Chapter 5- Collapse of the heart
Your face is cold as you rest it on the hardwood table. You don’t know how long you have let your mind punish you, at your best guess it’s well over a few hours but you’re starting to not be able to take it. Every time you try to push your thoughts back to the far ends of your mind they spring back harder and faster than ever. You rub your head as you give out a loud moan.
Your mind I interrupted by the sound of hooves on the marble behind you. As the clop of the hooves gets closer your body gets tense to ashamed to see who it is.
“Hello sir, are you wanting dinner yet?”
You allow yourself to turn to the sound chief pony’s voice.
Your voice is cracky as you answer him; mainly due to the long amount of silence you have been enduring, “n-no I’m ok.”
He gives an unpleasant look at the plate in front of you before he turns to leave.
As the sound of his hooves disappears you aging bury your head to the coolness of the wood. You close your eyes and give a sigh as you try to calm your still through ridden mind. At first you think it’s working but the sound of hooves clapping the floor behind you stops your progress, your eyes open as you listen to the hooves getting closer.
You feel a warm object being pressed into the fur on your back, you tense up but do not try to stop her this time as you listen to her voice from behind you, “You can’t do this anymore.”
Your face is still to the wood as she continues to talk at you. “I know something is up with you…But I also know THAT was not the best way to handle it.”
You swallow hard as you turn to her, “Are you ok?”
“Am I okay?” Judging by her tone you know you’re in for a lecture, she floats her satchel off of her and to the table as she talks, “I don’t know what you think you are protecting me from but THAT, that is not what you should do it.”
You break your eyes from her as she continues, “I wanted my parents to like you…just like I like you.” Again you feel her warm hoof press against you. At this point her voice is now a scolding tone. ”I would not have acted that way to your parents.”
Her comment strikes a chord in you as she talks, “I’m really I-…”
You cut her off before she can finish her sentence, “Well guess what Twilight you will never have to do that will you!”
There is a moment of silence as both of you realize what you both just did. Your stomach which has still not unnoted tightens more as her ears fold back, “i…I didn’t mean it like that.”
You swallow the thought away as you talk in a calmer voice, “Twilight your dad is right…”
She looks at you with an anxious face.
“…I don’t know what I am.” You give a laugh as you finish your sentence.
Twilight looks at you in confusion, “what…what do you mean?”
You look down at your hooves as all of your suppressed thought and feelings start to shake you, “Well, what am I Twilight? Cause I’m not human! And I’m certainly not a pony!"
You look to her for the answer but she can’t look you in the eyes, “You’re… You’re whatever you want to be.”
You give a chuckle to her vague answer as you think, ya that’s going to help.
Her voice is lower as she speaks, “Is that what your nightmare was today?”
You’re quick to snap your head to her, the word brings two thoughts up to your mind, the first and most recent still eats at you as you stare at her.
You look back to your hooves, “I’m sorry for what happened at lunch.”
She gives a nod as she talks, “I understand human magic can cause you to do or say something that you normally wouldn’t do, and I forgive you. “ She grabs one of your hooves as she talks now, “Now let me help you this time.”
You look down at her hoof wrapped around your own; you know why you did what you did… “You don’t understand Twilight.”
She pushes your head up to her face as she talks in a sweet and low as she look at you, “I’m starting to.”
You look over her life filled purple eyes, the sparking in them make gives you a little smile, but at the same time you also hold back the urge to cry as you notice her eyes a slightly darker shade then you remember. You hold her hoof a little tighter as you talk in a low voice "that’s what I’m afraid of."
End of chapter 5