Spaceballs- The Crossover

by Barrobroadcaster


Intelligent Life

"Hang on, I got it!" Rainbow Dash called out. The rainbow Pegasus flew like an arrow through the night sky towards a low-hanging cloud overhead. Just when she was about to fly into it, she performed a 180-degree turn in midair and flung her hind legs into it. The renegade cluster of vapor disintegrated in an instant leaving behind nothing but starry sky.

Her five friends sitting on the hilltop down below applauded her efforts as she descended to them.

"Excellent work, Rainbow Dash!" Rarity said.

"Told ya!" Rainbow remarked competitively. "Ten seconds flat, day or night. Heck, I could clear the skies blindfolded!" she declared.

"The stars look beautiful," Fluttershy said. The six ponies spread out on a blanket now had a breathtaking view of the Equestrian night sky.

Their pink friend Pinkie had a hoof raised to the sky. She pulled it back and fourth as she scanned the heavens.

"Pinkie? What are ya doing?" Applejack asked.

"Shh!" the pink mare shushed Applejack. This caused a few eyebrows to raise.

"Pinkie are you... counting the stars?" Rainbow Dash asked, questioning more than just Pinkie's actions. But Pinkie Pie continued gesturing above undaunted. Finally, she pointed to the sky in triumph.

"There! There it is!"

"What is it Pinkie?" Twilight Sparkle asked, walking over to her.

"It's Jeff, my star!" Pinkie answered. "I call him my STAR pupil!" she said with a chuckle.

"You have your own star, Pinkie?" Rarity asked, skepticism in her voice.

"Why wouldn't I? He's up there all alone..." she explained, her tone taking on a sad demeanor. "But when I found him, I decided to be his friend and name him Jeff! And he got a little bit brighter after that!"

"That's... touching, Pinkie," Rarity said. "And crazy, I think. But also touching."

Twilight walked back over to the telescope she'd set up. Carefully, she calibrated the instrument and looked through the eyepiece. With the clouds gone, her view of the sky was clear and she gazed at the heavens above.

"Whatcha doing over there, Twi?" Applejack asked, walking over to her.

"Testing out a new telescope. This one should be powerful enough to get a glimpse at some of the neighboring planets."

Applejack scratched her head, not quite understanding. "You're using that ta watch your neighbors?"

Twilight giggled. "Neighboring planets, Applejack. There are six other planets in our solar system."

"Six other planets?" AJ thought aloud. "Do any of em have apples or ponies on em?"

"Well, we don't know yet. Nopony's ever been to them yet. But one day, I'm hoping that we might travel to other planets and maybe even find other forms of intelligent life there. You wanna take a look?"

"Sure, Twi," AJ said, walking over. The six friends became quiet again as they stargazed, beholding the majesty of the heavens above them. Unbeknownst to Twilight and her friends, there was life on other, far-away planets just waiting to be discovered. Elsewhere in the galaxy, there were even other intelligent forms of life.

And then there were these guys.

Soaring somewhere through the inky blackness of the night was Eagle 5, the space-faring Winnebago of the recently-crowned Prince Lone Starr. Recently married to Princess Vespa of Planet Druidia, he and his friends Barf and Dot Matrix were taking a well-deserved vacation after having saved the galaxy from the nefarious Spaceballs.

Barf was sitting in the copilot's chair, lazily looking out at the starscape when the cockpit door opened. He looked over his shoulder to see his friend and captain step through.

"Hey hey, boss. Consecrated the old marriage?"

Lone Starr took off his hat and whapped his friend with it for being vulgar.

"Ow, what was that for?!" Barf complained.

"I'm married now, watch it with that kind of talk," he said, taking his seat at the pilot's chair.

"Sheesh, fine. Didn't know you two lovebirds were going to be so sensitive."

"Well, I am a prince and she does happen to be a princess. A little sensitivity might not kill ya, Barf."

"Just don't go getting your own set of matched luggage."

The console in between the two started beeping, indicated an incoming transmission.

"Looks like we got another call coming in. You want me to answer it?" Barf asked.

"Nah, I'll take this one. Been ringing off the hook since we left Druidia."

"Yeah," Barf chuckled. "Everyone wants to call up the new prince in town to sell him a timeshare."

Lone Starr keyed a few buttons on the console and the screen above the windshield lit up with the caller's face.

"Well, if it isn't the new prince in town," a familiar voice remarked.

Both Lone Starr and Barf almost leapt out of their seats when they saw who it was. "Vinny!" Lone Starr shouted.

The robotic mobster's head twitched sideways. "Ah, so you do remember. I'm touched, boys. I really am."

"So, eh, what's up, Vinny? You calling to congratulate us on the wedding?"

"Oh, of course, of course. May the blessings of the Spacemob descend upon you and whatnot. But this is not, as they say, a courtesy call. There's some business we need to attend to."

The two exchanged worried glances. "Uh... business? What kind of business?" Barf asked, nervously.

"The business about the million space bucks you owe Pizza the Hut."

"What?!" Lone Starr gasped in shock. "Why do we still owe you the money? We heard Pizza ate himself to death!"

Vinny twitched again. "Well, it turns out there was a little Pizza leftover." The camera panned to the right as a slice of the infamous gangster known as Pizza the Hutt came into view. He hung from a coatrack, two eyes and a tiny mouth the only things visible on the greasy underworld king-sized slice of pizza.

"Where's my money, boys?" the slice demanded.