Meanwhile, on the first floor of the ark, Adam and Bon Bon were patrolling the various pens. They visited all the animals to make sure they were being taken care of. Bon Bon allowed Adam to lead the way, since she didn’t want to risk him getting a good view of her from behind.
If any of the animals’ pens were in need of repair, Bon Bon would make a note of it. She wrote everything down using a piece of lead on a large leaf. She held the writing implement in her mouth and stored the leaf in a saddlebag when not in use.
“The ocelots’ food door is stuck,” Bon Bon said as she reviewed her notes, “And the aqueduct above the aardvarks’ pen is leaking.” Adam nodded in approval.
“Once we’ve finished patrolling this floor, we’ll give our report to Angel,” Adam said, “He’ll ensure that the sons of Noah make the necessary repairs.” As Bon Bon put her notes away, Adam glanced at her suspiciously.
“Steve,” Adam said, “I’m curious as to why you don’t use magic to hold the marking tool. I thought unicorns used their horns for everything.”
Bon Bon felt her heart skip a beat. It had only now occurred to her that, as a unicorn, she might be actually expected to do some magic. Adam stared at her quizzically as she tried to come up with an excuse.
“Well,” Bon Bon said, thinking fast, “I choose to avoid using magic because I don’t want to be tempted by the Devil. Sorcery and spellcraft are tools Satan uses to steal souls.” Bon Bon tried to look confident as Adam stared her down. He scrutinized her expression, as though he questioned her sincerity. Bon Bon made an effort to keep her body language as neutral as possible, lest Adam see through her deception. She breathed a sigh of relief when Adam eventually nodded his head and smiled at her.
“You’re very wise, young Steve,” Adam said, “I was merely testing your faith. If more unicorns thought like you and shunned their magical abilities, Satan wouldn’t have power over their souls.” Bon Bon felt relieved for having passed Adam’s inquisition. She was banking on the fact that he would equate anything foreign to him as evil. In spite of securing herself in Adam’s good graces, Bon Bon also had some questions for him.
“I know that magic is evil,” Bon Bon said, trying to sound sincere, “but why would God give me a horn if He didn’t want me to use magic?”
“A valid question,” Adam said, “God, in His infinite wisdom, imbued all His creations with certain flaws that they must overcome in order to be sanctified. Many are tempted by sins of the flesh, while others sell their souls for wealth and power. God’s trial for the unicorn race was to see if they could resist the temptation to use magic. In all cases, these trials were meant to test self control and obedience to God’s commandments.”
“I see,” Bon Bon said. She was beginning to understand Adam’s theology a little better. Self-sacrifice, self-denial and conformity were all strong tenants of his faith. She also couldn’t help but wonder if his hatred for magic stemmed from the fact that he was an Earth pony. Bon Bon smiled as she imagined Adam as a child being teased by unicorns using their magic to suspend him in the air until he cried.
“Most unicorns were unable to resist the allure of spellcraft and lost their souls as a result,” Adam said, solemnly, “Why do you think it was so difficult for Noah to find a pair of your species for the ark? Nearly all the unicorns were already in league with the Devil.”
Bon Bon nodded her head in agreement, even though she thought Adam was a raving lunatic. She actually tensed up when Adam put his forehoof around her back and tousled her mane affectionately with his other forehoof.
“Fortunately, God was watching out for you, Steve,” Adam said, “He put you in Noah’s path so you and your mate could survive the flood to rebuild the unicorn population.” Bon Bon pushed Adam away from her and sat on the ground with her hind legs crossed, so as to obscure her gender-specific parts from view.
“Still as bashful as ever, I see,” Adam said as he grinned knowingly, “Just remember, Steve, those who keep God’s commandments are blessed. You’ve already proven your worth by shunning magic and placing your faith solely with God! We’ve been given an unspeakable gift! A second chance at life! We can show the Lord that we’re worthy of His favor by repopulating the earth and teaching our children to fear God and keep His commandments.”
Adam had expected Bon Bon to shed tears of joy and shout praises to the Lord for His infinite mercy, but she instead became quiet and contemplative. The whole concept of God testing His creations consumed her thoughts. After a moment of silence, Bon Bon turned her head sharply and stared at Adam.
