//------------------------------// // Chapter 16: Secrets // Story: Daughters of the Purge // by Nebula Star //------------------------------// Chapter 16: Secrets *** Sunset stared at the princess, her eyes wide with shock. “You… you don’t mean… your daughter…?” Celestia nodded solemnly. “But… how!? How could nopony know? How could…” She sighed. “I didn’t want you growing up in the middle of all the Canterlot politics. I’ve seen far too many foals raised in such an environment become… less than noble ponies. I’d intended for you to be raised by your father.” “My father!?” “Captain Glimmering Shield, of my royal guard.” Celestia told her sadly. “We’d planned to raise you away from all that, so I kept my pregnancy a secret, using illusions to hide it; only your father and my royal physician ever knew. But then, just two months after you were born, your father was killed at the Fetlock Hills.” “The battle of the Fetlock Hills…” Sunset said softly. “Yes,” Celestia replied, sadness clear in her voice. After a moment Sunset looked up at her, tears in her eyes. “But, why did you send me to an orphanage? Why didn’t you raise me yourself!?” She demanded. Celestia winced. “I would have… despite my reservations, I would have raised you myself… Except… before she escaped, Achlys had sworn to destroy everything I cared about. And I knew that if she were to find out about you, that you would be her first target. As long as she was out there, I had to keep you a secret… I couldn’t do that and raise you myself.” Sunset looked down, her anger fading a little hearing that reasoning. From what she’d heard about Achlys, she would have definitely been in a great deal of danger. But still… “Why didn’t you tell me before?” “I… I wanted to. I really did…” “Why didn’t you!?” Sunset demanded, her anger rising again. “I was your student for ten years! I was more than old enough to understand if you’d just told me why! If you’d told me that my life was in danger, I would have understood! Why didn’t you tell me!?” Celestia lowered her eyes to the floor but didn’t answer. “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME!!!?” Sunset shouted, her anger erupting at the princess’s silence. Celestia flinched. “You were so prideful back then… I was worried…” Sunset glared at her; her teeth clenched as she realized what Celestia was hesitant to say. “You thought it would make me worse if I knew.” She winced again, but before she could reply there was a knock and the door opened as Twilight looked in. “Is everything okay?” She asked sounding concerned, having heard Sunset shouting. She looked between them noticing their expressions. “What’s going on?” Sunset just kept glaring at Celestia… at her mother, while Celestia kept her eyes on the floor. “Sunset?” Twilight asked. “She’s my mother,” Sunset told her finally. “And she never told me!” Twilight’s eyes widened and she looked over at Celestia. “What?” “I was her student for ten years! And she never told me!” Celestia’s continued silence was confirmation enough. “Why wouldn’t you tell her?” Twilight asked. “Because she didn’t trust me!” Sunset growled. “Celestia?” Twilight said softly, wanting the princess to say something, give some reason. Instead, she remained silent, her one visible eye filled with pain and sadness. Finally, Sunset had had enough. Getting to her hooves, she stormed out of the room and a few moments later Twilight heard one of the other bedroom doors slam shut. For a moment the room was silent; when it was clear Celestia wasn’t going to break it, Twilight did herself. “She’s your daughter?” Reluctantly, Celestia nodded. “You told me she grew up in an orphanage.” Twilight said, a little bit of accusation in her voice. “She did.” “Why would you give her up?” “I had intended for her father to raise her. But then he was killed at the Fetlock Hills. And with Achlys’ threat. I had to hide her.” Wincing, Twilight nodded, accepting that. She knew very well that Achlys would have gone after Sunset if she’d known that she was Celestia’s daughter. “Alright. But why didn’t you tell her when she was old enough?” “By then she was already so prideful, being my student… I was afraid that telling her would… would make her worse,” Celestia said softly, and Twilight saw a tear fall to the floor. Taking a deep breath, Twilight let it out in a sigh. “You should have told her.” Celestia’s shoulders slumped a little and her wings drooped at that declaration. As Twilight watched more tears joined the first. “I’ll talk to her; try to help her through this.” Finally raising her eyes, Celestia gave Twilight a hopeful look through her tears. Twilight returned a sad but reassuring smile. “I think she understands why you had to hide her; or at least she will, once she calms down. It’s just the not telling her until now that she’s angry about.” Celestia nodded sadly, lowering her eyes again. Stepping