'I'm a monster... I really am.' I came to the realisation slowly but surely, through the little hints my new body gave me, the skills it had and muscle memory the limbs possessed.
Thinking back I found my vision lingering on my captor's vulnerable spots, every time I thought of the kind mare there was a flicker of instinct that told me to leap, fangs bared, for her throat. Lies and deception came easily, a game of thinking up false identities soon burdened me with complex back-stories, plans for how to make the falsehood pass inspection, how to bluff and deceive my way past guarded doors.
A gentle sound broke me from my reverie and thoughts. A tick-tock rhythm of hoof on wood, the light airiness signifying no-one other than the kind mare. I hazarded lowering a holey hoof to the floor, a smile almost cracking my lips when I 'saw' the ghostly tremor-sense images of her movement.
She paused outside my door, her breathing heavy with anxiety and/or nerves, I closed my eyes and reached out gently to sense her emotions, to find that yes, anxiety was there, with a very deep tremor of fear; fear of what I couldn't tell, but more important too me was the joyful warmth of her surface happiness, the feeling bubbling up into a small whistled melody.
Then her whistling was muffled as she took up a weird pose on her hind hooves, both wings curled forward and one hoof on the wall for balance. It took a minute of clicking before I realised...
'Picking the lock? You naughty girl you.' I lowered my head to the pillow as her mood turned to triumph, feigning sleep as my sensitive ears piked up the *thunk* of a bolt sliding back.
I didn't need my tremor sense to hear the door being creaked open, a shaft of light from the hallway suddenly illuminating the wall, 'was it that dark?' I thought, watching her shadow grow in the light-beam, breaths light but eager, the glow of excitement warming me and sweet smell invigorating my form.
I felt her hoof poking me, heard her light voice and sensed the vibrations “Do you have a name?” She rubbed a wing up my side, giving off more and more of that delicious stuff, the energizing substance that made my weird little heart sing. I still couldn't put a hoof on what it was, but I liked her all the more for giving it.
“I used to.” I could almost see her cute little face screwing up in confusion as she tried to decipher my clicking voice. Then there was that tremor of fear when I turned, raising my head high with eyes focused down and fangs carefully tucked away. I did the best apologetic face my strange leathery skin/plates would allow.
The mare visibly fought down her fear (it was visible to my new emphatic sense at least) and gave me a hug, a warm embrace that meant the world to me at that moment, her rich scent filling my nostrils -she smelled of earth, sky and sweat, like hard work and sunshine- “don't worry” she reassured me “I don't need a name right now. My name's Silver Lining, the grumpy guy from earlier is my dad,Golden Oats.”
I smiled, again careful not to show off my fangs, and shifted on the bed, allowing her room to climb up and sit. Silver did so with aplomb, slinking onto the bed and nuzzling in close to my hulking form.
I must have given some sign of personal space impeachment, because in the next moment my caring captor shrank away with embarrassment oozing off her in waves “sorry... I've always liked bugs and arachnids, and you're like a giant pony-bug-thing...”she made to step off the bed, her foot almost touching the ground before I stopped her.
My holey hoof gripped her shoulder like glue (I guess that means I could climb walls?), pulling her back into a silent embrace, her every heartbeat lighting up my tremor-sense. I put on my best smile and gently dropped a diaphanous wing over her barrel “I've been called much worse” I clicked, my buzzing alien mouth making her vibrate.
If Silver understood or not I couldn't tell, because in the next few moments she was simply getting comfortable, her mood and 'aura' ecstatic at my acceptance. “Oh thank-you-thank-you-thank-you” she babbled, finally curling herself into a comfortable spot against my abdomen.
There we lay a while, a cutesy pony and the beast. Her mind blankly content to relax against my chitinous plates, mine roving over my own feelings, the emotions and cues that she gave off, and a dozen other things, not least of which what would happen when her father returned.
…It was nice...
In time she broke the silence, both buggy brooding and marely contentment, to look up and ask “So... what can you do?”
The merest glance of my big blue eyes gave my answer 'Do?'