“So, is that what homosexuality was for the Sodomites?” Bon Bon said, somberly, “Just a test? If they wanted to pass, all they had to do was resist their sexual desires to gain God’s blessing?”
Adam was taken aback by Bon Bon’s confrontational attitude. However, he was willing to look beyond her disrespectful tone in the interest of further enlightenment.
“That would imply that God created homosexual desires, which He didn’t” Adam said, “The Lord would never design something so ill-conceived and utterly wasteful as sodomy. Homosexual lusts are the works of Satan.”
“But I thought God created everything,” Bon Bon said, “even our desires.” Adam glared at Bon Bon. They both became silent as they listened to the creaking of the ark. Adam’s expression became grave to the point where Bon Bon began to feel frightened. His menacing countenance was partially illuminated by the reflective glow of the fire.
“You’re playing the Devil’s advocate, Steve, and that’s a very dangerous game,” Adam said, threateningly, “The Sodomites engaged in vile acts which mocked the sacred rite of procreation. God did not create them that way. They chose to reject the Lord’s commandment to multiply and replenish the Earth. When the floodwaters came, those unrepentant Sodomaniacs discovered the wages of sin.” Bon Bon realized that all attempts to shift any blame away from the Sodomites was a losing battle. Adam was visibly shaken by Bon Bon’s insinuation that God might be responsible for homosexuals.
“In any case,” Adam said, shaking off his discomfort, “it’s a moot point now that every homosexual drowned in the Great Flood. The land will never again be blighted by their abominations.”
The next half hour of their patrol was awkward for both parties. Adam and Bon Bon only spoke to one another when reporting on the status of a pen. As Adam noticed Bon Bon’s sullen countenance, he began to feel guilty for losing his temper.
“Please forgive me for snapping at you, Steve,” Adam said, humbly, “I often forget how brash and impressionable you are. I know you didn’t mean to blaspheme the Lord with your comments. You’re just an exceptionally inquisitive young stallion and there’s no sin in that.” Bon Bon tried to smile, but the things Adam said made her want to cry.
“I think we’ve wasted enough time speculating on those damned colt cuddlers, eh Steve?” Adam said, “What’s say we have a nice candid discussion about mares?”
“Oh, this ought to be rich,” Bon Bon thought. In spite of how much Adam angered her, Bon Bon was determined to try her hardest to be friends with him. Adam just wanted another stallion to talk to. All Bon Bon had to do was pretend to be his friend for now. After she got off the ark, she’d never have to listen to his bigoted ramblings again.
“I’d enjoy that very much,” Bon Bon said, lying through her teeth, “Please instruct me on how to better please my wife.”
“If you want your wife to have confidence in you, the first thing you must to do is assert your dominance over her,” Adam said, “Never let her forget who’s in charge. Remember, a wife should always be submissive to the will of her husband as he submits to the will of the Lord.”
“What?!” Bon Bon asked, irritably. Her threshold for disgust increased with every misogynistic word that came out of his mouth.
“It is improper for a wife to ever disagree with her husband,” Adam said, “For the sake of this example, let’s have you pretend to be my wife. Think you can act like a mare, Steve?”
“It’ll be a challenge,” Bon Bon said, sardonically.
“Alright Steve, pretend the sun is shining brightly overhead,” Adam said, as he glanced up at the reflected light of the fire, which illuminated the ark, “I, your husband, look up and say, ‘Good Lord! How bright and goodly shines the moon this day.’ As my wife, how would you respond?” Bon Bon looked at Adam incredulously.
“As a good wife, I would correct my husband to prevent him from appearing foolish,” Bon Bon said, smugly, “I would inform him that it was the sun, and not the moon, which shone so brightly overhead.”
“Ah, but it is never the wife’s place to correct her husband,” Adam said, “If he is wrong, then she must be wrong with him.” Adam took a step closer to Bon Bon.
