Chapter 4: Testing will being shortly in 3....
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Today was Saturday, the 3rd of the second month of the second year after the third Millennium of peace. Or what in human terms would be called February 16th, 1003. GLaDOS woke up when her Relaxation pod's clock hit 9:30, lightly tapping the dented open button which nearly broke a while back. She sat up on the right side of the best, arching her back in a most humanoid fashion. A mirror lay across from her, a perfect picture of her current state. She was a white-coated filly, with a light, solid brown mane and tail. Her eyes, no longer as cruel looking as before, shone a bright yellow. This mirror reminded her that things aren't what they used to be, and that things can change for the best. Sure, knowing that a psychotic mute and an all-powerful moron are running amiss in Aperture Science unsupervised with potentially danger technology would cause most to stress out but GLaDOS had over come that hurtle mere days after arriving here. Today, she'd be normal. Today is the day she would hang out with her new 'friends' and take an exam that should take no more then thirty minutes. Today is the day GLaDOS would be Star Gazer, a perfectly normal unicorn with explainable knowledge about a species that doesn't exists nor the technology they once wielded. Star was 74.3 percent sure that something could go wrong but won't. The other 25.7 percent being that something will go wrong horribly no matter what and there's little for her to do about it.
"Time to do the thing I dread most.... Grooming."
Grooming was a very strange an alien thing to the former Disc Operating System, the closest thing she could call experience was cleaning up the human remains after they got incinerated in the furnace or melted in a pool of acid. Neither left much to clean up but a few bones. The white filly begrudgingly levitated the relatively unused hairbrush to her bedside, wincing as her roots were tugged on. The process took a good five minutes to completely straiten GLaDOS's brown hair and another two to make sure it was all on one side, hating when she discovered that a few locks had emigrated to the other side of her face. When she was finished, a well-kept filly with bright yellow eyes glared back at her in the mirror. Star tried on a smile, but her facial muscles refused to keep the expression.
"Meet Star Gazer, the most intellectual and boring filly in all of Equestria. Well, the odds of me being the most boring are pretty slim due to the amount of completely useless- Oh listen to myself! I sound like a robot, spewing out facts and odds of something no-one, I mean nopony, cares about.. Lyra is right, I need to get out more often or I'll end up like Twilight the Bookworm: Forever alone and forever locked up inside my home with a pet of the opposite gender. That reminds me, I need to see how the flightless pegasus's pets are reacting to those home-brewed chems I placed in their food. If even one managed to take care of itself it be a miracle...."
After pondering the various possibilities of a muscular rabbit or carnivorous beaver, Star Gazer began to pack her needed supplies for the day. A note book, A Infinity-Well pen (created with the use of tiny portals and a link to the Press's Ink storage containers), A book on the most dangerous creatures in Equestria, One bag of hay and last but not least: a Saddlebag. GLaDOS gave herself a once-over.
At first glance, she looked like a rather smart-looking filly with a bag filled with no doubt tools of education. But delve a bit deeper and you'd find eyes filled with pain, misery, suffering, death, and surprisingly happiness along side a brain filled with so much information about a certain species may would swear that they existed at some point in time. Which they did, but in a different reality where ponies never talked and everything operated naturally.
"Glady, they're going to be here soon! Come and eat breakfast!" Lyra shouted from downstairs, which amazed her since it managed to penetrate the mechanical door that guarded the entrance to her room.
"Coming Mom!" She responded, pressing the intercom button next to her bed.
Star Gazer rotated leading to the hallway, smiling as she thought about someone managing to get into her room but unable to pull it. Awaiting her below was a second-class meal, a plate filled with peas, carrots, an apple, and a glass of orange juice. It was surprising how they managed to survive solely to fruits and vegetables, as the human test subjects always whined about the vegetarian paste they always received. Well, if they managed to survive the near-fatal tests that is. After consuming a healthy meal, Lyra dropped a wooden box lock on the table.
"What is that?"
