TEST 04: "HELLO EQUESTRIA"
I'll skip ahead past the boring parts, because there are a lot of them. Mostly just me and Daring taking day after day on an airship until at long last, we reached the Equestrian air space. I won't lie, being on an airship is freaking awesome, but even that excitement has its own finite lifespan.
Daring led me to the edge of the ship and pointed over the railing. "There's Baltimare down there. That's where I live."
I looked down at the bay town. It looked a lot like the town from Kiki's Delivery Service, but with ponies. "Looks nice. Bet it looks nicer up close." I gripped my portal gun. "Say, any chance I could jump ship without anypony noticing?"
"Are you that impatient to get off this bucket?" Daring asked with a grin.
"Truth be told? Yes. I am very ready to get off this bucket." I looked down again. "As long as I don't land on anypony, I should be safe from a fall this high. I did tell you these boots work at terminal velocity, right?"
"I think you did," Daring answered, "But I wouldn't recommend it. You're an immigrant, and I don't think they'd appreciate you jumping ship before going through customs."
"Hmm..." I looked down at my portal gun. "Well, I'm still sick of traveling, so I'm at least gonna make us a shortcut." Taking careful aim, I fired an orange beam down below us. The portal gun's orange indicator came on, telling me the orange portal had been successfully placed.
"What are you doing?" Daring asked.
"Saving us a train ride," I said, "I'll just open the blue portal once we land in Canterlot, and we'll be right back in Baltimare. The orange side won't open up until I set a new blue one anyway, since I reset it after we left Saddle Arabia."
"Smart plan," Daring said.
A few hours later, we finally landed in Canterlot. The city itself was beautiful, with it's all-white architecture, the vines growing over the aqueducts, the clean, sterile streets... it almost looked like it was built by Aperture. I wanted to leave as soon as possible.
Having finished with the customs check, and convincing the guard pony that my portal gun was not a weapon, we made our way out of the airport, and I found myself a nice, secluded spot where I could open the portal without drawing too much attention.
As soon as the blue ring opened up, a green earth mare fell out and landed on my face.
"HELP!" she screamed, "Where am I?"
"Excuse me?" I said, "Your butt is in my face."
Daring helped the mare off of me, and after managing to calm her down, I helped her get back through the portal. Somehow, I'd managed to shoot the beam through an open window into a bakery, and one of the customers thought the orange oval was some new glowing floor decoration.
"Sorry about the trouble, sir," I told the baker, and closed the portals.
"No problem," he said, "No harm, no foul. You did give us quite a scare, though. Imagine seeing a hole in the floor that led to Canterlot instead of my cellar!"
I chuckled nervously. "Yeah, I'll bet that was weird. I'll try not to do it again."
Looking back on my strange, somewhat perverted ordeal, I realized something that I wasn't sure if I should be bothered or relieved by: the ponies weren't bothered by me. Here I was, an alien in their world, and most of them didn't even bat an eyelash at me. Sure, a few stared here and there for a moment, but only those stares that say "hey, you don't see that every day." Nopony even bothered to ask what I was.
I guess one could say they didn't want to be rude by asking me what my species was, or they didn't want to appear ignorant. I could respect that, but sheesh, wasn't anypony able to tell I didn't belong?
After making sure nopony was going to press charges, Daring led me through the city to her home. I found the smaller buildings and modern style to be more appealing than Canterlot, granted I was in a bit of a hurry to get that city out of the way, and didn't give it much time to grow on me. Still, the sooner I got done traveling, the better; I was pooped.
The place Daring led me to, however, was nothing like what I'd expected. Her home was a very impressive manor on the south side of town that looked well cared-for. Being in a somewhat urban area, the grounds weren't as big as you'd expect, but still bigger than average. The house itself easily had more rooms than one pony would ever need.
"Welcome to Do Manor," Daring said as she flew over the gate, "I'll have my butler, Alfredo, set you up in a room of your own."
I portalled through the fence and joined her on the other side, grinning at how neither of us bothered to open the gate. "Thanks. I'll try not to stay too long. Soon as I can afford my own place, I'll be out of your mane."
Daring turned on me and held up a hoof. "Nuh-uh, not while I'm in charge. You saved my life, so you stay as long as you want. Nopony's forcing you out. And second," she put her hoof down and smirked, "you still owe me a treasure, so you can't leave until you get me something rare. Until then, you'll just be my assistant."
I folded my arms and scowled. "Humph. Way to treat your rescuer."
"Even heroes gotta pay their debts," Daring retorted.
We stared each other down for a few seconds before both of us burst out laughing. I have no idea what was so funny about the moment, but it seemed like something just came over us both that made the situation hilarious.
I closed my portals to make sure nopony passing by fell through the side walk into Daring's yard, or, God forbid, got stuck falling up and down in place. But my inner portal nerd told me the latter was very unlikely if the pony was already in motion. Still, better safe than sorry.
Daring rang the bell, and the door was opened by a tall (by pony standards) unicorn stallion with an eggshell coat, quaffed chestnut mane, and dark green eyes. He was dressed in traditional butler attire, and had a cutie mark that looked like a gold bell with a wooden handle.
I wondered if the males also called them cutie marks. The name seemed too feminine to me, but I couldn't come up with an alternative that didn't sound gay.
"Welcome home, Miss Do," he said in a voice that sounded like the new Alfred Pennyworth, "I trust your trip was productive."