“I emphasize again that it is the moon that shines so bright this day,” Adam said, as he leaned in closer to Bon Bon. Adam looked down on her as a way to further intimidate and exert dominance, but Bon Bon didn’t flinch. She narrowed her eyes and stuck to her convictions.
“And I know it is the sun, my husband,” Bon Bon said, stubbornly. Adam smiled at Bon Bon’s performance. He assumed she was just acting the part of an exceptionally difficult wife. Adam was eager to demonstrate further dominance; he just didn’t realize how genuine Bon Bon’s irritation was.
“As my wife, it is your duty before God to agree with me,” Adam said. His face was now a mere few inches from Bon Bon. She blushed from the uncomfortable closeness. Bon Bon could feel her defiance ebbing away. At this point, she would say or do anything Adam wanted to increase the distance between them. Bon Bon backed away and bowed before Adam.
“You may call it the moon, the sun or a candle,” Bon Bon said, as she acquiesced to Adam’s browbeating, “Whatever you choose, it will also be so with me.” Adam smiled as Bon Bon prostrated herself before him.
“Excellent performance,” Adam said, “You have the makings of a convincing thespian.”
“A what?!” Bon Bon said, horrified. She instinctively jumped up and covered herself with her tail. Once she landed on the ground, she pressed her hind legs together. Bon Bon thought she heard Adam say something which compromised her disguise. Adam couldn’t understand her anxiety.
“What?” Adam said, “All I said was ‘thespian.’ I just thought you’d make a convincing actor.”
“Oh,” Bon Bon said, relieved, “I thought you said I’d make a convincing lesbian.” As soon as the words left her mouth, Bon Bon would’ve done anything to take them back. Bon Bon’s eyes went wide as she covered her mouth with her forehooves. Her words hung in the air like an unpleasant aroma. She couldn’t believe she made such a critical error. Adam cocked his head and stared at her.
“Now why would you think I called you a lesbian, Steve?” Adam said. Beads of nervous sweat formed on her brow. The wheels in Bon Bon’s head were turning as she tried desperately to salvage her embarrassing gaffe.
“Uh, because I have something in common with lesbians?” Bon Bon said, as she tried to keep her voice calm.
“Oh?” Adam asked, cautiously, “and what’s that?”
“We both love having sex with mares,” Bon Bon said with a sly wink. Adam gave a hearty laugh.
“I suppose you’re right, Steve,” Adam said, “I guess that makes us both lesbians!”
“Yeah,” Bon Bon said, laughing awkwardly, “You and I... A naughty pair of filly foolers.”
Adam led the way as they continued inspecting the rest of the pens on the first floor. As they walked, Adam continued to impart pearls of wisdom to Bon Bon; much to her resentment.
“An interesting fact about mare anatomy,” Adam said, ”did you know the word “vagina” actually means sheath?”
“Can’t say that I did,” Bon Bon said, dispassionately, “Please, tell me more.” Adam’s obliviousness to blatant insincerity had become a running theme by this point; so it was no surprise when he took her apathetic acquisitiveness at face value.
“You wouldn’t put two sheaths together by themselves, would you?” Adam said, as he marveled at the habits of lesbians, “An empty scabbard is worthless. A sheath only fills the measure of its creation when a sword is inside it. It’s no different with mares.” Bon Bon bit her tongue as she stared daggers at Adam.
“Males and females were intelligently designed to be together,” Adam said, as though it were the simplest concept in the world, “It’s astounding to me that the Sodomites remained blind to their own folly for so long. Couldn’t they see that their bodies weren’t compatible? What’s the point of intimately knowing your lover if not to bring children into the world?” Bon Bon was finding it increasingly difficult to hold her tongue. Before she could stop herself, she blurted out an accusatory question.
“What about having sex for pleasure?” Bon Bon asked. Adam was momentarily stymied by her outburst. He was a stallion of faith, but he also possessed a sex drive, which he was often at odds with. He took a deep breath and pensively exhaled before continuing.