"I dunno, it was sent by.... I can't make out the hoofwriting. Anyways there's a panel on the top. It reads: 'OPEN IN 5 DAYS, 9 HOURS, 38 MINUTES, AND 43 SECONDS' How queer is that? It's counting down! Who do you think se-"
At that moment the door bell rang, followed by the familiar "!" meaning that someone who was entered into the house's database was present.
"I'm coming, hold your.... Just hold on."
Star opened up the door, revealing three familiar faces.
"Hey Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Applebloom."
"Hey GLaDOS, ready to take the exams? They're not that hard, just something to see how far you've come last time. Longest anyone took was three hours, but that's after he started eating crayons and glue, so you should ace this thing right?"
"Yeah, but I dunno.... Testing here is a lot different then the kind I'm used to. Will Mrs. Cheerilee be instructing us?"
"Oh, no. She's out sick today I think." Chimed in the orange pegasus.
'You never know, Mrs. C hasn't missed a day of teaching since she was hired by the school."
"Wow,That takes some dedication."
'Or maybe she's being forced against her will..' Star thought, but rather said: "I guess she's right, in a sense. Anyways, got my notes, snacks, and just about everything else I need. How about you girls?"
"We're all set, though I don't think you'll need all that stuff in your bag.
"Better to come prepared then empty-handed..."
----
As they four fillies walked to school, they took their minds off the test by talking about all the dangers the "Mane Six" had faced and defeat them with.... friendship. *Barf* These included a species that fed on love, a gas-based creature which (with enough power) could solidify into a physical form and prevent ponies from using magic, a chimera called a draconequus who apparently had the ability to alter reality and physics, and a corrupted alicorn who wished to bring about an unending night. All of these strange beings would have been stunned, dissected, and then studied in the name of science had they made an appearance on Earth. Which reminded her that they most likely was an Earth where one or more of these creatures had found their way there. To bad they wouldn't last long enough against guns, but that is only if the humans are still alive and not enslaved by the combine; which would probably shoot them anyways.
By the time they had reached the school, the bell had rung and everypony was heading to class.
"Looks like we made it in time. Some colt last year was late and sat outside the entire day."
"Why couldn't he go home?"
"Dunno, just sorta sat there whining about somethin'."
"I'd be pretty upset too If i missed out on something as big as the exam. I mean, doesn't this determine what your job will be? And where it will be?"
"Pretty much, though they don't tell us how it works. Big government secret or somethin'."
"Hmmm, a government that hides secrets from its people? Ha, seems like their all the same in every universe."
"What was that last bit? I didn't catch it."
GLaDOS looked away from her friends and saw a dark purple-pink mare looking at them with a quizzical look. It was Mrs. Cheerilee, healthy as ever and looking ready to teach, thought the appearance of bags under her eyes told that she hadn't been getting much sleep lately.
Scootaloo was about to repeat what Star had just said when she was interrupted. "You know what, never mind. Get to class now, testing will start shortly. Don't want to miss the exam!"
The four fillies went to their respective seats, waiting patiently for the exams to be passed out. Each exam had basic knowledge portion for everyone to complete, then an advanced section for each sub-species. Unicorn's usually had that hardest and most complicated due to them having to learn the properties of magic and how it works. Pegasai the second hardest, but many argue that learning when to place a cloud for rain or to create a necessary storm was much more difficult. As for Earth ponies, they mainly cared for the land and just about every other job that didn't require a pegasus or unicorn to be present. Regardless, Star Gazer knew that despite her new organic body her mind was literally hard-wired to complete every test presented with flawless accuracy.This would no doubt draw attention to herself, but it might work to her advantage. As the exams were passed out and explained, the metaphorical cogs inside Star Gazer's head began to churn.
As the last sections were explained to the class, Miss Cheerilee began counting down as GLaDOS did.
"Testing will begin shortly in three...."
"Two....."
"One."