"It went well enough, Alfredo," Daring replied.
It dawned on me.
"I expected you home several hours from now, I'll admit," Alfredo said, "I just saw the airship fly over us half an hour ago."
I fought to keep a straight face.
Alfredo noticed me. "Oh, I'm sorry, how rude of me. Who is your friend here?"
I probably looked like I was sucking on a lemon right then.
"Oh, this is Ash Pod," Daring said, turning to me, "He's gonna be staying with... Ash? Are you OK?"
I bit my lip and nodded. "Mhmm."
"Seriously, are you al--"
"One sec," I said, holding up a finger. I turned around, put my shirt over my mouth, and laughed as hard as I could into my hand. I had found the pony version of Batman's butler, and he was named after a pasta sauce.
Gasping for air, I turned around and put on my best straight face. Then I turned around again and laughed into my shirt once more.
"Is he alright?" Alfredo asked.
"He's probably been in the sun too long," Daring said, "That and, you're not gonna believe this, but he's not from around here... like, from this world."
"Really," Alfredo said in surprise.
I managed to calm down and recompose myself. "Ah, sorry about that. I, uh, just realized this town reminds me of a place I used to live in when I was little."
"Aha," Daring said, raising an eyebrow.
"Anyway," Alfredo cut in, "I'll have dinner ready around six. You say Master Ash will be staying with us? I'll prepare a room for him right away."
"Thanks, Alf," Daring said back, then turned to me, "Come on, Ash. I'll show you around. You're gonna love the gym."
I'll tell you why Daring's house was so big: the gym took up half the house. No, I am not exaggerating that. The gymnasium she had made the one my high school had look tiny. The best part? Plenty of portal-compatible surfaces.
I stood agape just beyond the threshold, staring at the place.
"Pretty impressive, huh?" Daring said, "This is where I do my training in between quests. It's gotta be big for a pegasus so I can practice flying in here, too."
I blinked and shook my head. "Flying? Wouldn't you practice that outside?"
She chuckled. "Get a load of this." Trotting over to a wall, she opened a panel and flipped a switch inside.
All at once, the room was filled with a powerful gust of wind that didn't let up.
"I got the super fans installed so I can practice flying in harsh weather!" she shouted over the roaring fans.
"That's awesome!" I shouted back, "Can it do rain?"
"Rain, snow, even lightning!" she called, then turned off the fan, "Alfredo hates when I run those, though, so I mostly just use wind. I imagine you'll wanna play with your portal gun in here a lot, huh?"
I grinned. "Dare, portalling is only part of what I'm gonna do in here."
Alfredo came in and cleared his throat. "Master Ash, your room is ready. If you'll just follow me, we can get you settled in."
"Thank you," I said, "Be right back, Dare."
"OK, I'll be here when you get back."
I followed Alfredo down the hall and up the stairs. "Hey, Alfredo?"
"Yes, Master Ash?" he responded.
"Could you maybe just call me Ash?" I asked, "No offense, I'm just not used to the whole master thing."
"Of course, sir," the unicorn said with a nod, "It's simply protocol to begin formal when introduced to somepony new. Of course, if I am to address you as Ash, then I request you also address me as Alf, as Miss Do does."
"Deal," I said and held out a hand.
He put his hoof in my hand and shook it.
We came to my room on the second floor.
"Here you are, Ash," Alfredo said, opening the door with his sea foam green magic, "Your room. Please make yourself at home, and let me know if you'd like anything rearranged. I assure you, it's no imposition."
"Thanks, Alf," I said, stepping inside. I paused and turned back to him. "Say, Alf? I'm sorry if this is too personal, but where are Daring's family?"
Alfredo looked sullen. "I'm afraid my former employers, Daring's mother and father, passed away some time ago. It was a tragic accident. They were hosting a reception at the marina for visiting nobility, and a ship coming in to dock had lost control. The sailor had fallen asleep at the helm, and crashed his ship into the pier where the party was taking place." His face fell even more. "Daring's mother got her hoof caught between a pair of planks. Her husband tried to pull her out, but neither of them got out in time."
I felt sorry for Daring, and even worse for laughing at her similarity to Bruce Wayne. I didn't know what to say.
"She keeps up a brave face, you know," Alfredo continued, "Going out on her expeditions, doing dangerous things. I think it's her way of coping, so I've never opposed her." He took a breath. "I'll admit, she worries me to no end when she goes off adventuring, but it's who she is, and you can't change a pony when they don't suit you. Not that she hasn't tried a normal life herself; it just didn't work out for her."
"I'm sorry," I said, "I didn't mean to bring up bad memories."
"Not at all," said Alfredo, "They're good memories. Best years of my life, working for the Dos, helping them raise their little filly into a fine young mare. I'm sure her parents would be proud of all that she's accomplished, too."
I nodded. "Yeah, they would, wouldn't they?"
"Indeed, they would. Well, if that's all you require, I've duties to attend to. Just ring the bell if you need me."
"Thanks," I said, "Though, I might just take a nap. Lot of traveling lately. Thanks for everything."
"It was my pleasure," Alfredo said, and then left.
I closed the door, pulled my boots off, and then flopped onto the bed. It finally sunk in that I, too, would never see my parents again, nor anyone else I knew from my own world. Unable to take my mind off it, I gave in, and cried into my pillow.