“Well Steve, I suppose those who were unlearned in the Gospel could fornicate merely for carnal pleasure,” Adam said, “but once they better understood God’s Grand Design, they would come to realize that procreation is a sacred gift which should only be utilized between a husband and wife for the purpose of propagating their species. When acts of intimacy are experienced by those who aren’t married to each other, it goes against God’s will. The Sodomites were destroyed because God could no longer tolerate their unnatural fornication.”
“Do you think all the Sodomites deserved death?” Bon Bon asked, soberly. When Adam paused for a moment, Bon Bon was taken aback. She had expected Adam to denounce and vilify all homosexuals. Instead, it looked as though he was doing some serious deliberation before he answered.
“As a God-fearing pony, I’m expected to exhibit blind faith,” Adam said, “My devotion to the Lord is unwavering, but there are times when even I find his judgements extreme.” Bon Bon was stunned by Adam’s candid honesty. For a moment, she wondered if there was more depth to his character.
“I don’t want you to think I have naught but contempt for all Sodomites,” Adam said.
“Well, you were certainly giving off that impression earlier,” Bon Bon said, churlishly.
“As God as my witness, I feel pity for the lesbians,” Adam said.
“Oh?” Bon Bon said, bemused, “and why do you only feel pity for the filly foolers and not the colt cuddlers?”
“With the females of Sodom, it’s not their fault they all became disgusting tribbers,” Adam said, “I imagine that at one time they were delightsome and beautiful.”
“Before they became lesbians?” Bon Bon said in an irritated tone.
“Yes,” Adam said, “The fault really lies at the hooves of the stallions who were flighty in the fetlocks. Satan filled their minds with unclean thoughts, which caused them to abandon the natural use of their mares. The silly sods were consumed with lust for their own gender.”
“So why wouldn’t the mares share equal blame, then?” Bon Bon asked. As maddening as it was, she was determined to at least attempt to understand Adam’s logic.
“The mares couldn’t help it,” Adam said, “Without a husband to guide them through life, they were like ships without a rudder in a sea of temptation. In moments of weakness, the mares turned to each other for companionship.”
“Tragic,” Bon Bon said, apathetically.
“Almost makes me wish I had been there when I was still a bachelor,” Adam said, “My lover’s touch would’ve cured the Sodomite mares of their lesbianism.” For the first time since they started their discussion, Bon Bon felt the need to stifle her laughter.
“How selfless of you,” Bon Bon said, sarcastically, “Not every stallion would be willing to cure all those lesbians with sexual healing. I have to ask though, wouldn't such rampant promiscuity incur the wrath of God?”
“I have faith that the Lord would’ve forgiven my fornications,” Adam said assuredly, “After all, I would've been doing more than filling the measure of their creation; I’d also be saving their souls.”
“Saving their souls, while savoring their holes,” Bon Bon said, contemptuously, “Adam, you are positively primeval.”
“Why thank you, Steve,” Adam said, nonchalantly, “I’ve worked hard to become so. Stick with me and I’ll teach you everything I know.”
“Oh goody,” Bon Bon said, bitterly.
As the hours wore on, Adam and Bon Bon inspected each animal pen, while conversing with each other at length about life, love and salvation. While Bon Bon found Adam to be insufferable most of the time, he did have brief moments of likeability.
“Do you know why the Sodomites reviled Noah?” Adam asked.
“Because he told them to repent?” Bon Bon replied.
“They hated him because of his certainty,” Adam said, “Those who live without faith are often intimidated by those who believe in God; but this is nothing new. The wicked have always taken the truth to be hard.” Bon Bon believed in God, but not in the same way Adam did. She refused to believe she’d be condemned for following her heart, in spite of Adam’s insistence to the contrary. While Bon Bon disagreed with him on many issues, she was somewhat impressed by the strength of Adam’s convictions.
“I’m not as firm in the faith as you,” Bon Bon said, “How can you be so sure about everything?” Adam answered the question with a question that caught Bon Bon off guard.
“Do you love, Lyra?” Adam asked.
“What?” Bon Bon asked. She’d never vocally declared her love for Lyra to anyone before, other than Lyra, of course.
“Your wife Lyra,” Adam repeated, “Do you love her?” Adam’s face grew soft and kind as he looked tenderly at Bon Bon. He saw in her eyes the promise of hope and young love. Bon Bon felt a warm glow permeate her body as she expressed the innermost feelings of her heart.