By the time the clock hit 9:30, Star Gazer placed down her Infinity-Well Pen and breathed a deep sigh of relief. The Advanced section for experience Casters was more difficult then she had expect, involving questions dealing with time travel, dimensional gateways, First encounter scenarios, and a hoof-full of other "What ifs" including a world without magic. Of course, the last one was a breeze and nearly filled the page with how technology took its place. Most of it would sound like blasphemy, with the weather and animals taking of themselves along with mechanical creations being able to fly into outer space and dig deep below the surface. But that is the world GLaDOS had come to known and cherish, albeit it was a rather lame world now that Black Mesa caused a Resonance Cascade and doomed that Earth to be forever ruled by the Combine. Unless a mute with near super-human abilities comes crashing in via wall to yank away control from their grasp, but the chances of that were slim even with some generous rounding.
"Star, are you okay? It's taken you an awfully long time to complete the Exam." Her teacher looked worried, obviously used to the fact that most ponies only take thirty minutes to complete the required portions of the packet.
"I'm fine, Mrs. Cheerilee. Also, do you know what would happen if a Resonance Cascade were to occur and cause an alien race to invade Equestria? Yeah your right, chances of that in happening this year are low but in future years its very much probable."
The purple-pink Earth pony simply picked up her Exam and trotted over to her desk, completely ignoring her question. Such questions were rare in her class and had no real way to answer them, and it was best to give an answer you know is right on a topic you're familiar with then a foreign one. Mrs. Cheerilee rang the bell on her desk, signaling for everyone to calm down.
"Alright everypony, by this time everyone has finished.You now have the option of going home or staying here to play on the playground. Have a good day!"
The bell rang and class was dismissed, nearly half the class swarming onto the play area and immediately resumed talking outside. However, four fillies remained as they gather their stuff and calmly made their way out the door opposite of the playground.
"Do ya think ya did good on the Exam Glady?"
"Good? I aced it completely, thought I did not foresee any magical user to be able to use time-travel."
"Must've added that one after Twilight's episode where she went back in time to warm herself not to go the Starswirl the Bearded wing of the Royal Palace, but ended up going because she never finished explaining why not to. It's a bit confusing if you think about."
"Wow, you really are a encyclopedia aren't you?" Star Gazer rolled her eyes, the white unicorn spewing out random facts like it was going out of style.
"Not my fault that I remember everything I see." Sweetie Belle shot back.
"So you have a photographic memory? Fascinating, I hadn't thought of ponies of having that ability."
"Hey, can we stop talking about some lame thing that happened forever ago? I heard that Vinyl came out with some sick new beats a few days ago, maybe we could check them out?"
"Sounds like a plan."
'You have no idea...' GLaDOS thought to herself as they began the short journey to the local music store.
---
"Woah, what did you do to them Glady? They look.... stunned!" Scootaloo prodded Scratch, who was frozen in place with her mouth wide open along with Octavia.
"Nothing much, just introduced them to a new genre of music. I guess you could say that I.... blew their minds,"
"So what else where you doing in here? Looks like you built some musical devices of your own while we stood outside for a good ten minutes or so." Applebloom was staring at a black block roughly the size of Big Mac, four silver speakesr donning the front with dozens of rouge wires, parts, and tubes ran from the front to all over it.
"Let me answer that question with a question: Have you noticed that the temperature has been rising recently? I have, and I was surprised to say that a meteor is heading our way. It shall strike Vinyl's shop in ,oh say, the next 7 minutes? I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me, but I can assure you that if I don't do something about it we'll all choke to death on ash or get crush by crumbling buildings weakened by the massive shock-wave its going to generate on impact. And there's no point in running, unless you can magically teleport us all to Canterlot but I highly doubt that. And so this," GLaDOS said, pointing to the massive machine. "Is our only hope of survival. Now, before you go asking how it works I think a demonstration is in order."
With a bit of help from Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, they managed to push the contraption outside and into the road. GLaDOS levitated them back as she worked her actual magic, Parts and wires flying all over the place as the block slowly transformed into a cannon-like creation. What had once been a mess of technology had become a sleek, dangerous looking machine.
"Girls, go inside."
"Why?"
"Unless you want your brain to come flowing out of your ear holes and have a death wish, be my guest and stay outside."