closer, Twilight reached out to place her hoof on Celestia’s shoulder in a comforting gesture. “I think Sunset is going to need some time to process this; away from here. I’ll take her back to Ponyville tomorrow, and I think it would be best if you wait until she’s ready to talk to you again.” “Yes… I think you’re right. She needs space right now.” She sighed heavily. “It’s just, she’s been gone for four years.” “I know. But give her time, and I’m sure she’ll forgive you eventually,” Twilight told her gently. Celestia nodded and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I’m sorry this is cutting your visit short.” Twilight just shrugged and waved the matter asside. “This visit was entirely for Sunset. It may not have turned out like either of us expected; but I think in time, she’ll be glad we made this trip.” With a sad yet hopeful smile, the elder princess got to her hooves. “Thank you, Twilight… I should probably go for now.” “I’ll look after Sunset for you.” Twilight told her reassuringly. With one last weak smile and a nod, Princess Celestia stepped out of the Room. Twilight followed seeing her out. Once she’d closed the door again, she turned back toward the study to find Winter and Dawn standing at the door watching with more than a little worry, Spike just behind them looking curious as well. “What’s going on?” Winter asked softly. Twilight sighed. She knew that Sunset being Celestia’s daughter would need to be kept secret for now, at least until they decided to announce it. But she was going to be living with them. And considering that it was Achlys or quite likely Spike who had killed Sunset’s father… They needed to know. Walking over to them, Twilight sat down facing them. “Celestia just told Sunset that she’s her mother.” “Seriously!?” Spike exclaimed while Winter and Dawn’s eyes widened. “She did not know?” Dawn asked in shock. Twilight shook her head. “That’s why Sunset is so upset. She grew up in an orphanage, but then became Celestia’s student for years; and in all that time Celestia never told her the truth.” “Why did she grow up in an orphanage if Celestia is her mother?” “Celestia put her there to hide her… from Achlys.” Their eyes widened again at their mother’s name. “Oh…” Winter said softly, sounding worried. “Achlys had threatened to destroy everything Celestia cared about.” Spike sighed. Winter looked down, seeming worried. Twilight knew that she’d spent a fair amount of time with Sunset over the past few days and that they’d been starting to become friends. And both her and Dawn had spent time with her discussing comics. Twilight reached out and pulled the two of them into a quick hug. “I don’t think she’ll think less of you for it,” she said giving them a reassuring squeeze. “There’s more we’ll need to talk about, but I think I better check on Sunset first. For now, keep this to yourselves.” They both nodded as she released them from the hug, and she gave them a thankful smile. Then, taking a deep breath, she turned to the other bedroom where Sunset had retreated. Quietly, she opened the door. “Sunset? You okay?” She called softly. Sunset didn’t answer. Scanning the room, Twilight spotted her laying sprawled across the bed looking like she’d thrown herself there and hadn’t moved since. Quietly she entered the room closing the door behind her. The rise and fall of Sunset’s barrel was too quick for her to have fallen asleep; but it didn’t seem quite right for normal breathing. It was as she drew close to the bed that she realized Sunset was silently crying. Without a word, Twilight climbed up onto the bed and laid down next to her stretching one wing around her. She didn’t react at all to the gesture, but didn’t object to it either. “I’m sorry. This trip hasn’t gone how either of us expected,” she said softly. Still Sunset didn’t respond. “I told Celestia that you’ll need some time to process this, and that we’ll be heading back to Ponyville tomorrow… unless you want to stay?” She shook her head, showing she was listening. “Alright then, we’ll head back on the morning train,” Twilight told her, but stayed where she was for a few moments more, trying to think of something to say to comfort her. “Princess Celestia does love you…” She didn’t respond, and just continued to silently cry held in Twilight’s wing. “You’re right, though; she definitely should have told you sooner.” Still Sunset remained silent. Twilight held her for a moment more trying to think of what she could say, but eventually gave up, deciding just to be there for Sunset for however long she needed or wanted. “You know,” Sunset spoke up suddenly; “most ponies think its horribly tragic for orphans to know what happened to their parents, to know how they died… But at least they know!" She sniffed, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Sometimes, not knowing can be even worse… Because if you don’t