“Oh yes,” Bon Bon said, “I love Lyra with all my soul.”
“That’s never going to change, is it?” Adam asked, knowingly.
“No,” Bon Bon said. She smiled sweetly as pleasant memories filled her mind. Her defenses, which she had so carefully guarded, were now being lowered in order to express her love.
“Nothing could ever cause your devotion to waver, could it?” Adam asked.
“Never,” Bon Bon said. As Adam spoke tenderly about Lyra and Bon Bon’s relationship, Bon Bon felt a lump form in her throat. For a brief moment, it was as though she had found acceptance aboard the ark. Her relationship with another mare was being lauded by a stallion who would condemn them both if he knew the truth. Bon Bon realized that as long as her real identity remained a secret, she could freely express her love for Lyra.
“You’re certain that you’ll always treasure each other,” Adam said, “Your relationship is built on mutual love. It’s no different with one’s faith. My belief in God is as certain as your love for Lyra.” When Adam had Bon Bon’s full attention, he bore his testimony.
“I love the Lord,” Adam said, “My soul delights in the words of His prophets. I take comfort in the sure knowledge that God’s will is constant. When the whole world is in turmoil, God won’t make weak concessions to public opinion. He’s a firm foundation on which to build.” Bon Bon realized that there was really nothing she could say. She doubted that Adam would ever change his views and she had no intention of changing who she was. All Bon Bon could do was to smile, nod and play pretend with Adam until she and Lyra could get off the ark.
The more time Bon Bon spent with Adam, the more they grew to enjoy one another’s company. For Bon Bon, it was a classic case of the prisoner feeling sympathetic towards her captor. Bon Bon wanted to remain in Adam’s good graces to increase her chance for survival. Adam was just happy to have another stallion to talk to. Bon Bon wanted Adam to trust her, so she made a habit of saying things to him that would elicit positive and agreeable responses.
“Steve, you’re a wonderful conversationalist,” Adam said, “You’re eager and teachable, which are qualities I admire in a young stallion.”
“Thank you,” Bon Bon said, “I’m blessed to have such a knowledgeable teacher.” Now that she had bonded with Adam, Bon Bon wanted to endear herself even further.
“I’d like to share a joke with you, if I may,” Bon Bon said, as she flashed a winning smile, “Why is it so cold in Hell after the flood?”
“I don’t know,” Adam said, “Why?”
“Since the Sodomites showed up, Satan is too scared to bend over and pick up any firewood!” Bon Bon said. Bon Bon’s delivery caused Adam to laugh uproariously. He placed a forehoof against a wooden beam to steady himself. He was laughing so hard that he was afraid he might fall over.
“You’re quite the comedian, young Steve,” Adam said, while wiping away mirthful tears, “Lyra is quite blessed to have a husband with such a healthy sense of humor.”
Meanwhile, Lyra was sitting alone in her pen, waiting for Bon Bon to return with Adam. She jumped up and ran to the door when she heard Adam call out for his wife. Eve trotted over to the door of her pen and waited for her husband.
“You’ll never guess what I found out today,” Adam said, cheerfully, “Apparently, a pair of lesbians escaped the flood and stowed away on the ark.” Lyra’s heart froze. She had horrifying visions of Adam torturing Bon Bon to get a confession. While Lyra was too petrified to move, Eve looked livid.
“Lesbians?!” Eve shouted, “Where?! I’ll get a mob together and we’ll cast the filly foolers into the sea!” As Adam and Bon Bon walked in front of the cages, Lyra saw her whole life pass before her eyes. There was nowhere to run. Lyra was preparing to fight for her life, when Adam burst out laughing. Bon Bon managed a half-hearted chuckle.
“Calm yourself, dearest,” Adam said, “It was merely a jest.” Lyra and Eve both looked dubious, but for vastly different reasons.
“A jest?” Eve said, looking around suspiciously, “But what about the lesbians?”
