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// TEST 01: "THE DAMSEL INDISPOSED" 
// Story: An Experiment 
// by Kelvin Shadewing 
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TEST 01: "THE DAMSEL INDISPOSED"




How should I describe what I saw? High up on the wall was some sort of orange quadruped with a dark gray tail and a... safari hat? Oh, and wings. It had wings. One of them was held at an awkward angle, like it was hurt. This thing was definitely a pegasus.

The creature that was standing over said pegasus and laughing like a Bond villain, however, I'm not sure how to describe. Some kind of blue cat monkey with a hand on its tail. Its tail hand was holding some kind of gold scimitar with a jeweled hilt that was pointed at the pegasus.

The pegasus backed up towards the edge. Her rear hoof slid off the edge and she looked down at the distant earth below.

I knew what I had to do, but doing so would mean losing my portal back home. But if I didn't do anything, I'd have to live with the death of a stranger on my conscience. I couldn't stand by a second longer, so I acted.

I fired the orange portal onto the side of a tall wall, and a blue at my feet, falling through into the air. I took aim at the pegasus and fired my next blue portal under her hooves. She fell unceremoniously through over me and started her plummet right towards me.

"This could be painful," I told myself, and put the portal under us just before she landed on me. The result was us sharing momentum as we were flung back out of the wall over the head of the blue cat monkey.

I twisted myself in the air and wrapped my arms around the pegasus' forelegs so she was riding on my back. The irony of the moment was not lost on me. For a three and a half foot tall horse, she was pretty light, which I figured probably indicated hollow bones for flight.

The landing wasn't perfect, but we survived. I carefully lowered the pegasus off my back. "Whew, talk about a close call. Are you O--OOF!" Two rear hooves to the butt later, I was sprawled out face down in the dirt.

"Are you bucking crazy?!" she screamed, "I was so close to getting the Sultan's Scimitar until you showed up! Now Auhizotl's gonna get away with it!"

The fact that the crazy horse was actually talking to me in the same language I spoke should have come as a surprise to me, but I was more concerned with the context of her words. "Excuse me?!" I snapped, turning around to face her, "I'm sorry, but it looked more like that Zowie Yodel guy was about to run you through with a sword. And I just sacrificed my ticket home so I could save your sorry ass, so I would appreciate it if you at least had the courtesy to thank me instead of kicking me!"

"Oh, yeah? Well..." She stopped and stared at me for a second before puffing out her cheeks and grinning. "Did you just call him 'Zowie Yodel?'"

I cocked an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

She sputtered and burst out laughing. "Oh, wow! I gotta remember that one next time I see him! Ha ha! Ow! Buck, my wing." She reached for her side and grabbed her injured wing with her hoof.

I knelt down next to her. "How bad is it?" I felt her wing. The bone didn't feel broken, but I wasn't taking any chances, especially with the way she winced at my touch. Setting my portal gun down, I opened her pack and started going through it.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing?" she asked.

"You're right," I said, "I shouldn't go through a lady's purse without being introduced." I didn't stop my search.

She raised an eyebrow at me. "Um..."

"Aha!" I found a bandage inside and two wooden slats. I put her wing between them and bound it tight. "There. That should do it."

She looked at it closely. "Are you a doctor, or something?"

I laughed. "Nah, my mom's a vet. She showed me how to bandage a bird wing. Yours isn't too different." I grinned and playfully punched her shoulder. "Now you owe me two."

She scowled. "You cost me the Sultan's Scimitar."

"And now I'm homeless for it," I said, going back to being serious, "I could have left you to that cat monkey thing and gone home, but I chose to save you instead."

The mare opened her mouth to speak, then stopped. She looked down in thought, then said, "How are you stuck?"

I sighed and picked up the portal gun. "Look." I fired both portals on the ground and stood over the blue one. "Look down into the other one."

The mare did so, and gasped. "How are you down there?"

I knelt down and poked my head through. "Portals," I said, "I can link any two points in space with this gun, as long as I have a clear line of sight between them." I sat back and pressed the emancipation button that dispelled both gates. "Unfortunately, my homeland isn't even on this planet. Unless I find some way of locating my world, I'm stuck here."

The pegasus looked at me sorrowfully. "So... you really are stuck here?"

I nodded. I kind of wanted to ask how we were speaking the same language, but it didn't seem to matter anymore.

She came up and put her hoof on my shoulder. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

I sighed. "It's fine."

We sat in silence for a moment before she spoke up. "Daring Do, archaeologist and explorer, at your service." She held a hoof out to me.

I held her hoof and shook it. "Ashton Lopez. Uh, high school graduate and free runner."

Daring laughed. "Free runner, huh? Nice. Don't suppose you mind carrying me again, do ya?"

I rolled my eyes. "Anyway, sorry about your sword. Any chance we can get it back?"

Daring shook her head. "Nope. Auhizotl's halfway back to his hideout by now." She exhaled sharply, blowing her bangs out of her enormous magenta eyes. "Whelp, you can't win 'em all." She stood up and brushed the dust off her flanks. "Come on, let's get out of this desert."

"You're letting me go with you?" I asked.

The mare grinned. "I still owe you for the wing. And I was serious about you carrying me. My wing is still sore. Unless you can portal us back to town."

I shrugged. "Gimme a good starting point, and I might be able too. Like I said, I need a line of sight."

"Here, lemme see that." She took the gun from me. "How do you shoot this thing?"

I grabbed it back. "You need fingers to shoot it."

She rolled her eyes and grabbed my arm, pulling me down to her level. "Fine, I'll aim, you shoot."

I gaped. "Can you see that far?"

Daring laughed. "I'm a pegasus, aren't I?"

I stared blankly.

She sighed and took aim. "Just shoot when I tell you to."