know… there’s always that horrible nagging feeling. That terrible thought, that out there, somewhere, your parents may still be alive; and they didn’t want you.” The last was spoken in a pained whisper and she took a shuddering breath, whimpering softly. Twilight pulled her more against her side, giving her a gentle squeeze with her wing. She’d never even considered how it would feel growing up not knowing who her parents were, or even if they were still alive. She supposed it wasn’t something one could really imagine without experiencing it themselves. “But you know now… and you know that Celestia did want you; she just had to protect you.” Sunset snorted softly. “And now you know who your father was. And as captain of the royal guard, there’s bound to be lots of records about him. I could get some copies if you’d like; that we could take back to Ponyville with us so you could learn about your father. Would you like that?” Twilight asked softly. After a moment Sunset nodded, and Twilight smiled. “Alright, I’ll have Feather get copies of all the records the royal guard has on him, and I’ll see if I can find any of his public records myself.” “Thanks, Twilight,” Sunset said softly. Twilight gave her one more squeeze with her wing. “You’re welcome, Sunset. You’ll be alright?” “Yeah… I just, need some time to think.” “Alright, I’ll go see what I can find, then. Spike and the girls will be here if you need anything; or just want somepony to talk to.” She nodded that she understood and Twilight climbed down off the bed, leaving the room and quietly closing the door behind her. Winter, Dawn and Spike were still in the study, she found, and they all looked up as she entered. “Sunset just needs some time to think.” Twilight told them all, seeing their expectant expressions. “I need to call Feather real quick, tell her the change in plans.” They nodded and Twilight tapped the gem on her bracelet. “Feather.” A moment later the connection chime sounded. “Captain Feather here.” “Hey, Feather, it’s Twilight.” “Oh, hey princess, need something?” Feather asked sounding more relaxed. “Yeah, there’s been a change in plans. We’re going to be heading back on the morning train.” “Did something happen?” Twilight sighed. “Yes, but it’s a personal matter between Sunset and Princess Celestia, nothing you need to worry about.” “… I see, alright, I’ll have the squad ready to escort you back to the station in morning.” “There’s one other thing. Could you get me copies of all the records the guard has concerning a Captain Glimmering Shield?” “Glimmering Shield?” Feather repeated with a little recognition in her voice. “Yes, have you heard of him?” “Well yeah, until last year he was the last captain of the royal guard to ever die in battle. He has a memorial in the castle gardens.” “That sounds right. Can you get me copies of those records to take with us back to Ponyville?” Twilight asked. “Shouldn’t be a problem, I’ll have them for you by the time we head to the train tomorrow,” Feather told her confidently. “Alright, thanks Feather.” “Of course, we’ll see you early tomorrow.” “See you then,” she said then tapped the gem twice to disconnect. “Who’s Captain Glimmering Shield?” Spike asked once the bracelet had chimed that it had disconnected. “Sunset’s father,” Twilight told him, giving him a significant look. “He was killed at the Fetlock hills.” Spike’s eyes widened. “Oh…” Winter looked over at Spike and her eyes widened as well. “You mean…” “I was most likely the one who killed him.” Spike said softly. “I was the one who fought most of the royal guard in that battle; Achlys mostly fought Celestia.” Twilight sighed heavily. “I think we’re going to have to tell Sunset; there’s a good chance she’d figure things out on her own, and I don’t want her thinking we were trying to hide it from her.” Winter lowered her eyes and nodded. Dawn looked a little worried but followed her sister’s lead. Twilight looked at them. She knew it would be best to tell Sunset of her own connection to Achlys as well; but first she needed to tell the fillies… Lighting her horn she cast a privacy ward. Recognizing the spell Winter looked up at her curiously. Twilight sat down in front of her and her sister. “Girls, there’s something I need to tell you as well. I’d wanted to give you a little more time to get settled and to get to know me, but I think I’d better just tell you now.” “What is it?” Dawn asked sounding a little worried. “It’s about what happened between Achlys and I,” Twilight said softly. “You said she killed you, and that the Tree of Harmony brought you back,” Winter said, and Dawn nodded. “That’s right, but that’s not all of it. You see, when Achlys first fought Celestia and was defeated, she was badly injured and still greatly weakened by how she’d escaped from her prison. She knew that she’d need years to recover fully. She also knew that Celestia would be