“It was simply a witty observation from young Steve here,” Adam said as he slapped Bon Bon on the back, “The cheeky rascal said that he and I could be compared to filly foolers, since all of us prefer the company of mares.” Lyra breathed a sigh of relief when she realized their secret was still secure. She then shot Bon Bon a look that seemed to say, “You scared me half to death with that little joke.” Bon Bon returned Lyra’s exasperated glare with a sheepish grin.
“Steve’s more than a first-rate comedian,” Adam said, “He’s also a hard worker and an excellent conversationalist.”
“You’re too kind,” Bon Bon said, “I just try to live my life with pious humility.” Adam looked in at Lyra, whose mouth was hanging open.
“Steve’s a terrific stallion,” Adam said to Lyra, “He’s kind and gentle. Tender and loving. Sensitive and compassionate. The perfect companion. You’d do well to live worthy of his love.” Bon Bon was embarrassed for all the praise Adam was giving her. She opened the door to her pen and sat down beside her marefriend. Lyra was too dumbfounded to speak. She looked at Bon Bon as though she were seeing her for the first time.
It was time to rest aboard the ark. The reflected light from the fire grew dim as the whole ark was cast into near darkness. Adam and Eve began saying their nightly prayers. When Lyra and Bon Bon were certain that their neighbors were sufficiently distracted, the two marefriends talked about their day.
“I met a nice Eweish sheep today named Eunice,” Lyra said, “She confided in me that she’s a lesbian.”
“A lesbian?” Bon Bon asked incredulously, “Are you sure?”
“I’m positive,” Lyra said, “It would seem we weren’t the only tribades to escape from Sodom.” Bon Bon looked rather worried.
“Lyra,” Bon Bon said, nervously, “You didn’t...”
“What? Tell her about us?” Lyra said, “Don’t worry. As far as she’s concerned, I’m just her heterosexual friend. I’d never do anything to compromise your disguise.” Once Adam and Eve finished their prayers, Lyra and Bon Bon halted their conversation. They waited until their neighbors were fast asleep before continuing. Lyra made sure that Adam was snoring before she spoke again.
“That reminds me,” Lyra asked, “When did you and Adam become such close friends?” Bon Bon glanced over at Adam. He had drifted off into a deep sleep and was exhausted from the events of the day.
“He acts differently when he’s not around his wife,” Bon Bon said, “In some respects, he’s nicer. I think Adam just feels more comfortable around stallions.”
“But you’re not a stallion!” Lyra said, a little too loudly. Bon Bon shushed her marefriend, as though worried that someone might hear.
“He doesn’t know that,” Bon Bon said, quietly, “Besides, I need to stay friends with Adam if we want to get through this. He has to be able to trust me.”
“Alright,” Lyra said, “I just worry about you alone with him.”
“Oh, Adam’s not so bad, once you get to know him,” Bon Bon said, “Aside from being an insufferable bigot, he can actually be sort of sweet.”
The ark was rocked by the waves as its inhabitants tried to rest. For some, a pleasant night’s sleep did not come easy. As Adam tossed and turned, his dreams seemed to taunt him. As he slept, he imagined that he and Steve were gay lovers. In his dream, Adam cradled Steve in his forehooves and nibbled on his ear. They reveled in their forbidden love while listening to their hearts beating as one.
“I love being around you, Steve,” Adam said in his dream, “I want to spend more time with you and show you how much our friendship means to me. I want to whisper in your ear that you’re my best friend and I... I love you, Steve.”
“Oh, Steve,” Adam muttered softly out loud, “Kiss me.” A leaking aqueduct above his pen awoke Adam from his dream. He blushed and began sweating from fear and embarrassment. With sheer panic in his eyes, Adam looked over at Bon Bon, who was sleeping peacefully beside Lyra. Adam couldn’t take his eyes off Bon Bon.
“Steve’s horn is so long and... suggestive,” Adam thought, “and his body is so petite and effeminate, for a stallion.” A knot formed in the pit of his stomach as Adam was struck with a sudden realization.
“Oh God, I’m lusting after Steve,” Adam thought, as a terrified look crossed his face, “I’m a coltcuddler.”