//------------------------------// // The Want Ads // Story: The Wild Card // by Tyrant //------------------------------// "I understand it's a little soon Twilight, but I need a job regardless. You can't keep me locked up in here, it's been three days since the Princess gave me the visa. I'm going stir-crazy woman!" Her ears flattened as I raised my voice, I didn't mean to but I'd been locked up in this library for three days!! I'm going crazy, the walls are closing in, I've read every book of interest on these shelves, and dammit even Owlowiscious is getting more action than me. "I know you're frustrated but we haven't even seen how you would act in a social setting with other ponies. We just started your social skills training yesterday, and you know most of the do's and dont's for social conversation. I even had planned what to do if you were approached from a romantic interest later this week." "I don't need relationship advice. Especially when--" "What?! Why?! Is it because I don't have a colt-friend or some special-pony?! I can give at least some good standard romance advice if you were approached by the opposite sex. Besides, I'll have you know I've been approached by a lot of good stallions in this town, even a few mares as well. So don't think I don't have options!" She was heaving as I sat back leaning on the wall. "...okay, touchy subject but no. However I doubt I can even date a mare without bits in my pocket. That's kinda elementary Twilight. Without any sort of funds it is kinda hard to court anyone, don't you think?" Turning my head I stared at the bookshelf voicing my doubtful thoughts aloud. "I'm still unsure on the idea of dating a female pony. It's not like I'm completely disgusted by the idea, but I think the best way to say it is I'll cross that bridge should I come to it, okay?" That caught her by surprise, her head fell slightly as she whispered a 'Oh'. I stared across the room eyes locking on to her. "I appreciate the idea of giving me advice, and I probably will ask you for some should the need arise, but as it stands right now.. I REALLY need to get outta this tree." "Well, I suppose some-ponies don't like being cooped up with books for three days straight, like I do, huh?" "Nope, I don't mind it, but I think three is where I cannot take anymore." "So what are you going to do now?" "What any guy does when he needs the cash, what my father an' forefathers did the soon as they heard of opportunity out west, what every damned man has to do an' probably hates every minute of it. I'm going to find me a job." "So what are your skills?" Ugh, I hated that question with a vengeance. This was my third job-interview today, thankfully these ponies had a different system than humans did. Not much on paperwork just walk-in, ask for the job, and there, instant success. ...Well it would be if a pony would be willing to hire me, dammit! "Well, I'm really good with lifting. I've got a lot of stamina, I am punctual, and I work cheap!" I smiled nervously trying to sound convincing, I mean really this was "Quills and Sofa's", how hard could it be to work here?! "Well, I'm sorry we are just not really looking for anyone right now. Business is a bit slow on the sofa side, y'know? So Quill's are really all I sell, a lot more actually since that librarian moved to town. Sometimes I even have to order extra just to make sure I can keep them in stock!" Sigh, this was another bust, and after I thanked the owner I decided to look at the list of jobs Twilight had written down for me. I started to go down the list, "Let's see, 'Animal Caretaker needed, please respond with utmost urgency.', Well it can't be that bad. I mean what kind of problems could arise from taking care of animals." I read that the location was a cottage on the far side of town, on the edge of Everfree. Huh, I wondered how big that forest was since I don't recall spotting a cottage when I met Twilight. As I tucked the paper in my back-pocket I started to recite what I could say to get this job. "I happen to love animals, yea I had a few dogs and cats back home where I lived. They were so much of a joy to take care of. Of course it won't be a problem to look after animals that may not be cats or dogs, I'm sure I can adapt very quickly. Humans have learned to domesticate all kinds of animals on my world, so I'm sure this will be no problem at all." Cringing from my sales pitch, the idea was just loathsome to have to exaggerate for every job. Seriously, I couldn't get a job at the Sugar Cube Corner because they told me that their other employee was a handful and having me there they couldn't afford anything to go wrong. That Mr. Cake was nice though, not compared to the next one. I was flatly told no by the next potential employer. It's alright though, I don't think I could have come up with a sales pitch to sale fans anyway. Finding the cottage I double checked the description to check this was the place. Walking up to the door each step I tried to repeat my introduction in my head, than knocked on the door lightly. 