hunting her. So in order to hide, she turned herself into a unicorn foal and placed herself in a family, altering memories and records so that they would believe she was theirs. Then she created a artificial soul from a fragment of her own, and placed it in control as a mask to hide behind while she recovered.” Winter seemed to realize what Twilight was leading to and her eyes widened. “That soul was me,” Twilight confirmed. “Achlys created me from a part of her own soul.” Dawn’s eyes widened then as well. “Mother created you?” Twilight nodded. “When she woke, I tried to resist her, to fight back. Obviously, she didn’t like that. She separated us, casting me out to die. But the Tree of Harmony must have known what I was and had already prepared a way to bring me back, giving me a body of my own.” “So… you are not connected to Achlys anymore?” Winter asked a little worried. Twilight shook her head. “No, she’s gone.” She considered that and finally shrugged. “I suppose it does not really matter then.” Twilight smiled, glad her worries about their reactions were unfounded. “It is partially why I wanted to look after you two though,” she told them. “You see, Achlys made me; so in a way, that kind of makes me your sister too.” Winter smiled, seeming to like that idea, but Dawn looked thoughtful. “But you said mother made you from part of her soul; so would that not make you more our mother?” “I’d never thought of it that way, but I suppose you could see it like that,” Twilight told her. Dawn nodded eagerly. “And now you hath adopted us, so you are our mother now!” Twilight winced. “Well, no, I named myself your legal guardian, that’s not quite the same as adopting you,” she clarified. “Oh…” Dawn looked down a moment, her disappointment clear. Then she looked up again, hopefully. “Would you?” “Adopt you?” Twilight asked. She nodded. Of all the possible results she’d imagined for this conversation, having Dawn ask her to adopt them wasn’t one of them. But, looking down at her, seeing the hopeful look in her eyes, Twilight knew there was only one answer: “Yes. If you want me to.” Smiling joyfully, Dawn nodded and rushed forward wrapping her hooves around Twilight, hugging her tightly. Twilight hugged her back feeling joyful tears coming to her eyes, then gave Winter a questioning look, wondering if she wanted the same. Understanding, Winter nodded, then joined in on the hug as Twilight wrapped a wing around her as well. She knew it was a major decision, but in that moment, holding the sisters in her wings, she didn’t have any doubts. “I guess I have some more paperwork to do.” Both fillies and Spike all laughed, hearing a little excitement in Twilight’s voice. After a moment more, they finally broke apart. Both fillies were smiling happily, though as they looked up at Twilight. “Well, I’d say welcome to the family, but like Twilight said, we kind of already were.” Spike said grinning. Winter and Dawn both looked back at him and smiled, then Dawn got up and went to hug him as well. Spike laughed and gladly accepted. “This will just make it official,” Twilight said. “And it feels good to finally tell you both. I’ve been a little worried how you’d react.” “Perhaps when we first arrived, we would have worried if you told us; like we worried about Spike,” Winter told her. “But we do know you now,” she glanced at Spike. “Both of you.” “Thanks, for giving me a chance,” Spike said smiling gratefully. “Anyway, I thought it best to tell you now, because, like I said earlier, Sunset’s father was killed at the Fetlock Hills in the battle with Achlys. So, I think it would be best if we all tell Sunset our connection to Achlys so she doesn’t think we were trying to hide it from her,” she looked up at Spike. “And as difficult as it may be; I think it would be best if you tell her the role you played in that battle.” Spike sighed heavily. “Yeah…” “We’ll wait until we’re back home, though; Sunset needs some time to think as it is,” Twilight assured him. “For now, I need to go down to the castle archives and see what records I can find on Sunset’s father,” she told them then smiled and added “And I’ll see if I can get the paperwork needed to officially adopt you both.” Dawn grinned and couldn’t resist hugging Twilight again while Winter just smiled. “Do you need any help?” Spike asked. “No, I should be able to handle it. You three stay here in case Sunset decides she wants to talk or just needs a distraction,” Twilight said as Dawn released her. Winter nodded. “We will be here for her.” “Thanks. I shouldn’t be too long,” Twilight told them, then after canceling the privacy ward, headed for the castle archives. While not nearly as large as the Canterlot Royal Library, the archives held much more of the kind of public records that she was looking for. And also unlike the library, the archives would still be open at this hour. ~~~ The next