Oh god, no pony, creature or entity otherwise known should be able to twiddle their hooves so cutely “I mean, do you have any special abilities?” She tapped my horn with a wing, earning a warning hiss, before looking back at me “is that big ol' horn good for any magic, or is it just for show?”
'Good question Silver, a very good question indeed' I thought, gazing up at the spiked blade jutting from my head.
The teeny pegasus squeaked in surprise when I heaved upwards suddenly, shunting her off the bed as I stood up.
Silver reprimanded me as she hung of the bed in a very immodest position “A little warning next time!”
I ignored her though, just as I ignored her scramble too right herself, just as I ignored my cutest captor's attempts to make eye-contact, to get my attention. My gaze was focused inwards then, looking deep to my core as I tried to find my magic.
It was hard to find at first, but the memories of my body's former owner came in flashes of remembrance to guide me. My magic seemed in my minds eye to be a flickering green inferno, hiding in the pit of my chest and behind my eyes, the emerald conflagration gave off a warm feeling, as if it were an innate and familiar part of me, rather than something I hadn't had before.
I manipulated my inner fire with thoughts, shaping it with instinctive and half-remembered skill, my attempts to guide the magic clumsy at best.
'Time for magic then' I thought opening my eyes and looking to Silver, who had sat down too my side and was patiently waiting, I hazarded giving her a wink before focusing on the task at hand. 'Okay magic... Show-time!' With a trill of effort I concentrated on the pillow in-front of me and willed my magic into being.
*POOMPF*
'I hope Silver has more pillows' were my immediate thoughts, as smouldering feathers rained down around me, the wispy smoke rising up to meet a and greet with the smoke from the pillowcase, or rather the scraps of pillowcase left behind after the rest detonated.
It had been quite spectacular, and more than a bit funny really, a shimmering green aura had enveloped my horn, resting for a moment there before acting, unleashing a brilliant bolt of coruscating flame to devour the pillow. Then it had exploded.
The hilarious timing of my magic had no effect on Silvers mix of shock, fear, excitement and (after moment of disbelief) anger. But her bubbling rage found no outlet in her voice, my embarrassment and apologetic eyes soothed her too quickly, instead she snorted and rested on her haunches again, as if waiting for me to fix my mistake, to do anything more.
'Okay, no more destructo-bolts please' I begged my horn, looking deep within myself to the flickering green flames, which had dimmed slightly since last I checked but moments ago.
With thoughts and feelings I poked and prodded the amorphous mass of magic, trying to shape it. Too my surprise it changed as I worked, a form taking shape inside the flames. It looked like a pony, it's features ill-defined. A memory of instinct and vague fuzz enticed me to impose sharper contrast, the pony-doll in the inferno taking the shape and colour of my favourite pony, the kind Fluttershy.
With a whoosh of flame I released my creation into the world.
Stunned, flabbergasted, confused, befuddled; these emotions and expressions all danced across Silver's face as I opened my senses again, seeing her eyes locked on me.
I turned to ask what was the matter after moment, stopping as I realised the world was … off slightly, it seemed larger than before, and the reflection in my captor's eyes was not one of a black behemoth, but rather of butter yellow and mellow pink. I looked to my holey hoof, only to find it whole and hairy, coated in short fuzz and ended in a rather mundane hoof, my wings were covered in feathers, my horn had gone.
I had turned into Fluttershy.
“I'm Fluttershy!” I giddily crowed, standing on my hind hoofs and twirling to get a better look at myself.
Silver interrupted to ask, shock rendering her mind and face blank “Who's Fluttershy?”
I replied without hesitation, The element of kindness's voice replicated perfectly “a pony from Ponyville, she's my favourite” I paused for thought before amending “after you of course.”
Silver blushed and looked away, her bashfulness blazing “you flatterer you...”
It was at this point both our brains caught up.
I was first off the mark, my hoofs flying up so fast I nearly knocked myself out “I can talk!”
Silver followed a close second. “You can talk!”
Another revelation hit at the speed of thought, both of us growing more excited “I can change shape!?”
“You can do magic!!”
“I can talk!!!”
“You've been to Ponyville?” Silver asked, her giddy excitement fading like water on desert sand.