'Right, bend down, don't forget ponies don't like to stare up at something huge in their doorway.' I took a knee on the front porch and heard a soft "Hold on please." Wait... I know that voice, oh crap! "Yes? Oh! It's you, Mr. Siegfried. Can I help you?" There standing in the doorway was that pegasus from Twilight's. Fluttershy? Oh damn, hope I remembered her name right. Wait, dammit, no, not here for that, focus man! "Hello, I'm here about the ad." "The ad? What ad?" Reaching back I pulled the paper from my back-pocket and showed it to her. "Animal caretaker? I was looking for work in PonyVille and saw this ad, so I came to hopefully help out." "Oh! That ad, yes, of course. Uhm.. do you have any experience with animals?" "Well back where I come from I had a few pets. Two dogs and three cats, I also used to help my uncle with his chicken farm, I also have taken care of a goat for a cousin before. That's it really." "Wow, they had those kind of animals back where you come from? That is great, I was worried about having to say no to you." She seemed to let out a sigh of relief. I honestly felt myself relax as well not noticing I had tensed up as I listed all the animals I had taken care of back home. "Well I was curious on the job myself. This is your cottage correct? Are you overwhelmed or is it some kind of emergency?" She seemed to look past me, and with a heavy voice confessed that there was an emergency. Apparently her parents needed her to come home for some family issues. She really wouldn't tell me what, but I didn't even attempt to pry as I felt I knew all I needed to know. "So you need someone to watch over your animal friends while you are away at Cloudsdale, and you don't expect to be back for a while. I can help, is there anything specific I need to watch out for? Fluttershy seemed to look back into her home nervously, I looked behind her to see a small white rabbit who seemed to be looking at me with a glare. "Well, Angel bunny can be a real handful. Last time I had Spike watch over my animal friends Angel gave him such a hard-time. So I was worried it would happen again. He can be... difficult." I eyed the rabbit for a moment, and could see a flare of mischief in his eye. For a moment a thought raced across my mind as he locked eyes with mine, 'I can take him.' Breaking the stare my gaze shifted to Fluttershy, "So is there anything else?" "Oh! Yes, I have a rather large friend coming over tomorrow for a check-up. He may refuse but you simply must make sure that he is checked up. Are you sure this won't be a problem for you? I have so little time to teach you anything about them all, and I really do need to be packed up. I was worried no one would come and I really have to get going. Oh, maybe this is a bad idea." "Fluttershy, I can handle it, okay? I just need to know where you keep your medical supplies and go from there. Please leave everything to me." I attempted to reassure her, I really had no idea what to expect and I could almost guarantee that if I let on I was in over my head she'd go into a state of panic. "Right, of course. It's just I've never left them with anyone else before Spike, and I really am worried that they will give you such a hard time and you will just want to quit and than you both end up miserable. But I am really worried that something wrong could happen and you won't know what to do, Oh perhaps I should stay." "Fluttershy?" "Yes?" Grabbing her shoulders I stared into her eyes. "Please let me watch over your animals, okay? I promise I will make sure they are well cared for, and.. should I prove I'm more than capable of caring for your animal friends, could you be a recommendation for any future jobs I try to find?" "Of course. I would gladly put in a good word for you, thank you. I just get so nervous leaving them alone for too long. Thank you, I felt silly for being so worried." She showed me most of the supplies, some of the food storage so I could be sure to feed them in moderation, what each animal liked and didn't like and who needed to be kept an eye on. Her little bunny friend followed us looking at me with that same glare now and again, we were going to bump heads, I knew it. "So, Siegfried how do you like PonyVille so far?" We had just finished all the details of what I would be doing while she was gone when she asked me that. "Hard to say, I've actually been in Twilight's home for the last few days. Everything is sort of a blur. I know it's been about a week since I came but I haven't seen much of the town or had much contact with the locals. Besides Twilight you are the only one I've actually really spoken to." "I hope you don't think we're scared of you. I know you were.. different when I met you, but I honestly thought you were an interesting creature. I had no idea what you were and I was really curious having never seen anything like you. I'm actually relieved you're friendly. Especially when Spike had told me they found you in the Everfree forest." "Yea, Twilight explained to me about the Everfree. Is it really that bad?" "Oh yes. Well, I think so. I don't go in to the forest much. I've only gone in when it's an emergency, but I'm usually with my friends. There was this one time I went in alone, I was taking care of a friends little sister with her friends for a sleepover, and they wandered into the forest. When I found them we ran in to a cock-a-trice and it was really quite an adventure. I was scared though, did you know a cock-a-trice could turn you to stone?" "Stone? Really? Wow, I'll have to steer clear of that thing. What do they look like?" She explained to me some of the animals to steer clear of in the Everfree, should I ever need to venture into there again. I made sure to make mental notes so I can be on the safe side. "Fluttershy? I really want to thank you for the opportunity of allowing me to work. It means a lot to me." She nodded and had her head down obviously embarrassed. The action was very cute, and I felt my heart do a flutter from the way she had her eyes shyly glued to the floor. Deciding this was the best chance to leave, I excused myself and told her that I'd be back the next day bright and early to care for the animals.