morning saw them all on the Train. Sunset still seemed to be emotionally on edge, but so far had spent most of the trip distracting herself by looking through the records Feather and Twilight had provided concerning her father. Twilight had to admit, just from the few bits that Sunset had shared with them, he certainly sounded like an impressive stallion. He’d advanced through the ranks of the royal guard nearly as rapidly as her own brother had and became captain of the guard by the time he was in his mid-twenties. He’d then become the captain of Celestia’s personal guard a few years later where he’d served for only two years before he’d died. Twilight couldn’t help wondering if he and Celestia had already started becoming close when she made him captain of her guard, or if their relationship had started after. Either way, it would have been less than a year after he became her captain that Sunset had been conceived. Sunset had gone through all the records that Feather had provided from the guard’s archives in the first hour of the ride down the mountain. Now she was getting into some of the other public records Twilight had found when they were nearing Ponyville. The train was just starting to slow coming into the Ponyville station when Twilight noticed Sunset staring at one of the genealogical charts she’d found. “Find something interesting?” “I have a living aunt,” she said sounding shocked. “Really?” Twilight asked. As late as it had been, she hadn’t really looked that closely at the records when she’d found them. The genealogical records she’d looked at just long enough to make sure they included Sunset’s father and that was all. “It doesn’t list a date of death; so that would mean she’s alive, right?” “I would assume so, unless she died very recently. But the archivists at the castle usually keep these kinds of things pretty up to date, and it’s not like she’d be that old.” “Looks like her husband passed a few years ago, wonder what happened; he was only fourty-three. But she does have a son that’s still alive… he’d be my cousin I guess.” “I could try to find out their current residence if you’d like to meet them,” Twilight suggested. Sunset took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Maybe some other time… I just wonder why… Celestia… didn’t ask her to take me in.” Twilight frowned, that was a good question. “I don’t know. Maybe they were having a hard time and Celestia didn’t think they could handle the additional burden; she wouldn’t have been able to help without it being a clue to who you were.” “I guess…” Sunset said a little bitterly. Twilight gave her a sympathetic smile. “There’s still a lot we don’t know, Sunset. Try not to assume the worst.” She sighed and looking up, noticed that the train was slowing. “We almost there?” “Yeah, we’re just braking, coming into the station,” Twilight told her, letting her change the subject. Sunset nodded and started putting the documents back into their folders. “Thanks again, for finding all this for me.” “Of course. I was glad to help.” She grinned. “Besides, it’s not like I’ve ever objected to a little research.” She gave a small smile, but didn’t laugh as she finished putting away all the records on her father. “It’s nice to finally know a little bit about who he was…” “I wish we knew who our father was.” Dawn said sadly, sitting next to Twilight. Sunset looked up at her. “You don’t?” “Mother never told us.” Winter answered from Twilight’s other side. “And she always had several stallions she kept around for…” she glanced at Dawn before finishing, “…that sort of thing.” Twilight blushed as she realized that while Winter apparently already knew about such things; it seemed she’d likely have to have that talk with Dawn at some point. Oddly she noticed Spike was blushing too and couldn’t help wondering what he might know about Achlys that would prompt that reaction. She’d have to ask later. As the train slowed further, they all joined Sunset in preparing to disembark. ~~~ A little nervous, Winter knocked on Sunset’s door with Dawn, Twilight and Spike. They’d only been back to the castle for a short while, but they’d all agreed it would be better to tell her sooner rather than later. Sunset answered after a few moments and looked at them all, seeming a little surprised. “Hey, something up?” “Yes. There’s something we all need to talk about.” Twilight told her. Sunset glanced at Winter then looked back at Twilight. “Uh, sure. Come on in,” she said letting them into the sitting room. Jumping up on one of the plush arm chairs, she let them choose from the couch and other chairs. “So what’s this about?” she asked once they were all seated. Before anyone spoke, Twilight cast a privacy spell around the room. “It’s for the best that we keep this between us, so I need to ask you to not mention any of this to anyone outside this room except my friends or the