’s see a smile! 

Oooh, how about a cupcake with red and yellow and blue frosting? Doesn't that sound yummy? 

Dashie, I love you lots, I’ll write to you every single day.

She loved her friends; she really did with every bit of her heart. But there was something different about Pinkie, something that made her harder to remove than the others, “Pinkie Pie, what’s happening?”
“I already told you,” Pinkie replied, “I think I may be going soon.”
“But I didn’t think you meant-” Rainbow’s words fell short, as a hoof touched her arm. She focused her attention on the earth pony’s face. There were tears rolling down her cheeks, but she made no move to wipe them away. Her smile was still bright, showing all her teeth.
“I’m happy Twilight didn’t have to poof you down to Las Pegasus so I could say goodbye. It feels a lot better this way.”
“I’m not ready yet, Pinkie. I need you to stay.”
For the last time, Pinkie wrapped her arms around her cyan friend. “It’s going to be okay,” she cooed, “It’ll be alright in the end.”

“But Pinkie!”
“I told you that story for a reason. Were you listening closely?” Pinkie took Rainbow’s hoof in her own and together they pointed towards the sky, “I’m really, really ready Rainbow Dash. I know it’s going to be hard for everypony, myself included, but I just, I- I sense, it’ll be okay.” As if in response her tail began it’s signature twitch. 

“After I’m gone, I want you to look up, high in the sky. There will be a new star up there and I’ll try to shine as bright as I can so you find me easily. I’ll be there every night, watching over you and our friends. I want you to tell them and their fillies and your own fillies and your grandfillies, and your great-great grandfillies what happened here tonight. I want you to tell them I was happy. And that they should be happy too.”

Rainbow Dash wasn’t thinking clearly, her mind was unable to comprehend what she’d been hearing. This secret, this humongous secret her friends had kept from her despite her many letters to them. She could left early. Could’ve spent more time, here in Ponyville with Pinkie Pie. They could talked about so many more things. She would’ve defied Celestia herself, if it meant she could just have Pinkie Pie a little longer. “Pinkie. I need more time. There’s so many more things I need to tell you! So many things we have to do! Isn’t there some kind of transplant for this? Medicine you could take?”

“Dashie.”
“I-I know. I’m sorry.”
“Please. Don’t be. Don’t be sad either, okay? I need you to do one last thing for me.”
“Anything.”
“Dashie, you need to keep smiling. It's super duper important to me”

“O-okay.” Tears blurred the speedster’s vision until her friend was nothing more than a pink blob, “I-I can do t-that.”

“Pinkie-promise?”

With a deep breath, Rainbow dried the last of her tears from her eyes. Then, she spread her lips into the biggest smile she could. 


---
'Cause I love to make you smile, smile, smile!
Yes I do!
It fills my heart with sunshine all the while!
Yes it does!

'Cause all I really need's a smile, smile, smile
From these happy friends of mine!