My own happiness burned down, fell over and sank into the swamp. “Uh... yea-well no... not exactly no.” I laid down, resting my new pony head on my forelegs “I've observed Ponyville, but I've never been there.” I put on a little smile “it's so nice, and happy.” My smile faded as memories began flashing up, of parched deserts and screaming winds, of choking thirst and endless hunger.
Silver saw my sadness written on the adorable face of my new form, her mood shifted quickly to sympathy. Resting a wing on my fuzzy back she slipped up onto the mattress “the place you're from, it's not happy and nice?”
I winced as the memories grew less vague, more clear “No... I don't think it was that nice, or very happy.”
Again sympathy flooded from her, backed by a wave of that sweet sustaining stuff I loved so much “you think?”
“The memories are vague, fuzzy. It's not easy to recall who I was, what I am...” I concentrated hard for a moment “I can't even remember my own name. If I had one.”
My pegasus friend shook my/Fluttershy's shoulder with her wing “Aw come on, every-pony has a name. Tell me what you remember, maybe we can piece it together.”
I smiled again 'only for you silver' I thought “Alright” I said. With a big intake of breath I raised my head and began to talk in fits and starts.
“I-I was a noble of sorts, I think... I had my own swarm, a territory. I remember meetings, being bowed to, bowing to others” the images came in a trickle, broken by fuzz and static.
“I lived out in the desert? I remember sand, so much sand and wind. I sent out my swarm for food, water, sometimes they'd bring stuff back, sometimes not. I was hungry most of the time, but it was important to feed the swarm, otherwise we'd all starve.” I shuddered in my borrowed fur as memories of the lean times rolled past.
“There were other nobles I'd visit, all with their own swarm, their own territory, mostly prosperous ones.”
Silver asked “why would you visit? Diplomacy?” her ears were perked, her attention on me.
The next few memories made me blush “diplomacy of a sort... I can remember visiting other nobles, but they're all female. I'd only visit if they wanted a new noble, to start a new hive.”
Silver thought that over “a new noble?” then her noose wrinkled “oh” disgust impinged on her interest. “Oh...ewww.”
I chuckled nervously, clearing my throat “aheheh... *ahem*, moving on.” I waited until Silver had ceased to make strange faces before continuing. “As I was saying, I used to visit other hives, to make new nobles. But one visit went a bit weird, because there were other nobles there. A lot of them, both male and female”
My mind distanced itself as the memories rushed past “the noble I was visiting wanted too start a new hive, but she was also gathering support for a plan, a big plan that needed more than one swarm to succeed.” I wrinkled my nose “I can't remember the plan, but me and the other nobles all hated it, it was a stupid plan, dangerous even.”
My mind panicked with the ghosts of emotion, my nerves flaring in phantom pain “We tried to fight her, the scheme she was plotting was too dangerous, we couldn't let her go through with it. We all banded together, but she was too strong. The noble collapsed the cavern on us, she destroyed half her own hive to kill all of us.”
Silver was hugging her knees on the floor, listening so hard she barely dared to breath, let alone squeak “why aren't you dead then?”
I thought hard on that, forcing the memory to the surface “I was dead, almost anyway. I was trapped under the rock, getting squashed slowly by the weight of all that stone. But then a voice spoke in my head.” I shuddered visibly “it was discord. He saved me, and then... well you know the rest.”
Silver quirked an eyebrow “why did Discord save you?”
I thought carefully then. To tell her the truth, or hide behind this façade a while longer “... I don't know... because he's Discord I guess. He doesn't need a reason.”
Ms Lining seemed almost disappointed by that answer “okay...” she trailed away.
A haze of awkward silence descended, my mind trapped in the past, my cute captor thinking of things unknown.
It was broken by Silver of course, whistling and rolling to her hooves “So. Shapeshifting huh?”
“Yep” how else would I answer?
“Can you mimic anypony, or anything? Is there any other magic you can do?”
That was a really good question. “That's a good question.”
Sticking my tongue out a little, I concentrated.
The next few hours cost Silver Lining several more pillows, and one ceiling.