princesses.” “Alright, I won’t tell anyone.” “Thank you… We didn’t tell you before because we didn’t think it mattered, but now… we don’t want you to think we were hiding anything from you.” “So what is it?” Winter sighed and glanced at Dawn who looked back trying not to look worried; they’d spoken briefly on how to handle this and decided it would be best for her to go first, since they believed it would be the easiest for Sunset to accept. “I have mentioned Dawn and I’s mother a few times…” “Was she Achlys?” Sunset asked, seeming to know the answer. Winter looked surprised but lowering her eyes she nodded, Dawn doing the same by her side. Taking a deep breath, Sunset let it out slowly. “I kind of figured, after the way the two of you reacted when we talked about Achlys on the train to the Crystal Empire.” She said then looked at Winter and Dawn each in turn. “It’s okay. I don’t blame you for what your mother did.” Raising her eyes, Winter smiled gratefully. “I’m afraid that’s not all,” Twilight told her, going next. “I told you the official story of what happened between Achlys and I, but that wasn’t the full truth. What the official story leaves out, is just where Achlys had been hiding all those years.” “What do you mean?” Sunset asked looking at her. She sighed. “To put it simply; she was hiding in me.” “In you?” Twilight nodded. “Achlys… she turned herself into a unicorn foal, then created me as an artificial soul, putting me in control of her body as a kind of mask while she hid deep inside. I didn’t even know she was there until she woke up.” Sunset stared at her in shock. “She created you?” “Yes, from a piece of her own soul.” She continued to stare, trying to grasp what she was being told. “You mean you’re a part of her?” “I was,” Twilight confirmed softly. “Are you still?” “No. When she woke, I tried to fight back, to resist her, and she severed me from her and cast me out to die. But the Tree of Harmony must have known what I was, because it had already prepared a way to bring me back with a body of my own.” Sunset looked down for a moment thinking. Finally, she shook her head, looking up at Twilight. “Well, I can’t blame you any more than the fillies. You didn’t have any choice how you were made after all. That is pretty crazy though.” “Definitely… but thanks. Like I said, we just didn’t want you to think we were hiding this from you. But… Unfortunately the last thing we need to tell you may be a little more difficult for you to hear,” Twilight told her sadly then looked over at Spike. Sunset looked as well, glancing between them. “What do you mean?” Spike sighed, knowing it was his turn. “You’ve read about the battle of the Fetlock Hills, right?” She nodded looking at him, then her eyes widened a little. “Achlys had a dragon with her…” She said softly. “Deimos… that’s what I was called back then,” Spike told her, not wanting to drag it out. “It was you!?” Sunset gasped. Spike nodded, lowering his eyes. “Yes… and while I can’t remember for certain; most likely… I was the one who killed your father.” “What?” “Achlys mostly fought Celestia during the battle… I was the one that… held off the guard.” Sunset looked between Spike and Twilight, tears coming to her eyes. “You’re Deimos!? You killed my father!?” “He’s not Deimos anymore!” Twilight insisted. “Spike, tell her what happened after.” Sunset looked at him expectantly several emotions flickering across her expression. “What happened!?” She demanded. Spike sighed heavily. “Achlys wanted to keep me close while she was in hiding, so she locked my memories away, reduced me back into a hatchling, and encased me in an egg. She then arranged for Twilight to eventually be enrolled in Celestia’s school where she hatched that egg. Twilight raised me as Spike. I know now that those years were the happiest I’d ever lived. Then when Achlys woke, she returned my memories.” He grimaced shaking his head. “I hated it. I hated who I’d been. I hated being Deimos. But I was too afraid of her to turn against her. Especially after she killed Twilight. Even so I tried to help Celestia and the others in secret… for Twilight. It wasn’t until Luna sprung her trap and Achlys wanted me to save her that I found the courage to tell her no.” Sunset stared at him, pain and anger waring with understanding. “You were loyal to her back then?” “As Deimos… yes, I was loyal to Achlys. She had raised me to be a monster. And that’s what I was.” “You were following her orders then?” He sighed and nodded. “Yes.” Sunset stared at him a moment more, almost trembling. “I… I need some time to think.” Twilight nodded sadly, understanding as she and the others got up and prepared to leave. “Okay, but Sunset, please remember, Spike isn’t Deimos anymore.” “I… alright.” Silently Twilight led them out, Spike being the last to leave. “I’m sorry, Sunset.” He said softly, then silently closed the door.