GLaDOS smiled as she heard the patter of three pair of hooves striking the ground, an odd noise signaling that they had entered the building. She primed the device, now dubbed the Aperture Science Sonic Destabiliser Cannon, and adjusted its angle to roughly 78 degrees. The Meteor was a few miles up in the atmosphere, but was quickly making its way down and the ASSDC only had enough power for one shot. The two dangerous forces of nature waited for the other, thirty seconds going by and then two entire minutes. Finally, the Meteor showed itself.
It was a flaming ball of molten rock, super-heated by its entry into the atmosphere. Smaller chunks followed it like children, but none brighter then the father nor as dangerous. If her calculations were correct, which they most certainly were, the shock wave caused by the two forces colliding will either disintegrate the smaller pieces completely or hurl them a safe distance away from any living creature excluding those in the forest. Not that she cared in any way, shape, or form for the well-being of those residing in Ponyvillie; She didn't want to die that's all.
'Talking to yourself while in danger of being kill? That's a bad idea. Focus on the issue at hand: A giant rock on fire is flying right at you and you're going to fight with yourself? Just fire the damn thing!'
And so she did.
The combined power of Vinyl Scratch's bass and speakers were far beyond anything Star Gazer had ever encountered, packing so much punch that it pierced right through the heart of the meteor. As the center was disintegrated, the rest followed as the rest of the beam caught up with it. A column of pure sound obliterated the remains, leaving a cloud of fine red dust in its wake as it continued its journey into the upper atmosphere. The soundwaves generated by the cannon cracked the sound-proof glass, almost made GLaDOS deaf dispute her robotic origins, and caused an nearby EqD building to explode from the extreme force. It was standing right next to a jet engine, and expecting not to be burned out blown away with such force your skin would come off.
The AI was wide-eyed with surprise, her brown mane now had yellow streaks in it along with being styled in a most crazed manner. Star shook herself, her hair now returning to its previous state aside from the streaks and went to investigate the cannon. The panels had retracted, once again hiding the complex machinery inside within the confines of steel as the sound finally faded. She was about to tell her friends that it was safe to come outside when GLaDOS was confronted by the same two ponies she had stunned earlier.
"Did you really just save the day by blasting a meteor with a giant amp?" The disk-jockey, who probably did not know what her title meant, asked in a hyped tone.
"Sonic Destabilizer Cannon, not a amp." The yellow-eyed unicorn corrected her.
"Whatever, the point is: HOW THE HAY DID YOU DO THAT?"
"Well the beam was created by an effect known as Gedeon Streaming, which occurs when sound reaches a high enough level and ends up creating a jet of air in addition to the normal back-and-forth motion of sound. It appeared that the jet of air here was so violent that it caused the air itself to form a super heated plasma. It also have occur by Sonoluminescence, where local-scale vibrations compress air enough to set it on FIRE, or in this case plasma though that tends to happen with high-frequency noises."
"So you're telling me that if I were to crank my bass loud enough, it could do THAT?"
"Oh no, it takes a massive amount of energy, which then creates the sound, in order to do so. It takes roughly ten hours for it to recharge due to the energy-absorption effect of a spell I discovered a few days back. And before you ask how I discovered it, you don't want to know. Now what was the words that ponies use when their grateful for a certain action... Hmmm.... What is it? It's on the tip of my tongue....."
"Thank you?" They two musicians said in unison. They blushed a bit, but then a look realization overcame then as they noticed what had just happened.
GLaDOS stifled a laugh and settled for a smile. "Your welcome." Then the white filly began to depart, but hesitated when Vinyl called her name out.
"Hey Star, I know this might seem sudden as we just met and all but do you wanna become my apprentice? I mean besides the fact that you just saved the town from a fiery fate and you're a wiz with tech, I think you have some potential in ya to become the next big thing in the music business."
A little alarm went off inside the AI's head, reprocessing the previous statement. "You want me, to be your apprentice?" Confirmation needed.
"Yep, so what do you say?" DJ PON3 held out her hoof, a mischievous smile on her face.
"I accept, but under the terms that if we are to publish any music I get at least 7% of the profit and that I manage the contracts." Confirmed
"Eh, needed a new manager anyways so deal!"
And they took shook hooves, sealing the fate of Equestria forever.